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STILL sad at daycare drop-off

greyt00greyt00 member
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
DS2 will be 23 months old in 2 days.  He has been going to the same day care all day long since he was about 14 months old.  Before that, my mom kept him.  He is in his 3rd room now (he did 12-18M, 18-24M, and just a month ago transitioned to 24-30M room).  When we first started taking him, he didn't cry and I was shocked.  I don't think we had any problems in that room.  After he transitioned to the next room he started crying at drop-off.  He didn't do it the whole time in there, but for a lot of it.  Some days he doesn't actually cry but he pouts.  Anyway, he is still doing it in the new room.  One of the teachers from his 2nd room transitioned with him and some of other kids, so there are plenty of familiar faces.  I am not concerned at all that anything is "wrong" at day care.  I think he has fun.  We check the cameras sometimes and he is nearly always happy when we pick him up (not happy to leave, was already happy).  They have not expressed any concerns about him and they seem to like him.  Anyone else have a toddler that is pouty about drop-off long-term?  It makes me sad, I really wish he would get over it.  I don't think he stays upset for long at all.  Is he just a drama queen?  I don't have exact figures but it has been going on for months now. 

 
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Re: STILL sad at daycare drop-off

  • SunshineShadesSunshineShades member
    My DD is almost 19 months and cries 99% of the time when we drop her off at daycare.

    BFP #1 05/03/12 DD: 12/18/12
    BFP #2 05/26/14 MMC: 6/26/14 D&C: 7/18/14
    BFP #3 10/09/14 MC 10/24/14


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  • greyt00greyt00 member
    Thank you for replying.  I hope they get over it soon, but I think DS2 is going to be like this for awhile. 

     
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  • vvvvvfeevvvvvfee member
    my DS is often like this at daycare drop-off, particularly when i am the one doing the drop-off. he clings to me and won't let me put him down. he has to be cajoled by the DC staff. sometimes he gives in quickly, other times i stay for a little while but he's still upset when i leave. he is fine after a few minutes and fine during the day and fine at pick-up. it does suck and makes me feel horribly guilty sometimes. i think it is a phase, though. he was (understandably) clingy when we had to switch him to this DC at 15 months, then he was fine for a while, and now he's clingy again. hopefully it will pass.

    p.s. there was a similar thread recently on the working moms board: https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12382367/is-this-normal-2-year-old-stuff
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  • sunkissed7804sunkissed7804 member
    I don't think he is a drama queen.  I think he just loves his mama and knows that you are leaving him!  Try to validate his feelings instead of saying that it's no big deal, you're okay, etc.  Example: "You're sad because mommie's leaving.  I'm sad too.  You will have fun today!"

    I would almost guarantee that he cries for about a minute until he realizes you are gone and then goes about his business of playing  and socializing.  It's just a thing that they do from time to time.  He may always do it.  He may do it sometimes and not others. Toddlers have moods and emotions just like we do.

    I'm sure you know this but try to make goodbye's as quick as possible.  Try to do it the same every day.  "Give mommie your biggest bye bye hug so it can last me all day!!"  Then say bye bye and leave.  Don't linger! jaja

    Also, something that was sweet, awesome and fun for my daughter when she was that age was doing "The Kissing Hand"...It is a book but the message and routine can always be used!  My daughter is almost 8 years old and still does it!!!  Check it out here...

    https://www.amazon.com/The-Kissing-Hand-Audrey-Penn/dp/1933718005/ref=pd_bxgy_b_text_z

    Good luck!!! :)


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  • greyt00greyt00 member
    edited July 2014
    Most of the time his dad drops him off, but we make it quick.  He used to cling to me very badly.  Teacher had to pry/lure him away.  I didn't even want to hug him then because he would re-cling.  I really don't think anything that I say to him will help, but I will try to validate his feelings.  

    It's been going on for months already so for him it's not a transition to a new room issue.  He likes cleaning up and in general is very cooperative.  Guess I should just expect it to be around a longer time.

     
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  • loeroamloeroam member

    DS is 16 months and cries at drop off 3 out of 5 days on average.  DH drops him off in the "early drop off" room while I put the stuff in his cubby in the toddler room.  Most of the time, he is done crying before I even get done putting his things away for the day.  Then I sneak past the door to the drop off room b/c if he sees me, he starts all over again.

    When we pick him up in the afternoon, half of the time he runs away from us b/c now he doesn't want to leave!

    It might not be that he is sad - it could be that he is just mad he can't stay with you and as soon as he starts playing, he's not mad anymore.

     

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  • Starfish+77Starfish+77 member
    DD is 19 mos and goes through phases of being ok with it and then upset. Especially when she has transitioned rooms it takes a couple of weeks for her to not be upset at drop off. Lately she has daddy separation anxiety and is crying hard in the AM when he drops her off and when he puts her to bed. She won't let me put her to bed or give her a bath. She points at me, to the bedroom door and say bye bye. :-( Hope drop off gets better for you!! So hard... But I'm sure it's just a quick thing before she's having fun.
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