Breastfeeding
Options

Weird topic - do you have any family members that are weirded out by you BF'ing+

your child???  I think it's totally odd that anyone would try to discourage you wanting to BF or do what's best for your baby and you....for example, a family member making a comment that oh, she'd like to be able to hold the baby/give the baby a bottle, blah blah....ever have this experience?  It's funny how embarrassed some people get by this, but to see a woman's breasts in a movie/in a magazine, yeah, that's perfectly fine & normal, but to use your breasts to feed your baby, ew, that's gross they think.
~Jen
Married since 8.17.03
Mom to Richard 7.24.05, Ava 3.27.08, Isabella 5.19.09 & Timothy 10.22.14




Re: Weird topic - do you have any family members that are weirded out by you BF'ing+

  • Options
    yes! my dh's family is totally weirded out by it and always ask annoying questions like "can you eat that? should you be drinking that? does it hurt? how long are you going to do it for? why do you do it? how long does it take?" my dh's grandma actually told me it was a waste of time and she never did it with any of her kids and said she would pump it and dump it down the drain, she said she was going to donate it to a milk bank but they wanted her to deliver it and she just couldn't be bothered so she just dumped it out. my mil looked at me like i was crazy when she found out that i was breastfeeding and she's a nurse!
  • Options
    Not really, my family is for the most part pretty supportive and understanding. None of the moms or grandmothers breastfed so I think they are fascinated by it, lol. They ask a lot of questions and seem interested. However, they do LOVE to make awkward comments about my baby being a loud eater, how my DH probably wishes he was the baby, and they tell my LO constantly that they have breasts but no milk. The comments were kinda funny the first few times they were said, but they are getting old quick, but I can tell they are trying to be supportive.
    happily married since 2009, SAHM
    diagnosed with unexplained infertility, regular cycles
    Baby #1: ttc naturally for 3 years, 6 yr old daughter
    Baby #2: ttc naturally for 2 years, 2 yr old son
    Baby #3: ttc naturally since August 2016
  • Loading the player...
  • Options
    For the most part, I've had good support. My dad was surprisingly more supportive than my mom initially, but she's supportive now too for the most part, she didnt breastfeed me at all and my brother very little. My inlaws have been very supportive, my MIL breastfed both my DH and his brother for 2 years each. My best friend unfortunately was not very supportive, because she had twins a month before my LO was born and ended up formula feeding and it created some tension on the issue.
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
  • Options
    My mom. She watches DS while I'm at work. Months ago, she "joked" that she was going to give him formula; I "joked" that I'd kill her. No formula was given, and she's still alive. She told me she didn't bf me or my brother because boobs are for sex; her thought, not mine.

    DS is 8 1/2 months, and she's gotten better. She'll actually stay in the room while I'm nursing now--- something she wouldn't do when he was first born, even though I'd use a cover.

    I love my mother, and we have a long history of agreeing to disagree on most topics, so it didn't faze me. Luckily, my best friend has a 2 yo she nursed, so she was my BFing sage since my mom was unsupportive/unknowledgeable.
  • Options
    My Dad used to be very weirded out, my DD is almost 6 months and he is getting used to it. Today at a restaurant I fed her at the table, and he was very embarrassed. Don't think that will ever change! He does sometimes comment that it would be easier to give her formula. I find it weird since my mom breastfed 3 children. The rest of my family is very supportive.
  • Options
    edited June 2014
    My ILs were really uncomfortable and would leave the room when I did it (and I was discreet). They would constantly ask how long I was planning on bfing, he didn't need it anymore, etc. After a year they got really pushy. Luckily I never even had to defend myself because my fabulous H would be right on them with all the benefits of BFing if they said anything. Hopefully with LO#2 it wont be an issue, because it was effing annoying!
    The rest of my family is SUPER supportive, especially my parents and sister.


     

  • Options
    My mom breastfed me so she was completely supportive. My MIL did not breastfeed because the doctors told her formula was better for her children than breast milk. She wasn't exactly unsupportive but she did set an end date for breastfeeding.  I smiled, nodded, and ignored her.  

    My cousin (who is normally super liberal) recently posted a rant on fb about people breastfeeding in public and how they should pump and then bottle feed.  I pointed out many of the reasons why this was not always a possibility at which point he responded "then stay the f home", he also said a lot of other awful things that really just proved how little he knows about breastfeeding.  We don't really have a relationship outside of fb so after being pissed for a few hours I was able to move on but if it had been in person or we had regular contact it would have a serious negative impact on our relationship.  
  • Options
    mmookimmooki member
    My in laws were not thrilled that I was planning to bf lo. After all, what if dh wanted to feed the baby? Because when babies don't nurse/take bottles anymore, they don't eat. -_-

    They eventually got used to it. I think they were expecting me to just sit around topless when baby needed to eat. No one in Dh's family ever nursed, so they didn't have any experience with it.
    BabyFetus Ticker
     
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Options
    My family/friends are generally supportive of my BF. Funny enough my dad is 100% where as all the ladies of my life give me a little more "grief". Whenever we're together and I feed my LO (i'm always discreet) they ALWAYS start with the questions/, 'how long do i plan on bf?' 'i better not be one of those "ridiculous" women how feed their children until they are school aged' etc. In the beginning the questions didn't really bother me but now I'm tired of them, I mean they even come from women who BF their own children. It's pretty annoying. 
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    BFP 6/9/13... here we go again
  • Options
    My mom has been very supportive and kind of like my cheerleader. She BF me, but stayed at home during that time, so she said BFing was easier. She says she's proud that I still continue to BF even while working full time. I only get weird comments every now and then from my MIL. I think she's just really curious about the whole thing bc she didn't BF her children.. She seemed somewhat disappointed to learn that starting the baby on solids at 6 months did not mean weaning from BFing. I realize it's a control issue with her: my BFing the baby means she can't take the baby for long periods of time without my say and coordination of nursing.
    IAmPregnant Ticker
  • Options

    As moms we have to do what is best for our family regardless of what others think. So while breastfeeding is natural, normal, and best for you - others may not see it that way. I stumbled upon this article recently and it is perhaps a stretch to share here but you may find it informative -


    https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/dry-land-fish/201304/my-breasts-are-me-not-just-feeding-babies

  • Options
    flclflcl member
    Yeah, my MIL, who didn't nurse her three kids, use to make comments about how feeding LO on demand is a bad idea.  She also wanted to give LO bottles all time.  Then LO went on a bottle strike and she suggested giving him formula so that he'll take bottles instead of nursing.  I think my MIL may be somewhat similar to @southRNcomfort 's in that she wants to be able to take LO for however long she wants.  
  • Options
    I think ALL of my family members are going to be uncomfortable with it. They've all already made comments about, "It's fine if you want to do it, I just don't want to see it," (in regards to strangers, not about me but still). They've also already made comments about how people shouldn't BF past a certain age, and how it becomes creepy and I better not do that. They always say, "I'm sorry, ...." then some unpopular opinion like that makes it okay. It stresses me out a bit already just because my MIL will be the one watching LO when I go back to work, so she better get on board the BF train because she's going to have to feed him the pumped milk I send with him. 

    My mom and DH's mom / grandma didn't BF. I don't know about his family, but I think that maybe my mom feels like I'm making a statement about *her* parenting based on my choices, and I don't really know what to do about that. I totally understand people who don't want to BF, I just wish that she and my IL would give me the same consideration.
    BabyFruit Ticker
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • Options
    edited July 2014
    Yes--my mom finds bf-ing "gross" and is always pushing me to wean. DD is only 6 months old! I wish I had her support, but it will never happen
    image


  • Options
    MH is supportive.

    MIL breastfed all her kids ranging from 1-3 years.

    My mum also breastfed, but only until my siblings and I had teeth. She has been pushing for formula and "real food" for months now. I started introducing solids at 6 months. Getting really annoying. Especially when she joked in hospital after LO's birth that she was going to give LO formula when I was sleeping; then she got upset when I said that would be a huge violation of my trust and that she'd have short supervised visits only. She keeps asking when I'm going to stop bf (LO is 10 months). This is turning into quite the rant... thinking it might be because she wants to have LO over alone for longer or that she feels judged that I am breastfeeding longer. I don't know. The judging part is ridiculous because it's not a competition and I'm happy she breastfed at all. Once LO goes past a year I imagine I'll get even more comments from her and others.
  • Options
    I don't really think that anyone else has a say in how you/SO decide that you will feed your child :) Everyone in my family is super supportive; my dad just leaves the room - I think that has more to do with him watching his "little girl" pull out her naked breast and feed her child :)
    Image and video hosting by TinyPicImage and video hosting by TinyPic


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

  • Options
    My in laws get squirmy when I even mention breastfeeding. They are all for me pumping and giving bottles, because they think that's their way of bonding with LO. I've had to basically say if I'm with the baby, he's getting the boob. My family is super supportive and thinks it's great I'm breastfeeding. They don't think it's an issue me BFing him anywhere.

    DS #1 born January 2010. DS #2 due June 2014.

This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"