OPK time / and busy DH schedules

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

Question ladies,

With my husband working nights, and the limited time we do interact - do you ladies have any suggestions regarding making the most of the time spent together, and working in the sexy tango without making it all about the "well, it's cooking time, and we have a 12-32 hour window..." and I get so bored I stop listening to myself. I have a very supportive on board DH, but I know how the stress of his job (police officer) and the time limits can really take the magic out of it.

Any suggestions help.

and yes I'm not shy and I'll wear a sexy get up, but every time? Meh? Thoughts?

Thanks. xo

p.s. totally craving bacon like you wouldn't believe now.

chaysefaith · June 2014

My SO works nights, too. It's hardest if O happens to fall during his long week at work, which it did last cycle. We do morning sex when he gets home and lunch time quickies.

ETA: I just send him dirty pictures all night long. It helps.

mandi195 · June 2014

My DH is also a police officer, who works nights, so I can totally relate. My approach is simple, I'm just not subtle about it... Simply put, instead of making it about "we need to do this because I'm fertile right now and you'll be home for x hours,etc" I will text him right around when he gets off work about how I can't wait for him to get home, and how I want to do xyz with him when he gets home. Usually works pretty well

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

outfits - check. (balancing act)

quickies - check check.

morning sex - check check check.

Thanks!

Totally other way personal question and I really hope I don't offend anyone when I'm asking this question I'm new to this whole posting thing - were all married / committed / having sexy tango with the significant others / hubs = my DH is a fan of this whole pre game giving and receiving orally, and I'm reading stuff about how saliva is the horrible for conception. I can google until i'm blue in the face, and I do NOT have it in me to ask my doctor this question. Ergo, I'm asking you guys ... (hides blushing face)

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

mandi195 said:

My DH is also a police officer, who works nights, so I can totally relate. My approach is simple, I'm just not subtle about it... Simply put, instead of making it about "we need to do this because I'm fertile right now and you'll be home for x hours,etc" I will text him right around when he gets off work about how I can't wait for him to get home, and how I want to do xyz with him when he gets home. Usually works pretty well

Rock on fellow LEO wife! So thankful someone understands my schedule concerns. Yes, I did that this month, and he was like "I'm riding two man today" - so that's a clear indication of "please don't send any photos right now" HAHA. I know he's all clear when I get a response of "So you were saying ? " HAHA

newlysouthern · June 2014

I agree with the ladies above. There's less pressure when you don't tell him it's O time and just surprise him instead. It'll be more fun if he's relaxed and you're both just enjoying each other rather than thinking about TTC.

When my DH has to work late I usually wake him up with kisses the next morning and I haven't been turned down yet

mandi195 · June 2014

I haven't heard that personally, and aside from googling it myself, I have no idea. I'd say it probably isn't an issue; I mean, it's not like he's spitting inside of you or anything, right? (If he is, don't tell me). However, I'd personally shy away from adding anything else into the equation (spit, lubes, etc) when TTC.

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

newlysouthern said:

I agree with the ladies above. There's less pressure when you don't tell him it's O time and just surprise him instead. It'll be more fun if he's relaxed and you're both just enjoying each other rather than thinking about TTC.

When my DH has to work late I usually wake him up with kisses the next morning and I haven't been turned down yet

Excellent idea. He's on to me, and he'll ask me each morning this week: is it testing time?
I had a BFN on 11 dpo and 12dpo - so he's being supportive. *happy thoughts*

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

mandi195 said:

I haven't heard that personally, and aside from googling it myself, I have no idea. I'd say it probably isn't an issue; I mean, it's not like he's spitting inside of you or anything, right? (If he is, don't tell me). However, I'd personally shy away from adding anything else into the equation (spit, lubes, etc) when TTC.

Oh my god No. Sorry had to address that. LOL
I agree, staying away from that stuff.

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

bibliothecary said:

LindsRockies said:

TTC sex sometimes is mechanical and not fun, it comes with the territory. I think wearing a sexy getup every time would get really old.

If it was me, I would just not tell my H that I'm fertile and have sex with him when I have the opportunity.

Is it bad that I start off Fertile Week with "let's get fuckin!"? Subtlety is not my strong suit.

HAHAHAHA Mind if I borrow that in two weeks? LOL

Snickerdoodle24 · June 2014

bibliothecary said:

-snip-

Is it bad that I start off Fertile Week with "let's get fuckin!"? Subtlety is not my strong suit.

Love it!
I usually tell DH "It's go time!" as soon as I get a positive opk, but I may borrow your line next time.

Cythe · June 2014

We had a thread discussing the oral/saliva issue. Its probably around pg2 by now. Anyway, TD;Dr is some ladies avoid it like the plague, some are just fine with it as long as you don't use saliva as lube.

getnauti · June 2014

ChaoswithGrace said:

mandi195 said:

My DH is also a police officer, who works nights, so I can totally relate. My approach is simple, I'm just not subtle about it... Simply put, instead of making it about "we need to do this because I'm fertile right now and you'll be home for x hours,etc" I will text him right around when he gets off work about how I can't wait for him to get home, and how I want to do xyz with him when he gets home. Usually works pretty well

Rock on fellow LEO wife! So thankful someone understands my schedule concerns. Yes, I did that this month, and he was like "I'm riding two man today" - so that's a clear indication of "please don't send any photos right now" HAHA. I know he's all clear when I get a response of "So you were saying ? " HAHA

+1

divinemsbee · June 2014

I read these threads and I feel like I am a terrible wife and you should all feel sorry for my husband. Pretty much since we started trying I just tell him when it's go time. I've never shied away from telling him it's my FW and we need to get crackin'. So we do it. He wants a baby, I want a baby, and decently well-timed sex is how we get a baby (unless we move on to more medical interventions next). It's not always sexy (but it's a good 70/30 split in favor of sexy) and it's not always fun (again, 70/30), but it gets the job done.

I totally get if you're just starting out wanting to do the whole sexpot/outfits thing, but I am lazy. We do make sure to have plenty of good, sexy, relaxed, non-baby making sex for the rest of my cycle, but for about 5 days it's business time. Works for us.

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

Second question: why are some girls like really big B's on this site? They are like hardcore mean to some girls ripping them apart. Granted I just read a post about from attention chick posting BFP's on the TTC boards, etc etc. I get that, but other times, and correct me if I'm wrong, it's like some girls pick just to pick. I just finished OITNB, and I feel like I need to find my personal Red, or fight
someone to earn some street cred. LOL

Cythe · June 2014

@divinemsbee‌ thanks for dripping "sexpot" into the conversation!!

Cythe · June 2014

ChaoswithGrace said:
Second question: why are some girls like really big B's on this site? They are like hardcore mean to some girls ripping them apart. Granted I just read a post about from attention chick posting BFP's on the TTC boards, etc etc. I get that, but other times, and correct me if I'm wrong, it's like some girls pick just to pick. I just finished OITNB, and I feel like I need to find my personal Red, or fight
someone to earn some street cred. LOL

I feel like you just insulted the prison food with Red at the table here mate...

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

cramcakes said:

Cythe said:

Second question: why are some girls like really big B's on this site? They are like hardcore mean to some girls ripping them apart. Granted I just read a post about from attention chick posting BFP's on the TTC boards, etc etc. I get that, but other times, and correct me if I'm wrong, it's like some girls pick just to pick. I just finished OITNB, and I feel like I need to find my personal Red, or fight
someone to earn some street cred. LOL
I feel like you just insulted the prison food with Red at the table here mate...

Someone's not eating. Ever.

I'm going to find some stuff to make a special lotion then. BRB.

Which had anyone finish season 2? I just finished last night, and I don't know what to do with my self.

mandi195 · June 2014

We finished season 2 last week. I need more. Now.

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

mandi195 said:

We finished season 2 last week. I need more. Now.

My DH at first was like "this theme song is pretty annoying" and on the last few episodes, I could see him playing air guitar in the kitchen. I was pretty content on how it ended. LOL

divinemsbee · June 2014

Cythe said:

@divinemsbee‌ thanks for dripping "sexpot" into the conversation!!

H gets sexpot me very few times a year. His birthday, our anniversary, sometimes my birthday, and after a holiday party where we both get squiffy. And maybe after I get a really cute haircut. Other than that, I wear a lot of sports bras.

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

cramcakes said:

Cythe said:

Second question: why are some girls like really big B's on this site? They are like hardcore mean to some girls ripping them apart. Granted I just read a post about from attention chick posting BFP's on the TTC boards, etc etc. I get that, but other times, and correct me if I'm wrong, it's like some girls pick just to pick. I just finished OITNB, and I feel like I need to find my personal Red, or fight
someone to earn some street cred. LOL
I feel like you just insulted the prison food with Red at the table here mate...

Someone's not eating. Ever.

Cythe · June 2014

divinemsbee said:

Cythe said:

@divinemsbee‌ thanks for dripping "sexpot" into the conversation!!

H gets sexpot me very few times a year. His birthday, our anniversary, sometimes my birthday, and after a holiday party where we both get squiffy. And maybe after I get a really cute haircut. Other than that, I wear a lot of sports bras.

**** mobile quoting pls ****

The sports bras are real in my house too. I actually put on a real bra yesterday and couldn't figure out why I was so uncomfortable when I got into bed.

I still had the bastard on.

chaysefaith · June 2014

@divinemsbee, I can top that and make you feel bad for my SO. I tell him "I'm cool with you jerking it and letting me hop on at the last minute."

Sometimes he gets stage fright, so whatever works...

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

LindsRockies said:

ChaoswithGrace said:

Second question: why are some girls like really big B's on this site? They are like hardcore mean to some girls ripping them apart. Granted I just read a post about from attention chick posting BFP's on the TTC boards, etc etc. I get that, but other times, and correct me if I'm wrong, it's like some girls pick just to pick. I just finished OITNB, and I feel like I need to find my personal Red, or fight
someone to earn some street cred. LOL

I'm so confused. Are you shitting where you're eating, or what?

Clearly a joke, I didn't mean to offend anyone. ^

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

SNLT1012 said:

@divinemsbee, I can top that and make you feel bad for my SO. I tell him "I'm cool with you jerking it and letting me hop on at the last minute."

Sometimes he gets stage fright, so whatever works...

LOL I've tried this. We're not clear on the timing of it - and it results in either my ass going over the side of the bed in a clear failure gymnastic move, or washing the bed sheets.

Cythe · June 2014

Okay OP, imma give you the run down. We like to have fun. We like to joke. We even like to get pretty inappropriate/weird. We usually don't do it all on our first day.

We also get called mean, rude, bitches, twats and whatever else randoms deem it necessary - on a daily basis.

We've also had a lot of WK's lately (white knights, people who appear out of no where to defend the poor, innocent and well, uneducated) so, are we offended? No. Annoyed? Probably.

Get a feel for us and you will be just fine.

mandi195 · June 2014

crazychickenlady · June 2014

ChaoswithGrace said:

Second question: why are some girls like really big B's on this site? They are like hardcore mean to some girls ripping them apart. Granted I just read a post about from attention chick posting BFP's on the TTC boards, etc etc. I get that, but other times, and correct me if I'm wrong, it's like some girls pick just to pick. I just finished OITNB, and I feel like I need to find my personal Red, or fight
someone to earn some street cred. LOL

Ok ~ This isn't going to go over well at all.

It is not about being "really big B's"... It is about the fact that the ladies here get asked the same question a hundred different ways daily - questions that are clearly answered in the newbie blog. And it gets frustrating. It gets made worse by the fact that sometimes, when the ladies here direct an OP of one of these frustrating questions to the newbie blog and/or gives helpful info and OP decides to insult the ladies on this board...

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

Totally understand, I used the nest board for a little while, and then joined a private board, so my fresh nature can be read wrong. Totally get it.

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

mrsberg9282014 said:

ChaoswithGrace said:

Second question: why are some girls like really big B's on this site? They are like hardcore mean to some girls ripping them apart. Granted I just read a post about from attention chick posting BFP's on the TTC boards, etc etc. I get that, but other times, and correct me if I'm wrong, it's like some girls pick just to pick. I just finished OITNB, and I feel like I need to find my personal Red, or fight
someone to earn some street cred. LOL

Ok ~ This isn't going to go over well at all.
It is not about being "really big B's"... It is about the fact that the ladies here get asked the same question a hundred different ways daily - questions that are clearly answered in the newbie blog. And it gets frustrating. It gets made worse by the fact that sometimes, when the ladies here direct an OP of one of these frustrating questions to the newbie blog and/or gives helpful info and OP decides to insult the ladies on this board...

Totally understand, I used the nest board for a little while, and then joined a private board, so my fresh nature can be read wrong. Totally get it.

mandi195 · June 2014

another helpful option...

mandi195 · June 2014

or this...

ChaoswithGrace · June 2014

mandi195 said:

or this...

HAHAHAHA That works. LOL

ToryKate · June 2014

ChaoswithGrace said:

Totally understand, I used the nest board for a little while, and then joined a private board, so my fresh nature can be read wrong. Totally get it.

Hey OP, maybe I'm one of the bitches, and I'm really not a frequent enough poster to be saying this, but the whole "sexy tango" thing is already old. We say sex here, no need for some cutesy name for it.

PuppyLove84 · June 2014

mandi195 said:

I just took this and sent it to my husband with the caption "tonight."

mandi195 · June 2014

PuppyLove84 said:

mandi195 said:

I just took this and sent it to my husband with the caption "tonight."

Bwahahahah! Glad I could help!

lilsneezy · June 2014

bibliothecary said:

LindsRockies said:

TTC sex sometimes is mechanical and not fun, it comes with the territory. I think wearing a sexy getup every time would get really old.

If it was me, I would just not tell my H that I'm fertile and have sex with him when I have the opportunity.

Is it bad that I start off Fertile Week with "let's get fuckin!"? Subtlety is not my strong suit.

^^ Same here. I'm very open about when it's time and not too worried about it being fun. I mean, we try to make it fun but sometimes it just is what it is. Today I walked into the bedroom and he said "do you need my weiner?" Why yes, DH, I do.

Ladymouse · June 2014

Yeah, there's some snark on the Bump, but I'd rather have snark than bad information due to no one wanting to offend.

mandi195 · June 2014

lilsneezy said:

bibliothecary said:

LindsRockies said:

TTC sex sometimes is mechanical and not fun, it comes with the territory. I think wearing a sexy getup every time would get really old.

If it was me, I would just not tell my H that I'm fertile and have sex with him when I have the opportunity.

Is it bad that I start off Fertile Week with "let's get fuckin!"? Subtlety is not my strong suit.

^^ Same here. I'm very open about when it's time and not too worried about it being fun. I mean, we try to make it fun but sometimes it just is what it is. Today I walked into the bedroom and he said "do you need my weiner?" Why yes, DH, I do.

Sounds like my DH...

notthefather · June 2014

LindsRockies said:

ChaoswithGrace said:

Second question: why are some girls like really big B's on this site? They are like hardcore mean to some girls ripping them apart. Granted I just read a post about from attention chick posting BFP's on the TTC boards, etc etc. I get that, but other times, and correct me if I'm wrong, it's like some girls pick just to pick. I just finished OITNB, and I feel like I need to find my personal Red, or fight
someone to earn some street cred. LOL

I'm so confused. Are you shitting where you're eating, or what?

Thank you! I'm still new here so I didn't want to be the one to say something, but, really?

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