nwmr- Buying toys "just because"

mlee116 · June 2014

How often do you buy your LO(s) toys just because? We hardly ever buy DS toys other than his birthday and Christmas and occasionally like a $2.00 ball or bubbles. I want to get him something (nothing major), but I know DH will probably make some comment about him having more than enough toys and its probably true, but a treat every once in awhile won't hurt, right? Just curious what others do...

bcnoelle · June 2014

My son is three and I'm trying to cut back on 'just because' toys but I did save quite a few birthday toys and had him open them weeks later. Also, he got a little sister last month and got a present 'from her' and has gotten presents from friends, I also am bad and bribe him with good potty training skills, We made a chart with stars and he worked up to a present. The good thing is that he loves the dollar store and is easily entertained by cheap presents, what I don't let him do is beg for the random toys hanging in aisles at the grocery store.

MommaP12 · June 2014

Maybe once a year if that. The grandparents pretty much bring something every time they visit so they are constantly getting stuff just because.

SoMoNY · June 2014

If something catches my eye I'll get it for him, I don't have any hard set rules about when he can/can't get a new toy,

I have an Amazon prime account so I probably buy more than I need to but I can say that he does play with each and every toy he has.

glaw · June 2014

I'm guilty of buying DD a lot of "just because" toys but she's 1.5 and doesn't get it yet. It's also me shopping by myself so not giving in to her demanding a toy. I feel like I'm still at a point where she needs new/more developmental toys. Recently I've bought her several puzzles that we are working on and some larger Lego type blocks to help with hand eye coordination. I'll also buy her books when I see good ones. But I do lost of my shopping at places like Ross and Marshall's. Ross especially has great toys like Melissa and Doug for super cheap which makes me feel better. But when she gets older and understands more I definitely plan to limit buying her toys. Part of it is honestly the mommy guilt - like if I'm working then I should and can buy her toys. I love seeing her light up when I come home from work with a new toy I bought during my lunch break.

MamaAllison · June 2014

I buy my kid stuff all the time and so does my mom. It's usually little stuff like crafts or Melissa & Doug puzzles, but it's nice to have something new

fitmom82 · June 2014

I feel bad now, maybe once a year I'll buy DD, she was 4 in March, a toy, and I haven't done it for DS, who was 2 last month, yet other than birthdays, Christmas, and a few small things for Easter. I just bought DD a Monster High doll as an end of the school year treat because she's been talking about it being on her Christmas list for the past 2 months.

Maybe because they're not used to getting toys just because, I can say DD is the best window shopper and DS is getting there. I never hesitate to take them to a toy store or gift shop. We can go in, look around, admire how cute something is, and leave with nothing and without a problem.

skibunny59 · June 2014

We rarely do "just because" toys. DH and I usually just buy her toys for her birthday, christmas, or easter. Between both grandparents she gets tons of stuff.

When we do buy her something it is usually something she "needs" and we treat it as a special surprise/treat for her. ie. She is starting swim lessons soon and I bought her a Minnie beach towel since we have a shortage of towels at our house and she will need something for the pool and the beach. She was ecstatic.

groovygrl · June 2014

I tend to do them more as 'rewards' for things or for special days out w/ mom or dad, etc but never big expensive toys, I save those for bday & Xmas. Like someone else said, my DS is very into legos, it started just before xmas and if I had refused to buy him any more than the small amt he got at xmas it would have sort of sucked...he has improved so much in 6 months with his creativity & using them & understanding different ways they can be put together b/c I get him new sets periodically. But also like someone else said I don't typically buy much in the month or two before bday or Xmas. I also don't buy just b/c they ask for something, in fact if they beg or really get on me about buying them something I usually dig my heels in & won't do it, vs getting them a little surprise or something nice b/c they earned stars on their chart or did well at something that we've been working on, etc.

thedash · June 2014

OK I feel awful after reading these replies. I buy DS toys for no reason all the time. If it doesn't cost much and I think he will actually play with it I get it. Often it's something really small (the butterfly catching net from the dollar section at Target was a hit!) but it probably happens 1-2 times per month. Although we are definitely drowning in toys around here so I guess that's why.

rodiesmum · June 2014

Im guilty pf buying just because cheap toys. I use it when im happy abt her cooperating re URine tests. Etc.

Mustardseed2007 · June 2014

I would say I periodically do-like we just bought ds a trike bc it's summer and he didn't have one. He has a December 12 birthday so we actually try to limit birthday and Christmas presents to 3 each. He gets so many gifts that month from various sources, it's unreal.

Samiantha101 · June 2014

It's become way too frequent. I would say weekly, between my husband and I. To be fair, we don't have much family, so she is only being spoiled by us. But still, I think it needs to be cut back.

ccam · June 2014

I won't buy any big toys unless it's for a birthday or Christmas, but I will occasionally pick up a new ball, coloring book, matchbox cars.... little things like that. Every time my parents visit they come bearing gifts so DS gets plenty of new toys!

mlee116 · June 2014

skibunny59 said:

We rarely do "just because" toys. DH and I usually just buy her toys for her birthday, christmas, or easter. Between both grandparents she gets tons of stuff.

When we do buy her something it is usually something she "needs" and we treat it as a special surprise/treat for her. ie. She is starting swim lessons soon and I bought her a Minnie beach towel since we have a shortage of towels at our house and she will need something for the pool and the beach. She was ecstatic.

See this is what we do (re: the things he "needs" and treating it as a surprise). And he's always excited about those things. Plus, he gets a ton of stuff at Christmas from our large families, friends and people at church so he really does have a good amount of toys. Since his birthday is in Feb., it does seem like there's a big gap between that and Christmas.

Maybe I will just get him a few toys that are better than dollar store but not big.

Pips09 · June 2014

Almost never. Maybe once a year? But we have a July birthday, so she gets a new influx of toys every six months anyway.

glaw · June 2014

I should add that we don't celebrate Christmas really so she might only get one gift from us. Also our parents don't bring her gifts all the time. Mine live in town and see her a lot - they don't bring gifts every week that would be weird. And my in laws bring clothes usually. So I like to buy her things whenever I see smthg developmentally appropriate or that I think she'd enjoy.

I don't understand all the comments about feeling guilty. On either side - those that buy more or less. If it's working for you and your family it's all good!

Leap08 · June 2014

Both of my girls' birthdays are within a month of Christmas, so essentially they'd only get new stuff once a year if we only did birthdays and Christmas. I buy little things for them here and there just because - like coloring books, books, sidewalk chalk, bubbles. But I don't really like the idea of giving them bigger toys for no reason. We recently started doing sticker charts to reward good behavior at home, and when they have earned a certain number of stickers they get a prize (toy). I'm pretty happy with this solution. They have to do something to get the toy, but then they also get new toys throughout the year.

Xtine22 · June 2014

Yes, but DD's birthday is 2 weeks before Christmas. Thankfully she is over joyed with picking something out of the dollar section at Target. So it usually isn't anything that expensive.

dashofreality · June 2014

fitmom82 said:

I feel bad now, maybe once a year I'll buy DD, she was 4 in March, a toy, and I haven't done it for DS, who was 2 last month, yet other than birthdays, Christmas, and a few small things for Easter. I just bought DD a Monster High doll as an end of the school year treat because she's been talking about it being on her Christmas list for the past 2 months.

Maybe because they're not used to getting toys just because, I can say DD is the best window shopper and DS is getting there. I never hesitate to take them to a toy store or gift shop. We can go in, look around, admire how cute something is, and leave with nothing and without a problem.

There is no reason to feel bad at all.

This did remind me, I have never bought a toy for the kids when they were actually with me in the store. So my kids have never asked for anything at the store and we can play in the toy aisle and leave. But yes, I buy my kids things occasionally throughout the year when they start to show interest in something or it becomes developmentally appropriate. DD isn't into toys, but she loves socks and I will bring them home occasionally.

ss+el · June 2014

With his birthday so close to Christmas, I hate to make him go so much of the year without anything new, and there are only so many summer things out by Easter, so if I find a seasonal toy I think I should buy him, I make him "earn" it, even if I have to make up a task for him.

MommyAtty · June 2014

All. The. Time. Seriously. We are awful. And it's mainly me and DH, not DD. She will ask, and she takes the answer no very well. But occasionally she will really dig in about wanting something. And when she does, that toy really IS a long-term favorite. Mostly she digs in about stuffed toys that go with books. She has a Llama Llama and a Pete the Cat. Also, Dora and Boots.

KayteeGee · June 2014

SandAndsSea said:

Oh, and we do have a surprise bag that we're using now filled with $1 toys from the dollar spot at target. He earns them by going poo poo on the potty and by staying in his bed all night. We have resorted to bribery for these two things and it's working.

Oh this is us too.. only ours is full of diecast cars and trains (that I pick up at the consignment store! but still)....

I'm horrible. DS has a TON of toys and I get him a ton all the time for no reason. It's awful, I know it is.... I have to break the habit, but I love shopping and I love his reactions... it's not good... not good at all....

Tink112011 · June 2014

We do not buy "just because" toys. Hardly ever. I really can't recall a "just because" toy in recent history.

DS's birthday is November, and although its close the Christmas, that is not a problem for us. He needs more toys in the winter time when we spend all our time indoors.

We use Easter as the occasion to buy a few new summer toys (this year he got a balance bike and sidewalk chalk).

Oh, now I recall. I did buy a sandbox off of Craig's list last month. Maybe that counts. But I filled it with buckets, shovels, and toys that he already had.

rubber_chicken · June 2014

Oof. I buy DD "just because" stuff all.the.time. I should really cut back, we're swimming in toys and now that it's summer we're hardly ever home to play with them.

DD is only 2, and she'll ask for things at the store but always accepts "no" as an answer. It's totally coming from me and my husband. I need to do what my SIL does, and pack away half the toys out of sight so I can start rotating through them all.

Katelobster · June 2014

I've cut back a lot now that she's 2 and toys are lasting longer and her room is becoming overrun with toys.

But my mom has kept literally every toy and book I owned from babyhood onward, so many trips to her house end up with me taking something home. DD loves her 1980s Sesame Street puzzles and her Cabbage Patch nursery...

cedenton · June 2014

SoMoNY said:

If something catches my eye I'll get it for him, I don't have any hard set rules about when he can/can't get a new toy,

I have an Amazon prime account so I probably buy more than I need to but I can say that he does play with each and every toy he has.

This except he DOESN'T play with a lot of his toys except right after he gets them. Therefore, I've stopped buying toys as often. He prefers things like screwdrivers, keys and remote controls. LOL

Thankfully I bought/buy most of his toys second hand or he gets them as gifts.

MickeyM04 · June 2014

I buy DS stuff all the time. But not so much toys as books, DVDs, crayons and stickers, etc. We were really bad for awhile with the toys but then we were just inundated with them and I thought we should slow down. DS got a ton of stuff for his birthday in April and yesterday was the first toy I bought him since then. But in that two month span I bought him a couple Disney movies, a couple board books, some crayons and paper (he likes coloring), and bubbles. So I am pretty bad. But when he's a good boy I like to get him stuff. He's been such an angel on my maternity leave and so good with his baby sister that it's hard for me to see something I know he will like and not get it for him.

I rarely spend money on myself so that's how I justify it. I think since he was born I've bought two pairs of shoes and clothes because I didn't fit into stuff when I went back to work with DS. So I spend it on him instead. Also he's not quite old enough to be spoiled yet I don't think. Like he RARELY asks for something when we go shopping so clearly my over buying isn't making him feel entitled. That's what I tell myself anyway.

cecilyandgautam · June 2014

We try to keep a variety of materials DD can explore on her own and it's part of how we stay sane - DD can occupy herself for 20 minutes at a time with an art project, a puzzle, a challenging activity,etc. Just straight up toys, like blocks or dolls, don't keep her attention for so long, so we just let whatever the grandparents send be it in that regard. But we do frequently update the other kinds of materials ourselves - art supplies, educational materials, etc. I have a book of fun and educational activities to do with your preschooler at home, so I periodically check that to see what we haven't tried yet that she might be ready for, and I get ideas from montessori at home blogs. A lot of these activities don't require a new purchase, but it is a new activity/game for DD to do - so not sure if that's the kind of thing you're asking about, but we try to keep that stuff fresh because it makes home life much more enjoyable for everyone.

traveltheworld · June 2014

I buy DS something every few months. He doesn't really get presents for Christmas or his bday from our families so I feel it's fine for me to get him something from time to time. I'm obsessed with getting him books though. I get him a new one probably every week. He loves books.

emberlee3 · June 2014

I try not to buy toys for no reason. I replenish arts and craft supplies, Play-doh, etc. when needed. DH buys stuff all the time. We just finished our vacation, and I let each child pick one souvenir. It was very fun to tell them they could choose something. I think it's more special if it's rare.

Unknown · June 2014

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fancynewbeesly · June 2014

My DH and I struggle with that. Actually we were good about it---really good and just replenished art supplies/books when needed, but then DD got sick and we have been in and out of the hospital--and with MANY hospital stays and doctors appointments, it is REALLY hard for us not to buy her something. Especially since the days are fairly long, and we are always looking for new toys/movies, etc to keep her occupied. But I know our situation is completely unique and not the typical situation.

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