Attachment Parenting
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intro/nursing to sleep
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Hi there! I'm a long time lurker of this board, first time poster (I think). Before having DS, I knew very very little about AP. Without realizing it, a lot of what I do for/with him is AP. It just happens to be what feels to be right for us.
One thing that I do (not sure if it's part of AP) which I get a lot of slack for, is I nurse LO to sleep. At first it was that he had a difficult time staying awake during feedings when he was so little, then it became the easiest way for me to help him to sleep, now it's an activity I really enjoy. I know that I'm building a bad habit and I risk LO needing to nurse to sleep all the time with me (DH and other family members can get him to sleep by rocking). I'm just not sure if it's something we should work at stopping and what's the best approach would be.
Will you talk to me about your experience with nursing LO to sleep? Did it become a problem later on? How did you break this habit? TIA!
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Re: intro/nursing to sleep
your LO is so little, i wouldn't worry about it at this point. i think the best thing to do is let other people have the opportunity to put your LO to sleep sometimes, which it sounds like you're doing, so that's great. i think it can be problematic if you are the only person who can get your LO to sleep. but if your DH or other family members can get him to sleep, too, and have their own techniques for it, then what is the problem if your technique for getting him to sleep is nursing? it is a totally natural thing for a baby to want to fall asleep at mama's breast, that is the most comforting place for them to be.
my advice would be to just keep up with letting other people put your LO down for naps or bedtime if possible- even if it's only once in a while. then at least you have the option of going out at night, or just getting a break from the routine. eventually, when your LO is older, you could try to introduce other ways that you put him to sleep- you can not nurse immediately before bed, and instead try rocking, music, stories, or whatever else works to get him to sleep. then nursing becomes just a part of your whole nighttime routine.
i personally always took the past of least resistance RE getting our DS to sleep. at 22 months, i still often nurse him to sleep for naps, and sometimes he nurses directly to sleep at night. there have been phases where DH always put him to sleep, and phases where only i could get him to go to sleep via nursing, and phases where both of us can get him to sleep. but, it never bothered me to the point where i felt it was a habit that had to be broken.
TL;DR: there's nothing inherently wrong with nursing to sleep. if at some point it's not working for you anymore, then change it. now, with a 3-month-old, i totally wouldn't sweat it.
Like you, he never had a problem letting other people put him to sleep (DH, grandma, babysitters). From 6 weeks-6 months, DH was in charge of bedtime every night. My son would just as easily fall asleep with DH and no nursing as he did with me. We went back to me nursing at nights when I returned to work at 6 months until he was 21 months old. At that time, I wanted to cut out the night nursing, and so DH returned to doing bedtime. And it was just as easy as that, one in, one out.
So don't worry about nursing to sleep at 3 months. You're not causing any bad habits. You're not doing any harm. Continue for as long as you want. It won't last forever. At 2.5 years I wish it were as easy to get him to sleep as it was when I could pop a breast out!
"It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness." - Eleanor Roosevelt