Poll: Thinking about how we share when we are struggling or need to vent.

ronniesgirl1981 · June 2014

I’ve been thinking about this lately and I have a suggestion. How about a “check in” post of sorts titled, “I’m struggling…”? It would serve as an open invitation to chat about whatever it is that you are struggling with. Sometimes a comment, a pregnancy announcement, or a tough IF day leave us struggling and we just need to say it. For me, it’s the only way I’m going to move past it.

At the same time, I don’t like feeling like an AW by making my own separate post about it.

Alternatively, it could be an “OMC” Post for “off my chest.”

So this could be a weekly check-in for just a vent or a random, open invitation for others to share her vents in the same thread. Meaning that anyone, at any time could start an OMC thread or join an existing thread.

ronniesgirl1981 · June 2014

I actually kind of like the random OMC thread that anyone can start or join.

ronniesgirl1981 · June 2014

And I like making up acronyms.

Mozzarella13 · June 2014

I love this idea! I'm like you @ronniesgirl1981‌ sometimes I need a helping hand and I'm really bad at asking for help cause I feel like an AW--I know this is a safe place to talk, it's just my insecurity!

ronniesgirl1981 · June 2014

@CaterinaC Good question. I do think there is some crossover. But, with an OMC thread, you don't have to wait until Thursday. And, for example, I am having a week of pregnancy announcements. These are lovely ladies and I do not want to TP them, but I'm struggling and I just need to get it off my chest.

Think about the "vent" posts that are commonplace here....that is more the type of post I'm thinking about.

kushie77 · June 2014

LIke a Flame Free confession post, where we just air something out and no judging allowed?

ronniesgirl1981 · June 2014

Yes @Kushie77!

theholmanherd · June 2014

CaterinaC said:

So I am not saying that I don't like the idea, but isn't Thursday TP thread pretty much the same thing?

I think TPT is more angry/venting. I think ronnie's suggesting a less humorous, let's all love each other type post. I realize that sounds sarcastic, but I think this could be a good idea. The idea being that instead of getting angry, we can actually let the sadz out and get advice without starting individual threads every time one of us has something terrible happen.

Mozzarella13 · June 2014

@theholmanherd‌ this exactly!! It's more like a call for support/prayers than a call for a friend to hold my purse while I deliver a TP

ronniesgirl1981 · June 2014

@Mozzarella13 summed it up much better than I.

Pintobean39 · June 2014

I think it's an awesome idea! Some days I just need to vent but I'm with @Mozzarella13‌ I feel like I'm being an AW. I have one now but I can't gather my thoughts yet. Damn alcohol!!

wishiwaspreggo · June 2014

Love it! I want to vent right now but I don't want to be an AW. I'm basically going slowly insane from hunger. Raging, raging hunger. Every time I eat something it's almost like I hadn't tasted food until that moment. It sounds ridiculous but it's absolutely maddening.

Ugh, I've been looking at images of buffet spreads on Google. I need an intervention.

If anyone has any advice on how they deal with this I'd appreciate it. I literally cannot think about anything right now except for the giant, steaming bowl of pasta I'm going to prepare for dinner the second I'm able to get my hands on the ingredients.

Pintobean39 · June 2014

@wishiwaspreggo‌ I vote eat!!!! Eat everything you want because you deserve it!!!

Pintobean39 · June 2014

**** pregnancy and loss mentioned****

Alright so I'm gathering my thoughts!!!

Sunday is my 40th bday and a friend invited me to go to a concert sat night and stay at a hotel. Thing is a girl that has been a bitch to me all last year through my surgery, pregnancies, and miscarriages is going. Well she's now 25weeks pregnant and so far I've distanced myself from her because she's still an insensitive narcissistic bitch and plan on continuing to do so. My husband is working for my birthday so we have no other plans. So I'm seriously thinking I'm just going to respectfully decline and spend the day by myself. I'd honestly rather do that than spend it with her rubbing her belly and talking about her pregnancy. What PISSES me off is that my friend that invited me knows how I feel about this girl. Also, she didn't invite me until yesterday and I've always hosted everyone's bdays celebrations and this year no ones hosting mine and I feel wrong about planning my own. I understand the IVF has thrown a wrench in it all but seriously, they are all going to this concert. I'm deaf in my left ear thanks to Ménière's, loud music hurts my head and they all know this. To top it off Monday is the anniversary of the day I found out my first baby girl no longer had a heart beat.

I'm going to have my own pity party this weekend.

wishiwaspreggo · June 2014

@Pintobean39 - Dude. This definitely deserves an AW post, in my opinion. Me bitching about progesterone-fueled munchies: not so much

If I were in your shoes, I wouldn't go. Fuck it all. I am so done dealing with people who make me feel bad. I have no time or energy to handle negativity. Hell, this is your 40th birthday! You deserve to do something awesome! I'd plan a day of doing absolutely anything I wanted. A spa may be included, as well as a nice lunch out with a good book, but that's just me.

I'm so sorry you have to deal with that. Smug, pregnant bitches suck.

Pintobean39 · June 2014

That's @wishiwaspreggo‌ and your bitching about progesterone is definitely not an aw. That crap makes you nuts!!!

I honestly just want to lay in my pool all day and drink with my bloated ass self.

ETA: I think the bloat may make me float better. :-)

theholmanherd · June 2014

wishiwaspreggo said:

@Pintobean39 - Dude. This definitely deserves an AW post, in my opinion. Me bitching about progesterone-fueled munchies: not so much

If I were in your shoes, I wouldn't go. Fuck it all. I am so done dealing with people who make me feel bad. I have no time or energy to handle negativity. Hell, this is your 40th birthday! You deserve to do something awesome! I'd plan a day of doing absolutely anything I wanted. A spa may be included, as well as a nice lunch out with a good book, but that's just me.

I'm so sorry you have to deal with that. Smug, pregnant bitches suck.

I second all of this. Do what makes you happy this weekend!

.Mrs.Matt. · June 2014

I'm in! I often want to post about frustrations, but like others said - don't want to be an AW! I'm struggling today with my inability to be open about our IF. I had lunch with a good friend today, and just couldn't get myself to bring it up. I feel like a jerk, since I know she would be disappointed to know I'd kept it from her

KT416 · June 2014

@Pintobean39 Happy (early) Birthday! I would definitely not feel bad celebrating and having the day to yourself. Go to the spa or just hang out at the pool all day or whatever you feel like doing. I spent one birthday watching chicks flicks the entire day because my DH was out of state. Definitely hanging out with someone you don't like isn't a great way to spend your big day!

Mozzarella13 · June 2014

@Pintobean39‌ I'm thinking of that song, it's my party and I'll cry if I want to! You do whatever the heck makes you happy cause it's your bday!! I think that pool idea sounds amazingB-)
@wishiwaspreggo‌ I'm about to go get my Ben & Jerry's peanut butter cup ice cream...can you tell I feel your pain ?
ETA: I'm moving my OMC to the inaugural thread

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Poll: Thinking about how we share when we are struggling or need to vent.

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March 2014 - RE appt.
April 2014- Saline sono all's good, terrible SA results - 8 sperm found all abnormal
May 2014- Fert Urology- Bilateral varicoceles, recommend Donor Sperm

12/2014- Surprise natural BFP EDD 7/31/15 Plan: Starting foster to adoption, natural cycles

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Want a personalized experience?

Poll: Thinking about how we share when we are struggling or need to vent.

Poll: Thinking about how we share when we are struggling or need to vent. 56 votes

Re: Poll: Thinking about how we share when we are struggling or need to vent.

March 2014 - RE appt. April 2014- Saline sono all's good, terrible SA results - 8 sperm found all abnormalMay 2014- Fert Urology- Bilateral varicoceles, recommend Donor Sperm

12/2014- Surprise natural BFP EDD 7/31/15 Plan: Starting foster to adoption, natural cycles

Choose Another Board

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March 2014 - RE appt.
April 2014- Saline sono all's good, terrible SA results - 8 sperm found all abnormal
May 2014- Fert Urology- Bilateral varicoceles, recommend Donor Sperm