I just had my baby 2 1/2 weeks ago. Since then I've been suffering from what I think is severe post partum depression and I don't know what to do. I feel completely detached from the baby, like there is no way I am his mother. I don't like holding him. When I'm feeling especially bad I can't even look at him without feeling sick. I get really bad anxiety attacks where I beg my husband to let me put him up for adoption. It's so horrible, I am embarrassed to write this. I feel like I will always feel bad and won't ever be abel to take care of him myself. I barely have an appetite and have lost my pregnant weight very quickly (already almost back to my original weight). My husband has been the main caregiver as he's been home, but will go back to work soon. I am petrified of taking care of the baby myself, and I don't think I can do it without having a nervous breakdown. I've reached out a lot for help- but so far nothing is getting better. I went ot the ER twice and they could only suggest 5 day inpatient which I didn't want to do. I've been to 2 therapists, the one that was pretty decent isnt' covered by insurance so I can't afford to go back. The best thing was that I went to my OB and she prescribed a low dose of Zoloft. I've been taking it just under a week and don't feel better at all. She said it will take at least a couple weeks, but I don't feel like it will help.. and how do I cope until then? Is it possible that this is just me and not a depression? That I just never should have had a baby and I will always feel like this? What If I just wasn't meant to be a parent?