Being a mom is hard yo! Wtf do I do questions

jshrop · June 2014

Good lord this shiznit is tough! I don't know about anyone else but I've had about 6,000,000 questions in the past 16 days. So I'm going to post some of them here, please feel free to add to it if you'd like!

MrsCase1 · June 2014

It IS hard. Be sure and extend yourself some grace, friend!

CJnKR2014 · June 2014

My question: how am I supposed to sleep?!? Cuz sleeping when they do isnt working x( and I keep dozing off while pumping. ugh.

Edit bc sleep deprivation + words = fhvfsikkoo

jshrop · June 2014

First couple:

1. How often should I expect "growth spurts?" I have been trying to get LO on a schedule for feedings per her pediatrician recommendation (every 2.5 hrs from time you finish). She has been super fussy for the past 24 hours. Pretty sure it's gas but thinking maybe it's a growth spurt? The only thing that calms her is nursing and she is constantly rooting.

2. For the first 6-10 days I remember the lc saying 1 pee and 1 poop diaper per day alive (ie, 5 days old= 5 poo & 5 pee diapes). How many should she be having now?

3. How do you know if the diapers are too small and time to move to the next size? (This seems silly, but I can still fit the newborn diapers on her but not sure if they're too small).

Thanks!

jshrop · June 2014

CJnKR2014 said:
My question: how am I supposed to sleep?!? Cuz sleeping when they do isnt working x(

I second this question. I had a sob fest this afternoon bc I'm so tired.... So now I'm even more tired and can't sleep bc she's super fussy

k318 · June 2014

@CJnKR2014‌ sleep is hard the first couple of weeks/month. Take turns with h if possible, get someone to watch the baby so you can rest. Honestly, it does get better or you just get used to it but sleep with newborn sucks.

@jshrop it's time to move to the next size diaper when they start leaking. At least that's how I did it. The weight on the package isn't always accurate. Make sure u have a good seal around the legs and no gap from the tab to where you stick it on the front of the diaper.

As for growth spurts, every baby is different. I found that trying to put baby on a schedule didn't work.. I just kinda fed and stuff on demand, wrote it down for a few days and noticed my baby's own pattern. After doing that, I was better able to anticipate his needs and things got easier.

CJnKR2014 · June 2014

jshrop said:
First couple:

1. How often should I expect "growth spurts?" I have been trying to get LO on a schedule for feedings per her pediatrician recommendation (every 2.5 hrs from time you finish). She has been super fussy for the past 24 hours. Pretty sure it's gas but thinking maybe it's a growth spurt? The only thing that calms her is nursing and she is constantly rooting.

2. For the first 6-10 days I remember the lc saying 1 pee and 1 poop diaper per day alive (ie, 5 days old= 5 poo & 5 pee diapes). How many should she be having now?

3. How do you know if the diapers are too small and time to move to the next size? (This seems silly, but I can still fit the newborn diapers on her but not sure if they're too small).

Thanks!

#1: this one I have no idea about

#2: i think after that it's just more or less as long as baby is still having regular bm's and pees, they should be ok- i dont think.there's a set number after that
#3: again idk, but I'd deff like to know the answer to this lol

tbmadeamistake · June 2014

Sleep-hand the baby to your SO the second you have finished a good feeding. Leave instructions for how baby soothes for you best, go and take a nap. Doesn't matter what time of day, doesn't matter how long, just make it happen. Hell, call the next door neighbor to do it if you have to. I find that Charlie will sleep better if laying on someone warm, so when I need sleep, i lay him out dh, tell dh not to fucking move, and I get three hours usually.

Growth spurts-pretty sure this is google-able, but generally at a couple days, three weeks, six weeks, two months, three months, and then they start spacing out more
That said, every baby is different, so yours might be special and do it more or less often. Drink a white ton, hunker down at home if you can, keep the lanolin and ice on hand, and become one with being the food supply. Baby is upping your supply, the more often you can let them nurse, the faster that will happen.

Diapers- 8-12 a day is what a newborn should settle in to. I'm not sure how many of those are supposed to be poop, though, all of them should be wet.

Diaper size-partly the fit, and partly the peeing/pooping out of the little diaper.

Eta @jshrop‌ amd @CJnKR2014‌

tummommy · June 2014

I have no idea how many growth spurts, but DD went through several phases where nursing was an all day / night thing. I just went with it and it calmed us both down.
I change diaper size when they leak or won't wrap around securely, whichever is most inconvenient

jshrop · June 2014

Have I ever told you all how much I freaking love you? Seriously! Love (in the creepy internet way)

ncbelle · June 2014

jshrop are you breastfeeding? If so, you definitely don't want to schedule feedings (I'd argue that you shouldn't with FF either but with BF it's more important because of the supply/demand nature of production). Babies will settle into a routine but right now there's really no rhyme or reason - you just roll with it! Nursing on demand will build a strong supply and healthy baby. And definitely there will be times when baby wants/needs to nurse way more than every 2.5 hours. I don't really think about "when" growth spurts happen - just that they do. As long as you always nurse on demand, baby will get what baby needs.

It really does get way easier - promise

elsa1688 · June 2014

How do I not fall asleep during motn feedings??

kimmyberly26 · June 2014

Growth spurts-I've heard a few moms rave about the wonder weeks app. I haven't downloaded it but it supposedly gives you an insist to babies development and what is coming up next.

Diapers-about 8-12 a day. My book I got at the hospital had 2 poops a day and 6 pees.

courtneyjean1980 · June 2014

Re: feedings, every 2.5 hours from the time you finish a feeding is a long time to go. Usually it's recommended to time it from the time you begin a feeding. During the day I wake this baby up every two hours (from the start of one feeding to the start of another) and feed on demand if she's acting hungry before the 2 hour mark. At night, I don't wake her up and I pump if it becomes uncomfortable for me. I want to encourage her to eat during the day and rest at night. So far it's working, but I think it's because it's baby #2. My son was a round the clock nurser.

Re: growth spurts, I second the PP who recommended the wonder weeks. It was very accurate for my son.

Re: your sleep, I prioritize it above all else. Laundry might pile up, birth announcements might go out at the 6 month mark, but it's so crucial to get some sleep.

courtneyjean1980 · June 2014

@shannonliggett‌: baby acne is really common in the early months, I think it's the hormones from birth that cause it. It should clear up on its own. Don't wash it too often, it can aggravate it further.

MollySm · June 2014

elsa1688 said:

How do I not fall asleep during motn feedings??

@elsa1688 - It's hard! Find a good tv show to watch? I found that I did better just getting up and being up in a chair in the living room, rather than trying to stay in bed to do it for the first month or 2 until I was getting longer stretches of sleep. If I stayed in bed, it was so hard to keep my eyes open. Another option is to have your SO get up with you, and talk to you so that you both stay awake.

jshrop · June 2014

@ncbelle‌ I am EBF. I don't know if he recommended the schedule because she gained a pound already since we left the hospital? She was 6lb14oz when we left and 7 lb 14 oz at 12 days (7lb 4oz at birth). I will go back to on demand feeding because she seems so miserable.

rainbowdashh · June 2014

jshrop said:
@ncbelle‌ I am EBF. I don't know if he recommended the schedule because she gained a pound already since we left the hospital? She was 6lb14oz when we left and 7 lb 14 oz at 12 days (7lb 4oz at birth). I will go back to on demand feeding because she seems so miserable.

I was always told to feed on demand. DD gained weight really fast, too. I was just told to keep doing what I was doing!

About not falling asleep during feedings- find a TV show to watch. Or a game? I picked up a candy crush habit during the first couple months.

tbmadeamistake · June 2014

Definitely feed on demand at this point. Motn feedings are hard initially. With C I would read my nook. As long as I had a screen on I was good.

iris427 · June 2014

Pee diapers are more important than poop diapers. Some babies will poop 4 times a day, some will poop once a day, some will go days without pooping and be completely fine. Peeing is a more important and reliable indicator that the baby is getting enough milk. You can always call the nurse line at your pedi's office to ask about the number of wet diapers you should be getting. I called all the time with questions when my first was born--that's what they're there for!

I never knew how many growth spurts a baby should have or when they have them--if my baby seemed to want to nurse more than usual for a few days, I just went with it. They know when they're hungry better than a clock or a calendar. That said, those days when it feels like all you do is feed your kid are tough--hang in there, binge watch some TV, go online, catch up on trashy novels, and remember that this will pass soon.

I go up a diaper size when the tabs start getting hard to pull past their hips.

kimmyberly26 · June 2014

Oh yeah, I forgot about playing games. I was playing a scrabble one for DD#1. DH worked nights so him and his buddies would keep me occupied during the motn feedings.

ChristineBaker23 · June 2014

I change a diaper with every feeding at least and there is usually pee and poop involved. So that would put mine between 8 and 15 a day. As long as they are having wet diapers regularly they should be fine.

Feeding in demand - (this is based solely on personal experience with breastfeeding) this method should come with some warnings. Learn the difference between nursing for comfort and nursing for hunger. If you're baby wants to do nothing but suck every ten minutes they are probably using you as a pacifier. When feeding on demand you should still be on a "schedule" just a flexible one. For instance, my daughter right now is nursing every 3 hours roughly during the day and every four at night. If I have just fed her and it was a good feeding and an hour later she is fussing I try to calm her other ways besides nursing before I feed her again. Usually she will go back to sleep without needing to nurse because she is not actually hungry. If she is hungry she will not calm back down and I will nurse her, if she is early it usually ends up being a 5-10 minute snack. With my first I fed on demand and it was time consuming and frustrating and I ended up over feeding and she became a projectile puker. Once I started sticking to a loose "schedule" it was much better.

MOTN feeding - side lying nursing. Lay down, hook up baby on the side touching the bed and catch a catnap. Set an alarm if you're worried you will really conk out. Don't stress about it too much either, just make sure you're not in a position to drop baby and you'll be fine. I doze off all the time and did with first too, she's about to be three so I don't think it hurt her too much

Diapers - if they start leaking or they just don't seem to fit right just try a size up. It's all trial and error.

flerlgirl · June 2014

elsa1688 said:

How do I not fall asleep during motn feedings??

Drink some water, turn on a lamp, watch some TV! If you are still nodding off maybe try to take off any of your blankets to keep you a little cooler. I try to make myself comfy but not so comfy that I fall asleep easier.

SarahS11 · June 2014

A while ago in a different thread I asked about spitting up however... Last night and just now, my LO definitely projectiled what looked like her entire meal... She's gets kind of fussy and then out it all comes. I have no idea what to do. Do I call her pediatrician? I have an appt Wednesday. Do I just wait? In between these two episodes, she just had little spit ups and eats fine, enough wet diapers, but it's just scary to see her throw up like that. What would you do?

elsa1688 · June 2014

Thanks for all the tips. Hopefully being home and able to move around more will help (vs. a hospital room where I was trying not to wake up DF)

JulieSmiles · June 2014

How do I keep my LO from falling asleep during feelings? She will eat for 5 minutes or less a lot of times and then fall fast asleep. Not much has worked to keep her awake/ wake her. Suggestions?

CJnKR2014 · June 2014

JulieSmiles said:
How do I keep my LO from falling asleep during feelings? She will eat for 5 minutes or less a lot of times and then fall fast asleep. Not much has worked to keep her awake/ wake her. Suggestions?

This^

Hairstylist16 · June 2014

SarahS11 said:
A while ago in a different thread I asked about spitting up however... Last night and just now, my LO definitely projectiled what looked like her entire meal... She's gets kind of fussy and then out it all comes. I have no idea what to do. Do I call her pediatrician? I have an appt Wednesday. Do I just wait? In between these two episodes, she just had little spit ups and eats fine, enough wet diapers, but it's just scary to see her throw up like that. What would you do?

I would call the ped and ask but not necessarily worry. My son was a projectile vomitor and I do mean like his entire bottle. You'd warn people and they'd be oh its ok but it was a ton of vomit. My ped said it was normal and he never cried like he had acid reflux

flerlgirl · June 2014

AmyG* said:

CJnKR2014 said:

JulieSmiles said:
How do I keep my LO from falling asleep during feelings? She will eat for 5 minutes or less a lot of times and then fall fast asleep. Not much has worked to keep her awake/ wake her. Suggestions?
This^

unswaddle her for feedings so she's more uncomfy. Use breast compressions and massage to speed the flow of milk when she loses interest or switch sides back and forth when she seems to conk.

sit her up at the waist, tickle toes, stroke the bridge of her nose, use a cool washcloth on toes, burp and try again in a little bit.

Their stomach when first born is the size of a swallow of amniotic fluid/1tsp/5ml. Then stomach stretches out and they can eat more over the course of that first week, but still smaller than a formula fed baby usually takes, about 1-2 oz every 2 hours working up to about 2-3 oz every 2-3 hours by about 3 weeks of age.

Also realize that they've never had to work for food before, and some babies seem to think they can just latch on and sleep and still get food. so nag em awake as much as you can but when you just can't get em awake if you get a very short feeding, nag baby to eat again right at 2 hours since start of last feeding. if you get a longer feeding, with lots of sucking and swallowing, you can let em go a bit longer up to about 3 hours between feeds.

count wet and poopy diapers. you want to see at least 1 per day of age for the first week and then then stay at 6-8 minimum a day after that.

---quote fail---
All this, and I change Jenna's diaper before the motn feedings because it wakes her up a little. If she keeps falling asleep I feed her in just her diaper.

ETA I just realized who I was quoting... Why did you come back, @AmyG*‌ ?

sumochik · June 2014

CJnKR2014 said:

JulieSmiles said:
How do I keep my LO from falling asleep during feelings? She will eat for 5 minutes or less a lot of times and then fall fast asleep. Not much has worked to keep her awake/ wake her. Suggestions?
This^

I find skin to skin works best to keep baby awake. Also, when supporting their neck you can stroke their face so there's constant stimulation. Take them off the boob and wake them
up to relatch. Tickle the bottom of their feet. Hth

efino87 · June 2014

@shannonliggett, I would prop him up to burp and support his head so that it won't flop back. Have you tried burping or feeding in other positions? I have found that holding baby upright, placing one hand on baby's chest and supporting his head while patting his back can make burping more efficient than just lightly patting his back.

jshrop · June 2014

shannonliggett said:
@efino87‌ Thank you! The problem is, this happened as he was eating, not while I was burping him. Sorry I didn't explain.

Maybe have him take a break, burp and then re latch? FTM so obvi no experience, but good luck with that!

ChristineBaker23 · June 2014

jshrop said:

shannonliggett said:
@efino87‌ Thank you! The problem is, this happened as he was eating, not while I was burping him. Sorry I didn't explain.
Maybe have him take a break, burp and then re latch? FTM so obvi no experience, but good luck with that!

Does he usually cry before eating? He could be swallowing air before he eats. If mine gets too worked up before I can shove my boob in her mouth I bounce her in a sitting position to calm her before she eats and she will sometimes burp. Also, how often is he nursing when he does this?

elsa1688 · June 2014

Idk where to put this question. I read somewhere it's best to put baby in a carrier in the froggie position. I think this means his legs are folded somehow but I can't figure out exactly how. @ncbelle‌ ?

ChristineBaker23 · June 2014

@JulieSmiles‌ I find that stroking baby's jaw bone gets her to start sucking again and also tickling behind her ear. If she really conks out I take her off, burp her, and if she sleeps through all that I assume she's done. I can almost five ounces in about 15 minutes or less so even if she eats for only ten and is done I feel like she's getting plenty.

Megan_e_rice · June 2014

shannonliggett said:

@efino87‌ Thank you! The problem is, this happened as he was eating, not while I was burping him. Sorry I didn't explain.

You can try feeding in a more upright position and burp mid feed. Let LO nurse for a few minutes so he starts feeling sated and then pop him off for a quick burp like others have suggested. Hope it helps!

elsa1688 · June 2014

@shannonliggett‌ perfect description! Thank you!!

ncbelle · June 2014

elsa1688 - You can wear baby legs in or legs out - really it's whichever baby prefers! Either way, baby should be positioned like you would hold him in arms - think about when baby is upright on your chest and you are holding one hand under the bum and one behind the back. Baby pulls up his knees in a sit squat automatically - the carrier should support that. If legs in, just make sure baby's weight is on the bum and not the feet.

There's a great video library for every carrier type here that might help those of you working to figure out carriers: https://babywearinginternational.org/articles.php I'm happy to help troubleshoot too

elsa1688 · June 2014

Thanks!!

SarahS11 · June 2014

What will the belly button look like when the umbilical stump falls off? Ours is getting close but it looks pretty yucky underneath... I guess I have no idea what to expect!

Kinipela7 · June 2014

@sarahs11- it just looks like a normal belly button. It had a little bit of crust in it but not much and wiped out easily with her first real bath.

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Being a mom is hard yo! Wtf do I do questions

Re: Being a mom is hard yo! Wtf do I do questions

Married DH 7/30/11

CSC arrived 5/7/12

CHC arrived 6/2/14

Married DH 7/30/11

CSC arrived 5/7/12

CHC arrived 6/2/14

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