Question for those with Step Parents...

rsideemd · June 2014

What does your DD or DS call them? My mom married my step dad when I was nine. He's been in my life a lot more than my real dad (who I only see a couple of times a year). I've always assumed that DD would call him Papa, but my mom informed me that he doesn't want to be called that. I can understand his reasoning, because he doesn't want to take anything away from my dad. But I'll admit, it definitely hurt hearing that. He just wants DD to call him by his real name.

I was just curious about other families.

minervacullen · June 2014

It was easier for DS to remember and associate my stepmom with grandma. He tacked on the dogs name after in his own. So each grand parent is grandma or grandpa pets name.

mb314 · June 2014

I had a step grandpa and called him Grandpa. However, for me, he was my only Grandpa (both of my biological grandfathers died before I was born, thanks to heavy cigarette smoking). I think it depends upon what your Step Father is comfortable with. I know step grandparents who go by "Papa Nick" or "Grandpa Joe".

JENandJEH · June 2014

My maternal grandmother remarried about a month before I was born so I always knew him as another grandpa and called him Papa. My maternal grandpa remarried when I was 13 and I always called her by her first name because I knew her before they got married as that. When I had my oldest, we started calling her Nanny first name because her grandkids call her Nanny.

DH's dad passed away when he was 10 and his mom remarried. He calls his stepdad by his first name but our kids call him Grandpa.

rsideemd · June 2014

mb314 said:

I had a step grandpa and called him Grandpa. However, for me, he was my only Grandpa (both of my biological grandfathers died before I was born, thanks to heavy cigarette smoking). I think it depends upon what your Step Father is comfortable with. I know step grandparents who go by "Papa Nick" or "Grandpa Joe".

This is what I was hoping for. My dad refers to himself as Papa J, so I was wanting my step dad to be Papa B. DD already calls him Papa, because that's what we've been telling her to do. I've just recently learned that he doesn't feel right being called that, so I really don't know what to do about it.

And honestly, he's going to be the only Papa she sees/knows. My dad lives in another state and travels for work constantly. My FIL is in poor health and doesn't know who she is. For me, I just want her to have a Papa around. I realize it's only a word... I guess it just hit me wrong to hear that.

mhickey426 · June 2014

I call my stepparents by their first name. We refer to them as Grandpop and Nana to my DD. She doesn't call them either yet so once she does start, those names might change but that will be based on her variation of Grandpop and Nana.

SLGILL1978 · June 2014

She will call them Grandma and Grandpa since they were married before she was born. My dad has a step mother as well and I have always called her Grandma and my dad called her by her first name.

[Deleted User] · June 2014

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LyndseylovesHugh · June 2014

My step-dad is grandpa John, my step-mom is Mimi and my H's stepdad is Opa. They are all grandparents to our kids too and all picked out their names.

wesleycrusher · June 2014

I call my step-dad by his first name, my DD calls him PopPop. My step-siblings have kids, DD's cousins, and they call him PopPop and my mom grandma, too.

My mom and step-dad have been together since before I can remember, so he is a father figure to me, and he is a grandfather figure to DD. That's why the name makes sense- the title of grandpa fits the role he plays in her life. It doesn't take away anything from my real dad's role.

mrscutforth · June 2014

My dad married my stepmom when I was 4. I call her by her first name to her face, when I talk about her I call her mom. I have designated 'Nana' as her grandma name.

maybebride · June 2014

My parents divorced when I was 5 and were both remarried by the time I was 8 (dad and stepmom subsequently divorced when I was an adult). I have always called both by their first names (except when speaking to my brothers about them, then they are Dad/Mom when referring to them). I have always called all of my "step grandparents" by their "grandparent" name. I was not the first grandchild in any scenario, even my biological grandparents, so I called them all whatever the older cousins had already established.

My stepmom is not really any my life anymore, so she does not know my son. My stepdad is Grandpa, at his request - we made him pick what he wanted to be called. My dad is around, but not able to be as involved, so Grandpa is the one he mostly knows and I would not have it any other way.

OP - I think I would just tell your stepdad that it means a lot to you and your child that he be Papa, that you both love him and WANT him to have that name and role.

stever · June 2014

My kids call my stepparents their names, but I don't consider either of my stepparents to be remotely parental towards me so it was never a consideration that they have grandparent names for my kids.

stgn01 · June 2014

My mom and her husband = Grandma and Pop

DH's mom and her husband = Bubbe and Papa

My dad = Gramps

DH's dad = not in the picture

My my got remarried when I was a senior in college. DH's mom got remarried when he was 13. We call both "stepfathers" by their names but kids call them Papa or Pop. We let the grandparents pick what name they would like to be called so they were comfortable with it. GL! I know divorces/remarriages are always hard for little ones to understand.

starrdiva211 · June 2014

My Mom and my stepdad ("Pops")= Grandma-ma and PawPaw
Ex's Mom and her husband= Grammy and Grampy
My Dad= His First Name (his choice and my niece and nephew call him by his first name but I may have my DS call him Granddaddy First Name)
EX's Dad= Passed Away

My mom got remarried when I was 13 and I have always called him by his first name or Pops. My step dad was there during those teenage years (bless him) and was there when my dad refused to be (because of his now ex wife).

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