Home with new baby.. (warning: a bit long)

NewMrsMacC · May 2014

Just wanted to give a intro, and join the forum. My darling baby is 2 weeks old now (she was born at 37 weeks) but we spent the first week of her life in the hospital. She was born with low blood sugar and spent the first few days of her life, in the NICU, and not with me in my room. I was terrified, FTM here. i have never experienced such terror as when they rushed in, and took her from me, explaining in a rushed sea of Dr's that her sugar was critically low, and she needed to be taken to the NICU immediately. They regulated her sugar after four days and everything turned out fine, apparently it is quite common (for babies to have this happen) and it is not anything we have to monitor of worry with... However, it scared me half to death, as you can imagine.

When we checked out of the hospital and came home, I could NOT put her down or take my eyes off of her without experiencing terrible anxiety. I tried putting her in the co-sleeper we bought and had attached to the bed, but it made me feel as though I couldn't breath.. I needed to her to be next to me.. after several hours of anxiety I told my husband I CAN'T, I need her in the bed, with us, in my arms.. he agreed, and right then and there.. my parenting style was born.

We bed-share, feed on demand, attend to every cry and need day or night, and I simply don't even like leaving her alone in a room while I run to do something as quick or simple as to put clothes in the dryer. My instincts told me right away how to care for my LO, and it seems as though attached parenting is what my husband and I are doing, naturally. I couldn't imagine being any other way than totally attached and in tune with this perfect little person who is so dependent on me to know what she needs- and make sure she feels safe and comfortable. I am so attached, and so totally in love with this little girl. I wanted to join this forum to read other parents stories and learn from others who share the parenting style I think my family fits into.

So hello to everyone, and I hope my story wasn't to terribly long.... It felt really good to tell it, and I appreciate your reading it, if you did.

[Deleted User] · May 2014

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NewMrsMacC · May 2014

I thought I edited that! lol! Editing again, yes 37 weeks!

ncbelle · May 2014

Congrats mama and welcome

alyshamarie007 · May 2014

Congrats! I completely understand your feelings.

sugarbear0524 · May 2014

Welcome! I totally understand your feelings...but, at some point you will need to find some balance. You'll need a few minutes alone, a hot shower, a nap, etc. It's healthy for you to attend to your own needs, too. And it's healthy for your husband to be the one to attend to your LO. Don't forget to take care of that sweet baby's Mama!

ToastieSimons · May 2014

Congrats on your baby!

My DS1 was born at 39w but has special needs. They took him to the NICU in another hospital. I was not allowed to room in with him. I struggle A LOT still (he's going to be 4) with letting him go. I think when the first real thing that happens to you is that your baby is taken away it really affects you. Give it time, and soon you will find a balance. I didn't even leave him in the church nursery until 3 months old that's how much I couldn't leave him. Every time I thought about leaving him it would bring back up the feelings of walking out of that hospital every night without my baby and I just couldn't do it. With time it will get easier.

NewMrsMacC · May 2014

Thank you all so much for your kind words, your support and your advise. I will absolutely remember to take care of me too, I know that is important, so I can take the best care of her! Having your baby taken away and to the NICU is the most terrifying thing that could happen- it definitely affects your level of anxiety in care-taking and attachment. I'm so glad you ladies understand and Im so grateful to have you all to talk to and relate to the issue. Thankfully we all have happy, healthy babies, despite the scares at the hospital after delivery. Again, thank you all- for sharing your stories, and for your support!

Myaflowers · May 2014

Welcome! I'm in Alabama, too! My DD was born at 36.6 weeks and was in the NICU for 4 days. She's 16 months and has done great since the day we brought her home. I remember being very anxious for the first month or so, and I think the NICU experience contributed to that.

pixieprincss · May 2014

Welcome! DS2 had a very quick bout with low blood sugar and that was scary enough. I'm so glad that your little one is doing well and that you've found a way to thrive together.