Co-sleeping- specifically room-sharing

Cassi215 · May 2014

Hi I am looking for parents who room-share by choice and if it is successful. Anyone who already room-shares or new moms who are planning on room-sharing long term. How are you feeling about it? How are husbands with it? Ways to introduce the idea to husbands or so? Research associated with it. Personal pros and cons and what youve done to overcome. Dealing with others opinions on how it's wrong. (Please no negative comments here. I'm not looking to start a debate. Just helpful advice)

nicole mackenzie · May 2014

I bed share. We'd originally planned on just room sharing.

I think I'm going to try and transition to her pnp so I can cuddle with DH. ( and other stuff when I'm cleared ) LO is almost 4 weeks.

I like bed sharing because I get more sleep not having to get up or leave the room to nurse.

I also like her close because I'm afraid she's choking with every noise I hear.

And it's nice to cuddle LO

janice9821 · May 2014

Everything nicole mackenzie said. We never planned on bed sharing but it was that or stop sleeping entirely so I sleep with DD in the guest bedroom. I'm trying to get her to sleep in the PNP so we can move back into the main bedroom where we'll room share until at least 6 months and maybe 1 year. DH is on board with this but then he hasn't questioned me about much of anything.

While bed sharing isn't recommended, room sharing reduces SIDS risk. That and the peace of mind of having her close by are why I wanted to do it.

babybarnes87 · May 2014

We room/bed share. DS in in a PnP bassinet next to me. Most mornings I bring him into the bed with us to snuggle and snooze for a few more hours. My goal is to transition him to his crib in the nursery at 3 or 4 months old.

Cassi215 · May 2014

It's nice to see a lot of moms are in the same boat as me. The twins are in their cribs most of the time but i room share (I have a queen size bed in their room) and I hate the idea if leaving them especially since when they need a little more we bed share and I'm always right here with them. We did couch share for the first month too.

I get a lot of negativity on this subject and my friends too who bed share. I'm tired of the constant "babies should sleep in their own room" and " you're creating a problem" I've seen the research both ways and it's very opinionated.

I'd really like for my husband to join us in their room from time to time with our dogs (we bed share with our dogs go figure

) it's just with all the negativity I want to positively introduce this idea to him without him being influenced by others.

fourthnlast · May 2014

Emma is in our room, but in a PNP. When we finish the remodel of our house this summer, she'll be moving into a room with her older sister.

padma55 · May 2014

I've bed shared with all of my children and I sleep better as does LO when we are cuddling at night. Dr. Sears writes about it and you can check out his studies online.

pallaviwankhs · May 2014

At night, we room share with Tia. Works out great coz she is right next to our bed and DH and I get to sleep together in our bed.
Only issue is that you hear every grunt, clearing her throat, short cry , etc. and wake up and check on her every now and then. We are getting to know gradually when she really needs us versus when she's just loud (for no parent-needed reason).
She will gradually be moved to her own room/crib at nights. Right now, she sleeps in her room during the day.
Hubby & I discussed this before Tia ws born and agreed (surprisingly!) on the overall day/night sleep plan. Now the only thing to watch is if Tia continues to agree to our plan

Lovelife14 · May 2014

We room-share with our 22-month old daughter. It wasn't necessarily in the plans, but there is a safety issue in her "bedroom" that needs to be addressed (we live in a colonial-era house, and there is a staircase in the room with a landing along each side that presents a risk for falling). Dh has been extremely lazy about fixing the problem, so she has stayed in our room. Now all four of is are in there. It's actually fine, and we love sharing a room with her. It makes night wakings easier.

maelic · May 2014

Elena is in a RnP in our room, on my husband's side of the bed. He rocks her if she fusses and changes her when it's time to nurse before bringing her to me. I don't get out of be unless it's to per or pump.

I want to transition her to the PnP but husband is being a pain about it because he's afraid of messing with what works (and the RnP works great). The goal is to transition her to her room and crib around 4 months.

*sparky* · May 2014

DD either sleeps in an RNP right next to our bed or in her PNP which is in the attached sitting room and we keep the door open. It's only 10-15 feet from our bed. When she has a particularly noisy night I don't get much sleep but for the most part I like having her close by. We will probably keep this arrangement until she is 3 months or so.

babym6705 · May 2014

Cassi215 said:
It's nice to see a lot of moms are in the same boat as me. The twins are in their cribs most of the time but i room share (I have a queen size bed in their room) and I hate the idea if leaving them especially since when they need a little more we bed share and I'm always right here with them. We did couch share for the first month too.

I get a lot of negativity on this subject and my friends too who bed share. I'm tired of the constant "babies should sleep in their own room" and " you're creating a problem" I've seen the research both ways and it's very opinionated.

I'd really like for my husband to join us in their room from time to time with our dogs (we bed share with our dogs go figure ) it's just with all the negativity I want to positively introduce this idea to him without him being influenced by others.

This doesn't really address the OP, but the negativity drives me crazy too. My MIL constantly makes comments about how it's a problem and IMO it's not a problem, it's what works for me and my kiddos. We love the cuddle time and extra sleep. DH isn't crazy about it but the kids will only be little for awhile and one day they won't want to crawl in bed and cuddle so honestly I don't care about anyone's opinion on it or the research against it.

cwm11985 · May 2014

I room-shared with my toddler for 6 months; my husband slept in the guest room for the first 2-3 months because the baby was so damn noisy. This time around I volunteered to sleep in the guest room with the baby; she's recently gotten more quiet during the night so we'll move into the master bedroom soon and switch her to the nursery at 6 months.

Yogini6911 · May 2014

In the beginning I had no problem bed sharing because that was the only way that I got to sleep. DH was slightly nervous about this and i didn't intend on doing this but I would fall asleep after as I was burping DS after nursing him. He always woke up when I put him down or would only sleep maybe an hour max. The times when he slept on me I realized that I would get 3hrs of sleep in (& felt like a million bucks). We transitioned LO to a bassinet beside our bed when he was 2w old and got him to stay asleep by warming it up with a heating pad. That worked and allowed me to stop bed sharing.

At 1mo we transitioned DS to his room in his crib and he's been there ever since (he's almost 2mo now). I will bed share when he wakes up at 6am to feed and we will sleep until 9am. This though will end in a week when I go back to work but I may still do this on the weekends. I love babies in the morning-they're so bright eyed and happy to see you, so I love our bed sharing moments.

Of course everyone gives me grief on bed sharing but this is mostly those that are older who have kids that are over 18yo. All of my friends with little ones understand the bed sharing (especially at the beginning) and support the idea regardless of what the docs may say.

So if you decide to bed share, go ahead and do it...do what's best for your family. I will take some precautions like putting DS in the middle and basically surround him with my snoogle pillow so that he can't be rolled on. But nothing beats the smiles and the cooing that he gives me when he sees me laying next to him.

imogenisis · May 2014

DD sleeps in her bassinet on my side of the bed. I can't imagine otherwise. I'm too lazy to walk all the way to the other side of the house several times a night to breast feed! We'll probably start using her crib when she's sleeping longer.

MrsZ0811 · May 2014

Right now dd is in the rnp on my side of the bed, I love having her where I can just open my eyes and see her. Also I do not have to get out of bed at all during the night unless I have to pee. On work nights I take care of her completely until DH's alarm goes off. On non-work nights DH wakes to change her for me and get me a snack or water if I need it and then I feed her. On work days after DH leaves I will occasionally let her snuggle in bed with me for a couple hours. Not sure about when she will transition into her room. We'll keep doing this as long as its working for all of us.

zazu13 · May 2014

AllyxCore85 said:
We tried to do this at first. But DH and I just couldn't handle it. We had DS in the RnP next to my side of the bed. but DS is a really noisy sleeper. He grunts a lot, but is totally fine. So it would wake us up constantly. So he is in the RnP in his room and we have the monitor on. It works much better and he def lets us know when he is really upset, hungry, etc.

It doesn't work for everyone but I don't see anything wrong with co-sleeping/room sharing etc.

This. I wanted to room share but I was getting no sleep and slowly losing my sanity. DH is happier with the new arrangwment yoo. Sorry thats not really an answer to your question.

nycgirlkat · May 2014

We kind of room share. Because I'm bottle feeding I have to chill and warm up bottles for the 2 middle of the night feedings and even though DH went out and bought a mini fridge for LO's room, we don't have an upstairs bathroom due to a remodel gone awry so I have to go up and down stairs in the middle of the night to warm up the bottles (which wasn't ideal in the beginning because I had a c-section).

So LO and I have been sleeping in the living room, her in either her PnP or RnP and me on the couch or in a recliner, some nights with her on me because of the colic. Since DH has to go to work, we found it better if we slept in a different areas so he can sleep at night and I can nap in the afternoon when he gets home. But this weekend we're going to room share upstairs at least on weekends (either LO & I in her room with me on the pull out and her in the bassinet or all 3 of us in our bedroom with LO in a bassinet). I need to sleep in a bed after an entire month on the couch!

smushi · May 2014

I co slept from week 2 to week 4, in order to let LO sleep (he would not sleep anywhere else). Everyone in my family was against it, but it worked well for us and was safe since I had a firm mattress and kept myself propped up with my arm. I would side lie nurse. He did very well. It worked great because I could check his body temp and make sure he was covered, etc, and know instantly if he was upset. However, I find that I'm so paranoid that I can't sleep near him (because every sound makes me worry), so he sleeps now in his crib just 10 feet away in the next room. I can hear some sounds of distress but not all of the typical sleep grunts.

mammasuzelov · May 2014

We've had some really hot weather here 30+ every day and she currently sleeps in her own room but (and I've mentioned this in another thread) in Sweden they don't have AC in apartments. so we keep our windows open for the breeze but I worry about her all night when she's in that room. Especially since the sun is up at 3am and shining on her window heating the room up even more.

To make sure I can regulate her temp I've moved her crib into our room. It's tough, she's a noisy sleeper but at least I know when she needs a blanket or to be stripped down a layer of clothing or put more on.

When the weather breaks, we'll move her back into her room. Here's hoping it's not a hot summer. Also I'll feel better when I have mosquito netting up on her windows and we will be purchasing white heat reflecting blinds

Long story short, she's been sleeping in her own room in her own crib since she was two weeks old and it's been working for us and for her.

And now she's in our room and it's working for her because she's not too hot but it's a bit chaotic for us.

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