Please Share Your Grossest Story Here (Warning: Gross Stories)

SandyClam · May 2014

What's the grossest story that you've read or had happen to you?
(Brought to you by Rita's creamed corn story and this really gross reddit story https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/xo41d/doctorsnursesredditors_what_has_been_your_most/c5o66p2)

SandyClam · May 2014

mbenit4 said:

Block Eva!!!!!!!!!!!!! You've be warned!!!!!!!!

Lol! Is she a troll?

SandyClam · May 2014

pobrecita said:

When I was at the NJ shore as a kid, probably around 4, a little boy found a starfish and gave it to me. I ate it. It was alive. I ate a live starfish.

Aren't starfish like scary looking IRL? That's hardcore!

jesuisfatiguee · May 2014

pobrecita said:

When I was at the NJ shore as a kid, probably around 4, a little boy found a starfish and gave it to me. I ate it. It was alive. I ate a live starfish.

Ozzy, is that you?

WasNotWas · May 2014

All mine involve poop

RondackHiker · May 2014

I was going to share a story about cleaning a horse's tracheostomy or about having dog surgeries done on my kitchen table, but compared to the reddit story, they're pathetic.

I don't think I know @LovelyRitaMeterMaid‌'s story.

jesuisfatiguee · May 2014

justAphase said:

Ok, now you will hear why I refuse to have buttsecks. One of my friends in high school did and she shit the bed. Story was shared. I made a pact then and I have kept it ever since. It's probably the only promise I've made to myself that I have kept.

You're supposed to poo beforehand. Which always confused me, because how do you shit on command just to get a little butt action going? I'll never know. #antibuttsecks

kellyrn9956 · May 2014

************VERY VERY GRAPHIC AND VERY VERY SAD************ I am a nurse. My poor, poor patient's esophageal tumor eroded her carotid. I will never ever get the visual out of my head. She exsanguinated in front of my eyes, pretty much out of her mouth, and drowned in her own blood. I still think about her all the time.

SandyClam · May 2014

justAphase said:

Ok, now you will hear why I refuse to have buttsecks. One of my friends in high school did and she shit the bed. Story was shared. I made a pact then and I have kept it ever since. It's probably the only promise I've made to myself that I have kept.

I've heard of this happening before. Was it a 1 time thing or was her butthole permanently ruined? She shit the like after or during the sex?

Rxmom04 · May 2014

During my externship I had to do a rotation at a hospital that wanted me to spend a few days in the ER. Sure, no problem- almost the first patient the nurse I'm following gets is a morbidly obese patient with probable UTI but they have to cath her to get a urine sample and I got to help. Lucky me. I'd swear it was chocolate milk if not for the smell, still one of grossest things I've seen and smelled in my career. And one of many reasons I am in pharmacy and not a nurse. Much respect to any of you that are, don't know how you do it.

kellyrn9956 · May 2014

Kapaajoy said:

I once flushed an earwig out of my sinus cavity with a Neti pot. It was dead, but I'm not sure if it died in there, it was killed by the saline solution. I hate earwigs.

Holy shit!!!

studyinpink · May 2014

That thread on reddit was pretty epic. I seriously wonder if the lady survived an infection like that and how not sterile that or ended up being.

Lots of gross stuff but one that stands out was an or case as a student. I had to help hold open a guys abdominal cavity for surgery. The clamps weren't holding it open wide enough or the surgeon needed to see better.

I was scared and grossed out and pulling it open with all my stegnth and shaking for like an hour. It was seriously stressful and although I knew I didn't want to do or- there was no way I ever would after that.

SandyClam · May 2014

Nurses have the best stories. I seriously have no idea how anyone is a nurse. I think that your jobs are probably much more intense than what doctors deal with.

kellyrn9956 · May 2014

I also took care of a trauma patients whose abdomen could not be closed after surgery. I had to apply a vacuum dressing directly to his intestines, stomach, liver, etc every 2 days.

SandyClam · May 2014

je+suis=fatiguee said:

justAphase said:

Ok, now you will hear why I refuse to have buttsecks. One of my friends in high school did and she shit the bed. Story was shared. I made a pact then and I have kept it ever since. It's probably the only promise I've made to myself that I have kept.

You're supposed to poo beforehand. Which always confused me, because how do you shit on command just to get a little butt action going? I'll never know. #antibuttsecks

There's actually an answer to this. If you have to poop, you can actually feel the turds through your vaginal wall. Seriously, next time you sit down to poop, put your finger in your vagina and feel. You can manually push it out. I know that you don't want to and you're cringing at the thought. But do it. It's so weird and gross.

kellyrn9956 · May 2014

justAphase said:

Except I'll hopefully be going into psych and that's not nearly as gross as other areas of nursing. Well, most of the time.

Lots and lots of shit smearing in psych. You're welcome.

SandyClam · May 2014

He probably had one of those weird fetishes where he liked to wear a diaper and pretend to be a baby.
Source: a CSI episode

kellyrn9956 · May 2014

I gave a bed bath to an old dude who, come to find out later, had bathed himself every day prior to that. I was a student. It was scarring.

studyinpink · May 2014

Sketch @kellyrn9956‌. Fraking creepy dirty old man

SandyClam · May 2014

Whoa, @Whocanitbenow! That's hardcore for a kid. How old were you?

SandyClam · May 2014

WhoCanItBeNow said:

SandyClam said:

Whoa, @Whocanitbenow! That's hardcore for a kid. How old were you?

16 I think? Maybe 17.

I scraped my cat off the highway when I was 8 after watching it get hit by a blue semi. That probably explains a lot about me.

You have a compact pussy?

Too soon?

martha919 · May 2014

WhoCanItBeNow said:
We had sheep on our farm. We had a ewe we thought was in labor, but wasn't progressing. My stepdad told me to go in and get the lamb before it died. (No, that's not the gross part.) So I went in and I kept telling him I couldn't get the lamb- I could barely get a finger though. He told me to just get it and get it out. I kept trying but she wasn't dilated. Finally he went to try. Surprise. Not in labor. We gave her some antibiotics in case I jacked anything up while I was poking around in there.

So the next day she goes into labor. Finally. She was really struggling, so my stepdad wanted me to help her speed things along. I was able to get a hold of the lamb that time, got the nose between the front feet and started to pull. The smell coming out of her was awful. My mom threw up and ran to get my step dad because there should never be that kind of smell from that. I finally got to the end and pulled out the front feet, head and half of the spine. That was it. We figure the lamb had died in utero a week or two before and started decomposing. My step dad was kind and got the rest out himself instead of making me finish it.

Omfg.

OMFG.

The earwig thing creeps me the fuck out, but I think you won the thread. Fuck no.

NarwhalBacon · May 2014

I don't really have an awesome gross story. I did last year have MRSA. Imagine those videos where people drain abcesses and they just ooze violently for 5 minutes. Now imagine eight of those on one ass cheek.

NotSharknado · May 2014

When I was newly pregnant with Sophia Ds had the stomach flu one night and had shit his underwear so I helped him into the bathroom to clean him up and he also had to puke. Well, while he was puking he started shitting and shit splattered all over the walls of the bathroom. The poor kid just kept saying how sorry he was. Of course I made it out like it was no big deal but damn that was rough on a pregnant stomach.

NarwhalBacon · May 2014

WhoCanItBeNow said:

NarwhalBacon said:

I don't really have an awesome gross story. I did last year have MRSA. Imagine those videos where people drain abcesses and they just ooze violently for 5 minutes. Now imagine eight of those on one ass cheek.

Nice. I had one on my face and one in my armpit. But not 8 though. Ew.

DH would have been in heaven squeezing them.

And that's why we scored high on the gross quiz.

I let my mom drain them. She had fun. It was probably the most painful experience of my life. An entire bath towel was soaked in pus and we had to throw it away. Every time she thought she was done more would come out. It was the Never Ending Story of ass infections.

NotSharknado · May 2014

Mackalien13 said:

I would tell the story of when I pooped my pants. But evidently, that is not uncommon around here.

Tell us for shits n giggles

NarwhalBacon · May 2014

Is it bad that most of this shit I just wish I had seen it happen? Except bugs in the nose. No, hell no. Fucking no.

kellyrn9956 · May 2014

I had a bad stomach virus. I was making soup for me and H for dinner and I sharted. He refused to eat that soup. Bastard.

studyinpink · May 2014

And all of @lovelyritametermaid stories is why I'm a nicu nurse. And because I love babies.

But seriously adult nursing is so gross.

NeneCakies · May 2014

SFOP goes here

studyinpink · May 2014

NeneCakies said:
SFOP goes here

Exactly. And the gif.

studyinpink · May 2014

The anal sex residual stories. Vom.

SandyClam · May 2014

Oh, another earwig story! My friend was eating at this restaurant in town that was suspect to begin with. It was like a poor man's version of PF Changs. Anyway, he eats almost his entire plate of food and there was a dead earwig at the bottom.

NarwhalBacon · May 2014

As often as we have anal, we have never had any mishaps. I must have a perfectly pristine asshole.

SandyClam · May 2014

NarwhalBacon said:

As often as we have anal, we have never had any mishaps. I must have a perfectly pristine asshole.

Do you bleach it?

studyinpink · May 2014

Welp, I regret googling earwigs. They look like long roaches.

NarwhalBacon · May 2014

SandyClam said:

NarwhalBacon said:

As often as we have anal, we have never had any mishaps. I must have a perfectly pristine asshole.

Do you bleach it?

Haha, I'm definitely no anal bleacher.

NeneCakies · May 2014

I get white heads in weird places that go undetected until they are gigantic. I had one in my ear. I wondered why my ear buds hurt and had DH look and found it. I poked at it until I felt it burst then he got the rest out with a qtip. He called it an ear donut (as in cream filled). We are now on ear donut patrol and he keeps thinking he has one but when I look it's nothing and then he gets the sadz. I win.

Another time after my honeymoon I found one on my lady bits. One squeeze and it exploded all over my hand held mirror. It was awesome.

SandyClam · May 2014

NeneCakies said:

I get white heads in weird places that go undetected until they are gigantic. I had one in my ear. I wondered why my ear buds hurt and had DH look and found it. I poked at it until I felt it burst then he got the rest out with a qtip. He called it an ear donut (as in cream filled). We are now on ear donut patrol and he keeps thinking he has one but when I look it's nothing and then he gets the sadz. I win. Another time after my honeymoon I found one on my lady bits. One squeeze and it exploded all over my hand held mirror. It was awesome.

My sister had a whitehead in her ear once and I popped it...it spurted directly onto my mouth.

NarwhalBacon · May 2014

Ok this is pretty morbid, I totally forgot about it. My dad died in his apartment when I was 14. We aren't sure how long it was until he was found, guessing about 3 days. The neighbor called the manager to complain of a smell.
Well FF a couple days, we got the ok to clean his apartment out. Whoever cleaned it had missed some "fluid" and there was this stuff that looked like tobacco spit all over the side of the bed and in the floor. It smelled like straight up rotten flesh. I will never forget that smell.

SandyClam · May 2014

NarwhalBacon said:

Ok this is pretty morbid, I totally forgot about it. My dad died in his apartment when I was 14. We aren't sure how long it was until he was found, guessing about 3 days. The neighbor called the manager to complain of a smell. Well FF a couple days, we got the ok to clean his apartment out. Whoever cleaned it had missed some "fluid" and there was this stuff that looked like tobacco spit all over the side of the bed and in the floor. It smelled like straight up rotten flesh. I will never forget that smell.

OMG. I am so sorry. Thanks, dad!

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