My doctor is (possibly) on vacation?

maryingamohr · May 2014

I had my week 34 check up today. I was a little annoyed waiting for over a half hour in the room for my lady Doctor to come in so I could hear Miss Madelyn's heartbeat and go home to my hubby and 2 year old son. Business as usual, she apologized for the wait she had to run over to the hospital, OK annoyance averted. However, she asked how my delivery with my first child went (my original doctor for my first pregnancy left the area), when I said he was a week late she went on to say that she was thinking of taking vacation the weekend my baby girl is due?! Who does that?! I have been coming to this Doctor and have not always been completely satisfied with her methods, but we have been going to every appointment since we found out at 1 month along we were pregnant! She has clearly known for a long time now when she has a baby due for delivery, why would she even consider going away? Am I wrong here? I have trusted this Doctor and entrusted that she would be there to deliver my daughter, not some stranger?! More particularly my husband and I chose a female Doctor for a reason I am more comfortable around female doctors and well my husband is a guy doesn't want any other guy down there for any reason, whatever situation reversed I understand that. She is the only OB/GYN in my area the only other 2 females in the field are Midwives. Am I wrong to freak out over this? Should I express my concern at my next visit in 2 weeks?

ADC1979 · May 2014

My doctor already told me in the first trimester that she may not be there to deliver because she usually takes a vacation in July. She said she's only missed 3 births out of all that she's done, and she doesn't like to miss. But vacation is vacation, and I don't begrudge her that.

My doctor works with a pool of 3-4 other doctors and they trade out for just such occasions--so whoever attends me will be someone my doctor trusts, if not my doctor herself.

From what I've been reading and hearing at different classes I've gone to so far, your L&D nurse is almost more important than your doctor--they will be with you for much longer, so you want to be sure you have a good one. That's where my concern mainly is, after experiencing a terrible nurse at a major surgery I had when I was 12. Since that time, I've learned to not be afraid to talk to (or have hubby talk to) the nurse at the charge desk to get a new one assigned,

tlc35 · May 2014

Idani said:

Um your doctor is allowed a life outside of you. Also a big WTF your husband only wants a female doctor. Seriously OP I can't even begin to tell you how much is wrong here...........

This. No matter when she takes a vacation, somebody might deliver when she is gone. Do you really expect her to change her plans because your baby might be born? I know it is disappointing but as long as she has someone to cover for her, nothing is wrong with it.

DBonfante · May 2014

I have two delivering doctors in my practice and there is still a chance that they will both not be on call or available for the birth of my baby. That's just the nature of the game. Doctors have their own schedules and lives. No matter when you deliver I'm sure a competent doctor will be available to assist. If you are concerned make sure you have your strong desires written down so that you can express them to a new doctor if that becomes the case.

ASmallWonder · May 2014

Come on you guys. You know nothing gives a guy wood more than staring at a gaping, bloody vagina with a human coming out of it. BOING!

mamaloaf · May 2014

Well aren't you a special little snowflake! How dare your doc take a vacation knowing your baby may come!

For real, get over yourself. They aren't on call 24/7 for every patient. That's why many OB's have multiple providers, so they can have days off and schedule vacation. Did the thought not cross your mind until she brought it up?

And I'm not even going to touch your husband's issues...

Pepper6 · May 2014

I'm sorry you are disappointed that your doctor may be on vacation around the time you deliver, but yes, you are wrong to expect that she schedule her vacation around you.

Aside from the fact that it's utterly impossible to determine exactly when you'll go into labor and therefore impossible for her to schedule her life around you....you do know you are not her only patient, right? Lets just say she has a patient due every week...when exactly do you expect her to take a vacation to avoid missing a single birth? Do you think doctors don't deserve time off like everyone else just because someone might go into labor?

Also, I get where you are coming from with being more comfortable with a female doctor. I, too, am more comfortable with a female, more from a perspective that they can empathize and share their own experiences vs being actually uncomfortable with a man. However, when delivery comes, I can guarantee you that if you have a male doctor, that there is absolutely NOTHING sexual about the process and your husband will need to get the F over it.

24karat · May 2014

maryingamohr said:
I had my week 34 check up today. I was a little annoyed waiting for over a half hour in the room for my lady Doctor to come in so I could hear Miss Madelyn's heartbeat and go home to my hubby and 2 year old son. Business as usual, she apologized for the wait she had to run over to the hospital, OK annoyance averted. However, she asked how my delivery with my first child went (my original doctor for my first pregnancy left the area), when I said he was a week late she went on to say that she was thinking of taking vacation the weekend my baby girl is due?! Who does that?! I have been coming to this Doctor and have not always been completely satisfied with her methods, but we have been going to every appointment since we found out at 1 month along we were pregnant! She has clearly known for a long time now when she has a baby due for delivery, why would she even consider going away? Am I wrong here? I have trusted this Doctor and entrusted that she would be there to deliver my daughter, not some stranger?! More particularly my husband and I chose a female Doctor for a reason I am more comfortable around female doctors and well my husband is a guy doesn't want any other guy down there for any reason, whatever situation reversed I understand that. She is the only OB/GYN in my area the only other 2 females in the field are Midwives. Am I wrong to freak out over this? Should I express my concern at my next visit in 2 weeks?

QFP

I understand being a little frustrated, but this really is an overreaction and comes off as self-centered entitlement. Even if she didn't go on vacation there's a good chance she might not attend your L&D. OBs have rotating shifts so you'd be pretty lucky to catch the one she's on. And at least she told you ahead of time she might not be there for a whole weekend.

PrimRoseMama · May 2014

Idani said:
Um your doctor is allowed a life outside of you. Also a big WTF your husband only wants a female doctor. Seriously OP I can't even begin to tell you how much is wrong here...........

Right? Doctors have lives too & need vacations. Geez man. Self-centered much?

[Deleted User] · May 2014

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PrimRoseMama · May 2014

Dude the President of The United States could have delivered DS & I would have spread eagle then tell him to catch! :P

At 41 weeks I would have delivered him in a cab. I just wanted the boy OUT.

[Deleted User] · May 2014

The user and all related content has been deleted.

LilSip0611 · May 2014

I can understand being disappointed but you really cannot expect a doctor to schedule their vacation around you specifically, they do have other patients and their own lives outside of being your doctor. My OB is the only doctor in his practice and I'm due in August. Is there a good chance that he might be on vacation with his family before his kids go back to school, absolutely. Do I trust that the on call doctor or whomever he has cover will be just as competent as him, you bet.

bazingaa · May 2014

I really can't think of anything to add to this that PPs haven't already mentioned. THANK YOU for the good laugh though OP.

lookame3639 · May 2014

First sometimes you have to wait at your appointments there may have been (and sounds like there was) an emergency. She has other patients, you are not center of the universe

second your ob needs a break too...again not the center of the universe

Third when I was pregnant with DS i had a male ob. There were no boundaries crossed and there was absolutely nothing romantic about any visits or the delivery....confused why that'd be an issue...unless your husband has some serious jealousy issues

Unknown · May 2014

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spacepotatoes · May 2014

Wow, you are a special snowflake.

1. You had to wait over half an hour for your "lady doctor"? If that's unusual for your clinic, sign me up because I'd love to have things move that quickly. OBs deal with all kinds of things, babies don't keep to a tight schedule. Sorry.

2. Who schedules a vacation the week your baby is due? Someone with a life of her own, that's who. You are not the only one due that week, I'm sure. She is not obligated to stick around waiting for your baby. Not to mention the fact that your baby is not guaranteed to come exactly at that time. There is always a possibility when you give birth that your OB will not be the one to deliver you. In my clinic, there are 9 OBs. I have a 1 in 9 shot that my doctor will be the one on call when I go. Oh well.

3. To OBGYNs, looking at your vagina is their job. They are seeing parts of the anatomy and looking at whether it's healthy or not. They are not seeing it as a sex object (except in the most literal sense). And when a baby's head is coming out of it, it will be the total opposite of sexy. They also see dozens of them every single day. Yours will not stand out. Your husband needs to get over himself.

A reality check is in order, OP, big time. Do you not know anyone else who's ever had kids?

ETA: Looking at your post history, it appears you already have a child. If that's the case, how is any of this news to you??

ETA2: I totally missed that you mentioned your first child in your OP. Reading fail. But now I'm wondering why you wouldn't consider one of the midwives if this is such an issue for you. They are also very knowledgeable and capable of lady doctoring.

SaranJonathan · May 2014

While yes I would like my obgyn there for the delivery I am not holding my breath. You get who's on call. Nature of where I live. I think its crazy that you expect your obgyn not to go on vacation.

greeneyed_bride · May 2014

Ok, according to you, she's the only OB/GYN in your area. So it stands to reason that she has a fairly busy practice. If she made sure she never went on vacation when a patient might be in labor (and since anywhere from 38-42 weeks is totally normal for a full term delivery, she'd have to reserve a full month around each patient's due date,) the poor woman would never get a day off, ever.

As for the female vs male OB/GYN issue. I absolutely prefer a female OB/GYN in general. I'm more comfortable discussing "awkward" things like vaginal discharge with a female than with a man, even though I know a male OB/GYN would be totally professional. It's just a personal preference. However, labor and delivery is a whole different ballgame. By the time I was wheeled into the operating room for an unplanned c-section 26+ hours after my water broke, labor with pitocin, and an epidural that completely wore off on half my body, there could've been an entire NFL team in the operating room witnessing me lying completely naked on the table, and I wouldn't have given a crap.

If your husband has issues with a male physician seeing your vagina, now is an excellent time for him to get over it. Even if you only ever see a female OB/GYN, that's not a guarantee that no male medical professional will ever have to give you a pelvic exam. My husband is an ER doctor, and he sometimes does dozens of pelvic exams a week. Pregnant patients get a pelvic exam. Patients with unexplained vaginal bleeding get a pelvic exam. Patients with unexplained lower abdominal pain get a pelvic exam. Patients with symptoms that could potentially be caused by an STD get a pelvic exam. In other words, my husband sees hundreds of vaginas a year. Does that bother me? No. Because he's a professional and IT'S HIS JOB. I can promise you that he is not down there thinking "man, this chick's vagina is hot." He's looking for risks to a patient's health, life, or baby. Period. The idea that your husband "doesn't want any other guy down there for any reason" is something that indicates that he needs to grow up; it's not a reason for your OB to never be allowed to have a day off.

Hoshikitsune · May 2014

At least you have met your OB. I am 30 weeks and the only people I have had contact with at my OB's office is the nurse and the receptionist. I have no idea who my doctor is.

WashingtonQueen · May 2014

WTF is wrong with a midwife?

britab · May 2014

My doctor is pregnant and due about a week after me. How dare she! Wait, it'll be fine. I met the doctor that will take her place if she has her baby before mine.

Doctors have lives too! You also can't guarantee when you'll have your baby, so she could change schedule her vacation schedule and you could still deliver while she's gone.

Unknown · May 2014

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khaalid00 · May 2014

I am going to be 38 weeks soon. So I was told a month ago that my OB will be on vacation two weeks before I am due. Well I am not worry and will be taken care of by another doctor at the best hospital in the country if I go into labor that week. People are entitled to take vacations...I wish I could take one now but gotta work and save vac/sick time for maternity. Oh well, not going to fuss, just going with the flow of life.

mysticl · May 2014

Hoshikitsune said:

At least you have met your OB. I am 30 weeks and the only people I have had contact with at my OB's office is the nurse and the receptionist. I have no idea who my doctor is.

By nurse do you mean midwife? Because there is no way you have not seen a qualified practitioner by 30 weeks if you are receiving regular pre-natal care.

rainydayluck · May 2014

spacepotatoes said:

Wow, you are a special snowflake.

1. You had to wait over half an hour for your "lady doctor"? If that's unusual for your clinic, sign me up because I'd love to have things move that quickly. OBs deal with all kinds of things, babies don't keep to a tight schedule. Sorry.

Stuck in the quote box

Sign me up too! I am not even going to touch the rest of the crazy, f-ed up shit in OP's post, but man OP, how have you gotten by in life this long with your entitled attitude?

Unknown · May 2014

This content has been removed.

Hoshikitsune · May 2014

mysticl said:

Hoshikitsune said:

At least you have met your OB. I am 30 weeks and the only people I have had contact with at my OB's office is the nurse and the receptionist. I have no idea who my doctor is.

By nurse do you mean midwife? Because there is no way you have not seen a qualified practitioner by 30 weeks if you are receiving regular pre-natal care.

Nope, just the nurse and the receptionist. The nurse takes blood pressure, doppler, and fundal height, then asks if I have felt the baby. So far no issues other than once I didn't feel the baby move for like 40 hours...she had me come in checked the doppler and sent me home. Then I go see the receptionist to make my next appointment. I have not seen a single person with an MD after their name. I would assume that I will soon given that I am now 31 weeks.

AMcLaws · May 2014

Hoshikitsune said:

mysticl said:

Hoshikitsune said:

At least you have met your OB. I am 30 weeks and the only people I have had contact with at my OB's office is the nurse and the receptionist. I have no idea who my doctor is.

By nurse do you mean midwife? Because there is no way you have not seen a qualified practitioner by 30 weeks if you are receiving regular pre-natal care.

Nope, just the nurse and the receptionist. The nurse takes blood pressure, doppler, and fundal height, then asks if I have felt the baby. So far no issues other than once I didn't feel the baby move for like 40 hours...she had me come in checked the doppler and sent me home. Then I go see the receptionist to make my next appointment. I have not seen a single person with an MD after their name. I would assume that I will soon given that I am now 31 weeks.

Dear god....what kind of office are you going to?? I've NEVER heard of such a thing!! She must be at least a nurse practitioner. I sure hope so, at least. Otherwise, you may want to consider a different office in the future. Is there even a doctor on staff???

Hoshikitsune · May 2014

AMcLaws said:

mysticl said:

Hoshikitsune said:

At least you have met your OB. I am 30 weeks and the only people I have had contact with at my OB's office is the nurse and the receptionist. I have no idea who my doctor is.

By nurse do you mean midwife? Because there is no way you have not seen a qualified practitioner by 30 weeks if you are receiving regular pre-natal care.

Nope, just the nurse and the receptionist. The nurse takes blood pressure, doppler, and fundal height, then asks if I have felt the baby. So far no issues other than once I didn't feel the baby move for like 40 hours...she had me come in checked the doppler and sent me home. Then I go see the receptionist to make my next appointment. I have not seen a single person with an MD after their name. I would assume that I will soon given that I am now 31 weeks.
Dear god....what kind of office are you going to?? I've NEVER heard of such a thing!! She must be at least a nurse practitioner. I sure hope so, at least. Otherwise, you may want to consider a different office in the future. Is there even a doctor on staff???

The only one that takes medicaid for miles. I have no idea of her designation, I never asked. I have heard there is a doctor on staff, just never seen them.

Hoshikitsune · May 2014

Str31 said:

Hoshikitsune said:

AMcLaws said:

mysticl said:

Hoshikitsune said:

At least you have met your OB. I am 30 weeks and the only people I have had contact with at my OB's office is the nurse and the receptionist. I have no idea who my doctor is.

By nurse do you mean midwife? Because there is no way you have not seen a qualified practitioner by 30 weeks if you are receiving regular pre-natal care.

Nope, just the nurse and the receptionist. The nurse takes blood pressure, doppler, and fundal height, then asks if I have felt the baby. So far no issues other than once I didn't feel the baby move for like 40 hours...she had me come in checked the doppler and sent me home. Then I go see the receptionist to make my next appointment. I have not seen a single person with an MD after their name. I would assume that I will soon given that I am now 31 weeks.
Dear god....what kind of office are you going to?? I've NEVER heard of such a thing!! She must be at least a nurse practitioner. I sure hope so, at least. Otherwise, you may want to consider a different office in the future. Is there even a doctor on staff???

The only one that takes medicaid for miles. I have no idea of her designation, I never asked. I have heard there is a doctor on staff, just never seen them.

Is she a nurse or a nurse practitioner- there is a difference. Our office has MDs and one NP and of course a nursing staff. I've seen the NP twice and she said I can see her or the OBs- it doesn't matter, totally my choice. I like her a lot so I went back to her again but I've also been seen by OBs at most visits...

If you are being seen by a NP I wouldn't worry although I would ask to meet the OB before delivery.

Once again no idea. I will ask when I see them again in two weeks.

ElTrain5 · May 2014

Hoshikitsune said:

Str31 said:

Hoshikitsune said:

AMcLaws said:

Hoshikitsune said:

mysticl said:

Hoshikitsune said:

At least you have met your OB. I am 30 weeks and the only people I have had contact with at my OB's office is the nurse and the receptionist. I have no idea who my doctor is.

By nurse do you mean midwife? Because there is no way you have not seen a qualified practitioner by 30 weeks if you are receiving regular pre-natal care.

Nope, just the nurse and the receptionist. The nurse takes blood pressure, doppler, and fundal height, then asks if I have felt the baby. So far no issues other than once I didn't feel the baby move for like 40 hours...she had me come in checked the doppler and sent me home. Then I go see the receptionist to make my next appointment. I have not seen a single person with an MD after their name. I would assume that I will soon given that I am now 31 weeks.
Dear god....what kind of office are you going to?? I've NEVER heard of such a thing!! She must be at least a nurse practitioner. I sure hope so, at least. Otherwise, you may want to consider a different office in the future. Is there even a doctor on staff???

The only one that takes medicaid for miles. I have no idea of her designation, I never asked. I have heard there is a doctor on staff, just never seen them.

Is she a nurse or a nurse practitioner- there is a difference. Our office has MDs and one NP and of course a nursing staff. I've seen the NP twice and she said I can see her or the OBs- it doesn't matter, totally my choice. I like her a lot so I went back to her again but I've also been seen by OBs at most visits...

If you are being seen by a NP I wouldn't worry although I would ask to meet the OB before delivery.

Once again no idea. I will ask when I see them again in two weeks.

I would check to see if she is a nurse
practitioner, nurse midwife or midwife. A RN or LPN are great for a lot of different types of care, but I wouldn't think they would be qualified to be the sole care provider for prenatal care.

ElTrain5 · May 2014

mrsdbc said:

For sheer novelty value I am going to play ball for a moment.
My OB has four doctors and a midwife. The docs are males and the midwife is a midwife (is there such a thing as a midhusband?)

"Midwife" actually means "With woman", so it can apply to either a male or female practitioner. I've never heard of a male midwife before, but I think it'd be pretty awesome, and there have to be a few out there, right?

Dawn5481 · May 2014

I'm not usually snarky, but how bout you have the hubs deliver the kid. Both of you should feel more comfortable.

Wyn · May 2014

Unfortunately, the reality is: You get who you get and you don't throw a fit. Think of it this way, unless you've got the dough to have someone on retainer, you are a cog in the machine. So pick the machine (practice) you are most comfortable with. This is exactly why I'm planning to deliver at a birth center (great nurses), with a midwife (2 in the practice) and the back up doc/hospital is very natural birth friendly. But that's just me...

WashingtonQueen · May 2014

Every time I get on this thread from mobile I get a cheesy Bahamas vacation ad at the bottom.

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