Music with swears

jesuisfatiguee · May 2014

This board clearly does not talk about music enough. Also, I think using the noun "swear" in its plural form is funny.

So, do you listen to music with swears? How much do you shelter your LOs from hearing music with swears, if at all? Is there an age at which you think some swearing/cussing/foul language is appropriate in music?

I try to keep it to very, very little around DS, and I don't listen to any of the rap I like when he's around. I just wonder if I should be more careful when someone drops an occasional S or F bomb in a song that's playing in the background. What do you think?

Drea926 · May 2014

DH and I have started paring down listening to music or having TV on in the background that could have swears. Neither of us swear too much any more, but we've been making an effort too. I think our LOs are still kind of little, but we're just trying to get in the habit now.

DublinMama · May 2014

I don't listen to a ton of music with swears. If I do, DS isn't around. More than songs being inappropriate, I actually have to do some improving myself. My language can get colorful, and I do not want to have that terribly awkward and embarrassing MOTY conversation with my DCP if DS ever drops some word he's heard without a doubt from DH or me at home.

:-SS X_X

Drea926 · May 2014

luxannie said:

This is partially UO/FFC/Sanctimommy but I can't help but think that parents are trashy when their babies blurt out bad words. A friend's 2.5 year old was on the verge of getting kicked out of daycare for saying naughty words and his dad thought it hilarious. Me and DH just had a field day after hearing that.

This is probably coming from the mom of a boy who will yell out "WTF, asshole" at kids on the playground...

I know what you mean though. When DH and I would watch old episodes of Supernanny with little kids swearing up a storm - we are all smug like "They had to have learned that from their parents. Blah Blah Blah We're on our high horse because we don't have children." :P

jesuisfatiguee · May 2014

@DublinMama - that is my fear, too! I don't want DS to be the kid that teaches all the other kids all the naughty words because I say them at home. It's something I have been working on, but I keep screwing up. I also don't want to be a "do as I say not as I do" parent. Because ick

jesuisfatiguee · May 2014

Drea926 said:

luxannie said:

This is partially UO/FFC/Sanctimommy but I can't help but think that parents are trashy when their babies blurt out bad words. A friend's 2.5 year old was on the verge of getting kicked out of daycare for saying naughty words and his dad thought it hilarious. Me and DH just had a field day after hearing that.

This is probably coming from the mom of a boy who will yell out "WTF, asshole" at kids on the playground...

I know what you mean though. When DH and I would watch old episodes of Supernanny with little kids swearing up a storm - we are all smug like "They had to have learned that from their parents. Blah Blah Blah We're on our high horse because we don't have children." :P

I'm feelin' this. All of it lol

TarheelMama202 · May 2014

I love music with the swears, but don't listen to it around DS. Rap is my fave! In the car with DS we only listen to classical or NPR. Pin a rose on my smug nose!

jesuisfatiguee · May 2014

TarheelMama202 said:

I love music with the swears, but don't listen to it around DS. Rap is my fave! In the car with DS we only listen to classical or NPR. Pin a rose on my smug nose!

We're classical commuters, too! Except on the weekends, when the local station plays opera. I can't do most opera.

DublinMama · May 2014

lol My kid has an extreme hatred for the car unlike anything I've seen in my life. So he watches movies. MOTY. Even then that doesn't always work. So I spend most car rides listening to "Mickey and Donald have a farm, Meeska, Mouska Do!!" ad nauseum while my son pitches an A1 nutty.

Puck1182 · May 2014

Most of the music I listen to doesn't have terribly explicit lyrics, but I do try to limit DDs exposure to bad language. But I mostly just make my own "radio edit" version by turning the volume down when I know a swear is coming up.

That said, I don't worry too much about content, since I know a lot of inappropriate/suggestive lyrics went waaaay over my head when I was a kid. I listened to a lot of Billy Joel growing up and I think I was out of high school when I listened to "The Entertainer" and was like, "We're the hell did THESE lyrics come from?!?"

So I'm no too concerned about, say, DD losing her innocence because last night she decided "Flagpole Sitta" is her new favorite song (especially since Harvey Danger is one of our all-time favorite bands), but I am a little bit worried about when she can start singing along. SHE won't know the entire first verse is about masturbating, but other people will, so that could get awkward... But I don't recalled anyone being scandalized by me singing "I've played all kinds of palaces and laid all kinds of girls" when I was a kid either, so who knows? ;-)

wholenewworld · May 2014

I have been thinking about this lately. We listen to pandora a lot at home, so you never really know what is coming. I cringe when the swears come on randomly. He still isn't really talking at all, so we have some time, but soon it will be time to change up our act.

tamarar5 · May 2014

Most country music is pretty tame, they might say ass, but that's pretty much it. But my DH slips sometimes and swears in front of the kids. We're pretty careful about censoring our own language... but the rest of the world is not.

SummerLove21 · May 2014

I'll turn off more explicit music most of the time, but it's not even a question when LO is in the car. I've been working on my potty mouth around him too, although I fear the damage has been done after I was so frustrated with cheer last year.

Honestly, I am all about "when you turn 18, you can do whatever you want." Until then, I'll probably be a nag about inappropriate music with DS. And he and his friends will probably drive around town blasting it at top volume. LOL.

jesuisfatiguee · May 2014

lilsebastian said:

I love the word "swears."

IKR???

singingsea · May 2014

I try to avoid music with swear words that are super obvious. Other than that I don't make a fuss about the words figuring little man will pay more attention anyway if I do.

kbates85 · May 2014

Meh, I'm not really worried about it. I mostly listen to the popular music stations in the car and there is swearing but the more vulgar stuff is bleeped out. I figure that in the not to distant future DS will be dictating what's in the radio so I'll listen to what I want while I still can.

Rynleigh · May 2014

I don't give a flying fuck about the words used LOL but I do care about keeping the house free from really depressing/violent music. While I do enjoy a huge array of music that does tend to include darker stuff, I don't like the kids being regularly exposed to music that insinuates violence (especially against women), drug use, theft, etc. I have no problems with music that involves sexual themes as long as those themes are not excessively explicit or degrading.

I honestly just don't care about words. People who refuse to say "shit", but regularly say "crap", are seen as pretty hypocritical in my eyes. Same connotation. Same intent. I don't somehow magically respect you more for using "crap" as a means of censorship (if you abstain from all negative words in your language, or use both kinds of words interchangeably, fabulous. You may remain free of the hypocrite label). BUT I am also against casual flinging of insults... whether you say "You are a shithead" or "You are a crapface" doesn't matter, to me... those are both mean things to say and neither one is worse than the other.

But I'm also that person who's kid will happily correct you when you use a pseudoswear, too

(ex: Aurielle, at the age of four, was once walking to the bus stop with her childcare provider, to pick up other kids. The provider stubbed her toe on a rock, and said, "Gosh darnit!". Aurielle patted her hand and said, "You mean, 'God dammit'..." - and I laughed about it for days) - so my opinion only means so much.

singingsea · May 2014

So I'm the only parent who lets their kid listen to nine inch nails?

Specific songs that is.

I find music with darker emotional tones beautiful not depressing I guess. Music is uber important to me so I'm constantly exposing him to different sounds. We listen to a lot of instrumental stuff too. Then on a dime we switch to Katy Perry cause that's how we role.

wifeofadam · May 2014

I don't listen to that kind of music, so by default my kids don't listen to it either. I think music has the power to influence emotions, so I'm very careful about what we listen to in our house. Like @Rynleigh said, I don't want my kids listening to depressing or violent (or overtly sexual) music, because I don't want it stirring up those emotions in them. I know that music had that power over me at times as a young person.

Anyways, we listen to mostly contemporary Christian music, some oldies, and a little Classical. I've been trying to listen to more Classical because of DS' violin lessons. I loathe kiddy music and just can't bring myself to do it in the car. Most of the time in the car the music is off anyways. That's when the kids and I do most of our talking. I find that car rides bring up the best conversations because they see so much outside the window that they don't understand.

At home I try to keep the music positive and focused on the Lord, because I feel like it helps my mood and keeps me from getting impatient and irritated with the kids.

Puck1182 · May 2014

@+adamwife+ - Seconded on the kiddie music! The only exceptions to that rule is Tom Lehrer (DH played "The Elements" for her when she was still very tiny and she loved it) and Captain Bogg and Salty (they opened for Harvey Danger once and it was surprisingly awesome, but they usually played at school and libraries, and now two of the guys do the live action musical sequences for Jake and the Neverland Pirates). And anything from a Jim Henson show or movie.

Ok, so I take it back. I do like some kiddie music. But it's only really specific stuff that I would listen to whether I had DD or not. I don't play it solely for her benefit, but I am fully capitalizing on the fact that I control her world right now to shape her musical tastes. I didn't really listen I much kiddie music when I was a child either though. From the time I was a toddler, I was mostly into The Beatles, Harry Chapin, Carly Simon, and Billy Joel, because that's what my parents played.

Funny thing I just realized though: of all the music I listen to, I think Broadway stuff will prove to be the most problematic in introducing to DD. Maybe not so much the old stuff like Irving Berlin or Cole Porter (although Cole Porter's lyrics ARE pretty suggestive, just not outright crude or overtly sexual most of the time), but the modern stuff, like Ragtime, Rent, or Spring Awakening. Or even Les Mis. She will at least be in middle school before we go there I think. Between the content and the language, I don't want her repeating those lyrics before she's old enough to actually understand what they mean.

Drea926 · May 2014

UO - I am not bothered by kids music in the slightest :P

Drea926 · May 2014

This is off topic but I love the Curious George soundtrack which is all Jack Johnson tunes. Very mellow and kid-friendly. I downloaded it when I used to teach kids' yoga.

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