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Faith Friday

schulme2schulme2 member
in Late Term and Child Loss
“But for you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings. And you will go out and leap like calves released from the stall” (Malachi 4:2).

Do you feel like this journey has brought you closer to or further from God?

Do you think you know more about who God is or have you second guessed what you thought you knew?

Any new struggles/revelations this week?
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Re: Faith Friday

  • diamante1181diamante1181 member
    **bfp mentioned**

    I personally have second-guessed every facet of my entire life after losing Sophie and Gabriel. I don't know what I know now, honestly. It seems to me that God takes care of the big things, like good vs evil etc, but leaves all the miscellaneous things to us. I hope to be wrong but that is what it looks like right now.

    New struggle is I don't know how I will survive this pregnancy. I love the twins very much, I don't want them to think that I am trying to "replace" or forget them, because I never could. Is that silly? And I am definitely afraid that I could go through the same thing again. It's hard to be hopeful for a rainbow. 
    On 10/23/13 Baby Sophie and Baby Gabriel born at 21+5 weeks. They grew wings and flew away from us. May God bless them always. We love you beans!
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    Phoebe Jaslene born at 19w3d. We love you beba! Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers



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  • LyndseyTSLyndseyTS member
    @diamante1181‌ That's not silly at all. This is some freaking crazy stuff to deal with. “But for you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings. And you will go out and leap like calves released from the stall” (Malachi 4:2). Do you feel like this journey has brought you closer to or further from God? Honestly, I yo-yo back and forth between the two. Some days I feel closer and some days I just feel mad (which is like being far away, I guess). Do you think you know more about who God is or have you second guessed what you thought you knew? I think that I know based on experience now, more than before. I never thought that God was a wish-granting fairy that let everything go well as long as you earned it, so that hasn't changed. He lets things happens and I do believe that He can bring good out of them and that in His ideal world no one would die (including our beautiful children). I guess the short answer is no to both. I just feel frustrated that I don't know what He wants me to do with this. Any new struggles/revelations this week? I'm just feeling so incredibly worn. I'm back at work full-time, which sometimes seems great and sometimes feels like the stupidest decision I've made in awhile. I feel like life is spinning and I'm watching. I feel like I have no control over anything and it's the most frustrating thing.
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
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