Anyone NOT using Doula?

silverwings72 · May 2014

Sometimes I feel as though I'm the only one not using a doula? I live in the Bay Area and the price for a doula is ridiculously $$$. I feel like my mother and husband can be just as supportive and we can educate ourselves on the rest. Do we bite the bullet and pay? Do we do it ourselves? Agh! Anxious, confused, and a little cray-cray FTM looking for some advice.

SarahHeck · May 2014

I didn't have a doula last time. Won't this time either. People got along centuries without them. Your body will know what to do.

MollMoll4 · May 2014

No doula for me either! Just my OB and DH

MrsLillyG · May 2014

I am not! It is not my type of thing.

Eta:I am going med free

mander82 · May 2014

I am not even 100% sure what that is......is that just someone that you pay to hold your hand and talk you through the pain of labor?

maybe teaches you how to breath, or push or something ?

I will not have a doula.

icaughtfire · May 2014

I don't even know what a doula is. Some kind of child birth coach? I won't be using one.

PineApple85 · May 2014

I didn't and I told SO to take a nap (I labored all night long). It sucked but it wasn't unbearable. I'm assuming you are planning med free; in my opinion, if you are not trying for med free I don't feel like a doula is necessary.

mrsodonnell12 · May 2014

I'mhaving a home birth with no doula. I have babies fast so don't feel it's necessary. Plus I like to sort of be alone if that makes sense. I'm considering getting a post partum doula though.

abbyful · May 2014

I'm not.

Thought about it with DS, we even interviewed one, didn't like her contract. ($600, non-refundable if she missed the birth. Oh yeah, she missed the first time we were supposed to meet, and the second time she was late.)

DH & I took Bradley Method classes, and he was great during DS's birth!

KatzKiss · May 2014

IMHO, whether you go the midwife route or the OB route, a midwife and a nurse can and do do anything a doula can.

KLKilgore · May 2014

Since I just had to Google it to figure out what it was...no, I will not.

absolutelymaybe · May 2014

Nope and I don't know anyone who has used one.

missnacholover · May 2014

I am not. I'll be in the hospital with all those medical folks.

TeeJ526 · May 2014

Nah, I don't feel like I need one. My OB will do just fine.

mrsodonnell12 · May 2014

I should add - if I was having a hospital pirth or my first two labors were longer I would 100% get a doula. They are amazing.

maple1422 · May 2014

No doula here

mussalynn · May 2014

I am getting a doula, but don't have anything against anyone who's not getting one.

We had one lined up for my first pregnancy but then ended up having a c-section so we didn't really get a chance to use her. I did labour for 5 hours before getting into the operating room though, and everything DH learned in prenatal classes about coaching me and helping me through the pain went straight out the window, so I think I'm going to need the doula this time!!

FirstBabyDoyle · May 2014

My sister wants to be my doula. I told her okay but she had to watch ten videos of my choice of live births, business end only. Three videos in and she was out.

mrsransom · May 2014

Although I do know someone who is a doula, they are not common here & none of my friends who are Moms have used one. I didn't use one last time, because I am just not crunchy at all, & I ended up with a c-section anyway, which will be repeated this time. I guess they are good if you don't think your husband will handle it well, and you are planning on trying to go med free.

Carebella · May 2014

I'm strongly considering a doula for many reasons. I want to try to have a medicine free birth and they are well versed in what tricks can help with different types of pain. The only people I'd want in the room are my husband, the mid-wife and potentially my mom. But my mom lives in another state so there are no guarantees that she could get here in time. So as a FTM, I like the idea or having someone there who can keep an eye on my husband if things go long and/or keep me company if he needs a break. And if we are in labor after the birth center hours and need to transfer to the hospital the midwife might not be able to come along if someone else is in labor but a doula will.

It's definitely not a requirement but for some people, and us, it could make sense.

ZAFrisbie · May 2014

I won't be using a doula, but DH and I signed up for Bradley Method classes.

CountryMama1114 · May 2014

My aunt is a doula and was in the room with me when DD was born. I honestly don't remember if she even "doula-ed" (is that a word?) me. I can honestly say I didn't listen to a thin anyone said to me and kind of went into myself. (Unmedicated birth)

I don't plan on getting one this time around, either.

melissajam · May 2014

I'm glad that I didn't bother with a doula last time. My (unmedicated) labor was only three hours long (two hours of which were spent traveling to the hospital), so I feel like it would have been a waste of not only money but the doula's time. I was also completely in my own world the entire time, so I wouldn't have been listening to her anyway. I will not use one this time either.

Celticlass6 · May 2014

No doula here, but I'm considering signing up with DH for the Bradley Method classes.

wallygirl · May 2014

I'm not. I didn't last time either. I had a complicated labor and my husband was amazing.

mamameg11 · May 2014

My mom suggested I should think about getting a doula this pregnancy...um, mom, this will be my 3rd c section, she can't really do anything for me!! I don't think my mom has any idea what a doula actually does lol!

KatzKiss · May 2014

lissydee said:

KatzKiss said:

IMHO, whether you go the midwife route or the OB route, a midwife and a nurse can and do do anything a doula can.

not necessarily true. As a labor nurse, yes I do provide labor support, my I am also responsible for a lot of charting, monitoring baby's strip, monitoring mom's vitals, administering meds (if you want/need them) and assessing for side effects. I can't be 100% hands on when I have to multitask. Hospital midwives may also have many patients laboring at the same time and/or shuffling between the hospital and the clinic for office hours. So they too cannot be 100% with you throughout the labor either. This is where a doula can fill in.

I must have been lucky then. There was a nurse in the room giving me support whenever I needed one.

mussalynn · May 2014

ZAFrisbie said:

I won't be using a doula, but DH and I signed up for Bradley Method classes.

Yes. If you don't want a doula, I would highly recommend Bradley method classes (or any classes really), just so you're familiar with the stages/phases of labour, what's normal during labour etc. The more knowledge the better IMO.

JustJainey · May 2014

No doula for me either. Although DH has been having ideas that make my head shake. He used to have a cow/calf operation and occasionally will day things like, " I think I could do it" And I humour him and ask "Do what?" He says, " The delivery...".

I might be driving myself to the hospital *lol*

harmonicbabe26 · May 2014

Had to read the title again to make sure I wasn't confused. No, definitely not using a doula. Didn't use one first time around. What makes you think they are such a must??

staugustinewedding · May 2014

No doula here! I have a really great, well respected dr and my husband who I know will be my rock.. That's all I need!

DoubleUp8 · May 2014

FirstBabyDoyle said:

My sister wants to be my doula. I told her okay but she had to watch ten videos of my choice of live births, business end only. Three videos in and she was out.

Three's not bad!

I am considering a doula, not sure if we can afford it. The Bradley Classes in our area are half the cost of doula services. DH and I are still talking about our options.

Melissa2216 · May 2014

Econosaurus said:

"No midwives, no doulas, and bring on the science".

This is totally me. BTW, I hate the word doula. I hate the way it looks and I hate the way it sounds.

brooklyngirl18 · May 2014

no doula here. i plan to be in a hospital with drugs

KatzKiss · May 2014

silverwings72 said:

Sometimes I feel as though I'm the only one not using a doula? I live in the Bay Area and the price for a doula is ridiculously $$$. I feel like my mother and husband can be just as supportive and we can educate ourselves on the rest. Do we bite the bullet and pay? Do we do it ourselves? Agh! Anxious, confused, and a little cray-cray FTM looking for some advice.

If you do decide to get a doula, do a lot of research. They don't have to have any training or certification. Basically, anyone can call themselves a doula and legally charge you for their "service". They can't conduct medical procedures, but they can guide you on decisions you make about medical interventions which could potentially be dangerous. I'm not trying to sway you away from it, I just want you to be aware. GL.

lizgrace03 · May 2014

Not planning on it unless a compelling reason to spend the extra money arises. Planning to take some classes to help DH and I become educated ourselves.

MrsDL · May 2014

Nope - didn't with my son. I did take a hypnobabies course in lieu of Bradley with DS which I found helpful, but when the time came I found DH, my OB, and an anesthesiologist who administered a perfect epidural more helpful. It's a personal choice but I don't think it's necessarily and know more people who have gotten along perfectly fine without one (although the ladies I know who used one were quite happy with the outcome).

runningmama14 · May 2014

Melissa2216 said:

Econosaurus said:

"No midwives, no doulas, and bring on the science".

This is totally me. BTW, I hate the word doula. I hate the way it looks and I hate the way it sounds.

A CNM has lots of "science" training... Totally different than a doula in most cases.

MrsAdventure · May 2014

JustJainey said:

No doula for me either. Although DH has been having ideas that make my head shake. He used to have a cow/calf operation and occasionally will day things like, " I think I could do it" And I humour him and ask "Do what?" He says, " The delivery...". I might be driving myself to the hospital *lol*

Lol, DH is a cattle rancher and jokes about this all the time with my OB. Though I find it funny, truth be told, I know he could get me through it by himself if for some reason it came to that. He's always been solid as a rock in any sort of crisis.

As for a doula, not for me. Between my OB, DH and my mom, I will be properly looked after and well supported so I feel like a doula would be a waste of money. Doulas are however becoming rather popular. But it live in a very 'free spirited' part of the country, where crunch is all the rage (:|

alysonmh · May 2014

No doula last time and no doula this time. I have better things to spend my money on with a new baby coming. Nothing me and my husband can't handle.

DVGirl · May 2014

I'm still on the fence. This will be our first and we will probably be the first in both our families to deliver in a birth center. We need all the knowledge and support we can get.

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