December 2014 Moms

Gender reveal party - what are your thoughts?

I know it's a little early but I'm such a planner so I've been thinking about it. I think a gender reveal party is fun and it would be great to find out in front of my closest family and friends.

However, I've heard people say it's too excessive and having a shower is enough celebration.

Share with me what you think!
Pregnant with #2

IVF cycle 1 (Nov 2013)- freeze all d/t OHSS
FET #1-BFN
FET #2-BFP baby girl born Dec 2014
FET #3-Sept 2017 BFP but miscarried at 6 weeks

IVF cycle 2 (Oct 2017)- freeze all again d/t OHSS
FET #1 BPF, pregnant with a singleton due Sept 2018


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Re: Gender reveal party - what are your thoughts?

  • We'll be having one for our immediate family.  It's the first grandbaby so everyone is SO excited! It will only be around 10 people (my parents are divorced, and this includes my and MHs siblings).  I think it will be fun. 
    DS  12-1-2014
    DD 10-29-2016
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  • I love the idea but if I do it it will just be with my immediate family.
  • I think it is a great idea if you want to do it. You should enjoy your pregnancy any way you can/want. With that being said, I will not be having a gender reveal party BC it just isn't me. I'd love to go to one though.
  • I would only do it with my kids and husband.
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  • ZAP12ZAP12 member
    I am not a fan and would never have one. That said, if a friend of mine planned one and invited me, I would go and celebrate with her. I would not side eye one bit because that's what she chose.
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  • kath16kath16 member
    nope. not my thing. actually i've only attended one. 

    my perspective is that it doesn't truly affect anything -- it doesn't really matter to me if my friend has a boy or a girl, i'll still love/spoil them the same. it MIGHT affect the stuff I buy for them but even then, not really until they're a little older. 

    we are planning to find out the sex and might do something special for my step daughter and the grandparents, but it will not be a party. it will be something along the lines of bringing over pink/blue cupcakes (because CUPCAKES)


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  • I've been to one, it was cute! They were pretty casual about it though. We voted on our prediction as we came in and then it was just a big BBQ until they sliced into the colored cake after dinner. :) it was sweet to see their reactions to the news though.

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  • NMS, but plenty love them. If I go to one, I am pissed if I learn that the parents-to-be knew the sex prior to the party. If here's any joy to be had in these little shindigs, IMO, it's seeing the parents' surprise when they find out for the first time.

    I find them superfluous, but you don't in any way need to make or decision to please anyone other than you and SO.

    Seeing my sister's surprise at hers is actually what made me not want to have one. You could tell she was really overwhelmed and wanting to process, but she was surrounded by my super loud, celebrating family.

    I think they are fine with immediate family, but I wouldn't have one. I will enjoy the surprise with just my husband in the ultrasound room.


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  • megbmegmegbmeg member
    I used to think these were ridiculous, but now I think it seems like a fun excuse to get together with whoever would be into this (family, maybe a few friends) and just enjoy it. I think the cake reveal idea is cute. Here is another cute idea with the reveal in balloons. 
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  • My DH and I are doing it. We've been very open about our struggles with our previous losses and our family (even extended family) and friends are just as excited about our pregnancy as we are about this. It was brought up to me and the more I thought about it and researched ideas the more I wanted to do it. It will be very casual and a great mid-summer get together that just happens to be baby themed haha. I think it's adorable and I love all the games that you can play. Some people don't like them but I know for my family and friends it's become expected after it was mentioned once. I'm really excited to celebrate this milestone in the pregnancy with everyone.
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  • I'm on the fence. I'm a FTM, so it would be exciting to share with all the family in a fun way, but they seem excessive to me at the same time. We'll see when we get close to that date what we decide.

    I do love the cute picture ideas for social media & personal memories. I will definitely do something like that.

    DS1: 12/17/2014
    DS2: born sleeping at 26 weeks on 8/8/2016 due to chromosomal deletion
    Pregnant with baby 3 -  EDD 9/14/2017

  • I plan on taking a cute photo to let our friends and family know but nothing else.
    Wife. Boy mom x6. Expecting #7. Wannabe homesteader.
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  • I love all the gender reveal stuff. I was going to combine the two because I do think it's excessive, but my sister wants to throw me a small gender reveal with family only and then a baby shower with family and friends later on, so that's our plan.
  • Nope never. I'm just not that kind of person.

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  • byrne15byrne15 member

    I never had one before....

    BUT, I think we might do one this time.  I am obviously not having a shower and will hopefully not receive any gifts at such a party.  I think it would be fun to have a cake and find out with the rest of my family.  This is my last baby, so I might as well get a cake!

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  • I think a gender reveal party AND a shower is over kill. We aren't doing a shower this time around so we might do a small dinner celebration with friends and let balloons out of a box or something. Nothing crazy.
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  • Htle07Htle07 member
    Never been to one before, but I think it would be fun if we have a dinner with close family members and surprise them through a certain colored cake or something simple. I would not throw a party just for the purpose though.
  • Not really my thing but MIL wants us to do some kind of production for her.  It's her first grandkid so she is super excited.  For my parents this is #10.  They are happy for us but excitement is hard when they've done this 9 times before.

     

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  • I think a cute announcement is sufficient. It seems excessive to me. Especially because my dad doesn't want to know, and I wouldn't want to leave him out of any celebrations.
  • I'm going to do it--I think-- and call it a Boy or Girl BBQ. I picture it just being our family and best friends. We can do the whole cut the cake and find out thing-- no gifts please! I will do it as an excuse to throw a party in the summer and see my close friends and family-- and I don't really know what it means when people say that they're "not that kind of person.." You don't like cake and socialization?
    I like attention as much as the next guy but I don't think having a gender reveal classifies as AW-- if it is done correctly.
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  • I had an early baby shower with my family while I was visiting for Christmas because I wasn't going to make it back home again before the baby was born. It was a week after my anatomy ultrasound so my sister dyed the cake blue to announce it at the shower. I wouldn't go out of my way to do a reveal party, this time we will just announce it on FB.
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  • jleigh814 said:

    NMS, but plenty love them. If I go to one, I am pissed if I learn that the parents-to-be knew the sex prior to the party. If here's any joy to be had in these little shindigs, IMO, it's seeing the parents' surprise when they find out for the first time.

    I find them superfluous, but you don't in any way need to make or decision to please anyone other than you and SO.

    Seeing my sister's surprise at hers is actually what made me not want to have one. You could tell she was really overwhelmed and wanting to process, but she was surrounded by my super loud, celebrating family.

    I think they are fine with immediate family, but I wouldn't have one. I will enjoy the surprise with just my husband in the ultrasound room.
    Makes complete sense, and I totally agree. It's the very reason I wouldn't do one, too. I'm made uncomfortable opening Christmas gifts in front of family members, for goodness' sake!

    If someone is going to make a production of it, though, I wouldn't want have it sold to me as a work of nonfiction only to learn later that the surprise was a charade. I have gone to one of these (where the surprise was feigned) and a wedding that was presented as the actual union when, in reality, they'd married at a courthouse months earlier out of fear over living in sin. I'm fine with people doing whatever, just don't tell me you've invited me because you love me then lie to me. Blech.
    With that one sentence you might have changed my mind. For some reason I didn't think about that aspect. In fact, I hadn't factored our reaction in it at all. I have a tendency to focus in what others want until it's too late to focus on what I want. Well shoot. Maybe a cute announcement is all we'll do now haha
    Crap. My MIL and dad will be so disappointed.
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  • NMS. Especially since I'm hoping to find the willpower to go Team Green this time. However, I would attend if a friend/family member had one. I think it's excessive but I wouldn't be too hard on them.
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  • ebilbaoebilbao member
    Are people expected to bring gifts to gender reveals? If so, they are excessive. If not, have at it.
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  • AdorebAdoreb member

    Ive only been to one and it was super cute. I dont think ill do one myself, but go for it!

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  • TETO, but it's definitely NMS.  

    That said, I do think that instead of having the US tech just tell us in the room, I'll probably ask her to put it in an envelope and then we may get like, an 8" cake baked to reveal the gender to just the two of us after a nice dinner at home or something.  That just seems more special than being told this huge news while my feet are in the stirrups.

    Of course, I'm still fighting with DH to be team green, but I will likely lose that battle.
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  • I think it's too much. My pregnancy is not the center of everyone's universe. They don't need to come to ANOTHER party for my kid. Even if you say no gifts, people will feel obligated to bring gifts. I also know of two people that actually got UPSET when they found out the gender which makes me sick. My sister did one last year and it was just weird.

    But I'm not big into parties where people buy you stuff you should be paying for yourself anyway so maybe you shouldn't listen to me. ;)

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  • We generally have a 4th of July party at our house and that is around when we should find out what we are having.This also falls around mine and DH's birthdays and is a fun time for our families to get together. I thought it might be cute to do a reveal then. Maybe something with colored sparklers or a present for both of us to open. This could all totally go awry if little sprout doesn't cooperate during the u/s!
  • With DD we did a very small intimate dinner (no party!) with our parents, siblings, and two best friends. We cut into the cake and found out she was a girl. It's one of my best memories from my pregnancy.

    This time around, we're going back and forth on doing something similar with family or something similar with just the two of us. It's still up in the air at the moment...

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  • ajlmomajlmom member
    Thanks for all your response ladies. I think I'll do one but it will be small. It'll probably be a BBQ with just immediate families and a few close friends, no gifts! It's just an excuse to get ppl together since it'll be summer time when I'm almost 20 weeks.

    There's been a lot of pressure on us to get pregnant for the past 2-3 years and I think my IL and parents will like a little special reveal. I also struggled with IF so celebration is important! I guess if my closest friends can't be happy for me and think I'm over kill then let it be.
    Pregnant with #2

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    FET #1-BFN
    FET #2-BFP baby girl born Dec 2014
    FET #3-Sept 2017 BFP but miscarried at 6 weeks

    IVF cycle 2 (Oct 2017)- freeze all again d/t OHSS
    FET #1 BPF, pregnant with a singleton due Sept 2018


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  • Not for me. I'm not comfortable being the center of attention. I was uncomfortable at my baby shower. I have attended one for my friends and I was happy for them.



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  • erynpdxerynpdx member
    I might be into the immediate families only BBQ, would probably not even tell them we were going to reveal but insist on bringing dessert or something like that.  No presents or anything, just a good excuse to get everyone together and guilt my dad into bbqing ribs.  We'll see how it all pans out though, still a long way off!
  • Kmm1023Kmm1023 member
    I would with our immediate family. But just hey come over for coffee and cake sort of thing. There hasn't been a baby in DH's family for 14 years so everyone is pretty excited!
  • JgdrakeJgdrake member
    My husband and I are going to have one for just the two of us. On my side this is number four and on his side this is number 7. Like someone else mentioned, it's hard to get that initial excitement. But since it is our first we wanted to do a cake just for us and have that special moment for the two of us to share. Ill definitely post a picture of the icing afterwards for everyone to see on Facebook. I personally don't see anything wrong with them. It's just not my cup of tea.
  • ColeyCannoliColeyCannoli member
    edited May 2014
    I would just make the gender reveal part of the shower. Honestly, I am at that point where it seems like all of my friends and family members are having babies or getting married and the party after party after party does get old. I would probably chose to either attend the shower or the reveal, not both, if you were one of my friends. No offense or anything, I'd still be excited about it, but I'd be happier to just go to one big party with everyone else. I think that's something to remember too. Even if your friends are excited about everything, I'm willing to bet giving them two party announcements will end up with people split between the two events. 

    But I guess that really depends on what your friends are like and how big of a deal you make it. As long as you are clear that no one has to buy extra gifts and stuff, I'm sure it would be a lot of fun.
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  • MeetherMeether member
    I think they are fun. My friends and I go to them, we love to celebrate whatever anyone's celebrating. I won't be doing one because it's too much work to plan but I don't think it's AW. I was sick terribly until the end of 2t last time, and This pregnancy seems to be going in that direction. Sooo, I'd rather just pass out on my bed on Any given day than plan another party lol. I'll probably do a cute photo announcement with dd if it's a girl. She has her outfit planned and everything.
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  • I'm planning to do one with this baby. But not so much specifically for gender reveal. We should find out in August and we always have a Labor Day cookout so I plan on doing the reveal there when we are ready to serve dessert. I think people would enjoy the extra little bonus. Lol. I may not even announce it. Just cut and give them slices if pink or blue cake. Lol. If they ask them we will say something. Lol. But I LOVE the idea.
  • drpayne said:
    Nope nope nope.  No one cares about the sex of your baby the way you do.  I could maybe understand doing one for immediate family.  Otherwise I think it's excessive and attention-whorish.  It's also so overdone.  I don't see anything original now - just pink or blue balloons or cake filling.  Just nms. 
    A high point in living in a third world country.  NOBODY here has ever even heard of such a thing.  Yep, I'm bringing the over-done-ness down to South America. Hahaha, they'll think I'm so creative  :P
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