At what age is it okay to...

bensmommy518 · April 2014

Leave a child in the car while you run into the store to do an errand (think post office or bank, not grocery shopping).

This poll was prompted by a conversation I had with my husband last night. I was supposed to drop a package off at the post office and I decided not to becasue DS (age 2 1/2) had fallen asleep in the car and I did not want to try to wake him up and manage him and the baby and the package in the post office. He said I should have just left him sleeping in the car and run in with the baby. I said he was too young to do that.

SarahA918 · April 2014

I think all of those are too young!!! Maybe ten?!

MiaMyPuggle · April 2014

I couldn't do this. Maybe at like 8? I would love to do things during the day, but then decide not to bc I don't want to buckle them in, take them out, buckle them in again and take them out. It's a pain in the ass.

monkeybutt61612 · April 2014

My mom left me in the car once with it running (6 or 7) and I put it in reverse and rammed into a pole. I'd like to avoid all things related to that for as long as possible.

sugarland726 · April 2014

Never. Even 8 and 9 year olds get abducted.

MJamison1020 · April 2014

I've just heard too many horror stories to take doing this lightly. I think I would wait until I was comfortable with leaving them at home alone before letting them stay in the car alone. This may seem extreme and I may change my tune later in life but... .for now... none of those ages make me comfortable!

bensmommy518 · April 2014

sugarland726 said:

Never. Even 8 and 9 year olds get abducted.

See this is me too. I am firmly in the never camp - I cant even leave them alone in the car to return my shopping cart unless I am parked directly next to the shopping cart return corral. DH (and several of my friends) think this is extreme. I am glad to hear I am not being too unreasonable.

I do remember my mom leaving us in the car when she would run into the store and nothing happened but It was a very different world 30 years ago.

pinkyxboo · April 2014

Never never never. Too many unpredictables.

somewierd_person · April 2014

It's illegal to leave a child in a car, running or not under the age of 13. If they aren't legal to be home without supervision then you can't leave them in the car either. I agree that it's a pain in the ass to run errands and have to do the in and out of the car a bunch but it's the safest way to have your kids with you. Plus cars can get super hot even in mild weather and you never know who might see your child alone in the car as an opportunity. Especially if they know how to get out of their seat and open doors you don't know what could happen.

peanutmuse · April 2014

monkeybutt61612 said:

My mom left me in the car once with it running (6 or 7) and I put it in reverse and rammed into a pole. I'd like to avoid all things related to that for as long as possible.

I did this too, actually. I think I was 7.

But I'd say 8. All of those ages are way too young!

monkeybutt61612 · April 2014

@somewierd_person‌ is there a law where you are about leaving kids home alone? I always thought it was a use your judgement thing

somewierd_person · April 2014

California, and yes I believe there is. Obviously if you have a mature child close to that age I think it's reasonable to use your judgement for short periods of time. As one of four children I know I was left home alone before that age but like pp have said we live in a different time.

katags · April 2014

Uh, not until they are a teenager. I wouldn't even fathom leaving a young child unattended in a car.

MrsGraham06 · April 2014

I would only consider it in my hometown, never in a city.

My boys are 6 and 7, they aren't that bad to bring into the store/post office/pick up pizza, etc. My 3 YO is the PITA to take inside anywhere.

Lena122 · April 2014

I said never but realistically probably 10 or so. Maybe older depending on their maturity.

Cormelbaby · April 2014

monkeybutt61612 said:
My mom left me in the car once with it running (6 or 7) and I put it in reverse and rammed into a pole. I'd like to avoid all things related to that for as long as possible.

Totally did this too. I say 8 or 9 without the keys in there.

angiek1 · April 2014

I put never, but really I would not do it until my child was 10-11 yrs old. It is illegal in my state (Nebraska) to leave a kid under the age of 8 (or some age around there) in a car unattended. I have heard SO many stories about people running into the gas station for a hot minute and having the cops called b/c they left their child alone in the car. Now those people have to fight with CPS. While it is a huge PITA I'll be taking my girls with me for a long time.

bensmommy518 · April 2014

You guys all made me feel better about not being comfortable with this. I really dont think I was being unreasonable but DH was upset that I didnt just drop the package off (it was something that is time sensitive so I understand his concern but I was just not willing to do it.

@Bookshelves to be honest it is a concern that I have now, and will be a topic of future discussions between me and him. He already knows how I feel but like I said earlier he things I worry too much about things sometimes. It has never really been an issue before and honestly the times he takes the kids anywhere without me are very few becasue he works crazy hours and usually when he is alone with the kids it is in the evenings when not much is open or he is taking them to his parents house where I know they have eyes on them.

wifetomrb101 · April 2014

When DD1 was the only child, never. Now that I have 2 I will run into the post office. But I always turn the vehicle off, and lock the doors. I take the keys and my phone with me. The post office is the only place I'll do this, and only if I have to grab the mail out of the box, not grab a package. I feel safe because I have my keys with me, they're both buckled in carseats and the door are locked. Once DD1 gets older and can get out of her booster seat and unlock the doors I won't leave them alone anymore.

ETA: If it's hot outside I won't leave them alone for even a minute. Then I just skip the post office errands or make DH do it.

mrsjenni · April 2014

20. Maybe.

CopperT0p · April 2014

I think it is illegal here in Ontario to leave them under the age of 12 but I don't know for a fact. I think I heard that in the news a couple years ago.
We are lucky that DS1 would stay asleep if I had to transfer him. It is a pain but it is something you get used to and plan around.
We won't leave kids in the car until they are teenagers. But I hope they like us enough they will come with us at that age.

Roses87 · April 2014

I vote never per those ages. A teenager? Maybe? Just recently a 6 yr old was left sleeping in a car near me and the parents ran into the store. When they came back she was gone. It's sad that there are so many sickos in our society. They are so vulnerable when sleeping too. Its well worth the tantrum to wake them verses the alternative.

LittleMommaBlueHen · April 2014

It depends on where you live. I would say probably 10 or 11 for my kids, but I grew up in a tiny neighborhood on what was once an island so my parents definitely left me in the car earlier when it came to errands in our neighborhood.

precious72381 · April 2014

When she is old enough to drive me to the post office and wait in the car!!!

Deblondie1 · April 2014

Umm... Never. I'm too paranoid and think that the worst will happen during those few minutes.

ETA: I've done it in my driveway but to me that's different. In my head anyway.

susieandmarty · April 2014

I say never for those suggested ages. In Philly we have kiosk parking. I have to walk 1/2 a block to feed the meter sometimes. I agonize over leaving them in the car when I do this. If I have to walk more then a car length I freak and unless it's cold or bad weather - they come with me or I have eyes on my car the entire time and lock it like 40 times. This is when I'm 10 steps away - can't imagine going in somewhere

COgirl29 · April 2014

Not until they are teenagers. I won't even do it in my driveway.

A couple weeks ago a woman left her sleeping 2year old in the car to run into the gas station bc the credit card scanner was broken at the pump, and a man hijacked her car and took police on a statewide chase. No thank you.

moosebaby2011 · April 2014

In New York the legal age is 8, but I think that is way too young.

valigrl21 · April 2014

Ok so I never ever would if the car was out of my sight. But honestly, I thought about it once. I didn't actually do it, but am still not sure what was the better option. So all of you that said never ever, I want your opinions:

I had my newborn and 2 1/2 year old with me. We went to pick up pizza. I had already ordered it and paid for it online. I parked right by the front door and the pick up is 5 feet from the door. So all together, I was going to be 15 feet (approximately) from the car. No one was in line, so it was going to take me 1-2 minutes to walk in say my order, they grab my pizza and back to the car. Still daylight out.

So I could get both of the car. Get pizza. Now walk back to car with infant seat in one hand, pizza in the other. No free hand for toddler - I am left walking towards a parking lot, just reminding her to stay close, not to run away. Obviously, if I had to, I would have dropped the pizza to chase and grab her.

But in this particular case, is the safest option really to bring them in? I am not talking about how annoying it is to get both girls out of the car, I will do it, if it will keep them safe. But what's more likely - someone to run by, break a window of my car, hot wire it and drive away in under 2 minutes in the middle of the day. Or my toddler to see a balloon 10 miles away floating away, or a random dog across the street or whatever it is that might catch a 2 year olds attention, then her dart into the parking lot and get hit by a car.

FWIW - I went with option 1. And the cashier took pity on me and walked the pizza out to my car for me so I could hold my toddlers hand.

precious72381 · April 2014

valigrl21 said:
Ok so I never ever would if the car was out of my sight. But honestly, I thought about it once. I didn't actually do it, but am still not sure what was the better option. So all of you that said never ever, I want your opinions:

I had my newborn and 2 1/2 year old with me. We went to pick up pizza. I had already ordered it and paid for it online. I parked right by the front door and the pick up is 5 feet from the door. So all together, I was going to be 15 feet (approximately) from the car. No one was in line, so it was going to take me 1-2 minutes to walk in say my order, they grab my pizza and back to the car. Still daylight out.

So I could get both of the car. Get pizza. Now walk back to car with infant seat in one hand, pizza in the other. No free hand for toddler - I am left walking towards a parking lot, just reminding her to stay close, not to run away. Obviously, if I had to, I would have dropped the pizza to chase and grab her.

But in this particular case, is the safest option really to bring them in? I am not talking about how annoying it is to get both girls out of the car, I will do it, if it will keep them safe. But what's more likely - someone to run by, break a window of my car, hot wire it and drive away in under 2 minutes in the middle of the day. Or my toddler to see a balloon 10 miles away floating away, or a random dog across the street or whatever it is that might catch a 2 year olds attention, then her dart into the parking lot and get hit by a car.

FWIW - I went with option 1. And the cashier took pity on me and walked the pizza out to my car for me so I could hold my toddlers hand.

Delivery

bensmommy518 · April 2014

valigrl21 said:

Ok so I never ever would if the car was out of my sight. But honestly, I thought about it once. I didn't actually do it, but am still not sure what was the better option. So all of you that said never ever, I want your opinions:

I had my newborn and 2 1/2 year old with me. We went to pick up pizza. I had already ordered it and paid for it online. I parked right by the front door and the pick up is 5 feet from the door. So all together, I was going to be 15 feet (approximately) from the car. No one was in line, so it was going to take me 1-2 minutes to walk in say my order, they grab my pizza and back to the car. Still daylight out.

So I could get both of the car. Get pizza. Now walk back to car with infant seat in one hand, pizza in the other. No free hand for toddler - I am left walking towards a parking lot, just reminding her to stay close, not to run away. Obviously, if I had to, I would have dropped the pizza to chase and grab her.

But in this particular case, is the safest option really to bring them in? I am not talking about how annoying it is to get both girls out of the car, I will do it, if it will keep them safe. But what's more likely - someone to run by, break a window of my car, hot wire it and drive away in under 2 minutes in the middle of the day. Or my toddler to see a balloon 10 miles away floating away, or a random dog across the street or whatever it is that might catch a 2 year olds attention, then her dart into the parking lot and get hit by a car.

FWIW - I went with option 1. And the cashier took pity on me and walked the pizza out to my car for me so I could hold my toddlers hand.

This was kinda my husbands argument. In my case the post office was not crowded and the whole front is floor to ceiling windows so I would have been able to see the car the whole time. The package I was dropping off had a prepaid label on it so I did not have to pay any shipping costs. He was annoyed that I did not just run it in and back out - would have taken under a minute. I can logically understand his point of view but in the moment it just felt wrong becasue of all the "what ifs". His response was that I was being a little paranoid and despite all our best efforts there is never going to be a way to prevent everything that "could" happen. My response was simply "but I can prevent this."

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