How was the shower? Part 2

b48kate · April 2014

Share the joy and the drama of the shower here!

Bonus points given for crazy MILs, AW relatives, inappropriate comments by well-meaning friends and/or photos of all kinds.

Abenedict2011 · April 2014

My coworkers threw me a shower at work on Wed. It was very nice of them to do. It was fun to relax and have pizza and cake on a weekday afternoon. My two closest coworkers threw the party and got baby one of those books that they recorded their voices on it. Very special day. My family shower isn't until Memorial Day weekend (I'll be 36 weeks.)

MrsCase1 · April 2014

My shower is next weekend. So far my mom has already called and asked me how to make my famous punch three times (apparently she doesn't write it down) and just yesterday called to tell me how lame it is that an evite was sent in lieu of a standard invite.

1. When someone is doing something nice for you, there is no room to criticize.

2. This is my second baby so I am blessed to even get a shower.

3. There are 80 people on the guest list so an evite was frugal and practical (just like me!)

4. By saying "I don't do email" you make yourself sound ridiculous and old. Get with the program.

I can't wait for her criticisms of the actual shower. And I have to bring Lincoln so I am sure it won't be very restful, LOL. Maybe her and Lincoln will distract each other.

MrsRahl · April 2014

MrsCase1 said:
My shower is next weekend. So far my mom has already called and asked me how to make my famous punch three times (apparently she doesn't write it down) and just yesterday called to tell me how lame it is that an evite was sent in lieu of a standard invite.

1. When someone is doing something nice for you, there is no room to criticize.

2. This is my second baby so I am blessed to even get a shower.

3. There are 80 people on the guest list so an evite was frugal and practical (just like me!)

4. By saying "I don't do email" you make yourself sound ridiculous and old. Get with the program.

I can't wait for her criticisms of the actual shower. And I have to bring Lincoln so I am sure it won't be very restful, LOL. Maybe her and Lincoln will distract each other.

I had the exact time opposite problem where my MIL wanted to send out evites and I didnt. I don't know more than 3 people that email friends. The rest just do Facebook and I wasn't inviting people via facebook. She was kind of pissy but in the end just dealt with it. I personally wanted to send out nice invitations but I also enjoy a nice handwritten letter over an email any day. I am old fashioned in that way

My shower is tomorrow and my mom and aunt are driving me INSANE and are getting pissed that I'm not coming early to help them set up and I'm sure they'll put me on clean up duty afterward as this is what happened for my bridal shower. People also keep calling me last minute to rsvp or bail and I'm getting super annoyed. Don't call me, call the number on the invite!! You think I'm throwing my own shower? Although it feels like it when my mil made me do the favors, address and send all the invites(which that part OK I'll deal because I chose paper invites), buy the decorations and bake cookies. Now I'm getting crap because I won't set up? Urgh.

MrsCase1 · April 2014

@MrsRahl I also prefer a paper invite but considering I am not the hostess I didn't feel it was my place to say anything. This shower is being thrown by my church and the guest list is huge so I was simply thankful for ANYTHING. It was just another example of my mom pissing in my cheerios.

MrsRahl · April 2014

@MrsCase1‌ I can understand that. I paid for the invites and sent them, but my issue really was I couldn't even tell you more than a handful of emails. Also a lot of people on my guest list are over 50 and don't even own computers lol. If I had to send out 80 invites I'd try to email them too. I only had 30 or so to send so it wasn't a huge deal. I'd suggest sending handwritten thank yous though. That's just my humble opinion though.

lellymine · April 2014

The one on my side went really well. Nothing to complain about and oy one thing could even slightly be annoying. My mom's aunt came and she's in her late 80's and onery as hell. My mom was telling her about my nursery theme, woodland, and her aunt yelled out (she can't hear very well anymore) "Why on earth would she go with that? Woodland? What the hell is woodland? Eck, woodland" haha thankfully it made me laugh and I'm not upset but only because she's this incredibly grouchy old woman

JulieSmiles · April 2014

I had a shower today. MY friend sent the invites out 8 weeks ago. I'm pretty sure that people forgot about it. MY friend wouldn't tell me who hadn't RSVP'ed so I had very people show up. I am disappointed because some of the people I really wanted to see. It was nice with the people who came though so I can't complain.

MrsCase1 · April 2014

@MrsRahl hand written thank-yous are a given with me. Anything else would be unacceptable. My mom is only in her mid-fifties and is an executive. It is totally unreasonable that she says she "doesn't do" email. She also "doesn't do" cell phones because she doesn't like "being tied to people and having people be able to get a hold of her whenever they want." She prefers an "air of mystery." I consider it all an illness.

dragonfly711 · April 2014

MrsCase1 said:
My shower is next weekend. So far my mom has already called and asked me how to make my famous punch three times (apparently she doesn't write it down) and just yesterday called to tell me how lame it is that an evite was sent in lieu of a standard invite.

1. When someone is doing something nice for you, there is no room to criticize.

2. This is my second baby so I am blessed to even get a shower.

3. There are 80 people on the guest list so an evite was frugal and practical (just like me!)

4. By saying "I don't do email" you make yourself sound ridiculous and old. Get with the program.

I can't wait for her criticisms of the actual shower. And I have to bring Lincoln so I am sure it won't be very restful, LOL. Maybe her and Lincoln will distract each other.

@MrsCase1
Oh wow. My shower is next weekend. I know time and place but nothing else. My best friend is doing it and my mom made the invitations. I gave her a list of about 60 people.
She emails me and says don't get mad at me but 60 people. Do you really need that many people? Why do you have to invite old co workers? Um I worked w them for over 10 yrs. I lived above where I worked for 7 years. Then come to find put they were going to do a shower for me.
I just turned 40 didn't have a party didn't really have one for 30. Just family my dad passed a few weeks before. The one thing I am super excited for and my mom has to ask why. It should be fun though.

Evites are awesome. That was a great way to go.

bumpuser9343355 · April 2014

I had my first one today (second one next weekend). Everything was awesome. My MIL and SIL did most of it and it was super nice and everything looked beautiful. They did a bee theme, which was very cute. It was mostly people from work (my MIL and I teach at the same school) so not a lot of my really close friends were there, but lovely nonetheless and everyone was very generous. Got a TON of clothes and some good practical stuff too. Overall it was a great party!

babygabe614 · April 2014

Aw I missed this post and just posted in the old one! Doh!

b48kate · April 2014

@babygabe614 's shower story moved from old thread. It has pictures so bonus points are awarded as promised.

babygabe614
member
6:24PM
Just had our first baby shower today. It was hosted by my husband's aunt/godmother so the guests were all his aunts, cousins and grandmother from his mom's side. It was so nice and relaxed! No games (thank god) and more like a family party than a typical shower. It was great!

His aunt gave me the sweetest gift ever... one of my husband's baby blankets from when he was first brought home from the hospital. His mother is deceased and there are not very many things left from his childhood, so it meant so much to us that she had kept it all these years and gave it to us. All in all, a great day!

Here's a pic from my instagram (name omitted):

diagonalley · April 2014

Had my shower today. It was lovely. The theme was Downton Abbey tea party. My mom went way out planning every little detail but I loved it all! Always a little awkward opening presents in front of so many people but we got so many things we needed! Just a few things left that we will need to pick up!

MrsRahl · April 2014

MommyP710 said:

Had my shower today. It was lovely. The theme was Downton Abbey tea party. My mom went way out planning every little detail but I loved it all! Always a little awkward opening presents in front of so many people but we got so many things we needed! Just a few things left that we will need to pick up!

AHHHH I LOVE DOWNTON ABBEY!!!!!!!!!! I'm having a tea party shower too as my mom is a tea party caterer. Man, now I wish I would have thought of that!!!!

elsa1688 · April 2014

My little sister just told me that my older sister is planning on having a champagne toast to my mom at my shower tomorrow. I really miss my mom too but it's been 5 years. It doesn't need to always be a memorial to my mom. I just want the day to be happy and positive. A celebration, not a sad thing.

diagonalley · April 2014

MrsRahl said:

MommyP710 said:

Had my shower today. It was lovely. The theme was Downton Abbey tea party. My mom went way out planning every little detail but I loved it all! Always a little awkward opening presents in front of so many people but we got so many things we needed! Just a few things left that we will need to pick up!

AHHHH I LOVE DOWNTON ABBEY!!!!!!!!!! I'm having a tea party shower too as my mom is a tea party caterer. Man, now I wish I would have thought of that!!!!

It was perfect. My MIL collects teacups so those were out for people to use with a variety of tea available. My dad made scones, my in laws made small sandwiches, my mom set up a fascinator creating station, and our invitation listed my husband and I as Lord and lady of the town we live in and invited guests to wear their pearls and hats. Many of the guests did which totally added to the atmosphere. It was so much fun

babygabe614 · April 2014

Thanks, @internationalkate!!

daninewf · April 2014

I had two really amazing showers, one with my close friends and one with my work colleagues. I am so grateful for all the generosity and thoughtful gifts we were given. Our LO is already spoiled .

Kinipela7 · April 2014

@babygabe614 - cute dress! where is it from?

jenlynne0624 · April 2014

mine is on saturday! i can't wait. my mom and mother in law are putting it on for me, though they wanted my input on many of the details. i have a feeling they have some surprises in store for me, so we will see. mom has kept me updated on the guest list, and i cannot wait to see my best girls from college as we all live pretty far from each other now. i will update next week!!

MrsCase1 · April 2014

@babygabe614 wow you look like a model! Frame those photos of yourself!!

MrsCase1 · April 2014

@elsa1688 I think your sister should confer with you on that prior to just having it. I think after half a decade you're entitled to not want it to be about that.

elsa1688 · April 2014

@MrsCase1‌ I was really upset last night and am still upset but I don't think there's much I can say without her taking it wrong. The whole thing has been a PIRA. She also asked my DF to help pay for it. I'm so grateful she is throwing one but also ready for it to be done.

katekat8721 · April 2014

elsa1688 said:

My little sister just told me that my older sister is planning on having a champagne toast to my mom at my shower tomorrow. I really miss my mom too but it's been 5 years. It doesn't need to always be a memorial to my mom. I just want the day to be happy and positive. A celebration, not a sad thing.

Totally understandable. Hugs.

MrsCase1 · April 2014

@elsa1688 not to mention, if anyone wanted to mention your mom, one would think it would be you during your thank you speech, "Wish mom was here" etc. I think the way you originally posed it to us is the perfect way to say it. If she takes it wrong that is on her.

Taymiller · April 2014

My SIL threw us our shower yesterday. She had it at her new house that she was supposed to close on in March but didn't end up getting the keys until April 25 (yes one day before the shower), they remodeled their kitchen in 24 hours and had the shower was awesome! I can't believe how much they did in a 24 hour period. My fav gift was the quilt that DH's aunt made for us, she sewed all our bedding because that is what his mom would have done if she were here with us, made me cry for sure.

Most of our friends have just had babies so it was a baby filled house and it was awesome. I haven't held an infant ever so I got some practice (failed a bit) but DH came to my rescue and he was super cute will all the little ones. I feel very loved and super excited for this baby

rainbowdashh · April 2014

You look great @Merie412‌!

JulieSmiles · April 2014

@Merie412‌ You look adorable and so happy!

b48kate · April 2014

@Merie412‌ Love the sari!! Have always wanted an excuse to wear one. You looked gorgeous!

b48kate · April 2014

shannonliggett said:
Had my first shower yesterday! My mom made it hedgehog themed (we have a hedgehog and they are the cutest). I attached a picture of the cupcakes she ordered. We decorated onesies which was really fun. I am so grateful for the friends and family who came, and they gave me so much more than I expected!

I demand to see your hedgehog next Furbaby Friday!

MorganW24 · April 2014

We had our shower today hosted by the grandmas to be and it was so amazing! Great food, great ladies, and a lot of love headed for this little one!

cristykaye · April 2014

Had our shower yesterday! It was amazing! So many great people showed up! It was a tab ovewhelming at times but all in all it was great!!

babygabe614 · April 2014

@Kinipela7 Thanks! The dress is from Pink Blush Maternity.

@MrsCase1 Wow, you are so sweet! That made my day... thank you!

elsa1688 · April 2014

@KrystaJ‌ yikes! So sorry. At least it's over?

babygabe614 · April 2014

@KrystaJ what a mess! Your MIL sounds awful, I'm sorry. Thank goodness your parents were there so you weren't "stuck" with her. I'm glad you can relax now that it's over, though!

temursgirl · April 2014

@shannonliggett‌ yes, pics of the hedgehog! They are so cute!

@elsa1688‌ I think that's really intrusive of your sister. My mom passed away several years ago as well, and while I naturally think of her a lot these days because of becoming a mother myself, I would not appreciate some relative using my shower as a memorial. And I agree with PP who said if anyone makes that toast it should be you.

@Internationalkate‌ I wear a sari pretty often and I would be happy to nominate you as my proxy sari-wearer on such occasions.

temursgirl · April 2014

@KrystaJ I can understand why most of the guests arrived drunk. They probably feel they have to be drunk to meet your MIL. Is she at all well meaning with just very bad manners or does she actively try to provoke people?

temursgirl · April 2014

KrystaJ said:

Temurlang1 said:

@KrystaJ I can understand why most of the guests arrived drunk. They probably feel they have to be drunk to meet your MIL. Is she at all well meaning with just very bad manners or does she actively try to provoke people?

Honestly, it's a little of both. It doesn't help that she has a therapist who also sounds like a whack job (he's told her she doesn't ever have to apologize for anything - that sounds healthy, right?) and she's surrounded herself with doctors who will give her whatever medications she wants or has read about.

Interesting... a bit like my mom actually, although my mom wasn't generally rude in that way, but she needed the attention to be on her, even if it was negative attention. I always took "the therapist said..." stories with a grain of salt because either my mom was making it up or her therapist should/would have had her license revoked. And my mom would not only convince doctors to give her meds, but she once threw a tantrum to get a colonoscopy she didn't need. Because, ya know, colonoscopies are so much fun.

temursgirl · April 2014

KrystaJ said:

Temurlang1 said:

KrystaJ said:

Temurlang1 said:

@KrystaJ I can understand why most of the guests arrived drunk. They probably feel they have to be drunk to meet your MIL. Is she at all well meaning with just very bad manners or does she actively try to provoke people?

Honestly, it's a little of both. It doesn't help that she has a therapist who also sounds like a whack job (he's told her she doesn't ever have to apologize for anything - that sounds healthy, right?) and she's surrounded herself with doctors who will give her whatever medications she wants or has read about.

Interesting... a bit like my mom actually, although my mom wasn't generally rude in that way, but she needed the attention to be on her, even if it was negative attention. I always took "the therapist said..." stories with a grain of salt because either my mom was making it up or her therapist should/would have had her license revoked. And my mom would not only convince doctors to give her meds, but she once threw a tantrum to get a colonoscopy she didn't need. Because, ya know, colonoscopies are so much fun.

Wow - it sounds like they could almost be twins. Not easy people to deal with.

Yeah, and isn't your MIL also Swedish (my mom was)? My mom passed away (somewhat surprisingly NOT due to mixing prescription drugs or anything like that), but when she was alive I spent a lot of time and effort developing strategies to deal with her. She didn't start out that way, so it always made me sad that she couldn't be the person she was when I was younger, but I did end up often just avoiding any unnecessary contact. I also just didn't include her in things or share with her to avoid drama. But holidays and family functions would always require a complex management strategy.

SecondTimeinMSU · April 2014

I didn't have a shower this time around but I'll share my shower drama from last time. My aunt decided to secretly drink from a flask the whole time so by the present opening she was sloshed. My SIL gave me a book, the same one my MIL had given her with the same inscription (MIL had passed away while I was pregnant). It wouldn't been a totally touching moment but then my drunk aunt grabbed the book and proceeded reading it loudly. I couldn't get her to stop and I didn't want to grab at it and risk tearing a page. Ugh. I was so embarrassed. Finally one of my other aunts dragged her off. I know I should be more understanding but I am still a little upset she never apologized.

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