My niece is having major hip surgery a couple days after mother's day. Six week recovery with one in the hospital. My sister has a ton going on the weekend before; younger niece's dance recital on Sat, post dance get together at her house, her niece's 1st communion (moved to that weekend to accommodate surgery date), mothers day events planned for a long time, other little things that need to be done for surgery (pre op, packing, etc.). Our dad and SM originally planned to come help out during surgery week (they live in AZ). Our mom also wants to be there (lives in WI). Sister is in MI.
Dad and SM changed plans in late March. They are now bringing SM's mom, brother and his wife arriving Sat. They also invited SM's Ohio family to come to MI and visit (we've never met them). Dad and SM told my sister that they would not attend the recital, but spend time with Ohio family instead. Also, instead of staying for a week after surgery, they are leaving the day after the surgery to meet her bio brothers in another state earlier than planned. Ok.
Last week they decided to attend the recital. My sister was able to get tickets. They also want sister and family to go out to dinner after the recital. Sister says no, they already have dinner planned with about 10 guests. SM asks if she can just take the girls out to dinner then. Sister says no, but they are welcome to join everyone at her house, plenty of room. No dice, our mom will be there and dad doesn't want to be near her. They then ask if she can pull the girls from school on Monday to hang out. The Ohio family are leaving Sunday. They also expressed their displeasure that she is spending mothers day with our mom and her husband's family. They knew this at the beginning of March.
TODAY, dad calls my sister at work and tells her that he feels like he is playing "second fiddle", she needs to come up with a better plan and call him back. She offered to spend Saturday before the recital with them, but he said that wouldn't work. Saturday night won't work because he doesn't want to be in the same place as my mom (divorced for 30 years btw). Sunday is jammed packed and they knew this in early March.
My sister is a people pleaser and it is tearing her up. She doesn't know what to do. I am NOT a people pleaser, so my advice is to tell them to stick it where the sun doesn't shine. But, I'm biased.
If you read that novel, thank you! What are your thoughts? I'm happy to add more info, just didn't want to make this crazy long. I wish I lived close to her to help with this cluster. I'm in TX.