Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
MommyWannaB10
member
Re: How to deal with the comments (once babies are born)
Our beautiful babies
Just roll with it IMO, people just want to be friendly and take part in the excitement that is multiples!
This! I'm not a people person myself and like to keep to myself when I'm out, not talk to every single person I encounter. I want to go in, do my thing and leave without having to talk to anyone, answer questions, etc. DS got a ton of comments about how blue his eyes are, but I didn't have to stand there and have a 20 min. conversation about him.
TTC #1 since December 2009
IVF #1 - 6/2 Start Stims 6/14 ER 6/19 ET (2 embies transferred) BFP 6/27/11! Beta #1 87 Beta #2 197!! 1st U/S 7/19 (5 embies in storage!)
7/19/11 -- One Beautiful Heart Beat!!
It's a BOY!!
Jack Austin born at 37w; 2/10/2012
Working on Baby #2; FET scheduled for 1/8/2013!!! Cancelled due to nasty flu sickness
FET 1.0 re-scheduled for 2/26/13! -- BFN
FET #2 scheduled for May 2013 -- BFN
Onto IVF #2....scheduled for June 2013, cancelled due to high estrogen levels
IVF 2.1 re-scheduled for Sept. 2013 ER 9/26. ET 10/1 (2 transferred, 1 in storage). BFP 10/10 beta #1 105, beta #2 255
Ultrasound 11/1 -- TWINS!!
Both Girls!! <br>
Harper Grace & Hailey Ryann born at 33w6d; 5/8/2014!
Yep, get that too! Good thing is most ask if they run in my family, I can reply that my grandma had trips, so nobody knows if we had fertility problems or not. It's not their business anyway!
TTC #1 since December 2009
IVF #1 - 6/2 Start Stims 6/14 ER 6/19 ET (2 embies transferred) BFP 6/27/11! Beta #1 87 Beta #2 197!! 1st U/S 7/19 (5 embies in storage!)
7/19/11 -- One Beautiful Heart Beat!!
It's a BOY!!
Jack Austin born at 37w; 2/10/2012
Working on Baby #2; FET scheduled for 1/8/2013!!! Cancelled due to nasty flu sickness
FET 1.0 re-scheduled for 2/26/13! -- BFN
FET #2 scheduled for May 2013 -- BFN
Onto IVF #2....scheduled for June 2013, cancelled due to high estrogen levels
IVF 2.1 re-scheduled for Sept. 2013 ER 9/26. ET 10/1 (2 transferred, 1 in storage). BFP 10/10 beta #1 105, beta #2 255
Ultrasound 11/1 -- TWINS!!
Both Girls!! <br>
Harper Grace & Hailey Ryann born at 33w6d; 5/8/2014!
Everything @AshB62 said...our average is 9 random conversations with strangers. Per store. It was fun for this extrovert for the first week, but that's about it.
Trust me you will be less than thrille when this becomes an everyday event. Point blank it's incredibly annoying and most the time I avoid eye contact or just give a smile and keep walking.
Mostly I get stares, and "oh how cute, twins!" as I go by. I don't really like small talk either and I'm usually on a mission to get things done before someone needs to eat, go to the bathroom, or take a nap (I have a 3yo toddler too).
My strategy is to avoid eye contact with pretty much anyone except my kids. And when someone stops me, just finish doing whatever I was doing and move on. I don't really allow a conversation to happen most of the time. I just answer their question, or say thanks, and keep moving. I don't voluneteer any info ever, and that tends to keep things shorter. Every once in a while, I do end up in a longer conversation with someone, but it's maybe once a trip or every couple trips anymore. I just deal with it. As long as no one is totally melting down, it's not going to kill me to answer a couple questions. People are just curious, and babies are people magnets as it is, make it two (or more)babies, and you just get more attention.
TTC since May 2006. After 3 failed Clomid cycles, 2 failed Injectibles/IUIs, 2 failed IVFs and 1 failed FET, we moved on to adoption!
Last ditch FET resulted in BFP, and identical twin girls!
Our beautiful babies
Our beautiful babies
Abigail Taylor 09.18.2008
TTC #1 since December 2009
IVF #1 - 6/2 Start Stims 6/14 ER 6/19 ET (2 embies transferred) BFP 6/27/11! Beta #1 87 Beta #2 197!! 1st U/S 7/19 (5 embies in storage!)
7/19/11 -- One Beautiful Heart Beat!!
It's a BOY!!
Jack Austin born at 37w; 2/10/2012
Working on Baby #2; FET scheduled for 1/8/2013!!! Cancelled due to nasty flu sickness
FET 1.0 re-scheduled for 2/26/13! -- BFN
FET #2 scheduled for May 2013 -- BFN
Onto IVF #2....scheduled for June 2013, cancelled due to high estrogen levels
IVF 2.1 re-scheduled for Sept. 2013 ER 9/26. ET 10/1 (2 transferred, 1 in storage). BFP 10/10 beta #1 105, beta #2 255
Ultrasound 11/1 -- TWINS!!
Both Girls!! <br>
Harper Grace & Hailey Ryann born at 33w6d; 5/8/2014!
Now, someone who says something straight up rude and meant to be condescending, can get an weird look from me and no response. I can generally tell where people are coming from and if the comment is innocent and harmless, I will try and let it roll off my back.
ETA" Words don't spell themselves...
#1 BFP 1/10/11; missed m/c discovered 7w5d
IF Dx: Endo, hetero MTHFR mutation, poor morphology
#1 IUI: 1/18/12 = BFN
#1 IVF/ICSI 4/2/12 = 2 x 7-cell and 1 x 5-cell transferred (3dt) = BFP!!
H was born at 41w2d on 12/29/12 - be still my heart!
#2 IVF/ICSI 1/19/14 = 2 x 8 cells transferred (3dt) = BFP!! EDD 10/09/14
M&W born at 37 weeks on 9/18/14 - I am the momma of 3 boys!!!
I also had someone say "I'm sorry" when they heard me say I had twins. I actually told this person that I wasn't sorry for myself so they didn't need to feel bad for me. I had had enough of those comments that. Usually I don't say anything.
Whoops- I screwed that up.
Then my BIL was asking if the twins were "closer" then my singletons. I was like, idk, they're 9 mos. What, do you think they talk to dolphins or something?
My trick for getting through target without twin talk is make it look like there's only one baby. I leave one in the infant seat, with a cover if sleeping, and wear the other. I put the seat inside the basket with the sunshade up. If people want to look at her they have to lean into my basket almost. So, usually they think the car seat is empty and I'm just baby wearing the baby.
That's a great idea, never would have thought of it. What type of baby carrier do you have? I have an ergo from when DS was a baby.
TTC #1 since December 2009
IVF #1 - 6/2 Start Stims 6/14 ER 6/19 ET (2 embies transferred) BFP 6/27/11! Beta #1 87 Beta #2 197!! 1st U/S 7/19 (5 embies in storage!)
7/19/11 -- One Beautiful Heart Beat!!
It's a BOY!!
Jack Austin born at 37w; 2/10/2012
Working on Baby #2; FET scheduled for 1/8/2013!!! Cancelled due to nasty flu sickness
FET 1.0 re-scheduled for 2/26/13! -- BFN
FET #2 scheduled for May 2013 -- BFN
Onto IVF #2....scheduled for June 2013, cancelled due to high estrogen levels
IVF 2.1 re-scheduled for Sept. 2013 ER 9/26. ET 10/1 (2 transferred, 1 in storage). BFP 10/10 beta #1 105, beta #2 255
Ultrasound 11/1 -- TWINS!!
Both Girls!! <br>
Harper Grace & Hailey Ryann born at 33w6d; 5/8/2014!
I use an ergo now but loved the K'tan for when tiny.