is it better to tear or to be cut.. everyone's favorite topic

Re: is it better to tear or to be cut.. everyone's favorite topic

• SimpleComplexity member

  April 2014

  I'm officially terrified. 

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• Huahine member

  April 2014

  iris427 said:

  littlemissmarla said:

  i feel comforted and terrified by all your responses hahaha but i will be bringing all this up to my doc at our next appointment.

  
  

  
  

  i think we should start telling teenage girls about ripping from your vag to your a-hole and we might have found the best form of birth control

  Oh yeah, I totally plan on showing my daughter pictures of 4th degree tears when she is a teenager.  And maybe some pics of herpes and warts too, just for good measure.

  Since I'm older than dirt, the internet didn't exist when I was in high school.  So my mom used to show me pictures of STDs from her nursing journals.  It didn't make me keep my legs together, but I sure as hell made certain my partners used condoms. 

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• iris427 member

  April 2014

  Huahine said:

  iris427 said:

  littlemissmarla said:

  i feel comforted and terrified by all your responses hahaha but i will be bringing all this up to my doc at our next appointment.

  
  

  
  

  i think we should start telling teenage girls about ripping from your vag to your a-hole and we might have found the best form of birth control

  Oh yeah, I totally plan on showing my daughter pictures of 4th degree tears when she is a teenager.  And maybe some pics of herpes and warts too, just for good measure.

  Since I'm older than dirt, the internet didn't exist when I was in high school.  So my mom used to show me pictures of STDs from her nursing journals.  It didn't make me keep my legs together, but I sure as hell made certain my partners used condoms. 

  That's kind of my goal.  I don't expect my kids to stay virgins until marriage, I just want them to protect themselves.

  
  

  
  

  Big sister {September 2008} Sweet boy {April 2011} Fuzzy Bundle {ETA July 2014}
  

  
  

  
  

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• redhotmama7 member

  April 2014

  iris427 said:

  
  

  TheAnne said:

  
  

  
  

  iris427 said:

  
  

  
  

  helloblueeyes said:

  
  

  
  

  livelaughlove88 said:

  
  

  I'm a FTM but we talked about this in my Bradley Method class.  A cut would be more necessary if the tear was going forward instead of backward because then it can cause painful urination for you and take longer to heal.  My instructor said she had some slight tearing in one of her 4 births but it healed up just fine.  Also I had a friend tell me to use evening primrose oil to help prevent tears.

  
  

  Um...I was unaware this was even possible. 

  
  :-O

  
  

  
  

  This kid is never coming out. 

  
  

  I know someone who had one of her labia torn off during her first delivery.  They had to sew it back on.  It tore again when she had her second child.

  
  

  You're welcome for that.

  
  

  out.
  
  
  
  Apparently her kid's nose got caught on her labia coming out and tore it
  right off.  They had to pick it up off the bed and stitch it back on hervag.  She says things look pretty wonky down there now LOL
  
  Sorry mobile quote weirdness going on... This just seems highly unlikely to me... Almost like an April Fools day joke and I'm not sure I could ever believe it without proof.,. I mean a nose ripping her labia completely off to where it fell on the table... I call BS... (not visual proof but you know from her dr or something)

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• knitsandgiggles member

  April 2014 edited April 2014

  I was so terrified of tearing first time around. My nurse was great and did the perineal massage a ton. But it was all for naught with Miss E coming out with her left arm wrapped by her face with her cord around her neck. I found getting the flippin stitches hurt quite a bit. This time around, come what may.

  Formerly knittylady
  DH:34 - Me: 33
  Emmaline Winifred - 1.25.2013
  Wesley Daniel - 7.24.2014
  #3 EDD - 6.24.2018
  
  
  

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• shanaynerz member

  April 2014 edited April 2014

  Haven't read through all PPs yet, but from what I know an episiotomy is preferable over tearing. Some tearing is totally normal and I think happens relatively often (my SIL had a fourth degree tear). I had an episiotomy with DD and it was the worst thing ever, but it happened, I survived, and DD came out very easily. Thankfully she was itty bitty.

  
  

  DD was presenting face first and in distress so it was either that or an emergency C-section. Took an hour to get stitched back up and that hurt like a mofo. Giving birth hurts and there's no sugar coating it. In the moment you do what needs to be done and deal with it after though. Hope I didn't scare anyone further too much...

  
  

  ETA: Everything down there works totally fine btw. Had some scar tissue left over, which made sex hurt, but that corrected itself on its own thankfully.

  

  
  

  

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• cuntasaurusrex member

  April 2014

  I'm feeling really good about my mental progression in all of this.  Reading birth stories in first tri made me dizzy/queasy, and now I'm laughing at vaganus!  Yay!
  

  
  

  
  
  

  Alexander - 8/9/14

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• TugboatSheila member

  April 2014

  In the corner, ears covered, rocking back and forth.

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• [Deleted User] member

  April 2014

  The user and all related content has been deleted.

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• drunkenhandstand member

  April 2014

  Since this thread has turned to horrorville, I'll go ahead and share with you that your fellow July bumpie had a vaganus with her first born. Yes, me. I still shiver thinking about it. My OB's exact words at 2.5 hours of pushing. "Sweetie, I can cut you or you're going to explode like a firecracker." I too felt things on my rectum that should only exit a vajay. 

  
  

  Bright side: I'm hear to tell you that your vajay is probably the quickest healing organ on your body. I was AMAZED how quickly I healed. I was completely cleared at my 6 week check-up. And trust me, I'm a curious one. I looked in the mirror down there almost every day. You couldn't even see the scar a few months later. I've since had another child who did no damage at all. My vajay is still in tact. DH has no complaints. 

  

  
  

   
  

  
  

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• TallMomma29 member

  April 2014

  My lady parts are clenching up so tight reading this thread that I don't think the baby will ever make it out of there! On the bright side: involuntary kegels.

      

  
  
  

  
  

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• AMcLaws member

  April 2014

  I keep laughing out of sheer discomfort.

  

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• iris427 member

  April 2014 edited April 2014

  TheAnne said:

  iris427 said:

  helloblueeyes said:

  livelaughlove88 said:

  I'm a FTM but we talked about this in my Bradley Method class.  A cut would be more necessary if the tear was going forward instead of backward because then it can cause painful urination for you and take longer to heal.  My instructor said she had some slight tearing in one of her 4 births but it healed up just fine.  Also I had a friend tell me to use evening primrose oil to help prevent tears.

  Um...I was unaware this was even possible. 

  
  :-O

  
  

  
  

  This kid is never coming out. 

  I know someone who had one of her labia torn off during her first delivery.  They had to sew it back on.  It tore again when she had her second child.

  
  

  You're welcome for that.

  out.
  

  Apparently her kid's nose got caught on her labia coming out and tore it right off.  They had to pick it up off the bed and stitch it back on hervag.  She says things look pretty wonky down there now LOL

  Sorry mobile quote weirdness going on... This just seems highly unlikely to me... Almost like an April Fools day joke and I'm not sure I could ever believe it without proof.,. I mean a nose ripping her labia completely off to where it fell on the table... I call BS... (not visual proof but you know from her dr or something)

  
  

  I'll have her send you a high res pic of her lady bits so you can inspect it for yourself.

  
  

  
  

  Big sister {September 2008} Sweet boy {April 2011} Fuzzy Bundle {ETA July 2014}
  

  
  

  
  

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• Kohler2009 member

  April 2014

  Good lord your stories are terrifying!!!!! So after 3 hrs of pushing and figuring out DS was facing out towards my hip, the dr said he was going to do an episiomoty. At this point I didn't care, I just wanted him out. Well, I ended up with a 4th degree tear, which I had no clue about until up in post-partum when my OB came in. I just thought all the stitching was normal, lol. It hurt like hell afterwards and sitting on the bed was painful. I made DS go out and get one if those blow up rings for me to sit on and that didn't help. Can't remember when I started feeling normal again. All I know is I never want to go through that again and am terrified to see what happens with these babies!!!

  }

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• [Deleted User] member

  April 2014

  The user and all related content has been deleted.

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• AMcLaws member

  April 2014

  The fat Amy gif? I die. Literally in tears laughing

  

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• lindslalala member

  April 2014

  I had a minor tear with DS and just needed a few stitches, NBD. Since we're sharing horror stories though....my niece was 10lbs6oz and my SIL tore from "hole to hole" so to speak. Her OB told her he recommended cosmetic surgery when she was done having kids to make everything look right again. She had an elective c-section for her 2nd baby mainly to avoid the vaganus situation.

  

  DS born 3.12 

  DD born 7.14

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• acciovino member

  April 2014

  ::slowly backs out of thread::

  Thanking God for my c-sections. I would never want to have sex again.

   

  
  

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• Soon2BMrsN member

  April 2014

  You know, I'd been kinda dreading having a third c/s but now I'm almost looking forward to it. These stories are terrifying!

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• alyss0nl member

  April 2014

  I hurt thinking about this. I had a second degree tear with DS. He came so quickly, the OB tried to massage it, but there wasn't enough time. It was definitely uncomfortable and painful during recovery but it healed fine. Don't think I could do an episiotomy.

  Married 02.06.10

  DS1 born 11.19.11

  DS2 born 07.02.14
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  

  
  

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• Eposty member

  April 2014

  I immediately regret the decision to read this thread!! Terrified lol

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• blacktie3 member

  April 2014

  Can't wait, this sounds amazing!       :-SS

  <<a href="http://lilypie.com/">>

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• jcartz member

  April 2014

  Even as a STM I'm clenching and cringing reading through this. I was so lucky not to tear with DD1. Fx I am as lucky w #2... Ugh

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• littlemissmarla member

  April 2014

  catarntina said:

  I tore up and down, 3rd degree tear. It felt like the OB was lacing up ice skates when she was stitching me. The tear up hurt worse than the tear down. I couldn't pee without the peri bottle for at least 5 weeks. Not sure what the OB who delivered did wrong, but it hurt for 7 or 8 weeks. It didn't heal properly and my OB had to fix it at my 6 week appointment, and I wasn't cleared for sex until I was 8 weeks.

  this might be the scariest analogy ever lol

  
  

  [ Zoey 7.28.14 ]

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• MstoMrstoMom851214 member

  April 2014

  Why on earth did I read this thread?!?!  I am even more terrified than I already was now!!  

  
  

  I tore once from sex (ex-bf was very well-endowed) and that hurt for weeks, and that was just a little minor nick that I obviously didn't get stitches for.  Sex is also uncomfortable for me with my husband a lot of the time, and he's average size.  I always ask for the pediatric clamp when they do my exams at the gyno too.  I'm hoping that I'll suddenly turn very "stretchy" while in labor, but I don't have high hopes!

  
  

  I have been meaning to ask my OB about this and mention my previous tearing, but keep chickening out.  I can't decide if I'm more afraid of a C-section or tearing now....blech!!! 

  
  

  
  

  

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• hope1017 member

  April 2014

  I'm not afraid of the pain from the contractions but I'm totally freaking out since day one about tearing! And here I am reading this!!! This is not helping me at all, I'm still terrified........and I'm still reading...why?!!!!!!

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• bewilderingstar member

  April 2014

  I seriously have read about 10 comments on this and I'm giving up... Can't read anymore. It's just freaking me the EFF out!

  

  
  

  BFP#1: 08/30/12 EDD 04/30/12 m/c 09/04/12 6wks
  BFP#2: 01/27/13 EDD 10/06/13 missed m/c 02/25/13 9wks
  BFP#3: 10/30/13 EDD 07/05/14 Our little dude was born on 07/10/14 @ 2:19p

  
  

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• nicole336 member

  April 2014

  My vagina actually hurts after reading this thread...
  

  Married since June 2008
  
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• Wrights22 member

  April 2014

  Ok. Wow... Personally I feel like the doc should be on top of the situation. If he sees you starting to tear ... Do an episiotomy (one direction only!) and help the baby and mama out. This is exactly what happened to me. I asked my doc about an episiotomy beforehand bc I know I'm little and sensitive down there... And I knew I would tear. He told me he didn't do episiotomies proactively he waited to see how things were going. Well sure enough I started to tear a tiny bit... And he numbed me up and did a nice clean cut.... Enough that was needed. He stitched me up after.... And healed up perfectly fine. I had natural childbirth... And I did not feel the tearing at all. Contractions were where my head was!

  

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• chevronseven member

  April 2014

  iris427 said:

  
  

  helloblueeyes said:

  
  

  
  

  livelaughlove88 said:

  
  

  I'm a FTM but we talked about this in my Bradley Method class.  A cut would be more necessary if the tear was going forward instead of backward because then it can cause painful urination for you and take longer to heal.  My instructor said she had some slight tearing in one of her 4 births but it healed up just fine.  Also I had a friend tell me to use evening primrose oil to help prevent tears.

  
  

  Um...I was unaware this was even possible. 

  
  :-O

  
  

  
  

  This kid is never coming out. 

  
  

  I know someone who had one of her labia torn off during her first delivery.  They had to sew it back on.  It tore again when she had her second child.

  
  

  
  

  You're welcome for that.

  
  
  I literally just screamed when I read that and told DH and he's like "Why are you reading that?!"
  
  

  

            
  

  
  
  

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• zellatrix member

  April 2014

  I'm laughing so hard over here... Mainly nervous laughter. Think I'll stick to my RCS plan now.

   

  

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• Bsmortz member

  April 2014

  I tore towards the front and I don't mean to terrify you, but holy cow. It was bad. My doctor thinks an episiotomy increases the risk of an even bigger tear so they don't do it at all at my hospital. I had an unmedicated birth, and she was 9 lbs 6 oz. I felt the tear. Honestly I'll do unmedicated child birth over and over but give me an epi for the weeks afterwards

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• livkight member

  April 2014

  Why am I reading this thread!!??! X_X

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• mhooks23 member

  April 2014

  I tore with both of my kids to tell the truth I didn't even know, the pain of giving birth without medication masks any feeling I would have felt. I healed fine also. UT every situation is different, I will listen to my MW she knows what's best for me.

  

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• runrinserepeat member

  April 2014

  I didn't tear with DD and I'm just going to pretend that that means I'll get lucky again. Denial is my BFF these days.

  Pass the sheet cake.
  
  

  

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• shamyfowler member

  April 2014

  The idea of tearing to the front sounds absolutely terrifying!  I never even thought about that possibility!  I was with my cousin during her second birth and she tore a little.  I remember seeing the needle they used to sew her up.  It was this long curved thing and I remember thinking "ouchy"!!  Plus, she had an intern stitch her up.  I would have to say a big NO WAY to that!  I had a c/s the first time but am hoping for VBAC this time.  Now I'm thinking I may be crazy! 

   

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• LenaLove member

  April 2014

  I had a second degree tear, I didn't really feel it happen (drug free delivery), and I took advil for a couple days maybe.  Recovery was pretty easy.

  
  

  I tore because at that moment when they tell you to push slowly my doctor told me to push hard, as my DD's heart rate was dropping with contractions.  Turns out she had the cord wrapped twice around her neck, and the contractions were putting pressure on it.  Anyway, they wanted her out quick.  Luckily she was pretty small.

  

  
  

  
  

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• ksuRN09 member

  April 2014

  I think I want to become the perpetually pregnant woman because after reading this, I don't want to give birth. Ever. And I don't even like being pregnant but it's looking better and better comparatively.

                                                              
  

  
  
  

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