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Ugly things

lellyminelellymine member
in June 2014 Moms
If you get really ugly things for your LO from a friend or relative are you going to have the baby wear it to please the relative? Or just send a thank you card and bury it in the back of the closet? Bonus points if you tell us what's the ugliest/worst present you've ever gotten. ;)
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Re: Ugly things

  • Rosebud2587Rosebud2587 member
    If I get clothes and things that aren't my style I'll usually make a point to put baby in it and snap a pic and post it to fb or something (if the giver is on fb) just to say it was worn and then it gets taken off and never worm again. 
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  • Katieluc106Katieluc106 member
    @BrightEyes112‌ yes!
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  • sparklenshine_89sparklenshine_89 member
    I usually have my LO's wear them even if it's just around the house.
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  • LindsayDesignerLindsayDesigner member
    Mina got some ugly stuff at a few of the showers.  The worst stuff went into a box and I left it there for  over a year.  I recently sold them to a consignment shop and bought some cute sandals for her for this summer.
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  • steprozzsteprozz member
    I would try to return it but if that wasn't an option I would try to figure out a way to use it, even if it was just once. when DS was born we got a hideous sweater/knit pants set with no tags or gift receipt or anything on it from one of my moms friends. she definitely didn't make it herself so I have no idea where it came from. it was god awful ugly. luckily it was the most awkward sizing and shape that it never fit him so we never had to make him wear it.
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  • cMichelle0423cMichelle0423 member
    I would just exchange it... there's no sense in keeping something that won't really get used. Plus you don't have to tell them it got exchanged. They won't get to see what baby wears every day so, there's no harm in saying it got worn if you don't feel like hurting their feelings.
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  • PressLovePressLove member
    Rosebud2587 said:
    If I get clothes and things that aren't my style I'll usually make a point to put baby in it and snap a pic just to say it was worn and then it gets taken off and never worm again. 
    This!  If it's something other than clothes, I'd have a nice chat with the giver.

    It hasn't happened to me yet, but I have seen it with my friends.  Recently, an acquaintance  purchased a bag full used clothes for my friend's baby.  Most of the items were hideous and old, but she meant well.  A few pics were emailed and the clothes we boxed up and donated.

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  • Valie18Valie18 member
    So far, all of LOs stuff is adorable. If it was something from family, I would put LO in it when we visit them or when they come for a visit, otherwise I'd try to return it. If it is non-returnable it would become arts&crafts clothes or donated.

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  • SecondTimeinMSUSecondTimeinMSU member
    I didn't receive anything I would define as ugly. I think my standards for what I'd put DS in were pretty low when he'd just spit up on it anyways (he had terrible reflux). I did tend to save my favorite outfits for out and about and the less cute stuff was more for relaxing as home days. I think the only things unworn were those that were impractical because they were either impossible to get on him or impossible to change him in or downright uncomfortable for napping in so maybe I should've tried to return those
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  • Mia081081Mia081081 member
    Depends on who it's from and if it's possible to return. My MIL buys DD some hideous stuff, but I don't return it. She just wears it to her house. If it's from someone else, I'll try to return it, or I'll donate it. 

    DD has way too much clothes - 60% of which comes from my mom, 20% from MIL, so I don't feel bad donating it. 
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  • lellyminelellymine member
    BrightEyes112 said:

    If I were to buy someone a gift and they didn't like it, I would much rather them tell me and try to exchange it so that my very thoughtful gesture and money aren't wasted.

    I agree but what if it's homemade? My aunt just figured out how to make hair bows and sent me a package of 30. They're bad, really bad (Barbie, Hello Kitty and My Little Pony) but since she spent time making them I don't want to hurt her feelings. I don't know when I'd put them on LO though. And she's planning on sending more. :-S
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  • k318k318 member
    Luckily I haven't received anything too bad for the kids. I have returned and exchanged clothes that he got as gifts simply because it was too much. He had so much 0-3 and 3-6 months clothes and barely anything in larger sizes, so I returned some and later on bought larger clothes or got diapers and formula instead if anything was from target.

    We will see what we get for dd. so far we got cute stuff. H thinks it's too much pink but I like it so it stays :) he doesn't go to the store to return stuff anyway.
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  • k2k2togk2k2tog member
    This is why gift receipts are so important... Honestly, I would quietly return it and not say anything. Babies get so many clothes, I can't imagine anyone expecting to see their item being used. But, maybe I'm naive? 

    That said, I have different thoughts about handmade items. Obviously, you can't return them, and often the person who made them put a lot of effort into the item. I've knit and gifted a number of things for the babies in my life - blankets, sweaters, booties and hats - and it would probably upset me if that person came to me and told me they didn't like it. However, when I give a handmade gift, I'm 100% aware that I'm taking a risk - some people don't like knitwear to begin with - so if the item is never used, I'm not offended. I'm not sure if everyone would feel that way, especially those very close to the baby, so maybe PPs are right... put the baby in it once, snap a picture, tuck it away. Just don't tell them you didn't like it... even if they understand the possibility of you not liking it exists, it may still hurt.

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  • lellyminelellymine member
    LilNunz1 said:


    lellymine said:

    BrightEyes112 said:

    If I were to buy someone a gift and they didn't like it, I would much rather them tell me and try to exchange it so that my very thoughtful gesture and money aren't wasted.

    I agree but what if it's homemade? My aunt just figured out how to make hair bows and sent me a package of 30. They're bad, really bad (Barbie, Hello Kitty and My Little Pony) but since she spent time making them I don't want to hurt her feelings. I don't know when I'd put them on LO though. And she's planning on sending more. :-S



    Snap a few pictures and save them for when you're around her. It's not the end of the world for a kid to wear a hair bow that isn't your style. Besides, there's a high chance your kid will tear it off her head anyway. Then say, we appreciate all your hard work, but baby lelly just won't keep anything in her hair.

    Oh that's a perfect thing to say to her!
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  • tbmadeamistaketbmadeamistake member

    I used the ugly, nms clothes that I received as extra outfits for daycare.  Most places have you send in two or three for infants in case they blow out or spit up.  Worked well for me! 

    My mother's best friend got me a really ugly yarn lamp shade for the baby's room...it reeked of smoke (cigarette and pot), so it went right in the trash with the wrapping paper after that shower (for C).  She never comes to my house, and if she ever did, I'd just say that it got too hot and was unsafe to use. 

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  • JNerdJNerd member
    For clothes - I agree with PP- they go through so many so I'm not overly fussy about what LO wears. I do save the favs for out and about, and try to put LO in the outfit she around the person who bought it for them. Honestly- another outfit doesn't kill me either way.

    The other stuff (non clothes) I kept as a FTM, swearing it was useless but have ended up using most of it because it's easier to use the stuff we already have instead of buying new. And that way I don't care if it gets trashed.

    Toys are a different story. When LO is under a year I am pretty picky about toys and will exchange or donate without even hesitating.
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  • babygabe614babygabe614 member
    I was given a bag of baby clothes from a friend recently (most had been given to her from her sister as hand me down from her kids) and I'd say 90% of it is stuff I just would never put LO in. Since she was given most of the stuff to begin with, I felt no qualms about re-donating the stuff I didn't want to someone my mom knows who was in need of baby clothes.

    If someone buys us clothing we just truly hate, I'll probably just exchange it and tell them it didn't fit. If it is homemade, I'd probably snap a pic of LO in it for the gift-giver and tuck it into the back of the closet.

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  • ElTrain5ElTrain5 member
    edited April 2014

    Unless it was something sentimental/home-made, etc., I would absolutely return/exchange it or donate it/trash it.  I just don't room in my house for boxes of crap we never plan on using.  DH's family tends to be not very registry friendly, so I am expecting to have to do this for a lot of things.  I'll probably just make a big "donate" bag and throw it in the salvation army bin. 

    ETA: DH's aunt, whom I love, offered to buy us our stroller.  Well, our beloved hedgehog stroller was discontinued, so we registered for a different one, and shortly thereafter I found one remaining  hedgehog stroller on clearance and swooped it up.  She already bought the other stroller off of the registry.....not sure what to do about that..?  I was planning on just returning it and using the funds to get other stuff we need, but what if she sees the stroller/carseat and knows its not the one we bought?

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  • k2k2togk2k2tog member
    ElTrain5 said:

    Unless it was something sentimental/home-made, etc., I would absolutely return/exchange it or donate it/trash it.  I just don't room in my house for boxes of crap we never plan on using.  DH's family tends to be not very registry friendly, so I am expecting to have to do this for a lot of things.  I'll probably just make a big "donate" bag and throw it in the salvation army bin. 

    ETA: DH's aunt, whom I love, offered to buy us our stroller.  Well, our beloved hedgehog stroller was discontinued, so we registered for a different one, and shortly thereafter I found one remaining  hedgehog stroller on clearance and swooped it up.  She already bought the other stroller off of the registry.....not sure what to do about that..?  I was planning on just returning it and using the funds to get other stuff we need, but what if she sees the stroller/carseat and knows its not the one we bought?

    I would just tell her what happened. I feel like in a situation like that, any normal, reasonable person would not be offended at all. If she still wants to buy you a big ticket item, you could point her towards something else you have on your registery. 

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  • flerlgirlflerlgirl member
    I have honestly never had anyone remember what they got for DS unless it was a very specific outfit (like my dad got him a "I'm Grandpa's Big Guy" shirt and he remembers that). I couldn't pick what I gave people out of a line-up. And even if I could tell what I gave them, I'd rather them get something they want. Everyone has different taste. 





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  • temursgirltemursgirl member
    It depends who the giver is and what the item is.  If an older relative, parents' friend, etc. gives something I don't like, I'd probably make some effort to use it around them or for a photo.  If it's from a friend or someone I don't think would care that much, I might return it.

    That said, we haven't received anything I'd really call ugly so far, just NMS.  If I received a super dressy party dress like that I would probably exchange it, but if it's a play outfit I'd probably use it around the house or as a spare in the diaper bag..

    As for hideous hair bows... ugh.  Due to having curls that adults found adorable, I was subjected to numerous hideous hair accessories throughout childhood.  They rarely stayed in my hair.  I think @LilNunz1's suggestion is a great solution.

    @Mztwilson... wow!  That's remarkably ugly!  I can't look away lol!
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  • flerlgirlflerlgirl member
    sempre_staccato said:
    ElTrain5 said:

    Unless it was something sentimental/home-made, etc., I would absolutely return/exchange it or donate it/trash it.  I just don't room in my house for boxes of crap we never plan on using.  DH's family tends to be not very registry friendly, so I am expecting to have to do this for a lot of things.  I'll probably just make a big "donate" bag and throw it in the salvation army bin. 

    ETA: DH's aunt, whom I love, offered to buy us our stroller.  Well, our beloved hedgehog stroller was discontinued, so we registered for a different one, and shortly thereafter I found one remaining  hedgehog stroller on clearance and swooped it up.  She already bought the other stroller off of the registry.....not sure what to do about that..?  I was planning on just returning it and using the funds to get other stuff we need, but what if she sees the stroller/carseat and knows its not the one we bought?

    I would just tell her what happened. I feel like in a situation like that, any normal, reasonable person would not be offended at all. If she still wants to buy you a big ticket item, you could point her towards something else you have on your registery. 
    This actually happened to me as well. My sister and her SIL got me the stroller the same day I bought one for myself. I just explained it to her and she was able to return it for a full refund. NBD! Hope it works out! 





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  • lellyminelellymine member
    Read247 said:

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    Honestly I'm wondering why you even started this discussion. You've already started a "best gift" discussion, why not combine the two? Not to mention we have a shower thread and a SS/AW thread, but ok. Have you seriously never received a gift that you didn't like or wasn't your style?? I'd say do with baby gifts what you do with those gifts. It's kind of a no brainer...

    I just got the ugly gift today. If I had gotten it when I started the other gift thread, you're right it would've made sense to combine the two. Mostly, I donate gifts I don't like but since this was a homemade one I wanted others opinions.
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  • temursgirltemursgirl member
    @joules235‌ do you have pics? Please, please post! Ugly mermaid overalls are hilarious!
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  • PinkKEL9PinkKEL9 member
    My MIL sent me a huge box of my husbands baby clothes. It also included some dresses that were his younger sisters. This stuff is all from the 90s. OLD and UGLY. I would never put my baby in it. That box got shoved to the back of a closet. 
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  • MrsCase1MrsCase1 member
    I never gift clothes for this very reason. Taste is so personal. I donate lots if stuff because I know there is a family somewhere that could use or appreciate it. And I never feel guilty, lol!
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  • lellyminelellymine member
    edited April 2014
    Read247 said:


    lellymine said:

    I just got the ugly gift today. If I had gotten it when I started the other gift thread, you're right it would've made sense to combine the two. Mostly, I donate gifts I don't like but since this was a homemade one I wanted others opinions.

    @Merie412 is correct. Threads do not expire. There is an edit button. So it would've made sense to edit your original thread and make it a best gift/worst gift thread, or even gifts: bitch/brag. There is also the "baby shower" thread, the AW/SS thread, Newbie Playdate pt 2 (where you could ask STMs what they did with "ugly" gifts) or Monday Bitchfest. Personally I don't think that you needed your very own thread for this discussion, but maybe that's because it just rubs me the wrong way. It makes you sound like an ungrateful brat. Put the ugly bow on LO's head, snap a picture and send a handwritten thank you card.  She took the time to make it for you, the least you could do is be polite about it.


    ~~~Quote fail~~~
    Sorry the thread annoyed you. Of course I'll be sending a thank you card. That was never in question. I don't know how it came across that I'd ever be impolite to her. I specifically asked if others had the baby wear things to please the relative. Just getting others opinions on how to best handle it, especially since it is a handmade gift and I don't want to hurt her feelings. Both of which I said in an earlier post.
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  • Read247Read247 member
    lellymine said:
    I agree but what if it's homemade? My aunt just figured out how to make hair bows and sent me a package of 30. They're bad, really bad (Barbie, Hello Kitty and My Little Pony) but since she spent time making them I don't want to hurt her feelings. I don't know when I'd put them on LO though. And she's planning on sending more. :-S

    Here's the breakdown:

    Your aunt figured out how to make hair bows and sent you a package of 30. Assorted - Barbie, Hello Kitty and My Little Pony. - that's was unbelievably nice and thoughtful of her yet you say "I don't know when I'd put them on LO though." Well, if she sent 30 I'm sure you could figure out an outfit to pair them with or a time to put them on. But "they're bad, really bad" so obviously they're not your style and you think they're ugly (which you said in your original post). "And she's planning on sending more" :-S - OH THE HORROR!!!

    30 is a lot of bows. Even if they were simple multiply that by 30. That was extremely thoughtful of her and probably time consuming, yet you created a thread to basically make fun of them. THAT is what bothers me. I'm glad you're considering her feelings and not saying anything negative to her, but the tone of your post makes you sound ungrateful and bratty.

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  • JmeJoLee83JmeJoLee83 member
    MIL bought a onesie that says "stop texting and change me". Umm yeah,
    LO will not be wearing that. I just don't think it's funny and I don't even text that much so I don't get it. If she asks,
    I will have him wear it around the house when she happens to be over. Thankfully, he will outgrow it soon.
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