Just miscarried... have some questions

antandbee · March 2014

DH and I had been TTC since December. We finally got a positive test this month, and at just 5 weeks, we lost the baby two days ago. He took me in to the doctor, hoping our little one might be surviving, but she confirmed the miscarry. I was too upset to think of questions while we were there, and google has advised me on no tampons or sex until bleeding stops. She didn't tell me any of this! I still am curious though, I see that lots of other girls have been able to get pregnant again as early as two weeks after their miscarriage. Is this two weeks after the bleeding stops or two weeks after the date of the miscarriage? I am expecting to bleed for about two weeks (I think that's average) so I'm not sure when we can try again. My fertility friend is all whacked out now... not able to predict an upcoming ovulation date or fertile days...

This is the most awful experience! I feel confused as to why this is hurting so much when it was such an early loss. How are you guys all coping? DH has been amazing, but I know you all understand what it is like to go through this.
Praying we can all have healthy little ones soon,
B

AggieBeth06 · March 2014

I am so sorry for your loss.

I'm not sure if your doc said this to you or not - but if you run a fever or fill more than a pad an hour for an hour or more, get to an ER immediately.

It will be very tough to predict an O because your hormones are nuts, but I have read that there is a fertile window right after a natural MC. There's no way to predict how your body is going to adjust.

Also, a loss is a loss. Allow yourselves to grieve. Women who have chemical pregnancies (earliest loss) are just as entitled to grieve as someone who has a later loss.... Although the process and pain maybe different. It is ok to hurt and ok to be excited to try again.

Just in case - if you post on TTCAL, be careful with your words. To some women it would be offensive to hear "finally" in conjunction with a BFP after only 3 cycles. There are ladies who have struggled with the process for a long time. 3 cycles is below average, and reading that feels like a slap to women who have been trying for many cycles (upwards of years sometimes).

stephy1221 · March 2014

I am so sorry for your loss. I would call your doctor back with your questions. each woman and pregancy loss is different and your doctor can best tell you what is in your best interest.

As for me my doctor asked that we wait once full cycle post miscarriage before TTC.

barely · March 2014

So sorry for your loss. Everyone is different and my OB told me bleeding after natural mc can last up to 6 weeks. I don't think anyone can predict what your next cycle will be like as it I'll be different for everyone. I had a D&C, but my OB told me my cycles following could be anywhere from 3-12 weeks.

MessyMommy · March 2014

Im so sorry for your loss, we lost our little one in Nov at 8 weeks and it was extremely heart wrenching so we are all here for you.

As others have stated, my OB advised we wait one FULL cycle before we try again and I bled for about a week to a week and a half AFTER confirmed MC … I bled for about 3-4 days leading to an official "diagnosis" of MC …

Hang in there!

JCM285 · March 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss. Like the PPs have said, every m/c is totally different, so only a medical professional can really say what is the best TTCAL plan for you. I have had two m/cs and received different advice each time based on the circumstances. Also, I used Fertility Friend and after m/c, it can not predict your O times or cycle until you get a new period. Just be patient with yourself and take some time to breathe and relax. All m/cs are so stressful and I've found that I have been better at coping with TTCAL after I've taken a bit of a break for myself and DH. Welcome to the board.

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