Hitting

JoJo716 · March 2014

Today we had a play date with a baby that is 8 weeks younger than ds. However, there is a pretty large size gap (ds is 22 lbs and the other baby is 15 lbs). Anyway, ds would randomly start hitting the other baby! Like swatting him in the face. Ugh, it was awful. His friend would immediately start crying and I felt so bad. Each time ds hit him, I picked him up and said, "No, we do not hit." He did this at least three times. I have no clue what to do other than gently correct him and redirect. PWHEWS, is this normal for this age? What are other ways of handling these situations? I know he is young and it is clear he doesn't really understand what he is doing, I just don't want it to develop into some thing more. I am probably over-reacting.

Angela183 · March 2014

I think it's pretty normal. My LO regularly hits us in the head and face. It seems to happen when she is excited.

JoJo716 · March 2014

@OLJ1010‌ he does the same with our dog! Thanks for the reassurance ladies. I am glad this seems to be just a phase and normal. I think I was extra anxious as well because the friend was the helicopter mom I have mentioned before. She seemed to handle it well but I doubt we will be invited for another play date anytime soon

Kashy · March 2014

Yeah, DS loves to touch faces and it has turned into hitting and grabbing. I also do as PP have said and I will stop him from hitting/grabbing and then show him how to be gentle and say "we have to be gentle". He pulls the cats hair all of the time too and I will show him how to be gentle with her as well. Not really sure what else to do.

pnutg · March 2014

My son hits other babies/young kids and screams in their faces. Its embarassing. Obviously he needd to socialize with children more but this deters me from going to playgroups!

JoJo716 · March 2014

@pnutg‌ I feel the same way!

Lolalipsy · March 2014

Obviously I don't let E bash other children but I think unless they are really hurting eachother to just let them be. I never know how other mum's feel about this, some are the same as me and let them go but most don't even let them touch faces.

huzzahuzza · March 2014

pnutg said:

My son hits other babies/young kids and screams in their faces. Its embarassing. Obviously he needd to socialize with children more but this deters me from going to playgroups!

I don't know if this is really the case... J is with his buddy who is 2 weeks older than him every.single.day and he still does this with her. I honestly think it's just them trying to get to know each other. Obviously, redirecting and letting them know what gentle touch looks and feels like is very helpful but I think it's part of natural development.

pnutg · March 2014

C is really rough though. And at almost 28 lbs, he's always the biggest baby there. He screams really high pitched, grabs, hits and sometimes cries.

blush64 · March 2014

A is around other kids a lot. When she hits or pulls hair we take her hand amd show her how to be gentle while saying gentle. One day she might get it. I make sure the older kids don't laugh or encourage her.

My niece was really in to hitting and slapping. She would do it to all other babies and kids. The only thing that really worked was keeping her away from smaller babies until she got a bit older and could understand not to do it. She was never near A unless I was holding her or sitting with them, and even then she managed to get a few hits in. I would just tell her "gentle, nice" in a nice voice.

Leaving the kids alone would have meant one of them is getting hurt. Even with kids her own age she was really aggressive. She is now about 21 months and is so much better. She can be around anyone now and things are fine.

I don't mind a child touching but if you know your kid hits and bites you should be close enough to stop most of it. Edit Sorry, we had an incident this week at the baby gym. One mother sat back with her coffee while her daughter hit, slapped, pulled hair and was a mini terror. The baby was a sweet little girl but she needed her mom to keep her away from the other babies until she is old enough to learn not to act like that. Babies are just babies but the mom should know better.

Lolalipsy · March 2014

@blush64 it drives me insane when they sit and drink their coffee whilst I end up monitoring and playing with their children.

JoJo716 · March 2014

@blush64‌ I was right by him the entire time and any time he started to hit (or looked like he was on the verge), I stepped in. Plus, I don't even drink coffee

I do think you may be right about the size issue. I like your suggestion of steering clear until he is out of this phase.

blush64 · March 2014

@JoJo716‌ I am sorry, I really did not mean you. I go to a baby gym most mornings and there is a woman who always sits back with a coffee or tea while her baby crawls around, and it is a pretty big gym. Her baby is just too young to know better.

My niece was a very difficult baby when she was around other babies. She was so smart it was scary, she just happened to love to poke, hit, smack and bite. She was always watched around other kids but sometimes babies are just quick. My sister found it less stressful for herself to limit her time at the gym and similar places. She outgrew it eventually.

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