How brave are you with the boob?

trebekastan · March 2014

whataboutscience said:

I plan to bf, but I don't think I could even do this in front of family besides DH. I am extremely conservative and modest though. Even if I had a good body, I would never consider a bikini or mini skirt, not even when I was in high school.

Mini Skirts and bikinis are sexual things though. They are meant to be alluring and provocative. BFing is not either of those things and has nothing to do with modesty. I really don't like the fact that you have equated it to being proper or not.

JSS1002 · March 2014

lstrejcek said:

whataboutscience said:

I plan to bf, but I don't think I could even do this in front of family besides DH. I am extremely conservative and modest though. Even if I had a good body, I would never consider a bikini or mini skirt, not even when I was in high school.

Mini Skirts and bikinis are sexual things though. They are meant to be alluring and provocative. BFing is not either of those things and has nothing to do with modesty. I really don't like the fact that you have equated it to being proper or not.

I think it is really unfair of you to judge how this person feels about their OWN body. She's not telling anybody else what to feel or do. Again, I will say, don't let anybody make you feel bad about your choices, no matter what they are. The important thing is that the baby gets fed. Happy mom = happy baby.

trebekastan · March 2014

JSS1002 said:

lstrejcek said:

whataboutscience said:

I plan to bf, but I don't think I could even do this in front of family besides DH. I am extremely conservative and modest though. Even if I had a good body, I would never consider a bikini or mini skirt, not even when I was in high school.

Mini Skirts and bikinis are sexual things though. They are meant to be alluring and provocative. BFing is not either of those things and has nothing to do with modesty. I really don't like the fact that you have equated it to being proper or not.

I think it is really unfair of you to judge how this person feels about their OWN body. She's not telling anybody else what to feel or do. Again, I will say, don't let anybody make you feel bad about your choices, no matter what they are. The important thing is that the baby gets fed. Happy mom = happy baby.

No, what she did was to equate being modest to not NIP. Saying that you are "conservative and modest" and wouldn't wear bikinis or mini skirts even if she had the body for it is saying that if you do either of those things, TO HER, that isn't modesty. While I agree that wearing bikinis and miniskirts isn't modest, it is rude and damaging to other "conservative and modest" women to also allude to NIP as not being modest.

SingleMom31 · March 2014

MrsSparklebottom said:

meganmccr said:

This is prob why I only lasted nursing DD for 3 months. I Definately didn't feel comfirtable nursing in public. I honestly think it's the size of your boobs haha I have enormous boobs that can't be taken out discretely. I think ppl with smaller breasts can keep them hidden a little easier:)

I'm at least a DD when pregnant/nursing. It's not boob size, it's comfort level. Which is fine, but plenty of large breasted women NIP.

I was a 34G pre-pregnancy and either an H or I while nursing... It's not about size. I had good nursing bras that covered almost everything anyway, and my shirt/a blanket over my stomach/her head covered the rest.

amyc216 · March 2014

I always wore a cover in public or at people's houses. At my house (if women company were over) I'd just use a little burp cloth for modesty. If men were over, I'd just go to another room. I'm in GA.

JSS1002 · March 2014

lstrejcek said:

JSS1002 said:

lstrejcek said:

whataboutscience said:

I plan to bf, but I don't think I could even do this in front of family besides DH. I am extremely conservative and modest though. Even if I had a good body, I would never consider a bikini or mini skirt, not even when I was in high school.

Mini Skirts and bikinis are sexual things though. They are meant to be alluring and provocative. BFing is not either of those things and has nothing to do with modesty. I really don't like the fact that you have equated it to being proper or not.

I think it is really unfair of you to judge how this person feels about their OWN body. She's not telling anybody else what to feel or do. Again, I will say, don't let anybody make you feel bad about your choices, no matter what they are. The important thing is that the baby gets fed. Happy mom = happy baby.

No, what she did was to equate being modest to not NIP. Saying that you are "conservative and modest" and wouldn't wear bikinis or mini skirts even if she had the body for it is saying that if you do either of those things, TO HER, that isn't modesty. While I agree that wearing bikinis and miniskirts isn't modest, it is rude and damaging to other "conservative and modest" women to also allude to NIP as not being modest.

I believe she was talking about herself, her body ,her clothing choices, and her NIP choices. Not anybody elses. She has every right in the world to feel however she wants about those things in relation to HER life / body. If she had said OTHER people shouldn't wear those clothes or NIP because it was immodest that would be an entirely different story.

SingleMom31 · March 2014

Also, on a side note, I found that I got a TON more stares if DD was fussing or screaming in public than if I was breastfeeding. Heck, if I nursed her and she fell asleep (human pacifier, if you will), nobody paid any attention to us.... screaming baby in a restaurant, everyone notices.

beck12803 · March 2014

I nursed DD1 for a year and a half, all through and after my pregnancy with DD2 and never was able to gain the confidence to NIP. With or without a cover. And I was always so envious of women who I saw doing it without second thought. However, with DD2, after a few months I was able to NIP with a cover or a blanket. Which really made life easier!

One thing that helped my confidence is that I realized, with a cover...
-People who are uncomfortable with being around nursing mothers probably haven't had close, personal experience with someone nursing.
-If I was using a cover, those who knew what was happening under the cover probably have had some experience with nursing and likely wouldn't even look twice at it.
-Those who would likely be uncomfortable or judgmental about NIPing probably wouldn't know what I was doing under the cover.

Hope this brings anyone else the confidence it gave me. :-) Just be secure and confident in whatever you choose. No shame in any of it.

trebekastan · March 2014

JSS1002 said:

lstrejcek said:

JSS1002 said:

lstrejcek said:

whataboutscience said:

I plan to bf, but I don't think I could even do this in front of family besides DH. I am extremely conservative and modest though. Even if I had a good body, I would never consider a bikini or mini skirt, not even when I was in high school.

Mini Skirts and bikinis are sexual things though. They are meant to be alluring and provocative. BFing is not either of those things and has nothing to do with modesty. I really don't like the fact that you have equated it to being proper or not.

I think it is really unfair of you to judge how this person feels about their OWN body. She's not telling anybody else what to feel or do. Again, I will say, don't let anybody make you feel bad about your choices, no matter what they are. The important thing is that the baby gets fed. Happy mom = happy baby.

No, what she did was to equate being modest to not NIP. Saying that you are "conservative and modest" and wouldn't wear bikinis or mini skirts even if she had the body for it is saying that if you do either of those things, TO HER, that isn't modesty. While I agree that wearing bikinis and miniskirts isn't modest, it is rude and damaging to other "conservative and modest" women to also allude to NIP as not being modest.

I believe she was talking about herself, her body ,her clothing choices, and her NIP choices. Not anybody elses. She has every right in the world to feel however she wants about those things in relation to HER life / body. If she had said OTHER people shouldn't wear those clothes or NIP because it was immodest that would be an entirely different story.

I know she was talking about herself, her body, her clothing choices, and her NIP choices. I just happen to think that she is equating NIP to wearing a mini skirt or bikini, which are both purposefully provocative. I have now gone in a circle and am restating my original post.

JSS1002 · March 2014

lstrejcek said:

JSS1002 said:

lstrejcek said:

JSS1002 said:

lstrejcek said:

whataboutscience said:

I plan to bf, but I don't think I could even do this in front of family besides DH. I am extremely conservative and modest though. Even if I had a good body, I would never consider a bikini or mini skirt, not even when I was in high school.

Mini Skirts and bikinis are sexual things though. They are meant to be alluring and provocative. BFing is not either of those things and has nothing to do with modesty. I really don't like the fact that you have equated it to being proper or not.

I think it is really unfair of you to judge how this person feels about their OWN body. She's not telling anybody else what to feel or do. Again, I will say, don't let anybody make you feel bad about your choices, no matter what they are. The important thing is that the baby gets fed. Happy mom = happy baby.

No, what she did was to equate being modest to not NIP. Saying that you are "conservative and modest" and wouldn't wear bikinis or mini skirts even if she had the body for it is saying that if you do either of those things, TO HER, that isn't modesty. While I agree that wearing bikinis and miniskirts isn't modest, it is rude and damaging to other "conservative and modest" women to also allude to NIP as not being modest.

I believe she was talking about herself, her body ,her clothing choices, and her NIP choices. Not anybody elses. She has every right in the world to feel however she wants about those things in relation to HER life / body. If she had said OTHER people shouldn't wear those clothes or NIP because it was immodest that would be an entirely different story.

I know she was talking about herself, her body, her clothing choices, and her NIP choices. I just happen to think that she is equating NIP to wearing a mini skirt or bikini, which are both purposefully provocative. I have now gone in a circle and am restating my original post.

I'm probably restating my original post too, and I guess it's just agree to disagree, but I think she's perfectly within her rights to feel that way about all of those things. If she feels NIP is immodest FOR HER, so be it. Telling her she's wrong and making her feel bad about it doesn't make it any easier for her to get comfortable with the idea.

trebekastan · March 2014

JSS1002 said:

lstrejcek said:

JSS1002 said:

lstrejcek said:

JSS1002 said:

lstrejcek said:

whataboutscience said:

I plan to bf, but I don't think I could even do this in front of family besides DH. I am extremely conservative and modest though. Even if I had a good body, I would never consider a bikini or mini skirt, not even when I was in high school.

Mini Skirts and bikinis are sexual things though. They are meant to be alluring and provocative. BFing is not either of those things and has nothing to do with modesty. I really don't like the fact that you have equated it to being proper or not.

I think it is really unfair of you to judge how this person feels about their OWN body. She's not telling anybody else what to feel or do. Again, I will say, don't let anybody make you feel bad about your choices, no matter what they are. The important thing is that the baby gets fed. Happy mom = happy baby.

No, what she did was to equate being modest to not NIP. Saying that you are "conservative and modest" and wouldn't wear bikinis or mini skirts even if she had the body for it is saying that if you do either of those things, TO HER, that isn't modesty. While I agree that wearing bikinis and miniskirts isn't modest, it is rude and damaging to other "conservative and modest" women to also allude to NIP as not being modest.

I believe she was talking about herself, her body ,her clothing choices, and her NIP choices. Not anybody elses. She has every right in the world to feel however she wants about those things in relation to HER life / body. If she had said OTHER people shouldn't wear those clothes or NIP because it was immodest that would be an entirely different story.

I know she was talking about herself, her body, her clothing choices, and her NIP choices. I just happen to think that she is equating NIP to wearing a mini skirt or bikini, which are both purposefully provocative. I have now gone in a circle and am restating my original post.

I'm probably restating my original post too, and I guess it's just agree to disagree, but I think she's perfectly within her rights to feel that way about all of those things. If she feels NIP is immodest FOR HER, so be it. Telling her she's wrong and making her feel bad about it doesn't make it any easier for her to get comfortable with the idea.

I never said she shouldn't feel that way, she can say that NIP is not for her because she would feel uncomfortable with it like half of the other women did in this post. The issue I have is that she is equating it with wearing provocative clothing, as if it was something sexual. I don't care about her feelings on this issue, I care about the other women who would never wear bikinis or minis because of modesty and having them think that they should be feel immodest for NIP.

LisaKF3 · March 2014

I really really thought I would be comfortable breast feeding in public. The few times I did, I felt very uncomfortable. I don't know why exactly. Maybe it was all those postpartum emotions, I don't know.

essiemtz · March 2014

:x

bumpuser5078523 · March 2014

My son hated the cover. He would always pull it around and I was exposed anyway. I needed both hands to nurse thanks to big boobs, so a third hand would have been helpful.

In public I would find a dressing room or nurse him in the car without a cover. If they are offended, quit snooping in my car!

At friend's/family's houses I would quickly get him on and adjust my shirt. No one would see much of my boob. If he was being difficult, I had a burp rag I could use.

ETA I think if nursing was easier for us, NIP would have been super easy and I would have done it more. I wish I could have had him in the crook of my arm and he would stay latched. It would have been so nice!

When I did choose to nurse in a vacant bedroom, most people tried to get me to stay. Which was encouraging, but I turned it down due to the difficult time we had.

I live in Montana.

I have seen one lady nursing without a cover. I smiled at her.

CplusJ=S · March 2014

essiemtz said:
I believe that every woman should have the rite to breastfeed whenever possible but I strongly believe that a woman should take other people into consideration before they publicly breastfeed with NO cover. Why? Well think about it. If you normally don't whip out your boob why would you do it now! Yes I know cuz you see it normal, feeding your baby but for other people its NOT! However being brave or not is a matter of choice yet in my opinion before you make that decision lets think about others. :P

I have already covered this in my last response on this topic, but when have you ever seen a woman "whip out her boob" to feed her child? I see mothers nursing without a cover often here in So Cal and not once have I seen one flash their boob to anyone. Maybe you have never seen someone NIP before. Even without a cover, it is very discreet. People like you are the problem with this society. ::insert huge eye roll here::

mrsdanielleM2010 · March 2014

essiemtz said:

I believe that every woman should have the rite to breastfeed whenever possible but I strongly believe that a woman should take other people into consideration before they publicly breastfeed with NO cover. Why? Well think about it. If you normally don't whip out your boob why would you do it now! Yes I know cuz you see it normal, feeding your baby but for other people its NOT! However being brave or not is a matter of choice yet in my opinion before you make that decision lets think about others. :P

As a FTM I have no clue how I will feel about public nursing myself, so I have stayed out of this thread so far. That said, I think you've missed so many of the good points made by the wise women in this thread, so let me summarize for you: if nursing is not normal to other people they can kindly mind their business. There is nothing sexual or immodest about public nursing. The whole entire boob doesn't come out. If someone wants to use a cover, bully for them. I may be one of them, who knows. But if someone wants to not use a cover, bully for them. If everyone could be that brave there would be fewer people sharing your opinion and that is a good thing.

Irisheyes1247 · March 2014

essiemtz said:
I believe that every woman should have the rite to breastfeed whenever possible but I strongly believe that a woman should take other people into consideration before they publicly breastfeed with NO cover. Why? Well think about it. If you normally don't whip out your boob why would you do it now! Yes I know cuz you see it normal, feeding your baby but for other people its NOT! However being brave or not is a matter of choice yet in my opinion before you make that decision lets think about others. :P

You know, you are right. I don't normally take out my boobs in public. But you know what I do in public on the regular? And what I expect my infant to want to do as well? Eat. And guess what? Babies are not rational beings. When they are hungry, they are hungry now. You cannot tell you newborn, "I'm sorry baby, but you eating will make people uncomfortable right now, you understand, don't you?" Because they don't. If their food comes from your boob, that is just how it's going to be. Babies want to eat when they want to eat and they get what they want.

JSS1002 · March 2014

I honestly think that one of the biggest parts of normalizing NIP is that we should ALL stop using annoying phrases like "whip out a boob." You aren't whipping out a boob. You're nursing. The end. It isn't like you have tassels on your tits and are ripping your shirt off and shaking it for the world to see.

chusum · March 2014

I guess I'm brave. I used to be pretty modest, but after flashing everyone the insides of my reproductive organs while giving birth feeding my baby in public was really no big deal. I used to judge people that nursed in public, especially without a cover, but to be honest who wants to eat under a blanket or in a bathroom stall. Nursing in public is very much legal, and shouldn't even be a question. If someone wants to cover up then fine, I'll tell you from experience that a 6 month old will pull off a cover in an instant. And to add I live in the deep south, so I don't think it's a big city thing.

ETA: I never just pulled my boob out, I usually wore something nursing friendly, that I could easily pull out my breast and quickly put the nipple in her mouth. Sometimes I covered, but sometimes I didn't.

LexiT88 · March 2014

I BFed my first and plan on doing so with my second. The only person I felt completely comfortable nursing (bare boob) in front of was DH. As far as NIP or in front of anyone else I used the UDDER cover. The cover didn't seem to bother DS or anyone else. I never left a room to nurse and thankfully no one ever asked me to, they would not have been happy with my answer.

Edit: spelling

T&HLove · March 2014

I usually covered with my first, my husband was more comfortable. This time, I fully intend to nip wherever whenever with or without a cover. Anyone who has a problem with that is simply ignorant.

essiemtz · March 2014

I think you all are taking too personal! Yes I have seen women BF in public with or without a cover. Like I said I KNOW that you are BF your child & yes you have too! However, there are some women who ARE discrete about it and SOME that are NOT! When I said to whip out your boob.....well YES they have! Yet all I said was to take people into consideration! I know how important it is to BF & that you have to feed your baby! At the end of the day regardeless if you use a cover or not you are going to BF your baby. How you do it (like I said) its your choice! However DO take people into consideration! Just like you are in title to voice your opinion other people are too!

T&HLove · March 2014

essiemtz said:

I think you all are taking too personal! Yes I have seen women BF in public with or without a cover. Like I said I KNOW that you are BF your child & yes you have too! However, there are some women who ARE discrete about it and SOME that are NOT! When I said to whip out your boob.....well YES they have! Yet all I said was to take people into consideration! I know how important it is to BF & that you have to feed your baby! At the end of the day regardeless if you use a cover or not you are going to BF your baby. How you do it (like I said) its your choice! However DO take people into consideration! Just like you are in title to voice your opinion other people are too!

You are absolutely entitled to your own opinion. But I don't have to take it into consideration. And I won't.

If the way I feed my child offends you, stop looking. Or how about you go eat YOUR lunch in the bathroom? Then, you won't have to see the same amount of boob you might see in my bathing suit.

essiemtz · March 2014

Lol.....Like I said ya take it too personal or way out of proportion! Feeding your child is not the offensive part rather having the boob hanging out while the baby is feeding on the other one is! Yet im not referring to any one of you but rather to what I have seen! A lot of us are very discreet yet there are others that are not! Its not my intention to get anyone upset & I am not trying to change your way (s) of thinking! I just posted my veiw on it based on what I have seen! :-?

allrightmeow · March 2014

essiemtz said:

Lol.....Like I said ya take it too personal or way out of proportion! Feeding your child is not the offensive part rather having the boob hanging out while the baby is feeding on the other one is! Yet im not referring to any one of you but rather to what I have seen! A lot of us are very discreet yet there are others that are not! Its not my intention to get anyone upset & I am not trying to change your way (s) of thinking! I just posted my veiw on it based on what I have seen! :-?

You do understand that by telling woman that we need to take everyone else around us into consideration before we do what our bodies were made to do for our babies is a little out of line, right? Look at the link I posted in my first response to this thread. In fact I'll post a more condensed version again.

https://www.buzzfeed.com/southerndisposition/25-historical-images-that-normalize-breastfeeding-jlw6

Look at those photos. Look at the dates on them. No one is glaring at those mothers. No one appears to be uncomfortable. Why do you think that is? BF should not be something we have to hide away in a corner to do "discreetly" like it's wrong. I and others don't feel immodest doing it without a cover.

No one is telling you not to have your opinion but its rude to turn around and attempt to dismiss everyones responses to what you had to say with "lol ya'll are taking it too personal or out of proportion". When we have people who share your backwards view, look at the pictures your view is in fact backwards and a product of the male hang up with breasts as sexual playthings, giving us nasty looks and making rude comments to us, it's very personal.

essiemtz · March 2014

Yes I have one was hanging while the baby was feeding on the other one. The baby couldn't decide which one to take so she just left it. This happen on the bus. I did look the other way but this most of the people but this woman was loud and didn't care even when her friends told her!

essiemtz · March 2014

Lol...I think ya need to read carefully. Its not about starring or being sexual or that BF in public is bad.....I never said any of that! Yes I have BF but there are ways in doing things. To all the women who are discrete & do take other people into consideration THANK YOU!

allrightmeow · March 2014

essiemtz said:

Lol...I think ya need to read carefully. Its not about starring or being sexual or that BF in public is bad.....I never said any of that! Yes I have BF but there are ways in doing things. To all the women who are discrete & do take other people into consideration THANK YOU!

So what is it about exactly? Do you find breast offensive full stop? If you are saying you don't hold them equal to cocks and vaginas which are sexual organs, what exactly is your issue? Since you are telling people what they should "DO" I sincerely want to understand WHY. Do you know that there are states where it's totally legal for females to be completely topless in public?

My issue with taking other people into consideration is that everyones comfort level is completely different. That means that I'll never be able to accommodate everyone so Im not going to tie myself up in knots trying to. ::shrugs:: It's a breast feeding a baby, not an erect bare cock getting ready for a gangbang.

essiemtz · March 2014

Read my first 2 post maybe you will understand better. Just as you are strong about your opinion so am I.

allrightmeow · March 2014

Yes yes I read all your posts. You don't like the "whipping out of the boobs" yet it's not because of "people staring", or them "being sexual", or that "breast feeding is bad". So.........? Doesn't really answer any of the questions asked but mmkay.

Again, everyone here has stated and is entitled to their opinion. The issue is you telling women here what to "DO". When you start telling people what they should "DO" it shifts from opinion to unsolicited advice.

That Americans are so hung up about BF in this day and age is insane. Night lovely ladies.

essiemtz · March 2014

I am sorry that I was not clear I ment it to ladies who dont care and are not discrete about it & that they think it's ok to let them loose. Perhaps you are not aware that there are all sort of people that do crazy things however you are very lucky if you haven't seen crazy things. Yes ladies gn.

mrsdanielleM2010 · March 2014

essiemtz said:

I am sorry that I was not clear I ment it to ladies who dont care and are not discrete about it & that they think it's ok to let them loose. Perhaps you are not aware that there are all sort of people that do crazy things however you are very lucky if you haven't seen crazy things. Yes ladies gn.

BetsyDavis · March 2014

I have never done that I have only actually BF in public a handful of times and I was always very covered up. For me BF is a very private thing. My first two I never BF in public at all.

Ceridwen21 · March 2014

I have no problem whatsoever breastfeeding in public. I mean, I wouldn't whip it out in a room full of DH's friends or anything, but if I'm in public or mixed company, I feel my child when it needs to be fed, and I only use a cover if I happen to have something nearby.

I have a very small chest though (AA) so maybe that has something to do with my non-modesty. Beyond the nipple, there's really not much to see!

CplusJ=S · March 2014

For the love of god, can we please stop using the term "whip it out". I'm pretty sure 99% of the women in the US who breastfeed in public do not whip it out.

T&HLove · March 2014

Essiemtz will never get it.. And that's okay. Because we don't have to listen to her. Yay for breast feeding rights!

T&HLove · March 2014

CplusJ=S said:
For the love of god, can we please stop using the term "whip it out". I'm pretty sure 99% of the women in the US who breastfeed in public do not whip it out.

Mine aren't big enough to "whip"

bumpuser10199668 · March 2014

CplusJ=S said:

For the love of god, can we please stop using the term "whip it out". I'm pretty sure 99% of the women in the US who breastfeed in public do not whip it out.

This sounds like the equivalent to pound it out or slap it out. Very....dirty.

aggiefrau08 · March 2014

I used a blanket at first with DS, but quickly stopped. I won't have a problem NIP this time.

And speaking of things I wish people would stop saying in regards to NIP: calling breasts "tits". 1) I hate that word unless it's used jokingly, i.e., "These tacos are the tits!" 2) It's a sexual word, so people who use it in reference to a woman NIP are using it on purpose to make NIP seem sexual and shame her into stopping.

essiemtz · March 2014

I was never arguing......love

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