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UO

BC&LMBC&LM member
in June 2013 Moms
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Re: UO

  • BC&LMBC&LM member
    I liked the finale at Lost. I didn't absolutely love it, but I liked it well enough.
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  • BC&LMBC&LM member
    calikat80 said:
    I think recently people are too quick to call "OMGZ mommy wars!!!" About every little topic. I don't understand why people can't have educated opinions and discussions about just about any issue without getting super crazy. I've always enjoyed debate though so maybe it's just me. I mean DH and I fell in love out at a bar because we argued about nationalized healthcare for 3 hours so it's probably just me. I also believe that supporting your argument and hearing other opinions is a healthy part of making adult decisions. So yeah, I don't get the whole mommy wars thing because all the women I am friends with, and have differing opinions with, are all smart enough to just discuss things instead of crying and rocking in the corner and calling people bullies.
    I agree for the most part, but there are certain topics I would categorize as definite  "mommy wars" topics like breastfeeding/formula and daycare/SAHM.  But honestly, if someone else feeds their kid non-organic food and I feed my kid organic food, what's the sense in a war over something like that? It's just an issue of personal preference, and by explaining why you are on the side you are on, I don't see why it should be classified as a "mommy war. "
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  • kelseypiekelseypie member
    calikat80 said:

    I think recently people are too quick to call "OMGZ mommy wars!!!" About every little topic. I don't understand why people can't have educated opinions and discussions about just about any issue without getting super crazy. I've always enjoyed debate though so maybe it's just me. I mean DH and I fell in love out at a bar because we argued about nationalized healthcare for 3 hours so it's probably just me. I also believe that supporting your argument and hearing other opinions is a healthy part of making adult decisions.
    So yeah, I don't get the whole mommy wars thing because all the women I am friends with, and have differing opinions with, are all smart enough to just discuss things instead of crying and rocking in the corner and calling people bullies.

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  • BunnyLove416BunnyLove416 member
    BC&LM said:
    I know in-home daycare providers deserve vacation too, but one of the reasons I prefer a center is that I don't end up paying for 2-4 weeks where I need to arrange backup babysitting because the in-home provider is going on vacation. (And yes, I do realize the centers probably figure the cost into their weekly rates, but I would rather see a slightly higher weekly rate than be out $200+ all at once for a week I have no care provided.)
    I think this depends more on the place than the type. We use an in home and don't pay for any days he's not there but my friend uses a center that closes for 2 weeks every year and has to pay for those weeks on top of whatever other childcare she lines up.
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  • numbersgirl08numbersgirl08 member
    BunnyLove416 said:


    BC&LM said:

    I know in-home daycare providers deserve vacation too, but one of the reasons I prefer a center is that I don't end up paying for 2-4 weeks where I need to arrange backup babysitting because the in-home provider is going on vacation. (And yes, I do realize the centers probably figure the cost into their weekly rates, but I would rather see a slightly higher weekly rate than be out $200+ all at once for a week I have no care provided.)

    I think this depends more on the place than the type. We use an in home and don't pay for any days he's not there but my friend uses a center that closes for 2 weeks every year and has to pay for those weeks on top of whatever other childcare she lines up.

    I get the inconvenience it can cause. But the convenience of still having childcare when LO is sick is much more worth it to me. I can plan around my nannys vacation time; it's much harder to plan around my LO being having a cold and slight fever. (If she was really sick I'd watch her myself but that's not the typical case).
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  • needanustartneedanustart member
    melOHdy said:

    Here goes:

    As long as they are using the same or similar methods for discipline, I absolutely think someone who is watching my child should discipline her if shes breaking rules. If she's.at a friend's house and is blatantly breaking rules and being disrespectful the parents should not risk the respect of their own kids because they are conflicted about what to do with mine.

    I'm a little confused by this- will you only let her play at friend's houses who have a similar form of discipline as you? I watch another little boy and I just always leave it in the parents court by saying, "well I'll have to give your mom and dad a report about this" and let them do what they feel is right. And G still knows that for him mommy is the boss and knows I will follow through on disciplining him the way he is used to.
    Someone spanked DH when he was on a play date at another house and his mom freaked out and I don't blame her ( and I'm not opposed to spanking).

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  • tiffletons518tiffletons518 member
    BC&LM said:
    I liked the finale at Lost. I didn't absolutely love it, but I liked it well enough.
    Unpopular. I feel like it didn't really answer things like it should've. And, I feel like they had no excuse because they knew for 2 seasons prior that they were done. So, basically they were all dead. They hadn't been dead the whole time, but died at some point. I think. And, why didn't Ben go in? Was he not really dead? Or, was that some sort of afterlife that he didn't feel "worthy" to pass on to? That would be totes Ben's style the woe is me whiner he was. I just feel like they could've done more. I know that whatever they did, there would've been some people who wouldn't have been happy. I just wanted the unhappy ones to be not me. Lol.
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  • needanustartneedanustart member
    melOHdy said:

    calikat80 said:

    melOHdy said:

    Here goes:

    As long as they are using the same or similar methods for discipline, I absolutely think someone who is watching my child should discipline her if shes breaking rules. If she's.at a friend's house and is blatantly breaking rules and being disrespectful the parents should not risk the respect of their own kids because they are conflicted about what to do with mine.

    I'm a little confused by this- will you only let her play at friend's houses who have a similar form of discipline as you? I watch another little boy and I just always leave it in the parents court by saying, "well I'll have to give your mom and dad a report about this" and let them do what they feel is right. And G still knows that for him mommy is the boss and knows I will follow through on disciplining him the way he is used to.
    Someone spanked DH when he was on a play date at another house and his mom freaked out and I don't blame her ( and I'm not opposed to spanking).
    I don't think it's effective to discipline 2+ hours after an incident happens. If a parent reports to me that lilly did x that was against the rules and was asked to sit by herself for 10 minutes I can have a talk with her about why what she did was against the rules and why she shouldn't do it again. I wouldn't discipline her again once we got home. Obviously things might change but I plan on having a conversion with lilly when dropping her off that goes something like, "ok Lilly make sure you're respectful and follow Mrs. Calikat80's rules. She's allowed to put you on time out (or whatever form of discipline we go with) because she's the boss in her house. I know you'll be good, I love you, and I'll see you soon"
    I guess I'd just have to see things on a more case by case basis. Liam (little guy I watch) is crushed by the idea of a time out. It's very effective, whereas G (mine) couldn't care less if I put him in time out. So I definitely use different tactics with each kid while they are misbehaving, but ultimately both kids know I'm the boss and I get to make the decisions about being punished.

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  • BC&LMBC&LM member
    BunnyLove416 said:
    BC&LM said:
    I know in-home daycare providers deserve vacation too, but one of the reasons I prefer a center is that I don't end up paying for 2-4 weeks where I need to arrange backup babysitting because the in-home provider is going on vacation. (And yes, I do realize the centers probably figure the cost into their weekly rates, but I would rather see a slightly higher weekly rate than be out $200+ all at once for a week I have no care provided.)
    I think this depends more on the place than the type. We use an in home and don't pay for any days he's not there but my friend uses a center that closes for 2 weeks every year and has to pay for those weeks on top of whatever other childcare she lines up.
    Wow, I wouldn't have picked that center! Ours only closes for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's Day.  They also do half days on the eves of those holidays.  Other than that, I believe it's just one Friday every year or two for a training day.  Plus, we get two weeks of vacation time after we have been there six months that we can use to not have to pay for weeks we are not sending him. Most of the other centers I looked at had a similar set up.  Based on your experience, I see in-homes aren't all the way I thought, but my friends/in-laws who have kids in in-homes have to pay even if the provider is sick or on vacation.  
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  • BC&LMBC&LM member
    edited March 2014
    numbersgirl08 said:
    BC&LM said:
    I know in-home daycare providers deserve vacation too, but one of the reasons I prefer a center is that I don't end up paying for 2-4 weeks where I need to arrange backup babysitting because the in-home provider is going on vacation. (And yes, I do realize the centers probably figure the cost into their weekly rates, but I would rather see a slightly higher weekly rate than be out $200+ all at once for a week I have no care provided.)
    I think this depends more on the place than the type. We use an in home and don't pay for any days he's not there but my friend uses a center that closes for 2 weeks every year and has to pay for those weeks on top of whatever other childcare she lines up.
    I get the inconvenience it can cause. But the convenience of still having childcare when LO is sick is much more worth it to me. I can plan around my nannys vacation time; it's much harder to plan around my LO being having a cold and slight fever. (If she was really sick I'd watch her myself but that's not the typical case).
    Nannies are a whole different ball game in my opinion than in-home centers. If I could afford a nanny, I wouldn't mind paying her vacation as part of the contract we negotiated. 

    ETA: Also, most daycares will take a kid with the sniffles as long as there is no fever or obvious infection.  If they didn't, they couldn't stay in business!
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  • BC&LMBC&LM member
    edited March 2014
    tiffletons518 said:
    BC&LM said:
    I liked the finale at Lost. I didn't absolutely love it, but I liked it well enough.
    Unpopular. I feel like it didn't really answer things like it should've. And, I feel like they had no excuse because they knew for 2 seasons prior that they were done. So, basically they were all dead. They hadn't been dead the whole time, but died at some point. I think. And, why didn't Ben go in? Was he not really dead? Or, was that some sort of afterlife that he didn't feel "worthy" to pass on to? That would be totes Ben's style the woe is me whiner he was. I just feel like they could've done more. I know that whatever they did, there would've been some people who wouldn't have been happy. I just wanted the unhappy ones to be not me. Lol.
    I don't feel like all questions need to be answered in a show like that.  The mystery is part of the attraction to me.  I love that there were still points open for debate.  Life doesn't tie things up in a pretty bow for us, so why do TV shows have to do so?

    ETA: Also, I thought only the flash-sideways world was their life after death.  Everything else actually happened in my opinion.
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  • dmlk413dmlk413 member
    BC&LM said:
    BunnyLove416 said:
    BC&LM said:
    I know in-home daycare providers deserve vacation too, but one of the reasons I prefer a center is that I don't end up paying for 2-4 weeks where I need to arrange backup babysitting because the in-home provider is going on vacation. (And yes, I do realize the centers probably figure the cost into their weekly rates, but I would rather see a slightly higher weekly rate than be out $200+ all at once for a week I have no care provided.)
    I think this depends more on the place than the type. We use an in home and don't pay for any days he's not there but my friend uses a center that closes for 2 weeks every year and has to pay for those weeks on top of whatever other childcare she lines up.
    Wow, I wouldn't have picked that center! Ours only closes for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's Day.  They also do half days on the eves of those holidays.  Other than that, I believe it's just one Friday every year or two for a training day.  Plus, we get two weeks of vacation time after we have been there six months that we can use to not have to pay for weeks we are not sending him. Most of the other centers I looked at had a similar set up.  Based on your experience, I see in-homes aren't all the way I thought, but my friends/in-laws who have kids in in-homes have to pay even if the provider is sick or on vacation.  
    It does suck to pay for days the daycare is closed but if you think about it, I get paid to take vacation and not be at work, why shouldn't the DCP?
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  • BunnyLove416BunnyLove416 member
    BC&LM said:
    BunnyLove416 said:
    BC&LM said:
    I know in-home daycare providers deserve vacation too, but one of the reasons I prefer a center is that I don't end up paying for 2-4 weeks where I need to arrange backup babysitting because the in-home provider is going on vacation. (And yes, I do realize the centers probably figure the cost into their weekly rates, but I would rather see a slightly higher weekly rate than be out $200+ all at once for a week I have no care provided.)
    I think this depends more on the place than the type. We use an in home and don't pay for any days he's not there but my friend uses a center that closes for 2 weeks every year and has to pay for those weeks on top of whatever other childcare she lines up.
    Wow, I wouldn't have picked that center! Ours only closes for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's Day.  They also do half days on the eves of those holidays.  Other than that, I believe it's just one Friday every year or two for a training day.  Plus, we get two weeks of vacation time after we have been there six months that we can use to not have to pay for weeks we are not sending him. Most of the other centers I looked at had a similar set up.  Based on your experience, I see in-homes aren't all the way I thought, but my friends/in-laws who have kids in in-homes have to pay even if the provider is sick or on vacation.  
    Yea I think it really depends on where you go, it's funny because we went with the in-home daycare for exactly this reason, I needed someone who would be flexible since my husband is a free lancer and I didn't want to pay for days I wasn't going to need care. My friend's center is wonderful but they you pay no matter what and they do a week in the fall and a week in the spring where they close down and change everything over, sort of like school. 
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  • numbersgirl08numbersgirl08 member
    BC&LM said:


    numbersgirl08 said:

    BunnyLove416 said:


    BC&LM said:

    I know in-home daycare providers deserve vacation too, but one of the reasons I prefer a center is that I don't end up paying for 2-4 weeks where I need to arrange backup babysitting because the in-home provider is going on vacation. (And yes, I do realize the centers probably figure the cost into their weekly rates, but I would rather see a slightly higher weekly rate than be out $200+ all at once for a week I have no care provided.)

    I think this depends more on the place than the type. We use an in home and don't pay for any days he's not there but my friend uses a center that closes for 2 weeks every year and has to pay for those weeks on top of whatever other childcare she lines up.
    I get the inconvenience it can cause. But the convenience of still having childcare when LO is sick is much more worth it to me. I can plan around my nannys vacation time; it's much harder to plan around my LO being having a cold and slight fever. (If she was really sick I'd watch her myself but that's not the typical case).

    Nannies are a whole different ball game in my opinion than in-home centers. If I could afford a nanny, I wouldn't mind paying her vacation as part of the contract we negotiated. 

    ETA: Also, most daycares will take a kid with the sniffles as long as there is no fever or obvious infection.  If they didn't, they couldn't stay in business!


    Ahh gotcha. I thought you were referring to nannies too.
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  • BC&LMBC&LM member
    dmlk413 said:
    BC&LM said:
    BunnyLove416 said:
    BC&LM said:
    I know in-home daycare providers deserve vacation too, but one of the reasons I prefer a center is that I don't end up paying for 2-4 weeks where I need to arrange backup babysitting because the in-home provider is going on vacation. (And yes, I do realize the centers probably figure the cost into their weekly rates, but I would rather see a slightly higher weekly rate than be out $200+ all at once for a week I have no care provided.)
    I think this depends more on the place than the type. We use an in home and don't pay for any days he's not there but my friend uses a center that closes for 2 weeks every year and has to pay for those weeks on top of whatever other childcare she lines up.
    Wow, I wouldn't have picked that center! Ours only closes for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's Day.  They also do half days on the eves of those holidays.  Other than that, I believe it's just one Friday every year or two for a training day.  Plus, we get two weeks of vacation time after we have been there six months that we can use to not have to pay for weeks we are not sending him. Most of the other centers I looked at had a similar set up.  Based on your experience, I see in-homes aren't all the way I thought, but my friends/in-laws who have kids in in-homes have to pay even if the provider is sick or on vacation.  
    It does suck to pay for days the daycare is closed but if you think about it, I get paid to take vacation and not be at work, why shouldn't the DCP?
    I'm not begrudging them their vacation time; I just feel that centers have so many staff members that they should schedule them all for vacations at different times rather than closing the center for two whole weeks.  Also, I prefer if a center pays for their staff members' vacations out of their operational costs.  If that means they need to charge $10 more per week to do that, so be it.  I do realize it all washes out the same in the end, moneywise, but I prefer not to pay all at once for a week of care that I will not receive.
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  • Ryanswifey619Ryanswifey619 member
    My uo is influenced by the thank you for my orgasm thread.. I don't wear any makeup other than mascara and eyeliner. Not sure if this is a true uo, but I don't know how to apply it honestly. My grams does Mary Kay, but she likes to over do it. I had someone do it for my wedding, but they moved away sadly.
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  • momofcatanmomofcatan member
    Wow 3:00 and all we have is daycare and lost? My $0.02 on daycare thing: we will be using an in home. The schedule is not great, there are a lot of random days she is closed and 2 week long stretches (goes by her kids school schedule). But my parents & ILs are willing to help us out on those days and I'm paying at least $200 less/month than a centre. She is also flexible about pickup time if you need it and I get to send DD to someone I know personally and trust. It's all about cost/benefit.

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  • nikel13nikel13 member
    @melOHdy H picked out mine.  I wouldn't want to know that the proposal was coming and I think that getting to pick the ring would make it to where you knew.
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  • Ryanswifey619Ryanswifey619 member
    CL8badB said:

    @Ryanswifey619‌ i wouldnt go by makeup that was professionally applied for your wedding. They usually put on a little bit more than you need bc they are applying it with your pictures in mind. Im sure that it was beautiful but you can do beautiful makeup by using less too. :)
    I recommend figuring out what shade you are and then just play around. Practice makes perfect. And just like anything else there are youtube tutorials!! :P
    My one tip is to make sure that the shade is right. Make sure that your face matches your neck. If you are going to wear makeup in the summer make sure you get another shade to match your tan. I HATE when people are tan but still apply their pre-tan makeup. Your face will look too light!!
    Oh and less is more! :)


    @CL8badB‌ thanks for the tips. My biggest thing is finding out the right shades for eyeshadow, finding a foundation-if I even need it-in the right shade. My mom slacked and never showed me how to do makeup. Same with my friends.
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  • needanustartneedanustart member
    @melOHdy‌ question (and anyone else really) about the discipline and other parents. Would you be ok with another parent spanking your child? We have used spanking like twice with G but I am totally not ok with someone else spanking my child. (I'm also not comfortable spanking someone else's child). Just wondering if I am a minority hypocrite in this one.

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  • nikel13nikel13 member
    @calikat80 I have spanked BIL, but H and I have practically raised him.  We have him 2-3 times a week minimum.  I don't know how I would feel about someone else spanking Lily.  My parents or H's parents, okay.  Random friend, not so much.
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  • No longer the bestNo longer the best member
    @melOHdy I picked out my rings and stuck a picture and where to go on the bulletin board in our office and I LOVE THEM so much. However he surprised me with simple diamond earrings on our wedding day and I have to say they do mean a bit more to me because of the total surprise/romance element.  

    So while I am perfectly happy to have chosen my ring I do see what you are saying.  
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  • BC&LMBC&LM member
    Ryanswifey619 said:

    My uo is influenced by the thank you for my orgasm thread.. I don't wear any makeup other than mascara and eyeliner. Not sure if this is a true uo, but I don't know how to apply it honestly. My grams does Mary Kay, but she likes to over do it. I had someone do it for my wedding, but they moved away sadly.


    I only wear makeup for special events, and some clear lip gloss here and there. Other than that, no make up. People were posting about no make up Monday earlier this week, and I was thinking, that's every Monday for me!
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