Post D&C check-in - how are you doing? — The Bump
Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Post D&C check-in - how are you doing?

Hey ladies - So two weeks ago today we discovered our little one had no heartbeat, and I had a D&C that same day. I've been spending a lot of time on this board and it has helped me so much!

I see lots of posts here about upcoming D&C's or "is this normal?" questions for after, but not many check-ins. I hope I'm allowed to start one! :) Anyway, if you've had a D&C sometime in the past, how are you doing now? I'll start.

When was your D&C: Two weeks ago today.

How are you feeling physically: Mostly fine. I'm still very tired every day (naps after work are the norm!). I've also been dealing with weird bleeding - there's no schedule to it! I'm fine for days, then have a random day of heavy cramps and bleeding, then nothing again for days.

How about emotionally: I went back to work 5 days post D&C, and am managing. I am struggling to keep up with my workload - I just zone out frequently. I'm not breaking down in tears anymore, but I just mentally shut down for long periods of time. Can't snap out of it. I only told one person at work in addition to immediate family and a few close friends, so at least I am not bombarded with sympathy and/or questions. On the other hand, it's very hard having this huge sadness and trying to keep it from everyone. What a weird place to be.

Share some happy: So, I've been hinting to DH for a while now that I think we should take dance lessons. He was predictably unenthusiastic. But for my birthday last week, he surprised me by signing us up for a ballroom dance class! Our first class was yesterday, and it was great. He even enjoyed it - although I'm not supposed to tell anyone that. ;) 
TTC since 8/13 
BFP #1 - 1/15/14  MMC/D&C 3/6/14
BFP #2 - 6/29/14 - on our first wedding anniversary! NMC 7/8/14
BFP #3 - 2/11/15 - Also found out I have MTHFR deficiency - taking Foltx for more folic acid!
BabyFruit Ticker

Re: Post D&C check-in - how are you doing?

  • When was your D&C: 3 1/2 weeks ago

    How are you feeling physically: Really good.  Sporadic spotting seemed to stop 8 days ago.  Am anxiously awaiting my BFN - yesterday I saw a very faint, had to squint to see, double pink line.  Can't wait until it's gone so that I know AF is around the corner. 

    How about emotionally: Dealing okay lately.  Still awaiting answers since I had 2 consecutive early pregnancy losses.  They were not able to grow any cells from the tissue extracted from my d&c, so we don't know for sure whether it was a chromosomal abnormality.  I go in for blood tests on Monday to test for/rule out thyroid, blood clotting, diabetes, etc...  All the waiting and wondering is difficult and definitely takes a toll. 

    Share some happy:  I really want to go out on a date with my hubby :-)  I haven't felt ready to go out and have fun in a social capacity since we found out about the loss, but I finally feel ready!

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  • When was your D&C: 6 days ago

    How are you feeling physically: Meh. Better. More back pain today than in the past few days. I cramp badly at night and have horrid, smelly, sour night sweats accompanied by chills. I've had a headache that won't go away and feel flu-like. I've not been sleeping well either. The upside is that I am much less sore from my complications and think I'll be ready to go back to church Sunday and work next week (although I'd rather lay here and mope).

    How about emotionally: mixed. I'm very foggy mentally and want to cry from time to time... Mainly frustrated that I'm ready to move forward but my body isn't letting me. I'm currently annoyed with my OB also. I also snap with anger more quickly.

    Share some happy: the weather is pretty and we should be able to break ground on our house in the next week.


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    PG#1 - 3rd cycle BFP. Team Green. HELLP syndrome @ 34 weeks.
    Later diagnosed with Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, possible link to HELLP.

    PG#2 M/C 3/14 - Surprise BFP 2/13. Beta's doubled every 52 hours from 3w5d-5w5d
    Viable pregnancy scan at 5w5d; 2nd u/s showed 2 days of growth in 7 but a HB of 120
    3rd u/s on 3/10/14 had no HB and baby had only grown 7 days over 14
    D&C 3/17/14 - complications - DX Retroflexed uterus, multiple tears to cervix

    All Welcome

    Chart

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  • @lav17‌ - you haven't ruined his bday! You can't help what happened.

    My bleeding pretty much stopped after about 24 hours. Then it picked up a few days later and I had some pretty nasty cramps, but I didn't have a normal d&c. I still had some things to pass/reabsorb. My 1 week follow up was today and she said she thought I would spot over the next two weeks.


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    PG#1 - 3rd cycle BFP. Team Green. HELLP syndrome @ 34 weeks.
    Later diagnosed with Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, possible link to HELLP.

    PG#2 M/C 3/14 - Surprise BFP 2/13. Beta's doubled every 52 hours from 3w5d-5w5d
    Viable pregnancy scan at 5w5d; 2nd u/s showed 2 days of growth in 7 but a HB of 120
    3rd u/s on 3/10/14 had no HB and baby had only grown 7 days over 14
    D&C 3/17/14 - complications - DX Retroflexed uterus, multiple tears to cervix

    All Welcome

    Chart

    [Deleted User]
  • When was your D&C: a week ago today How are you feeling physically: 100% fine. I still have light bleeding but it doesn't bother me. I felt fine immediately afterwards too though. I never even took the pain meds. So, that's good I guess.  How about emotionally: I had been mostly okay. I was glad to have a diagnosis and an end to be able to move forward. However, today I'm upset because I would have been 12 weeks today and probably announcing to people, but that will never happen. Also I work in a catholic school and the kids are learning about "right to life" so the classrooms have posters with pictures of babies in the womb at each month and developmental milestones for each month. So it has things like "1 month my heart started this month" and then other things for other months, but one is that the baby started dreaming. That one is hard to look at and read because I can't stop thinking of my dreams not happening. Horrible timing on the universe to have this happen right before the kids do their month long right to life lessons. I'll be seeing these posters for a month! Share some happy: spring break is coming up in two weeks
    [Deleted User]
  • tiffanymyers - hooray! Have a great date night! T&P's for good answers for you - keep us posted! 

    AggieBeth06 - ugh - I'm sorry your're having such a rough time. I have the same problem with being ready to move on, but being held back by my physical recovery. Hang in there! (DH and I just got back from a walk ourselves - gorgeous weather here today. Did you get out?)

    qanda2013 - how'd your appointment go?? Hoping you're all cleared to get back to normal!

    lav17 - welcome to the board. I'm sorry you're here. :( I cried a LOT the first few days - just let it out. I also had very little bleeding - some right as I was leaving the hospital then absolutely nothing for 3 days -then heavy cramping/bleeding for a day - then nothing again for days. From what I've seen on this board, there really is no "normal." And, I echo the other ladies - timing is crummy but totally not you fault! My D&C was 4 days before my birthday. Also crummy timing. 

    (((hugs))) to you all! Tomorrow will be a better day!!! 


    TTC since 8/13 
    BFP #1 - 1/15/14  MMC/D&C 3/6/14
    BFP #2 - 6/29/14 - on our first wedding anniversary! NMC 7/8/14
    BFP #3 - 2/11/15 - Also found out I have MTHFR deficiency - taking Foltx for more folic acid!
    BabyFruit Ticker
    [Deleted User]
  • Sorry about the format, I can't ever get the iPad to cooperate.
  • seaotter910 - glad you're feeling well physically! Sorry that you have to deal with those reminders at work all month. :( Hoping spring break comes quickly for you! 
    TTC since 8/13 
    BFP #1 - 1/15/14  MMC/D&C 3/6/14
    BFP #2 - 6/29/14 - on our first wedding anniversary! NMC 7/8/14
    BFP #3 - 2/11/15 - Also found out I have MTHFR deficiency - taking Foltx for more folic acid!
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • @seaotter910‌ - I could not imagine having those reminders right now. (((Hugs))) to you!!!

    @Asallade‌ - I didn't get to enjoy it today. I had a day of ups and downs. Maybe tomorrow will be better.


    image

    PG#1 - 3rd cycle BFP. Team Green. HELLP syndrome @ 34 weeks.
    Later diagnosed with Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, possible link to HELLP.

    PG#2 M/C 3/14 - Surprise BFP 2/13. Beta's doubled every 52 hours from 3w5d-5w5d
    Viable pregnancy scan at 5w5d; 2nd u/s showed 2 days of growth in 7 but a HB of 120
    3rd u/s on 3/10/14 had no HB and baby had only grown 7 days over 14
    D&C 3/17/14 - complications - DX Retroflexed uterus, multiple tears to cervix

    All Welcome

    Chart

  • When was your D&C:  1 week and 1 day ago

    How are you feeling physically: Fine. some light bleeding but I am past the worst of the discomfort.

    How about emotionally: It comes and goes. About twice a day I am in tears.There re times where I am still in somewhat shock and denial.

    Share some happy: I don't have to work tomorrow. I had ice cream today. It is the first day of spring so it only gets better from here.
     Daisypath Anniversary tickers        Daisypath Happy Birthday tickers

    Oct Angel*BFP 1/25/14 * EDD 10/6/14 * US#1 2/26/14 *US#2 3/3/14 no heartbeat*d&c 3/12/14*

    BFP 1/17/15 * EDD 9/30/15

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  • @lav17‌ - you haven't ruined his bday! You can't help what happened.
    100% this! don't put this on yourself on top of everything else you are feeling.
     Daisypath Anniversary tickers        Daisypath Happy Birthday tickers

    Oct Angel*BFP 1/25/14 * EDD 10/6/14 * US#1 2/26/14 *US#2 3/3/14 no heartbeat*d&c 3/12/14*

    BFP 1/17/15 * EDD 9/30/15

    image







    AggieBeth06[Deleted User]
  • ***Sorry for format, writing from an iPad.*** ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ When was your D&C: Yesterday...How are you feeling physically: Mostly fine, but had an attack of killer cramps this afternoon walking around the park with my mom and sister. So much for starting to exercise right now...How about emotionally: I'm just very sad today. I really felt good yesterday and even posted about it. Today I'm just myself again (no sweet pea inside of me) and the whole situation just makes me sad, even though I know so many women go through this and worse...Share some happy: My baby sister turns 21 on Sunday. There's about 8 years of an age difference between us so I still remember seeing her in the hospital. It's bittersweet because she'll always be the baby, but I'm so happy for her.

    Married: 9/25/10
    TTC # 1 since 5/2013
    BFP # 1: 2/7/14, mmc 3/12/14, D&C 3/19/14
    Boy, Trisomy 13, Karyotyping and Genetic Testing all normal
    Hysteroscopy and D&C 6/2/14, retained tissue
    Off the bench 7/14
    BFP # 2: 10/3/14, Blighted ovum, D&C 11/12/14
    Girl, no chromosomal abnormalities detected
    RPL Testing: Pre-diabetic, ANA+
    "I carry your heart with me (I carry it in my heart) I am never without it." - e.e. cummings

  • **ipad** When was your D&C? A week ago. How are you feeling physically? A little crampy still, light bleeding for the past 5 days (major cramps the night before the bleeding started - no bleeding the first 2 days). I am still getting tired easily. How about emotionally? It is on and off. I am fine and then something will just kind of hit me and I will find myself all teary-eyed. I have only genuinely out-right cried once in the past 2 days, though. Share some happy: I got to go out with my husband this evening, dance to our wedding song (Nat King Cole's L.O.V.E), and enjoy a glass of wine and some canapés.
    TTCAL January Siggy Challenge: Animals in the Snow

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    About Me: 

    AMA 35 :  DH 33
    BFP#1 1/26/14 (EDD: 10/7/14).  MMC 3/10/14 D&C 3/14/14
    RE Consult 11/3/14 - AMH 2.25 "great" . FSH 7.10 . Low Vitamin D
    Myomectomy 12/17/14.  Benched until March.

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    My Ovulation Chart
  • D&C was about 5 weeks ago. Physically doing well, just waiting on my period to show, but have had no signs. Emotionally doing fine as well. A week post D&C I broke down and could not control the tears at all. Get sad here and there, especially around my SIL who is newly pregnant, and just had to tell me that her baby "has a heartbeat," which mine did not. My happy: watching Dallas Buyers Club, drinking my beer!
    I became a mother because of adoption. She is the absolute love of my life. Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker formerly known as sw_in_kc
  • qanda2013 said:
    ****Weird experience warning. 

    When was your D&C: Two weeks ago yesterday. Followup is today

    How are you feeling physically: Pretty good. cramping has pretty much gone away, we will see what the DR says at 3:30. Praying all is well.

    How about emotionally: Exhausted. This might sound strange but I am terrified of forgetting my baby. I am scared that one day I will forget how much I loved that little pea. We went to the beach yesterday and I came across a stillborn sea lion (seriously, who the heck does that happen to?! What are the odds???) When I alerted the lifeguard that it was there he brushed it off and told me it was part of the food chain. I was so sad and discouraged for that poor mama sea lion. I know I took it to heart because of our miscarriage but it stole my joy for the day. 

    Share some happy: I brought my sisters home with me for four days. Their laughter is contagious, it was so much fun to have them goofing around. Also, someone shared the song Glory Baby with me last week. It is really sweet and I find myself humming it when I think of our LO. I am seriously looking forward to getting busy with my husband after this check up! I miss that! Haha!
    I know what you mean about being afraid of forgetting. I have to keep writing down all of the dates and facts because I am afraid to forget any detail. The beach story made me sad too, what a reminder. I YouTube's glory baby, tears. Glad you shared, it is nice to know there is song for us out there.
     Daisypath Anniversary tickers        Daisypath Happy Birthday tickers

    Oct Angel*BFP 1/25/14 * EDD 10/6/14 * US#1 2/26/14 *US#2 3/3/14 no heartbeat*d&c 3/12/14*

    BFP 1/17/15 * EDD 9/30/15

    image







  • When was your D&C: 12 days ago

    How are you feeling physically: normal. The cramping has subsided and I feel like my body is adjusting. Still have some light bleeding but all is well.

    How about emotionally: I feel good most days so long as I'm not speaking of this pregnancy. At my follow up appt I got a little weepy. It made it real, the hopes and dreams we had for this child are not going to be fulfilled. We will have to save those hopes for another. I guess it's hard to know what is appropriate. DH and I are in a good place, we support one another, I think what we are feeling is appropriate but I think it's ok to feel ready to move on and want to try again.

    Share some happy: We just began a bathroom renovation. Super excited to have it almost complete. Something about spring and new things feels good.


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