Dear Judgy Mom

PrimRoseMama · March 2014

I have been feeling so happy about Abby's speech therapy strides. We have small sentences! I am proud of every time she uses her words & I make sure she gets lots of praise.

I joined a Meet-Up Mom's group locally. The aim was to get out, meet new moms & Abby can play with other kids.

So, we are at the park with a group of about 5 moms. The kids range from 18 months to 4 years. Everything is going well & we are casually talking about milestones etc.

One mom asked me, "does your daughter have a disability? She seems so behind with language! All my girls are so smart & talking by 2! Is she slow?"

I was floored. I tried to keep a straight face & pleasant tone. "Oh no, no disability or cognitive delay that we know of. She is in Speech a Therapy & doing well. She *is* incredibly intelligent. She just has trouble forming words. She will get there!"

The other moms piped up that DD has such a wonderful, smart, feisty personality. No doubt she's got a lot of comprehension. It's just the expression part that is tough.

I smiled & changed the subject-- but inside I was hurt for DD. Do people think she's stupid? She's not!

(

danielledunning · March 2014

I'm livid for you and I'm sorry she is such a bitch. Your daughter is amazing and so are you.

andrea0418 · March 2014

Throat punch for the judgy bitch!

sdtchica13 · March 2014

What a fucking douchecanoe, who says that to someone, especially in front of others! She's gross and clearly overcompensating for something, and needs to start being seen and not heard! Your DD is perfect, eff her!

dinomama13 · March 2014

What an ass hat. Kick her in the vag.

Caitable25 · March 2014

Holy shit. I cannot even imagine someone saying this! That surpasses judgy into serious cunty territory. I just can't process someone asking if someone's child is "slow". Like who the fuck asks that. Serious throat punches.

KateJuly2013 · March 2014

Seriously?!?!

What a crotch. Screw her.

Aiylin · March 2014

Seriously? props to you for holding it together.

I'm not sure I could have held back from pulling a ninja stunt on her.

babyQ2013 · March 2014

I can't believe the things that people say! I'm sorry her words hurt. I hope she reflects back later and realizes it. I'm so tired of the competition. Every child is different and yours is just as great & wonderful as any other!

alimegan · March 2014

DD1 has a speech delay as well. She is very smart and independent, I can't believe people these days. I would've had to walk away to hide my tears if someone said that to my baby. Sorry you had to deal with that.

ceechie · March 2014

Guaranteed it's not her first offence and she'll be left off the email notification list soon. What an asshat.

Mommy1stTimer · March 2014

Has twat waffle been used for this one yet? What complete rudeness & ignorance.

arlingirl · March 2014

Who says that? You handled it so much better than me. Nothing is wrong with your DD.

Stina2012 · March 2014

TURDLINESS!!!!!

jackson290721 · March 2014

Welp. I would have lost my shit. I'm so sorry Prim. She is perfect.

DenverBride2005 · March 2014

I'm so sorry that happened!! You were amazingly cool and calm in the moment, I probably would have cut a bitch if she called my kid slow.

Not really, but I would have had some CHOICE words for her--I wouldn't have been able to help myself!! I'm so glad to hear that your DD's therapy is going well.

[Deleted User] · March 2014

Whoa! She needs to slow her roll on assumption making. Don't let her get you down, Abby is awesome and I don't even know her

PrimRoseMama · March 2014

Thanks y'all. :x

This lady was kind of a douche the whole time.

hollandmama · March 2014

wtf? I can't believe she did that! I am sure your DD will be speaking soon and she will be not only intelligent (a she is already) but also good expression herself.

I am sure LO will have trouble speaking too, we have 2 languages at home and one different in this country... I hope I can handle situations like this as well as you did, I will remember this and the perfect way you handled it

atlvol · March 2014

Ugh. That is so incredibly rude. I don't understand people. Your DD is amazing. Throat punch to her.

karen0477 · March 2014

Ugh, just reinforces my opinion that people are generally assholes!! Sorry you had to deal with her.....

redrocksmama · March 2014

Lucky for her, you don't travel with your J13 ladies or she would have faced our wrath! That was an untrue, tactless comment that you should ignore! I'm glad the other moms piped up in Abby's defense. Hopefully you won't see that mom at future play dates. Sorry Prim.

valstulas · March 2014

Ugh. I've been there.

At first I was too floored at the rudeness to address the comments, but eventually I started making really snarky and bitchy retorts.

You handled it perfectly, though. It sounds like you really put her in her place.

That lady is a dick and obviously speech delay =/= lack of intelligence.

And unlike those girls, Abby will grow up to be a nice person, since she has someone modeling good behavior for her.

EVA116 · March 2014

What a piece of shit! My DD was in speech therapy too and we had a lady at home depot make a comment like that. I was so fucking pissed. DH looked like he might lose it on her. We just walked away.

Good for you and taking the high road and not ripping her a new one.

And congrats on your DD for doing so well!

I am so pissed about this. WTAF is wrong with people!

bumpuser8571475 · March 2014

Wow what a bitch that woman was!! Abby is perfect I'm sure! Don't even give it anymore thought. You know your daughter better than that psycho.

opheliainwaders · March 2014

I am just absolutely floored that someone would say that to you! Ugh. You seriously held it together waay better than I would have, and I'm glad the other moms chimed in, too.

rondosa · March 2014

WHO SAYS THAT? Seriously, what kind of human being would ever say that, let alone another mom? Clearly someone with low self esteem, who feels better about themselves when they put down others. I'm very sorry, that's totally inappropriate. Your DD is perfect and don't give that mom another thought.

EagleWife · March 2014

Wow! How in the world are people so rude and insensitive?! Kudos to you for being classy about it.

Plenty of kids don't talk until after two, including one of my sisters, who has a bachelors degree in bioengineering is currently working on getting into medical school.

Carrie3102 · March 2014

What a bitch! Abby is doing wonderful!

jeng100 · March 2014

What an ignorant bitch! Who says something like that?!

fieldpetal · March 2014

This makes me so mad for you.

I get so aggravated with people who think speech delays are some sort of disability. This why parents refuse to get their children speech therapy--they don't want their kid labeled. You're doing the exact perfect thing for your daughter including joining the group.

I agree with PPs. Don't give her a second thought. Like my mom always says when dealing with rude comments: consider the source. That woman clear has some kind social disorder. So glad the other moms stuck up for your DD at least.

flkong · March 2014

What makes people think it's acceptable to say stuff like that? She would've gotten the best verbal ass wuppin. Dumasss...

giraffeluvspi · March 2014

TOOT TOOT! All aboard the J13 Cunt Punch Bus!!!

ETA: Replace BUS with TRAIN. We'll run a train on her ass (and yes, I meant that in the dirty way).

sparkymcgeee · March 2014

You handled it very gracefully. I always wonder and worry if women are judging my kids. They're just kids! They'll have enough heartache and judgement soon enough in life. Just let them be free from this crap for a few years. I hope if I'm ever in that type of situation I handle it as well as you did.

danielledunning · March 2014

The more I think about this, the more it bothers me. What if Abby did have a disability? "Is she slow?" is one of the most inappropriate things she could have said. Now that I'm a mom, it breaks my heart that people can be so inconsiderate about what another kid could be going through.

You're awesome for not losing it and I'm really glad those other moms had your back.

emandia · March 2014

WHAT! Who says that!?!?! God, I'm so sorry. I second maryannespier ---she's perfect.

flkong · March 2014

FTR Prim, my BFF's kid is 9 now and started speech therapy at 3 bc of speech aphasia. Occasionally, he studders. He's in the gifted program now and his aphasia resolved. My bff was the same way as a kid and she has dual degrees as a PA and nurse CRNA. So yeah.....

blairwitch · March 2014

I just cant imagine being able to ask someone a question like that...seriously. What is wrong with people...sorry you had to deal with that

thegoodpotato · March 2014

I would be *pissed*. I've mentioned before that M was speech delayed. Not enough that we went to therapy, but enough to worry that we weren't hitting milestones. She's coming up on three and I still have to translate for her. I'm convinced that children with speech delays only have them because they spoke a different language in a past life. The way M uses her words makes me think she's 'used' to speaking a different language with different syntax to the Germanic languages.

You shoulda clocked her.

ETA: TB is eating my paragraphs

MRads · March 2014

You handled it very well. Abby sounds like an utter delight.

I feel like people think they have carte Blanche when it comes to kids. Since B got his helmet, I have been asked if the baby is dying, if I thought a helmet would help random dude's bunny with a neurological issue and most heartbreaking a mom told her daughter not to look at the disabled baby. There's nothing wrong with our kids. Some adults have major issues though.

coco2787 · March 2014

Big kudos for staying calm. She sounds slow.

ETA: @MRads‌ don't look at the disabled baby, WTF??

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