Have date nights?
Go out with friends?
Do something by yourself?
I am trying to make a conscious effort to make these things a priority. I just don't know how realistic it is to do all three on a regular basis. ::Sigh:: There are just not enough hours in the day... I'm curious to hear about what others do and how often.
Re: How often do you...
Date nights - Once or twice a month. We're lucky that my FIL is local and regularly offers up his services. Sometimes date night is more of a double date night with friends.
Go out with friends - Once or twice a month, either on a week night for dinner (book club) or usually Sunday brunch (with different friends). For both of those, DH is in charge at home.
Do something by myself - Saturday afternoons are me time for the most part. We initially negotiated 1-5 pm, but that's flexible. Half of that used to be DD's naptime, which made it less of a grind for DH. I've had to come up with a list of places to go out of the house when I just want to sit and read, though, because if I'm home both DH and DD bug me constantly unless they happen to go out.
Friends - girls night most every week and we'll get together as couples either w/ or w/o kids every 2-3 months
Myself - Not very often. I can usually go out by myself or take a nap on the weekends when DD naps but it just depends on what we have going on.
date night--once or twice a month
friends...definitely has fallen to the bottom of the list...maybe every other month. we are also at a weird stage where we dont have a ton of friends that live in our immediate area. we are hoping with DS getting a little bigger we get involved more in town and meet some new families/couples that way.
myself--once or twice a month maybe..its usually a pedicure or yoga. I only like to go out during DS's nap time or when hes in bed. I dont like to miss time with him.
Date night: every month or every other month
Friends: I have monthly lunches with different girl friends (we all work so that's the best time); as couples, very rarely without the kids. Maybe once/quarter with our childless friends. We've found the best way to spend time with couple friends is to cook at someone's house. A lot of times we host b/c we have stricter bedtimes with our kids than our friends.
Myself: Are you asking gym/hair salon/etc? Then gym 2/week, hair every other month, and nails 1/month. Would like to find more time to shop alone (for me or the kids). Usually once/week I run an errand on lunch break.
go out with friends: too lazy to do that. I don't get any invites but I am also introverted. If I do it is monthly, when they also bring kids, too.
do something by myself: read a book at work. It is slow sometimes.
Hang with friends: without kids? Ummmm very rarely, few times a year. With kids? Me and my best friend do play dates every 3 months or so. It would be more often but she works a lot of weekends and she lives an hour away.
Something by myself: I'm assuming trips to the grocery store don't count? I do go to church by myself on Sundays. Other than that I don't get much alone time.
This is making me feel pathetic lol. DH is going to be having knee surgery soon, and will be unable to do much with the kids for a few weeks, so I don't see this improving anytime soon.
date nights - once every month or two, we've been getting a little better at this.
go out with friends - rarely. If we're going to meet up with friends it usually involves our kids and letting them tire each other out, while we sit around with a glass of wine, which I don't mind.
do something by yourself - about once a week, although it might be something simple that I do to get out of the house while DS naps on the weekend.
___________________________________________________________________________
Trying for #1 since May 2010 l DX ~ Unexplained Infertility June 2011
IUI #1&2 = BFN; IUI #3 = BFP, m/c @ 6 weeks
November '11 ~ IVF#1 ~ ER 11/18 (29R, 17F) ~ 5dt of one beautiful blast on 11/23 = BFP!!
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1st u/s 12/27 - hb of 156!! EDD 8.10.12
**TEAM GREEN!**
Sweet baby boy born 8.18.12
Trying for #2
FET #1 - October '13 - c/p l FET #2 - December '13 - cancelled
l FET #2.2 - 1.30.14 - BFN
~ More testing - hysteroscopy, endometrial biopsy & more b/w - all normal / negative~
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**TEAM GREEN!**
Beautiful baby girl born 11.24.14
Out with friends--almost every weekend with kids, once a month or so without kids
Alone time--hair appointment once every 2 months, sometimes an errand or chores on the weekend while DH does something with the kids. I also sneak a little relaxing on WFH days while kids are at daycare.
With friends: maybe once every 2 months. I want to try to be better about this. I'm going to try to purpose a regular girls' night with my group of friends.
By myself: I go to the gym or run errands during my lunch break every day, so I guess that counts. Other than that, maybe once a month.
I should preface this by saying that we are incredibly fortunate that both sets of grandparents live close by and are happy to take DS whenever we want.
Date night: every other week, and if we are not doing a date night, then we'd do a lunch date that week.
Friends: we get together every weekend with friends that have little kids so that the kids can play with each other. We rarely spend a weekend with just the 3 of us. We hang out with our friends (and BIL/SIL) without the kids every other week or so. I hang out with my girlfriends (without DH) maybe once every 3 months or so; but then again, I don't have a lot of girlfriends that live in the area. Most of my friends are "couples" friends DH and I have made or else friends from DS' DC or neighbours that have kids.
Me time: I guess every night from 8 - 10 p.m. is essentially "me" time. I go to the spa for an afternoon every few months.
Go out with friends: almost never
Do something by myself: I have Thursdays off and about twice a month I will bring dd to dc. I generally clean the house and do errands, but I'm technically by myself.
Date nights: None (single and not looking)
Out with friends: Rarely. Maybe once every 1-2 months, and DS is with me
By myself: I consider eating dinner and drinking a beer after DS has gone to bed "doing something by myself", but I might have a mom-friend watch him on a Saturday for a couple hours while I go do something else every 3 or so months.
Date nights: About twice a month, sometimes more often. By date night, I am referring to dinner with DH so not like a whole night out - usually 1-2 hours. We are lucky in that my IL live 20 minutes away and love watching DS so we usually drop him off on Friday nights so that we can have dinner alone.
Out with friends: Rarely but only because I have busy friends. If DH wants to have a beer with a friend after work or if I want to have dinner with my girlfriends, we are pretty good about covering for the other person.
By myself: At least once a week. DH and I trade off mornings on the weekends so that we each get one morning to sleep in/relax. He also likes to take DS to his parent's house on the weekend so I get alone time when he does that.
We are extremely fortunate in that my ILs are great and don't mind watching DS. If we didn't have them nearby, I don't think we would get as many date nights/alone time as we do now. And things might change when #2 comes along as well. Think we would feel bad asking my IL to watch 2 kids all the time.
With friends - it was more often before I switched jobs but back then, probably once every few months.
Myself - I get a haircut every six weeks. My DH works some nights so after the kids go to bed, I try to find a movie that he wouldn't watch with me.
As for time out with friends, I'd say 1x per month, usually. Sometimes more, sometimes less.
Anyway, I highly recommend finding an activity to do together to make the time for date nights!!
ETA: it helps that we have family nearby, and the kids' daycare center is open on Friday nights.
Date nights - Maybe once every 2 or 3 months. We try and plan those for Friday nights my parents can stay late so childcare is free and we can go out to dinner and maybe catch a movie.
Out with friends - I have a couple friends I meet for dinner every few months. Another friend has a group of girls up to her cottage (about 45 minutes from home) for an overnight in the Fall. Another friend has a few "craft days" on Saturdays a couple times a year.
Me time - I exercise at night for 20-30 minutes, usually after the kids are in bed. Also, I use my every-other Fridays off to have a few hours of 'me' time. Typically that means going to the chiropractor, getting my hair done, or running errands that are more easily done without two kids in tow. I did just go to a ladies retreat at church last Friday evening and all day on Saturday, and that was some nice 'me' time.
I feel like this is a fairly good balance, but I would like to be able to go out with DH more.
Have date nights? Probably once every 3-4 months.
Go out with friends? As in not with DS? Probably 2 times a year.
Do something by myself? If you mean anything other than an errand while DS is asleep and DH is at home with him, then never. I will probably do an errand alone during one of DS's naps on the weekend probably once every 2-3 months.
BFP #1 6/28/11 ~ EDD 3/7/12 ~ m/c 7/15/11 at 6w2d
BFP #2 8/29/11 ~ EDD 5/12/12. 4/25/12: Our take home baby is here!
BFP #3 8/27/13 ~ EDD 5/11/14. 4/27/14: Our second take home baby is here!