I love being a father and a husband. I have never wanted anything as much as these two things. Last night we took our son to his 18 month exam, and there he was, walking through the door to get to the exam room all on his own. I looked at my wife and we both realized that our little baby is not so little anymore.
Got me thinking about all those things that a single guy NEVER thinks about.
My own health: Now that I am a father, making sure that I am in the best health possible is now a responsibility that has serious consequences. Annual physicals, good diet and exercise, emotional and spiritual well being are all important things that have an impact on my family. I am not that young adult anymore who can eat anything and depend on my body to take care of itself. Now I am very aware of what I eat and drink, and maintaining a regular cycle of daily exercise.
Making a Will: I hate this idea. I have not shared this yet here, but a few weeks ago a blood clot was discovered when I went to Urgent Care for what I thought was an anxiety attack. Scared the shit out of me and my wife, of course. Now, all I am thinking about is getting a will in order this weekend. Tihs is not an event that is accompanied by cake and ballons. This is grim shit that I hate dealing with. Death is not something I am very comfortable about, in terms of my own mortality.
I knew that having a child was a huge, huge responsibility, and I love having that. At the same time, it opens up my own fears and concerns, as I look at my own life, and who I am as a father and a husband.
Any other dad's struggle with this? It seems such a long time ago when the only concerns I had were rent and where I was going to watch football. Now?? The exact opposite.