Bipolar kind of day
beachy6
member
Today was our appointment to make sure I was down reg'd enough to start Lupron tonight. Good news is that I am, but my emotions have been all over the place today.
This morning, I was so excited to be getting started again. But, on the way to our appointment (it's a 1 1/2 hour drive) my IF brain started trash talking. My road rage was out of control and I was yelling at DH. I'm sure he was second guessing making a baby with me at that very moment. Then, when we were about 30 minutes from the office, I started bawling my eyes out. The reality of this not working sunk in and, with DH still being jobless, I was second guessing spending all of that money.
Luckily, my RE is an "IF whisperer" and must have sensed my mood issues. Without me asking, he spent 10 minutes talking about why he thinks this will work and why the last one didn't. He explained how DH's sperm frag issue probably caused all of our embryos to not implant. Then, he decided (after I asked him) to put me on a low dose prednisone to help with implantation failure. Then, we paid a $hit ton of money and prayed that DH finds a job so we can replace the moolah someday. Fun times.
I felt a ton better after our appointment, but I fully expect for this cycle to be a lot of back and forth with emotions. Did any of you have this? What did you do to help? DH claimed he was ready to have me admitted to the psych ward. It was that bad.
We went to IKEA after the appointment for a little retail therapy. Yes, I realize that this contradicts my issues with DH not having a job and me freaking out about money, but it was a NEEDED therapy session. We got a new rug and now I'm all better for now 
ttc #2 since 2004 Me (35): Stage 3 Endo, DH (34): High DNA Frag
IVF/ICSI #2: April 2014: BFP!!!!!!
ET of 2 great quality embryos. + BFP on 9dp5dt. Beta #1 (10dp5dt): 257, Beta #2 (14dp5dt): 1561,
Beta #3 (21dp5d5): 8,172. Wow. It seems this is actually working. Shocked beyond belief.
1st u/s @6w5d: Baby A hb 124, Baby B hb 127 (Both measuring perfectly!)
Lost baby A. Praying that baby B stays healthy. Baby B hb 175 at 11 weeks
It's a GIRL!!!
Re: Bipolar kind of day
*******siggy/ticker warning*****
Me(31). DH (31)
DH SA normal count and motility, 1% morphology
Me .72 AMH, Fragile X premutation carrier
IVF #1 (6/12/13) BFN
IVF #2 (8/16/13) BFN
FET 10/4/13 Chemical
IVF #3 MC 5 weeks 5 days
IVF #4 DE 11/7 BFP, edd 7/28/15
All Welcome
Shopping even at the dollar store always helps!
Anovulatory cycles, increased Synthroid Diagnosed Sep 2010
1 Clomid/Ovidrel BFN May 2011
Natural cycle Aug 2011 BFP M/C 4 Weeks
1 IUI Sept 2011 BFP M/c 7 weeks
Provera Dec 2011 BFP M/C 3 Weeks
IVF March 2012 BFP m/c 4weeks 5 days (IL, Prednisone)
IVF#2w/DS July 2012 MEGA FAILURE BFN (IL, Dexamethasone)
Diagnosed No real HLA Match, DQ Beta Triad, High TNF, Low NK Cells
Oct 2012 Natural Cycle m/c 4wks (Lovenox, Prednisone)
Went to Beer Center- high tnf, low lad, implantation failure
Jan 2013 BFP
Humira,LIT,Prednisone, Lovenox, IVIG, Baby Aspirin
Miracle Born August 2013 Premature
Yours doesn't have to be a sad story
My BLOG: www.ivfbabyquest.wordpress.com -Update - old blog.
PAIF/SAIF Welcome!
Me: 42, Hubby: 35, TTC since Jan 2010. Dx: DOR due to advanced maternal age. Also: Hypothyroidism (100mcg Levothyroxin). Positive for MTHFR (hetero-C677T), Factor V Leiden, and Fragile X (on DH side). Taking pre-natal vitamins.
First natural PG 9/27/11; mc: 1/20/12
First RE visit: 8/8/12, Saline Sonogram: 8/28/12, IVF injection class: 10/11/12, add FaBB Tab for FVL, +Vitamin D.
IVF #1: 10/17/12 Baseline: FSH- 9.4, E2- 24, LH- 3.7, Prog- 0.3 The u/s showed 6 follicles in my right & 9 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ nightly. 10/21/12: Add Ganirelix SQ every morning.
ER 10/28/12: 13 Retreived. 7 Mature. 6 Fertilized. 5 Made it to PGS. ET 11/2/12: CANCELED. All 5 came back from PGS as having "severe abnormalities."
IVF #2: 1/7/13 Baseline: FSH- 8.8, 4 follicles in my right & 6 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ nightly. 1/11/13: Add Ganirelix SQ every morning. hCG Trigger 1/16/13
ER 1/18/13: 9 Retrieved. 5 Mature. 5 Fertilized. 2 Made it to PGS. ET 1/23/13: CANCELED. All embryos (he even sent the ones not growing) came back from PGS as having "multiple severe abnormalities."
IVF #3: NEW RE! 3/1/13 Baseline: FSH- 9.6, E2- 61, Prog- 0.94, 3 follicles in my right & 4 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle& 150 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/7/13: Add Ganirelix SQ in AM. hCG Trigger 3/9/13 SQ.
ER 3/11/13: 6R, 2M, 2F. Day 3: one 8 cell, grade 0. Five day ET 3/16/13: one early blast, grade Fair. 3/24/13 AF came a day before beta. BFN
IVF #4: (Added acupuncture to this cycle.) 3/25/13 WTF & Baseline: FSH-11.8, E2- 56, Prog- 0.84 3/26/13 Start stims. 3/30/13 u/s: 5 follicles in my right & 4 in my left. Rx: 225 Bravelle& 225 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/31/13 Add Ganirelix SQ in AM.hCG Trigger 4/3/13 SQ.
ER 4/5/13: 5R, 3M, 3F naturally. Day 3: two 8 cell, grade 0, one 8 cell, grade 2 (Scale 0-best to 3-worst). Five day ET 4/10/13: two blastocysts (the 3rd stopped growing.) Beta 4/18/13: 2.5 BFFN. RE recommends we stop trying and focus on living childless, due to the extremely poor quality of my eggs.
***Decided to stop trying and live CFNBC. I couldn't adjust. So, six months later...
IVF #5: Changed RE. Going to one of the big name clinics now. OWDU: 10/29/13. Update: HORRIBLE experience. Disgusted and distraught at their complete unprofessionalism and how much money and precious time they cost us. Sickening. Have now changed RE again. New Patient appt. 1/30/14.
BFP! Out of nowhere, I got KU the old fashioned way! POAS 1/26/14 - Positive! FDLM 12/30/13. Beta #1 16dpo= 373. Beta #2 18dpo= 801. EDD 10/6/14
2/4/14 1st U/S revealed a 5wk2day sac but no fetal pole. Started 200mgs of progesterone suppositories daily
2/11/14 2nd U/S revealed a perfect 6wk1day "diamond ring" embryo with a beating heart! 138bpm! Add 1mg folic acid and 40mg Lovenox
2/25/14 3rd U/S: perfect 8w1d embryo, 178bpm. 3/6 start spotting. 3/11 10w1d U/S shows no heartbeat. Scheduling D&C. The Stork has forsaken me again.
IVF #5.2: New in-state RE. Supplement priming for 1.5 cycles prior to start of cycle, including DHEA 50mg (stopped 5/15), CoQ10 200mg 2x/day, L-Arginine- 1000mg 2x/day (stopped 6/5 due to cold sore!), myo-inositol- 2g 2x/day, melatonin- 3mg, and Neevo (prenatal for MTHFR).
5/16/14 Day 2 bw cycle prior: FSH- 12.22, E2- 38.37, Prog- 1.35, LH- 9.46. 6/2/14 Day 19 bw: Prog- 23
6/12/14 Baseline: E2- 122.7, Prog- 0.4. 5 follicles in left, 4 follicles in right. Start stims: 375IU Follistim & 150IU Menopur. 6/19 Increase Follistim to 425IU, Menopur still 150IU. 6/18 add Ganirelix. 6/23 Ovidrel trigger SQ. 6/25 ER: 8R, 8M, 5F naturally. Start Medrol & Doxy. 6/26 Start Endometrin. 7/2 Start Lovenox.
7/8/14 Beta= 137.4 BFP!!! (My first from IVF!) E2- 1109, Prog- >60. Stop CoQ10, myo-inositol, and melatonin. 7/9 2nd Beta= 281.4. TSH- 2.70. Increasing Synthroid to 100mcg daily. 7/24 6w3d u/s measured 6w3d, hb: 121bmp! 8/5 8w1d u/s measured 8w3d, hb: 164bpm! Graduated from RE to OB. Now I just need to find an OB!
EDD 3/18/15!
Glad you got something nice for yourself, sometimes you just have to!!!
Me (32) DOR, elevated NK Cells/ 2 copies of MTHFR mutation/ MH (35) azoo/high DFI (TTC#1 since 2009)
IVFs#1-4: (4/10-2/12) all BFN
Surprise Bfp (9/11) - c/p
DS IUI#1-2 (9/12, 10/12) - BFN
DS IVF: (11/12) - BFN
DE/DS IVF#1: (10/13) - 2 day 3 embies transferred-BFFN
FET of 2 day 6 blasts: (12/13) - c/p
DE/DS IVF #2: (4/14) - 1 day 5 blast transferred...BFFN...again.
FET 5/14: 1 day 5 hatching blast transferred...another BFFN
Repeat SHG 6/14-normal / Endometrial Receptivity Array biopsy 7/14-Receptive Uterus
New RE, additional testing reveals elevated NK Cells
FET of 1 day 5 blast (RE recommends transferring 1 due to elevated NK cells) with lovenox, steroids & intralipids in October
TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14 ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d
DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
SAIF/PAIF Welcome
http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com
Glad you are moving forward. Retail therapy is the best.
Hysteroscopy 3/2011 2 Polyps removed 4/2011
DH on Clomid / Arimidex to address hormonal issues - Sperm found July 2011!
IVF #1 September 2011 - ER 9/8/2011- 8R, 5M - icsi - 1 made it to transfer - BFFN :-(
IVF #2 Lucky November 2011 - ER 11/25/2011 - 15 eggs!, 13 mature, 10 fertilized with isci - 7 made it to transfer! Transferred 1 - 8 cell and 2 - 7 cell. BFP!!!!
1st U/S - Twins! 2nd U/S - 3 heartbeats!!! - HOLY COW!!!
Prayers for our take home babies!
2 babies born on 3/27/12 and lost. Last baby born on 3/29/12 and lost at 20 weeks.
My angels grew wings shortly after birth.
Ahava Raisel, Matisyahu Nissim & Zev Chaim - Mommy and Daddy will always love you.
IVF #3 July 2012 - ER 7/17/2012 - 10 R. 5 F. 4 made it to ET
Transferred 2 on 7/20/2012 no snow babies :-(
Beta on 7/31/2012 = BFMFN
A miracle gift expected to come to us through adoption around 9/2012
Baby girl adopted - Birth Mother changed her mind and took the baby back
IVF #4 October 2012 - New RE. Doing PGD Testing. 8 R, 7F, 2 made it to 5 day blast for PDG testing. Both Normal (Thank you G-d!!!) 1 boy and 1 girl
transferred one beautiful 5day blast (girl)
Please G-d the almighty one - let this be our take home baby!
Beta #1 158, Beta #2 318, 1 Absolutely magnificent HB at 175! Thank you G-d!!!
Baby Girl born August 5th. Thank you G-d for our precious miracle.
AMA. PAIF & SAIF always welcome - I need all the prayers I can get!