Today was our appointment to make sure I was down reg'd enough to start Lupron tonight. Good news is that I am, but my emotions have been all over the place today.
This morning, I was so excited to be getting started again. But, on the way to our appointment (it's a 1 1/2 hour drive) my IF brain started trash talking. My road rage was out of control and I was yelling at DH. I'm sure he was second guessing making a baby with me at that very moment. Then, when we were about 30 minutes from the office, I started bawling my eyes out. The reality of this not working sunk in and, with DH still being jobless, I was second guessing spending all of that money.
Luckily, my RE is an "IF whisperer" and must have sensed my mood issues. Without me asking, he spent 10 minutes talking about why he thinks this will work and why the last one didn't. He explained how DH's sperm frag issue probably caused all of our embryos to not implant. Then, he decided (after I asked him) to put me on a low dose prednisone to help with implantation failure. Then, we paid a $hit ton of money and prayed that DH finds a job so we can replace the moolah someday. Fun times.
I felt a ton better after our appointment, but I fully expect for this cycle to be a lot of back and forth with emotions. Did any of you have this? What did you do to help? DH claimed he was ready to have me admitted to the psych ward. It was that bad.
We went to IKEA after the appointment for a little retail therapy. Yes, I realize that this contradicts my issues with DH not having a job and me freaking out about money, but it was a NEEDED therapy session. We got a new rug and now I'm all better for now
ttc #2 since 2004 Me (35): Stage 3 Endo, DH (34): High DNA Frag
IVF/ICSI #2: April 2014: BFP!!!!!!
ET of 2 great quality embryos. + BFP on 9dp5dt. Beta #1 (10dp5dt): 257, Beta #2 (14dp5dt): 1561,
Beta #3 (21dp5d5): 8,172. Wow. It seems this is actually working. Shocked beyond belief.
1st u/s @6w5d: Baby A hb 124, Baby B hb 127 (Both measuring perfectly!)
Lost baby A. Praying that baby B stays healthy. Baby B hb 175 at 11 weeks
It's a GIRL!!!