Mini vent (pg mentioned) — The Bump
Trouble TTC

Mini vent (pg mentioned)

gsanchogsancho member
Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its Photogenic
edited February 2014 in Trouble TTC
So I'm a little annoyed...although I kinda understand.  Two of my best friends from HS have been dealing with IF.  One got pregnant last year through IVF, and she is my go-to person for support and questions.  The other friend has been a good shoulder to lean on, as well.  But she has been more sensitive, so we are always keen to talk about things too much unless she seems in good spirits.  Even with all that, we text each other routinely (we live in different cities) to update on what treatment we were doing, if we got a BFN, etc.  We did our injects cycle around the same time (she was 2 wks behind me).  I told her I got a BFN, but she never told me what happened...I figured it was BFN and she didn't want to talk about it.  Kinda weird she didn't text me for a while, but between treatments, she would often take breaks to emotionally heal.

Well of course on lovely Facebook, I see today that she's expecting twin girls.  She didn't post it - it was one of her friends, posting pics of the gender reveal party.  So I can't be too annoyed b/c I know she stopped going on FB a while back b/c it was too hard for her.  Still...with all the stuff I shared with her, a text or something would have been good.  Even if she doesn't get on FB, she knows I still do and she had to figure I'd see something at some point.  Our other friend didn't know, either.  

Anyways, I know she's been emotional through the whole thing and doesn't want to go on and on about it.  And she may have not wanted to tell me initially due to my BFN, and then forgot to update me as time passed.  But like I said, I simple text does wonders!  That's all - just had to vent it out!

Me 33, DH 37 -- TTC since Jan'12 -- Low AMH (0.78) & endo, SA w/ low motility
IUI's 1-3 = BFN, IVF converted to IUI 4/13 = BFN
IVF 1.2: 8R 6M 4F -- 2 blastocysts frozen, FET 8/15 = BFP!!
Beta #s = 445;1,098; 9,545  -- EDD 5/2 -- Team Pink!
Camila Josephine arrived 4/30 :)

Re: Mini vent (pg mentioned)

  • Vent away! I'd be upset to. So sorry you had to find out that way..

    *****Siggy Warning*****

    Toby        image

    Me:28 DH:28
    TTC #1 since Nov '12
    DX: Non-IR PCOS & Hypothyroidism 
    BFP: 11/7/13 EDD: 7/18/14 Ectopic Tubal Surgery 12/18 
    2/5 HSG all clear!
    Femara 5mg + Trigger + IUI #1- 5 = BFN
    IVF #1 - 17R 15M 11F - Transferred 1 beautiful hatching blast on 9/26    4 Frosties
    Beta (10dp5dt) = 166  Beta #2 (12dp5dt) = 284  Beta #3 (14dp5dt) = 471  Beta #4 (18dp5dt) = 2032
    EDD: 6/14/15
    ~All are welcome~

    BabyFruit Ticker

  • Yikes, I'd def be a bit upset too. Maybe shoot her a text and offer your sincere congrats so she knows you know. Maybe she just wasn't sure what to say? I have a friend who has been dealing with this IF as well and we very specifically had a talk about how we'll handle when one of us finally gets the BFP: We agreed to ask the other person how their day is going to gauge if it's a good day or they just left a doctor appointment or something. We're not going to not tell each other, but we are going to make sure we tell the other person when they're not already having a bad day. 
    TTC #1 since 3/2013 / 13 cycles in
    Me: 32 / DH: 36 (Low counts, varicocele)                                       
    1/2014 - 50 mg Clomid / Ovulated before IUI could be performed = BFN 2/2014
    2/2014 - 5 mg Femara + Menopur + Ovidrel + IUI =  Blood test 14dpo confirmed BFP 3/17/14

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  • I went through something similar but with a wedding (a friend I thought I was close to told me she was getting married and that she was just having a small civil ceremony with family and going out to dinner after) then later saw beautiful, lavish pictures of the ceremony complete with bridesmaids we both went to high school with and it sorta knocked the breath out of me.  I felt deceived.

    Saw the pictures on Facebook and it really sucked.

    Sorry you found out that way :( You'd think your friend would've opened up to you sooner!

    IUI 08/2013 - natural cycle, BFN
    IUI 10/2013 - Clomid cycle, BFN
    IUI 11/2013 - Clomid cycle, BFN
    IUI 03/2014 - Clomid cycle, BFN
    IUI 05/2014 - Femara + FSH, BFN
    IUI 06/2014 - FSH, BFP! DS born 02/2015

    TTC #2 (and #3)
    W IUI 08/2017 - Femara, BFN
    W IUI 10/2017 - Femara, BFN
    W diagnosed as low AMH
    Me: PCOS
    Myo-Inositol, NAC, prenatals
    IUI 03/2018 - Gonal F - BFN

    INVOcell IVF September 2018 - BFP!!! B/G Twins born 04/2019
  • So sorry... that does suck! And to find out on FB just hurts more... I understand her not wanting to tell you right away but you were going through it all together it's hard to find out that way. You have us... keep your spirits up :)
    Married- 10/13/12
    Me- 28, DH 30
    Dx: unknown all labs WNL- waiting new Dr/insurance 01/14
    3/13- provera & 50 clomid
    5/13- provera & 100 clomid
    7/13- provera & 150 clomid--> clomid caused vision issues, Doctor is an idiot. Waiting on new insurance to see a specialist
    10/13- 1st period on my own!!!!!
    11/13- another cycle on my own!!!

  • Hugs. I am so sorry you had to find out that way.
    10/2013 - Initial consult. Started levothyroxine - tsh 2.92
    HSG- showed graying in one spot/Saline Sono- showed 5mm polyp
    DH SA -  abnormal -  36%motility on both SA's (count and morph ok on SA1, a little off SA2)
    1/10/14 - Hysteroscopy to remove 5mm polyp
    1/12/14- Medicated Cycle 1: 50mg Clomid + Ovidrel + TI = BFN
    2/15/14 - Medicated Cycle 2: 100mg Clomid + Ovidrel + TI = BFN
    3/18/14 - IUI Cycle 1: 150mg Clomid + Ovidrel + IUI = BFN
    Upped Levothyroxine to 50mg - tested at 2.62
    4/17/14 - IUI Cycle 2: 150mg Clomid + Ovidrel + IUI = BFN
    6/21/14: IUI Cycle 3: 150mg Clomid + Ovidrel + IUI

    *All are welcome*

  • I would be hurt too, sorry you had to find out that way. Hugs!

  • My heart hurts reading this.  I'm so sorry you found out that way.  I really think she should have told you -- even though sometimes people don't know how to tell friends news that might be hard, part of friendship sometimes involves being honest, even when it is uncomfortable. It was probably uncomfortable for her, but ultimately, it was very hurtful for you.  Your friend should have told you...I'm so sorry for how you found out.

  • Hugs. That's terrible.
    Me: 28 Hubs:29
    Married Since 5.18.2013
    TTC since 9.2011 w/ a short break 
    DX: Severe Hypothyroidsim-Still Testing Hubs: All Good Thus Far
    Currently Benched until Thyroid is Controlled
    Working on Weight Management While Benched
    ~All Welcome~
  • ((Hugssss)) so sorry

    DH= burn vic, abn sa MFI|| ME= PCOS, Sarcoidosis, Hypohyroidism HSG-OK
    tried naturally 2011 & 2012-
    TTC with nurse practitioner 2013
    2 clomid cycles- both bfn, started seeing RE 2013 
    MARCH-BFP (beta1;104-beta2;302)-bc of hsg
    [[all welcome !!!!!!!!!!!! ]]
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