I think stricter policies should be in place for people purchasing/adopting pets. Educational classes on how to care for them properly, mandatory checkups, surprise in home visit before purchase, income requirements and so on.
I hate an irresponsible pet owner, and I see way too many of them.
I think stricter policies should be in place for people purchasing/adopting pets. Educational classes on how to care for them properly, mandatory checkups, surprise in home visit before purchase, income requirements and so on.
I hate an irresponsible pet owner, and I see way to many of them.
I feel like these requirements should apply to taking home your baby!!! I am always surprised at how little thought people put into caring for their child.
I agree with the pet thing also. It makes me sad when people just leave their animals outside and never play with them or engage in any kind of activity. They deserve to be loved and a part of a family.
I think this is just an irl uo but. I hate seeing pot leaves on clothes and i roll my eyes when i see people wear those clothes. It looks immature and trashy.
I think stricter policies should be in place for people purchasing/adopting pets. Educational classes on how to care for them properly, mandatory checkups, surprise in home visit before purchase, income requirements and so on.
I hate an irresponsible pet owner, and I see way to many of them.
I feel like these requirements should apply to taking home your baby!!! I am always surprised at how little thought people put into caring for their child.
I agree with the pet thing also. It makes me sad when people just leave their animals outside and never play with them or engage in any kind of activity. They deserve to be loved and a part of a family.
Agree!!! Although, I don't think the baby one is a UO!
I think stricter policies should be in place for people purchasing/adopting pets. Educational classes on how to care for them properly, mandatory checkups, surprise in home visit before purchase, income requirements and so on.
I hate an irresponsible pet owner, and I see way too many of them.
Or even stricter requirements for adopting puppies. Shelters always have a ton of dogs 1 to 2 years old because people adopt a puppy because it's cute, and then surrender it 6 months later when it gets too big and "is too much to handle."
I think stricter policies should be in place for people purchasing/adopting pets. Educational classes on how to care for them properly, mandatory checkups, surprise in home visit before purchase, income requirements and so on.
I hate an irresponsible pet owner, and I see way to many of them.
I feel like these requirements should apply to taking home your baby!!! I am always surprised at how little thought people put into caring for their child.
I agree with the pet thing also. It makes me sad when people just leave their animals outside and never play with them or engage in any kind of activity. They deserve to be loved and a part of a family.
DITTO to both!!
I've always said some sort of test(s) should be required before you're allowed to conceive a baby... (IQ test anyone?!)
People that live beyond their means annoy the crap out of me. Put down the credit cards and walk away. Don't complain about how you never have any money when you spent it all on dumb, materialistic crap that is going to have little to no value to you in the near future.
"The cleaning, the scrubbing will wait til tomorrow,
For children grow up, as I've learned to my sorrow.
Ok to piggy back off @mommyames2 and @kquinonez I am definitely all for women's right to choose and reproductive rights but, if it were possible, I think you should have to take a class, atleast a week or so, before you can get your "ovaries turned on" and be able to even get pregnant.
TTC since July 2011
HSG normal in May 2012 followed by three unmonitored clomid cycles unsuccessful
Unexplained female infertility (My husband apparently has super sperm)
IUI # 1 Nov 24
BFP Dec 8! EDD Aug 17th, due to Preeclampsia and HELLP, Kylie Penelope was born July 30th!
It makes me sad when I see very small children walking to school by themselves in the mornings.
I live in a pretty big city and the crime rate isn't the greatest. Also, many of the schools I pass on my way to work are right off of the main highway - so the streets are very very busy with lots of traffic.
I know everyone's situation is different and that unfortunately not all parents can drive their children to school, but at least partner your kid up with a neighbor - some sort of buddy system so the poor kindergartener or first grader isn't walking by himself in the mornings.
FTR: my neighborhood has a walkway that connects directly to the elementary school. Even being that close I fully intend to walk Nicholas to class each morning and pick him up in the afternoons (if we're still living there in 4.5 years).
The adoption topic reminds me of something I don't like:
I don't think interracial adoptions should be allowed. I think it is doing the child a major disservice for them to be raised by someone that doesn't truly understand what the child will deal with. This relates to racism.
As an African-American there are things I deal with that, say, a Caucasian person does not. I was prepared for these things, mostly, because my mother told me of her experiences and what to look out for. What if I had been raised by someone of a different race? Would they have known what to prepare me for? I especially think about African-American males. The amount of racism and prejudice they still encounter in modern America exceeds what I deal with. Would someone of a different race have been able to prepare them for that?
And, just because I'm curious based on a study I read, has anyone heard of a black family adopting a white child??
I love sleeping alone. I don't know if this is an UO or not, but whoever decided that married couples need to sleep together in the same bed every night was an idiot. He wakes me up with his snoring, getting up to pee.. I miss sleeping by myself, uninterrupted, peace & quiet! (Pre-babies obv.)
^ I saw last night at 7 pm 3 kids getting off the public city bus in my neighborhood with there back packs, so I'm guessing first time home since school. A rough guess on there ages just based on looks would be maybe 11, 8, and 6. It seriously caught my attention.
TTC since July 2011
HSG normal in May 2012 followed by three unmonitored clomid cycles unsuccessful
Unexplained female infertility (My husband apparently has super sperm)
IUI # 1 Nov 24
BFP Dec 8! EDD Aug 17th, due to Preeclampsia and HELLP, Kylie Penelope was born July 30th!
I love sleeping alone. I don't know if this is an UO or not, but whoever decided that married couples need to sleep together in the same bed every night was an idiot. He wakes me up with his snoring, getting up to pee.. I miss sleeping by myself, uninterrupted, peace & quiet! (Pre-babies obv.)
I'm the same way. I sleep SO much better in an empty bed. I even went to the point of telling DH that there's a study that married people who sleep in separate beds have a better relationship. (I'm not sure if I really read that or if I made that up but anyways…)
The adoption topic reminds me of something I don't like:
I don't think interracial adoptions should be allowed. I think it is doing the child a major disservice for them to be raised by someone that doesn't truly understand what the child will deal with. This relates to racism.
As an African-American there are things I deal with that, say, a Caucasian person does not. I was prepared for these things, mostly, because my mother told me of her experiences and what to look out for. What if I had been raised by someone of a different race? Would they have known what to prepare me for? I especially think about African-American males. The amount of racism and prejudice they still encounter in modern America exceeds what I deal with. Would someone of a different race have been able to prepare them for that?
And, just because I'm curious based on a study I read, has anyone heard of a black family adopting a white child??
I curious about this too.
However, regarding interracial adoption I'm curious what the statistics are of the various races and how often they adopt.
I would rather allow interracial adoptions to ensure that these children are getting places in good homes versus keeping them in the system in hopes that a family of the same races adopts them.
I know of a lot of interracial adoption cases (personally and through the blogosphere) and I've seen such great family mixes. My cousin for example is Puerto Rican and adopted a black son. I follow a blog that a Midwestern white lady writes and she's adopted 5 (I think) Chinese children. I think it's all about how the adopting family helps the adoptive child accept and incorporate their own background into their new family's lifestyle.
EDIT: I think it's easy to assume that a white family may not know certain things about raising a black child (or any mixture of races, this is only an example). However, wouldn't you prefer them to be in a home where they are loved versus in the system?
I love sleeping alone. I don't know if this is an UO or not, but whoever decided that married couples need to sleep together in the same bed every night was an idiot. He wakes me up with his snoring, getting up to pee.. I miss sleeping by myself, uninterrupted, peace & quiet! (Pre-babies obv.)
I'm the same way. I sleep SO much better in an empty bed. I even went to the point of telling DH that there's a study that married people who sleep in separate beds have a better relationship. (I'm not sure if I really read that or if I made that up but anyways…)
Ha! I should totally try that. We even have a king size Tempurpedic and I still want that whole damn thing to myself.
Oh I thought of another one. I like small boobs. I don't really understand why our culture is so obsessed with getting bigger boobs. Not saying big boobs don't look good, but everyone I know who has large breasts complains about them and wishes they were smaller. And pretty much every friend I know who has small boobs wishes they had bigger ones… I don't get it. I've never wanted bigger ones.
The adoption topic reminds me of something I don't like:
I don't think interracial adoptions should be allowed. I think it is doing the child a major disservice for them to be raised by someone that doesn't truly understand what the child will deal with. This relates to racism.
As an African-American there are things I deal with that, say, a Caucasian person does not. I was prepared for these things, mostly, because my mother told me of her experiences and what to look out for. What if I had been raised by someone of a different race? Would they have known what to prepare me for? I especially think about African-American males. The amount of racism and prejudice they still encounter in modern America exceeds what I deal with. Would someone of a different race have been able to prepare them for that?
And, just because I'm curious based on a study I read, has anyone heard of a black family adopting a white child??
What if an interracial couple (black/white) has a child and the child's father (black) is no longer in the picture?
"The cleaning, the scrubbing will wait til tomorrow,
For children grow up, as I've learned to my sorrow.
The adoption topic reminds me of something I don't like:
I don't think interracial adoptions should be allowed. I think it is doing the child a major disservice for them to be raised by someone that doesn't truly understand what the child will deal with. This relates to racism.
As an African-American there are things I deal with that, say, a Caucasian person does not. I was prepared for these things, mostly, because my mother told me of her experiences and what to look out for. What if I had been raised by someone of a different race? Would they have known what to prepare me for? I especially think about African-American males. The amount of racism and prejudice they still encounter in modern America exceeds what I deal with. Would someone of a different race have been able to prepare them for that?
And, just because I'm curious based on a study I read, has anyone heard of a black family adopting a white child??
I curious about this too.
However, regarding interracial adoption I'm curious what the statistics are of the various races and how often they adopt.
I would rather allow interracial adoptions to ensure that these children are getting places in good homes versus keeping them in the system in hopes that a family of the same races adopts them.
I know of a lot of interracial adoption cases (personally and through the blogosphere) and I've seen such great family mixes. My cousin for example is Puerto Rican and adopted a black son. I follow a blog that a Midwestern white lady writes and she's adopted 5 (I think) Chinese children. I think it's all about how the adopting family helps the adoptive child accept and incorporate their own background into their new family's lifestyle.
EDIT: I think it's easy to assume that a white family may not know certain things about raising a black child (or any mixture of races, this is only an example). However, wouldn't you prefer them to be in a home where they are loved versus in the system?
It's an interesting and valid point. How can a family of a different race prepare the adopted child for his or her life? But I think sometimes the alternative is worse. My dad and stepmom adopted my younger siblings from Guatemala when they were 5, 6, and 7. There have been a few issues with racial identity, mainly because the small town they live in is mostly white. But overall, the adoption has been a great thing. The alternative would have been for them to have been split up to grow up in orphanages and the foster care system in a very poor country. (It makes me nauseated to think of that scenario, since they really are like my little brothers and sister. It would have been a terrible life. When they first came here, they had trouble with eating food. They would eat and eat and eat like there was no tomorrow, simply because they couldn't understand the concept that food was plentiful and available and they'd never have to be hungry again. It was heartbreaking.)
I don't have problems with adoptions across racial lines. Race is a huge thing and I know people of different races are treated differently but like pp has said I would rather have a kid adopted into a family that is going to love them and take care of them instead of the kid being stuck in foster care or a group home. I have a friend who has adopted kids from china and not only are the kids of a different race most if them also have some type if handicap. My friend and her husband have given these kids a much better life and no matter what obstacles the kids come across in life wether it be due to race or disability they will always know that they can come home to a family that loves them.
My LO is mixed. I am white and DH is African. DH didn't grow up in the US so he didn't grow up as a black kid in America. So LO is going to most likely experience thing in his life that neither DH nor I have gone through, should we not be allowed to have him because our lives are different?
The adoption topic reminds me of something I don't like:
I don't think interracial adoptions should be allowed. I think it is doing the child a major disservice for them to be raised by someone that doesn't truly understand what the child will deal with. This relates to racism.
As an African-American there are things I deal with that, say, a Caucasian person does not. I was prepared for these things, mostly, because my mother told me of her experiences and what to look out for. What if I had been raised by someone of a different race? Would they have known what to prepare me for? I especially think about African-American males. The amount of racism and prejudice they still encounter in modern America exceeds what I deal with. Would someone of a different race have been able to prepare them for that?
And, just because I'm curious based on a study I read, has anyone heard of a black family adopting a white child??
I curious about this too.
However, regarding interracial adoption I'm curious what the statistics are of the various races and how often they adopt.
I would rather allow interracial adoptions to ensure that these children are getting places in good homes versus keeping them in the system in hopes that a family of the same races adopts them.
I know of a lot of interracial adoption cases (personally and through the blogosphere) and I've seen such great family mixes. My cousin for example is Puerto Rican and adopted a black son. I follow a blog that a Midwestern white lady writes and she's adopted 5 (I think) Chinese children. I think it's all about how the adopting family helps the adoptive child accept and incorporate their own background into their new family's lifestyle.
EDIT: I think it's easy to assume that a white family may not know certain things about raising a black child (or any mixture of races, this is only an example). However, wouldn't you prefer them to be in a home where they are loved versus in the system?
It's an interesting and valid point. How can a family of a different race prepare the adopted child for his or her life? But I think sometimes the alternative is worse. My dad and stepmom adopted my younger siblings from Guatemala when they were 5, 6, and 7. There have been a few issues with racial identity, mainly because the small town they live in is mostly white. But overall, the adoption has been a great thing. The alternative would have been for them to have been split up to grow up in orphanages and the foster care system in a very poor country. (It makes me nauseated to think of that scenario, since they really are like my little brothers and sister. It would have been a terrible life. When they first came here, they had trouble with eating food. They would eat and eat and eat like there was no tomorrow, simply because they couldn't understand the concept that food was plentiful and available and they'd never have to be hungry again. It was heartbreaking.)
That breaks my heart!!
My cousins sons birth parents were abusive. When she adopted him (he was around 2) he was covered in cigarette butt scars/burns. Saddest thing ever.
It is my opinion that it should be someone's job to bring me and my husband coffee- a Coffee Man (or woman), if you will, every morning. I want to wake up and have them place it into my hand.
I originally posted this in the wrong thread. Where the F is the coffee?
I don't have problems with adoptions across racial lines. Race is a huge thing and I know people of different races are treated differently but like pp has said I would rather have a kid adopted into a family that is going to love them and take care of them instead of the kid being stuck in foster care or a group home. I have a friend who has adopted kids from china and not only are the kids of a different race most if them also have some type if handicap. My friend and her husband have given these kids a much better life and no matter what obstacles the kids come across in life wether it be due to race or disability they will always know that they can come home to a family that loves them.
My LO is mixed. I am white and DH is African. DH didn't grow up in the US so he didn't grow up as a black kid in America. So LO is going to most likely experience thing in his life that neither DH nor I have gone through, should we not be allowed to have him because our lives are different?
This reminds me of the blog I mentioned in my original post. All her Chinese adoptive children have some form of handicap. The majority had clubfeet but the most recent 2 have other handicaps.
Oh I thought of another one. I like small boobs. I don't really understand why our culture is so obsessed with getting bigger boobs. Not saying big boobs don't look good, but everyone I know who has large breasts complains about them and wishes they were smaller. And pretty much every friend I know who has small boobs wishes they had bigger ones… I don't get it. I've never wanted bigger ones.
Oooo I love my small boobs! Not having to worry about backaches, not fitting into clothes, strapping those things down during sports is so nice!
And about the interracial adoption thing, I think that's a very superficial way of thinking. I'm sure you are right about race identity issues but, to assume that the adoptive family hasn't prepared for this is arrogant. I had a teacher who adopted a son from Russia and they went above and beyond to teach him about his birth country, including making frequent trips to Russia. Would you have rather had him grow up in an orphanage?
And would you rather have a black child grow up in the system rather than have a stable loving family just because of his race? I also think that's reverse discrimination because if someone would have said black families can't properly care for white kids, this place would be a shit show.
I love sleeping alone. I don't know if this is an UO or not, but whoever decided that married couples need to sleep together in the same bed every night was an idiot. He wakes me up with his snoring, getting up to pee.. I miss sleeping by myself, uninterrupted, peace & quiet! (Pre-babies obv.)
I'm the same way. I sleep SO much better in an empty bed. I even went to the point of telling DH that there's a study that married people who sleep in separate beds have a better relationship. (I'm not sure if I really read that or if I made that up but anyways…)
Ha! I should totally try that. We even have a king size Tempurpedic and I still want that whole damn thing to myself.
the temperpedic has been our best purchase ever! Even though it's pricey, I don't feel him toss and turn anymore. It could be because I can fall asleep so fast now from exhaustion. I wake up when I hear him pulling on his pants in the morning though!
The adoption topic reminds me of something I don't like:
I don't think interracial adoptions should be allowed. I think it is doing the child a major disservice for them to be raised by someone that doesn't truly understand what the child will deal with. This relates to racism.
As an African-American there are things I deal with that, say, a Caucasian person does not. I was prepared for these things, mostly, because my mother told me of her experiences and what to look out for. What if I had been raised by someone of a different race? Would they have known what to prepare me for? I especially think about African-American males. The amount of racism and prejudice they still encounter in modern America exceeds what I deal with. Would someone of a different race have been able to prepare them for that?
And, just because I'm curious based on a study I read, has anyone heard of a black family adopting a white child??
I curious about this too.
However, regarding interracial adoption I'm curious what the statistics are of the various races and how often they adopt.
I would rather allow interracial adoptions to ensure that these children are getting places in good homes versus keeping them in the system in hopes that a family of the same races adopts them.
I know of a lot of interracial adoption cases (personally and through the blogosphere) and I've seen such great family mixes. My cousin for example is Puerto Rican and adopted a black son. I follow a blog that a Midwestern white lady writes and she's adopted 5 (I think) Chinese children. I think it's all about how the adopting family helps the adoptive child accept and incorporate their own background into their new family's lifestyle.
EDIT: I think it's easy to assume that a white family may not know certain things about raising a black child (or any mixture of races, this is only an example). However, wouldn't you prefer them to be in a home where they are loved versus in the system?
You bring up really good points. Interracial adoptions is definitely much better than the child staying in the system. My opinion is just based on the experiences I am familiar with. One example: I was very saddened to hear one of my friends talk about not being able to identify with her adopted family, because of racial differences. It's sad, but definitely better than the child never being adopted. This topic isn't black and white. There's a large grey area that factors into all of this.
ETA- @jamiepahel commented this literally right before me. But I'm not going to erase it because people need to know the truth about these nastttty things!
The adoption topic reminds me of something I don't like:
I don't think interracial adoptions should be allowed. I think it is doing the child a major disservice for them to be raised by someone that doesn't truly understand what the child will deal with. This relates to racism.
As an African-American there are things I deal with that, say, a Caucasian person does not. I was prepared for these things, mostly, because my mother told me of her experiences and what to look out for. What if I had been raised by someone of a different race? Would they have known what to prepare me for? I especially think about African-American males. The amount of racism and prejudice they still encounter in modern America exceeds what I deal with. Would someone of a different race have been able to prepare them for that?
And, just because I'm curious based on a study I read, has anyone heard of a black family adopting a white child??
Because white people are never exposed to racism? srsly? I know several "African-American" children who are adopted by white parents that are quite well adjusted thankyouverymuch. I'm positive they are better adjusted than they would be if they had grown up in the system.And plus also I only consider 2 of those children African American since one is from Ghana and the other is from Malawi. I don't go around saying I'm European-American.
Engaged 10/2/1202 BFP (a lil quicker than expected) 12/7/2012 Married to my best friend 12/24/2012 Beautiful baby girl arrived 8/15/2013 BFP #2 3/13/2016
The adoption topic reminds me of something I don't like:
I don't think interracial adoptions should be allowed. I think it is doing the child a major disservice for them to be raised by someone that doesn't truly understand what the child will deal with. This relates to racism.
As an African-American there are things I deal with that, say, a Caucasian person does not. I was prepared for these things, mostly, because my mother told me of her experiences and what to look out for. What if I had been raised by someone of a different race? Would they have known what to prepare me for? I especially think about African-American males. The amount of racism and prejudice they still encounter in modern America exceeds what I deal with. Would someone of a different race have been able to prepare them for that?
And, just because I'm curious based on a study I read, has anyone heard of a black family adopting a white child??
Because white people are never exposed to racism? srsly? I know several "African-American" children who are adopted by white parents that are quite well adjusted thankyouverymuch. I'm positive they are better adjusted than they would be if they had grown up in the system.And plus also I only consider 2 of those children African American since one is from Ghana and the other is from Malawi. I don't go around saying I'm European-American.
I didn't say white people are never exposed to racism. I am saying white people do not experience the exact same type of racism as a black person. Also, I'm not just talking about black and white, so please don't limit the topic to just that. Likewise, I am not saying they have to stay in the system. I know a lot of black families that foster and adopt children, so black children wouldn't be forced to stay in the system if they weren't adopted by another race.
@mommykristin88 so those kids should just stay in orphanages rather than go to a loving home? That was kind of a fucked up thing to say. My chinese sister is doing just fine in America. Sorry we did her such a disservice by giving her a chance at life. She would've died in that orphanage if white families (mine) weren't allowed to adopt her. I would love to adopt a Chinese child sometime down the road but apparently that would be a disservice to him/her.
Again, I did not say they should just stay in orphanages.
@mommykristin88 so those kids should just stay in orphanages rather than go to a loving home? That was kind of a fucked up thing to say. My chinese sister is doing just fine in America. Sorry we did her such a disservice by giving her a chance at life. She would've died in that orphanage if white families (mine) weren't allowed to adopt her. I would love to adopt a Chinese child sometime down the road but apparently that would be a disservice to him/her.
Again, I did not say they should just stay in orphanages.
@mommykristin88 so those kids should just stay in orphanages rather than go to a loving home? That was kind of a fucked up thing to say. My chinese sister is doing just fine in America. Sorry we did her such a disservice by giving her a chance at life. She would've died in that orphanage if white families (mine) weren't allowed to adopt her. I would love to adopt a Chinese child sometime down the road but apparently that would be a disservice to him/her.
Again, I did not say they should just stay in orphanages.
So what are you saying?
From my understanding she is saying the only people that should've been allowed to adopt my sister are Chinese. Eta and only black people can adopt black kids, only Indians can adopt Indian kids etc.
I understood that. I just feel like there is some back peddling, so maybe she would like to revise what she said.
@mommykristin88 so those kids should just stay in orphanages rather than go to a loving home? That was kind of a fucked up thing to say. My chinese sister is doing just fine in America. Sorry we did her such a disservice by giving her a chance at life. She would've died in that orphanage if white families (mine) weren't allowed to adopt her. I would love to adopt a Chinese child sometime down the road but apparently that would be a disservice to him/her.
Again, I did not say they should just stay in orphanages.
So what are you saying?
From my understanding she is saying the only people that should've been allowed to adopt my sister are Chinese. Eta and only black people can adopt black kids, only Indians can adopt Indian kids etc.
I understood that. I just feel like there is some back peddling, so maybe she would like to revise what she said. Edit I still need coffee
No back pedaling. I just don't understand why everyone is jumping to that the children would just stay in the orphanages? Why is it assumed that they wouldn't be adopted if a person of another race didn't adopt them?
No back pedaling. I just don't understand why everyone is jumping to that the children would just stay in the orphanages? Why is it assumed that they wouldn't be adopted if a person of another race didn't adopt them?
Because you said you didn't think biracial adoption should be allowed. In your world... everyone assumes correctly that those children wouldn't be adopted by a family of a different race.
@mommykristin88 so those kids should just stay in orphanages rather than go to a loving home? That was kind of a fucked up thing to say. My chinese sister is doing just fine in America. Sorry we did her such a disservice by giving her a chance at life. She would've died in that orphanage if white families (mine) weren't allowed to adopt her. I would love to adopt a Chinese child sometime down the road but apparently that would be a disservice to him/her.
Again, I did not say they should just stay in orphanages.
So what are you saying?
From my understanding she is saying the only people that should've been allowed to adopt my sister are Chinese. Eta and only black people can adopt black kids, only Indians can adopt Indian kids etc.
I understood that. I just feel like there is some back peddling, so maybe she would like to revise what she said. Edit I still need coffee
No back pedaling. I just don't understand why everyone is jumping to that the children would just stay in the orphanages? Why is it assumed that they wouldn't be adopted if a person of another race didn't adopt them?
Maybe because the majority of adoptive parents happen to be white.
ETA: statistical references Statistics here, and here.
No back pedaling. I just don't understand why everyone is jumping to that the children would just stay in the orphanages? Why is it assumed that they wouldn't be adopted if a person of another race didn't adopt them?
Because you said you didn't think biracial adoption should be allowed. In your world... everyone assumes correctly that those children wouldn't be adopted by a family of a different race.
I think I'm misunderstanding you.
I'm saying just because the child isn't adopted by someone of another race, it doesn't mean they won't be adopted. I feel like you all are overlooking that someone of the same race would adopt the child.
Re: UO Thursday.
My UO, I don't really like this thread because I SUCK at it. Apparently everything I think is popular. :-w
I think stricter policies should be in place for people purchasing/adopting pets. Educational classes on how to care for them properly, mandatory checkups, surprise in home visit before purchase, income requirements and so on.
I hate an irresponsible pet owner, and I see way too many of them.
I feel like these requirements should apply to taking home your baby!!! I am always surprised at how little thought people put into caring for their child.
I agree with the pet thing also. It makes me sad when people just leave their animals outside and never play with them or engage in any kind of activity. They deserve to be loved and a part of a family.
Or even stricter requirements for adopting puppies. Shelters always have a ton of dogs 1 to 2 years old because people adopt a puppy because it's cute, and then surrender it 6 months later when it gets too big and "is too much to handle."
DITTO to both!!
I've always said some sort of test(s) should be required before you're allowed to conceive a baby... (IQ test anyone?!)
People that live beyond their means annoy the crap out of me. Put down the credit cards and walk away. Don't complain about how you never have any money when you spent it all on dumb, materialistic crap that is going to have little to no value to you in the near future.
It makes me sad when I see very small children walking to school by themselves in the mornings.
I live in a pretty big city and the crime rate isn't the greatest. Also, many of the schools I pass on my way to work are right off of the main highway - so the streets are very very busy with lots of traffic.
I know everyone's situation is different and that unfortunately not all parents can drive their children to school, but at least partner your kid up with a neighbor - some sort of buddy system so the poor kindergartener or first grader isn't walking by himself in the mornings.
FTR: my neighborhood has a walkway that connects directly to the elementary school. Even being that close I fully intend to walk Nicholas to class each morning and pick him up in the afternoons (if we're still living there in 4.5 years).
The adoption topic reminds me of something I don't like:
I don't think interracial adoptions should be allowed. I think it is doing the child a major disservice for them to be raised by someone that doesn't truly understand what the child will deal with. This relates to racism.
As an African-American there are things I deal with that, say, a Caucasian person does not. I was prepared for these things, mostly, because my mother told me of her experiences and what to look out for. What if I had been raised by someone of a different race? Would they have known what to prepare me for? I especially think about African-American males. The amount of racism and prejudice they still encounter in modern America exceeds what I deal with. Would someone of a different race have been able to prepare them for that?
And, just because I'm curious based on a study I read, has anyone heard of a black family adopting a white child??
BFP 3/29/2014 2u2 Let's do this!
I curious about this too.
However, regarding interracial adoption I'm curious what the statistics are of the various races and how often they adopt.
I would rather allow interracial adoptions to ensure that these children are getting places in good homes versus keeping them in the system in hopes that a family of the same races adopts them.
I know of a lot of interracial adoption cases (personally and through the blogosphere) and I've seen such great family mixes. My cousin for example is Puerto Rican and adopted a black son. I follow a blog that a Midwestern white lady writes and she's adopted 5 (I think) Chinese children. I think it's all about how the adopting family helps the adoptive child accept and incorporate their own background into their new family's lifestyle.
EDIT: I think it's easy to assume that a white family may not know certain things about raising a black child (or any mixture of races, this is only an example). However, wouldn't you prefer them to be in a home where they are loved versus in the system?
Ha! I should totally try that. We even have a king size Tempurpedic and I still want that whole damn thing to myself.
What if an interracial couple (black/white) has a child and the child's father (black) is no longer in the picture?
My LO is mixed. I am white and DH is African. DH didn't grow up in the US so he didn't grow up as a black kid in America. So LO is going to most likely experience thing in his life that neither DH nor I have gone through, should we not be allowed to have him because our lives are different?
That breaks my heart!!
My cousins sons birth parents were abusive. When she adopted him (he was around 2) he was covered in cigarette butt scars/burns. Saddest thing ever.
I originally posted this in the wrong thread. Where the F is the coffee?
This reminds me of the blog I mentioned in my original post. All her Chinese adoptive children have some form of handicap. The majority had clubfeet but the most recent 2 have other handicaps.
https://nihaoyall.com/
And about the interracial adoption thing, I think that's a very superficial way of thinking. I'm sure you are right about race identity issues but, to assume that the adoptive family hasn't prepared for this is arrogant. I had a teacher who adopted a son from Russia and they went above and beyond to teach him about his birth country, including making frequent trips to Russia. Would you have rather had him grow up in an orphanage?
And would you rather have a black child grow up in the system rather than have a stable loving family just because of his race? I also think that's reverse discrimination because if someone would have said black families can't properly care for white kids, this place would be a shit show.
Baby C - 08.23.13
You bring up really good points. Interracial adoptions is definitely much better than the child staying in the system. My opinion is just based on the experiences I am familiar with. One example: I was very saddened to hear one of my friends talk about not being able to identify with her adopted family, because of racial differences. It's sad, but definitely better than the child never being adopted. This topic isn't black and white. There's a large grey area that factors into all of this.
BFP 3/29/2014 2u2 Let's do this!
Engaged 10/2/1202
BFP (a lil quicker than expected) 12/7/2012
Married to my best friend 12/24/2012
Beautiful baby girl arrived 8/15/2013
BFP #2 3/13/2016
BFP 3/29/2014 2u2 Let's do this!
BFP 3/29/2014 2u2 Let's do this!
So what are you saying?
Eta and only black people can adopt black kids, only Indians can adopt Indian kids etc.
I understood that. I just feel like there is some back peddling, so maybe she would like to revise what she said.
Edit I still need coffee
No back pedaling. I just don't understand why everyone is jumping to that the children would just stay in the orphanages? Why is it assumed that they wouldn't be adopted if a person of another race didn't adopt them?
BFP 3/29/2014 2u2 Let's do this!
ETA: statistical references
Statistics here, and here.
I think I'm misunderstanding you.
I'm saying just because the child isn't adopted by someone of another race, it doesn't mean they won't be adopted. I feel like you all are overlooking that someone of the same race would adopt the child.
BFP 3/29/2014 2u2 Let's do this!