Will you have me back? :-(

JCM285 · February 2014

Hi everyone, I haven't been in this forum for a while, but unfortunately I belong back here. I just miscarried today and this is my second miscarriage. I thought it would get easier if I had to deal with this ever again, but that is so untrue. I am finding that I am much more discouraged the second time around and am really starting to lose hope in having a successful pregnancy. My first pregnancy was in February 2013 and it ended in March due to a partial molar pregnancy. We got clearance from the doctor this January to TTC again and got pregnant right away. I found out on the 7th about my pregnancy, but since this morning, I have been bleeding nonstop and passing some clots. I know that it's over, but it's so hard, because I didn't even make it to my first appointment, which was scheduled for Monday. Now I have to go to the doctor in the morning and I already know what he is going to say, because I have been through this before. I think the saddest part of all is that I'm not even mildly interested in trying again after this one. It took a while for me and DH to muster up the courage to actually TTC after the first miscarriage, but at least we were interested back then. Right now, I'm so angry and hurt that I don't have any interest in it at all. I honestly feel like I HATE my body. I think this time around, I am going to give in and go to a therapist. I almost did it last year and I should have. It was a mistake not to. I am really in a rut...

JCM285 · February 2014

Sorry girls, changing my siggy right now!

Unknown · February 2014

This content has been removed.

Maxsmommy123112 · February 2014

So sorry for your losses. My situation is very similar. I too wish I had seen a therapist last time around. I feel like now that I've miscarried again it's brought up a lot if unresolved issues. We will definitely be seeing a therapist this time. I'm right there with you.

As for TTC again, I think during the MC process and shortly after it's normal to feel scared and not want to TTC again. Some days I want to. Some days I don't. I am just taking it day by day as far as that goes. DH wants to try again.

Either way I want answers. I am going in for testing in a month and somehow that has helped distract me from TTC. One step at a time. I want to know why this happened again and if it's even possible to prevent it. Are you going to persue any testing?

My T&Ps are with you during the rough days ahead. Hopefully you can find support here.

JCM285 · February 2014

Thank you ladies. @Birch113, yes I actually called one person. I went on the Psychology Today website and looked up the psychologists in my area. One had infertility and trauma as her specializations. Even though infertility isn't exactly pregnancy loss, I feel as though she might be qualified to help me with the losses too. She returned my call and left a message and I could kick myself now for not calling her again, but I guess I wasn't ready. I definitely feel ready to talk to someone now. @Maxsmommy123112, I would love to get testing done, but I don't know what the doctor is going to say tomorrow. I might not need a D&C, because I miscarried extremely early this time. I am just reallllly hoping and praying I don't need the procedure done, because I did not have a good experience! Maybe in time I will ask about the testing though. Thanks for the suggestion. I hope that the therapy also works out for you! I have had therapy for anxiety when I was younger and it definitely helped me get through some tough times.

jesswein9 · February 2014

So sorry you find yourself here again. Like yourself and some other ladies here, this is my second pregnancy loss also. Each time is just as hard if not harder. I'm glad you were able to make an appointment to see a therapist, hopefully that will help with the healing process. Be kind to yourself and take things one day at a time.

dawnstar898 · February 2014

So sorry for your loss

Tess0307 · February 2014

So sorry that you are here again! ((HUGS))

I too go back and forth between TTC right away or not. It's so hard sometimes!

JCM285 · February 2014

Thank you everyone. The first day was VERy hard in myself and DH, but we are starting to pick ourselves off and dust ourselves off now. I'm going for my consultation with that therapist on Thursday so I am looking forward to see what kind of help she can offer me.

Maxsmommy123112 · February 2014

Good for you. I didn't go to therapy after our first loss and have realized that was a big mistake. There were a lot of unresolved issues that should've been addressed. It's good that you have recognized that now so that you both can move forward in a healthy way. We will also be going to counseling soon. GL to you!

Want a personalized experience?

Will you have me back? :-(

Re: Will you have me back? :-(

Choose Another Board

Search Boards