Unpopular Opinion Thursday!

sxymamakat · February 2014

My UO is that I hate the use of excessive "text-speak" abbreviations when things are typed in any format except for text messages on a cell phone. The little veins on my forehead stick out when someone on a board uses things like "n" instead of "and"- it's two more letters, and makes you look lazy, incompetent, and borderline stupid. I don't even mind acronyms like LOL since it makes a clear point about an emotion, but shortening just to skip typing is idiotic. My students (college upperclassmen!) will submit papers using text-speak and other acronyms, so that's likely where my frustration comes from, but it makes me see red.

lindslalala · February 2014

BW1088 said:

Maybe I'm overly-sensitive, but my UO would be about those mamas who choose to stay at home with the kiddos and then constantly complain about how bored they are. :-< Financially, it's not possible for me to quit working, though I desperately (so bad it hurts) want to be at home full-time.

I figure, if you're not happy staying at home all the time, consider a hobby or part-time job maybe? There's no shame in going back to work if being a SAHM isn't the right fit for you, but it's kind of rude to whine about being bored/stuck-in-the-house-with-these-crazy-kids to someone who would give almost anything to trade places with you. I understand once in a while you need to vent, but over and over is too much.

Maybe I just have rude "friends"? :-?

I need to meet these bored SAHMs so they can teach me their ways. I've been a SAHM for nearly 2 years and have yet to be bored. I'm clearly doing this wrong.

MonkeyJD · February 2014

JP27 said:

jensavicci said:

This is such a lame UO but, I hate the song "here comes the bride". It's so....non-romantic or original at all. In fact, all it does is very plainly state that the bride is coming all dressed in white. I also very much dislike when the couple sees each other before the ceremony begins. It's not because of bad luck or whatever but because I like the idea of seeing the bride for the first time right when she approaches the aisle.

Me too! I walked down to an instrumental version of an Eric Clapton song. My MIL really was campaigning for Canon in D but after being in orchestra my whole life and playing that song a million times hearing it makes me want to bang my head against the wall. Objectively, it's beautiful but I just can't.

I don't have a UO, I just wanted to say that I walked down the aisle to "She" by Elvis Costello.

BW1088 · February 2014

lindslalala said:

I need to meet these bored SAHMs so they can teach me their ways. I've been a SAHM for nearly 2 years and have yet to be bored. I'm clearly doing this wrong.

--- Quote Fail ---

If I could route their Facebook posts to you, you'd probably want to scream. 8-| It's constantly "Well, my house is clean, dinner is in the crockpot, the kids are napping, and I've just finished my nails. I'm bored SILLY!!" I want to cry and then kick them in the shins. ~X(

ETA: can't fix the quote box

[Deleted User] · February 2014

The user and all related content has been deleted.

lindslalala · February 2014

BW1088 said:

lindslalala said:

I need to meet these bored SAHMs so they can teach me their ways. I've been a SAHM for nearly 2 years and have yet to be bored. I'm clearly doing this wrong.

--- Quote Fail ---

If I could route their Facebook posts to you, you'd probably want to scream. 8-| It's constantly "Well, my house is clean, dinner is in the crockpot, the kids are napping, and I've just finished my nails. I'm bored SILLY!!" I want to cry and then kick them in the shins. ~X(

ETA: can't fix the quote box

Oh yes that does make me want to scream. Please know that not all of us are that obnoxious!

BW1088 · February 2014

lindslalala said:

Oh yes that does make me want to scream. Please know that not all of us are that obnoxious!

Much appreciated!!

If I ever get the chance to stay home, I'm determined to thoroughly enjoy it. :x

Salsera29 · February 2014

jojobean86 said:

I'd will do absolutely anything to stay home with my children. I'd give up cable, internet, car, shopping, etc. before I ever went back to work. On the contrary, I don't give a shit about breastfeeding, natural child birth, feeding my children organic nutritious food, etc. Is my "good mom" badge all balanced out now?

We're all just doing the best we can. I hate when I see moms judging other moms when it comes to their parenting. Staying home is just something that is important to me - that I value. I don't hold other moms to ideals I have for MYSELF.

I agree with this. We probably could *manage* for me to stay home, but we are not willing to make the major lifestyle changes it would require. Like, we want to raise our kids in a house, not our apartment. So, no SAH for me. It's what we believe is best for our family.

I guess my UO is that the SAHM comment (can't remember the name to tag) ) didn't bother me.

BW1088 · February 2014

jessa8907 said:

I don't think it's any worse for a SAHM to complain on a bad day than a working mom to complain about their job on a bad day.

I love my job, my office, my coworkers. That doesn't mean I enjoy every single day at work. I'd assume it would be the same for SAHM whether they CHOOSE to SAH or not.

True... good way to look at it.

zellatrix · February 2014

gwennie357 said:

Regarding the c-section conversation: for myself personally, and only for myself, I hope to be able to have a drug-free vaginal birth. If it doesn't work out that way, so be it. But I really don't understand the recent upswing in c-section-shaming. For lots of you, it's been completely beyond your control, prompted by medical reasons, or simply what you chose was best for you and your baby. Everyone has a birth story, and I don't think anyone should be made to feel ashamed of theirs.

However, I'm genuinely curious as to WHY women want elective, scheduled c-sections? I believe it's every woman's choice, but I'm not sure I get it. Is it about convenience? I'm guessing no, so what are the other reasons/benefits? (This doesn't apply to those who've had a medically necessary c-section, btw.) Is it just a myth that women on my side of the argument perpetuate? I've heard stories of women scheduling a c-section so the child would have a particular birthday -- does that actually happen? I feel the same about non-medically necessary inducements -- I just don't get it.

I don't believe I have seen any c-section shaming, especially here. When I was pregnant with my first I was part of a forum that was extremely "crunchy". It was all babywearing, breastfeeding, homebirthing, co-sleeping, attachment parenting or you suck. This board is a breath of fresh air compared. I posted a month ago about being scared of having a RCS and was reassured quite a bit that it would likely not be as bad as I am setting myself up for it to be.

I can't say I understand wanting a c-section as a FTM without a medical necessity, but I know some who do it and I will completely respect another mothers choices as her own. (well... to an extent, I know one in real life that gave her kids soda in a bottle... and other stellar choices, but whatever. I still didn't shame her. Just bitched behind her back)

bchildrn · February 2014

@zarkarella your post made me cry. Working in anesthesia, it makes me so happy to see posts where we made a difference. Especially because most times our patients don't remember us =]]

lindslalala · February 2014

jessa8907 said:
I don't think it's any worse for a SAHM to complain on a bad day than a working mom to complain about their job on a bad day.

I love my job, my office, my coworkers. That doesn't mean I enjoy every single day at work. I'd assume it would be the same for SAHM whether they CHOOSE to SAH or not.

I agree with you to a point. However, whenever I complain to friends/family/DH I feel guilty about it...like I'm complaining about DS, you know? People seem to have less sympathy for that than regular work gripes.

Jbosarge85 · February 2014

LiteraChick said:
I feel like text speak is going to evolve English into some nonsensical language that the rest of the world will laugh at us for. #WebstersDic4lyfeYo

I believe it's actually Korea that I heard now has rehab for smart phone users. They say that using the smart phone as excessively as the population uses it (or other phones similar) is actually making people stupid. They are unable to write intelligible sentences and hold face to face conversations.

Stacigirl413 · February 2014

I think the word "squooze" should be a word. I.E. Freeze= froze squeeze= sqooze LMAO
Btw I know I sound completely dumb but I just have always felt this way LMAO

iris427 · February 2014

I SAH because right now, it makes more sense for us financially. I think it's boring as fuck though. Some people like it, some people don't, just like anything else in life.

Jbosarge85 · February 2014

My UO I feel guilty anytime I spend money on myself. This Christmas I got maternity jeans they were on sale from $60 to $18 and had to get them three sizes too big to get the cheaper price but didn't want to spend too much. Before that I honestly cannot remember the last time I bought clothes, I think it was 2007. Today is my birthday and we went out for breakfast and dinner and I cried when we got home for spending so much, we're also moving across country in a couple months so I'm afraid we took too much from our savings and spent it on me.

jensavicci · February 2014

I hate that people have started to use the word "ratchet" in the same context as "tacky". In other words, it's become slang. No god dammit. She is not "ratchet". Why? Because....

ratch·et
ˈraCHit/
noun
1.
a device consisting of a bar or wheel with a set of angled teeth in which a pawl, cog, or tooth engages, allowing motion in one direction only.

Eener31 · February 2014

Here's my unpopular opinion: I hate when people ask for help naming their kid. Seriously, how am I supposed to know what kind of name you'll like? It's so personal.

chevronseven · February 2014

Are you saying that about me, or about the people who got mad at me at work? Because obviously I don't think there is one correct parenting technique for everyone, I don't know what about my post suggested that I do. Just my opinion, thought that was the point of this board.

DeannaGL · February 2014

BPaws said:
@gwennie357
I can give you my personal reasons for choosing a RCS. I was offered the choice of a VBAC or RCS, and chose RCS happily. These are mine alone and come to me after quite a lot of thought and some therapy.

My first birth experience was hell. Hell. Aside from the length and my unwavering desire for a "natural birth" (a term I loathe BTW, all birth is natural) the eventual emergency csection was the single most terrifying, confusing experience of my life. The trauma and shock of our first csection that left me with so many unresolved feelings; guilt, fear, failure, self doubt, extreme sadness.... It was months before I could think about it at all without breaking down into tears.

For me, a RCS is the chance to go into a terrifying situation with some control and clarity. I will know what is happening, I will know what my body is doing and why. More importantly, I will know what the doctors are doing and why. I will be educated and informed. An RCS is a chance for me to go into a bone chillingly scary situation with a timeline and an concrete idea of what is happening. It is a complete 180 from our first experience and I am embracing the chance for a redeeming birth experience. Emotionally, it is the best choice for our family.

Yes- our first csection was medically necessary. Is a RCS necessary? Maybe, but maybe not. I would be lying if I said I wasn't excited to know exactly when my child is coming and you bet your ass I'm going in there with full makeup and my hair did. It's also ridiculously convenient to be able to know when we need to find care for DS.

Ditto everything you said. I'm way to scared to consider going through and putting my unborn child through what we went through the first time. I was thrilled when my doc didn't offer VBAC as an option for all of the reasons you mentioned. I sometimes get the guilt for not wanting it, but then the fear wins out again.

helloblueeyes · February 2014

jensavicci said:

I hate that people have started to use the word "ratchet" in the same context as "tacky". In other words, it's become slang. No god dammit. She is not "ratchet". Why? Because.... ratch·et ˈraCHit/ noun 1. a device consisting of a bar or wheel with a set of angled teeth in which a pawl, cog, or tooth engages, allowing motion in one direction only.

I have spent a fair amount of time trying to figure out what/how/why "ratchet" came to mean something other then the definition you posted.

I gave up and assumed i was just too old too understand kids and their hip lingo. To be fair i'm not sure i understood that shit when i was going through it.

cuntasaurusrex · February 2014

helloblueeyes said:

jensavicci said:

I hate that people have started to use the word "ratchet" in the same context as "tacky". In other words, it's become slang. No god dammit. She is not "ratchet". Why? Because.... ratch·et ˈraCHit/ noun 1. a device consisting of a bar or wheel with a set of angled teeth in which a pawl, cog, or tooth engages, allowing motion in one direction only.

I have spent a fair amount of time trying to figure out what/how/why "ratchet" came to mean something other then the definition you posted.

I gave up and assumed i was just too old too understand kids and their hip lingo. To be fair i'm not sure i understood that shit when i was going through it.

They've got to mean wretched, no?

Ylvelill · February 2014

livelaughlove88 said:
This is my first time posting on this thread, but I definitely have an unpopular opinion! I know that it is in kids' nature to ask "why," but I believe that when it comes to a parent telling them to do something, the only answer they need is "Because I said so." That's how I was raised, you just do what you're told and it doesn't matter why! When I got a little older my mom would start entertaining my curiosity more, but as a child it was (and is) a safety issue. If your kid is about to run in front of a car and you say "Stop!" you don't have time to explain why. They need to just be taught to do it because you said to. Plus it's a "respect your elders" thing in my mind. I think it should be the same for teachers, since they are recognized authority figures in a child's life (of course teach your child basic right from wrong so they know when they're being asked to do something wrong and can refuse), but I am a teacher and actually got in trouble for feeling that way.

Wow I could not disagree more

iris427 · February 2014

aliletz said:

helloblueeyes said:

jensavicci said:

I hate that people have started to use the word "ratchet" in the same context as "tacky". In other words, it's become slang. No god dammit. She is not "ratchet". Why? Because.... ratch·et ˈraCHit/ noun 1. a device consisting of a bar or wheel with a set of angled teeth in which a pawl, cog, or tooth engages, allowing motion in one direction only.

I have spent a fair amount of time trying to figure out what/how/why "ratchet" came to mean something other then the definition you posted.

I gave up and assumed i was just too old too understand kids and their hip lingo. To be fair i'm not sure i understood that shit when i was going through it.

They've got to mean wretched, no?

Urban Dictionary (a very scholarly source I'm sure) tells me that it does indeed come from the word wretched.

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Ratchet&page=3

oscarwao · February 2014

aliletz said:

helloblueeyes said:

jensavicci said:

I hate that people have started to use the word "ratchet" in the same context as "tacky". In other words, it's become slang. No god dammit. She is not "ratchet". Why? Because.... ratch·et ˈraCHit/ noun 1. a device consisting of a bar or wheel with a set of angled teeth in which a pawl, cog, or tooth engages, allowing motion in one direction only.

I have spent a fair amount of time trying to figure out what/how/why "ratchet" came to mean something other then the definition you posted.

I gave up and assumed i was just too old too understand kids and their hip lingo. To be fair i'm not sure i understood that shit when i was going through it.

They've got to mean wretched, no?

Urban Dictionary (a very scholarly source I'm sure) tells me that it does indeed come from the word wretched.

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Ratchet&page=3

Lurking from May but my coworkers and I were just talking about this at work today, and we stumbled upon this: https://latinrapper.com/blogs/?p=8810

ghostof5letters · February 2014

zarkarella said:

gwennie357 said:

Regarding the c-section conversation: for myself personally, and only for myself, I hope to be able to have a drug-free vaginal birth. If it doesn't work out that way, so be it. But I really don't understand the recent upswing in c-section-shaming. For lots of you, it's been completely beyond your control, prompted by medical reasons, or simply what you chose was best for you and your baby. Everyone has a birth story, and I don't think anyone should be made to feel ashamed of theirs.

However, I'm genuinely curious as to WHY women want elective, scheduled c-sections? I believe it's every woman's choice, but I'm not sure I get it. Is it about convenience? I'm guessing no, so what are the other reasons/benefits? (This doesn't apply to those who've had a medically necessary c-section, btw.) Is it just a myth that women on my side of the argument perpetuate? I've heard stories of women scheduling a c-section so the child would have a particular birthday -- does that actually happen? I feel the same about non-medically necessary inducements -- I just don't get it.

I don't believe I have seen any c-section shaming, especially here. When I was pregnant with my first I was part of a forum that was extremely "crunchy". It was all babywearing, breastfeeding, homebirthing, co-sleeping, attachment parenting or you suck. This board is a breath of fresh air compared. I posted a month ago about being scared of having a RCS and was reassured quite a bit that it would likely not be as bad as I am setting myself up for it to be.

I can't say I understand wanting a c-section as a FTM without a medical necessity, but I know some who do it and I will completely respect another mothers choices as her own. (well... to an extent, I know one in real life that gave her kids soda in a bottle... and other stellar choices, but whatever. I still didn't shame her. Just bitched behind her back)

STUCK IN GREY

I absolutely wanted a c-section as a FTM and jumped at the opportunity to get one. To me, the scheduling was extremely appealing. Not for a specific date, but just for life in general. I could tell work immediately when I needed off, I could work up until the day before my c-section. I could plan for who was going to watch my dog, and take care of my home. I'm in sales, and my calendar is booked out a month in advance. Planning a scheduled c-section allowed me to keep my clients and coworkers informed of what our schedules would look like. This is important to me. I don't have a normal job where someone is just covering for me. There are lots of moving parts involved. I liked having the ability to keep everyone informed and in order during my absence.

Also, I had absolutely no desire to give birth. None. Not a single, primal or maternal desire at all. I really don't see any need for it when surgery is an option. There is not a single thing that sounds appealing to me when it comes to giving birth. It sounds like a physical and mental endurance event that, thanks to modern medicine, is completely unnecessary in the overall scheme of things. To me, this would be like getting my wisdom teeth removed with novocain vs. general anesthesia. If I have the option to experience less discomfort, I'm all for it. I really don't see it any different than any other routine surgery.

No forceps, no tearing, no epesiotomy (sp?), no hours of pushing, no back labor, no stuck in birth canal, no emergency c/s, no exhaustion.

Honestly, I can't really understand why people would want to experience any of that when we now have options.

There is totally an overall air of judginess and c-section shaming now a days that is just uncalled for. Women should be able to choose how they give birth to their children. Whatever their motivations. What does it matter to anyone else?

ghostof5letters · February 2014

God bless women who can mentally handle staying home with their children, and/or watch other people's kids. Holy smokes, you're superstars.

acciovino · February 2014

ghostof5letters said:

God bless women who can mentally handle staying home with their children, and/or watch other people's kids. Holy smokes, you're superstars.

NO kidding. I SAH with DD for 5 months and had to get on medication AND go back to work. I'm not mentally cut out for it. It also could have been that I had severe PPA, but I was so happy to go back to work.

mrscutforth · February 2014

I'll commit about the RCS.
LO was an emergency c/s. When the nurses told me after being monitored for about 45 min, I looked at them and said no. They told me I didn't have a choice because LO apparently had been trying for a couple of days to come out and my body wasn't in labor telling me that. He was running on the last of his blood sugars to stay alive. Having that c/s saved my baby's life. Something in me told me to go to L&D. With LO2 I asked if it was possible to have a VBAC and she said yes. But because I am paranoid about what happened the first time around I asked for a RCS. OB is understanding and fine with my decision about having a RCS. I will be closely monitored and baby will be taken when are ready to avoid any complications. Plus it works out for me to having a RCS for me to get my tubes tied while they are in there.

singingirl96 · February 2014

ghostof5letters said:

There has been much eye-roll enduring ass kissing here this week. Same goes with compliment fishing.
I think it's been pretty boring lately. But I've been on vacation this week so I've been here way too much.
Oh, it's been boring

I can't figure you girls out... I tried to spice things up, and got roasted.... I guess I'll stick to lurking for a while

[Deleted User] · February 2014

The user and all related content has been deleted.

Ylvelill · February 2014

ghostof5letters said:
God bless women who can mentally handle staying home with their children, and/or watch other people's kids. Holy smokes, you're superstars.

That's okay I would go nuts working in an office all day, give me diapers or give me death!

AMcLaws · February 2014

aliletz said:

AMcLaws said:

A pregnant friend of mine was killed by someone who was high on marijuana and chose to drive. As a result, I side-eye anyone who uses it for recreational purposes (including my own brother!)

I'm sorry for your loss. I'd probably have a hard time with seeing others use it too.

Thank you. Fortunately, they were able to save her sweet baby. But he'll never know the amazing person his mother was. All we can do is tell stories and share pictures so he has an idea

drunkenhandstand · February 2014

ghostof5letters said:

jensavicci said:

Alright, last one before I hit the road. I hate Scandal, Law and order, CSI, and all other murder mystery, political and investigative TV shows. They're all snooze fests for me.

I hate Law & Order SVU and I think it's insanely creepy that people find entertainment in watching shows based on rape and murder of women and children. I think it speaks volumes about our society in general that it's been a top rated show for over a decade.

Oh man! This makes me so sad! I LURVE murder mystery, political, investigative, etc. Scandal is my TV heaven right now! And these words coming from two of my favorite girls too! My heart just broke a little.

Kabee4 · February 2014

kimberlykl2009 said:

iris427 said:

aliletz said:

helloblueeyes said:

jensavicci said:

I hate that people have started to use the word "ratchet" in the same context as "tacky". In other words, it's become slang. No god dammit. She is not "ratchet". Why? Because....

ratch·et
ˈraCHit/
noun
1.
a device consisting of a bar or wheel with a set of angled teeth in which a pawl, cog, or tooth engages, allowing motion in one direction only.

I have spent a fair amount of time trying to figure out what/how/why "ratchet" came to mean something other then the definition you posted.

I gave up and assumed i was just too old too understand kids and their hip lingo. To be fair i'm not sure i understood that shit when i was going through it.

They've got to mean wretched, no?

Urban Dictionary (a very scholarly source I'm sure) tells me that it does indeed come from the word wretched.

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Ratchet&page=3

Lurking from May but my coworkers and I were just talking about this at work today, and we stumbled upon this:

https://latinrapper.com/blogs/?p=8810

It was my understanding that "ratchet" was used in place of "ghetto" not "tacky". This is according to the 17 year old using it that I questioned. I think it's silly either way.

Ecomom17 · February 2014

beff12 said:

I will hardcore judge you if you leave a public restroom without washing your hands. Do what you want to at your own house, but in a restaurant...gross! Take 20 seconds and rinse them off.

Wait, that's an UO? Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew!!!!!!! Why do people do this? So disgusting. Also, just rinsing actually encourages bacterial growth, especially after you touch dirty surfaces (like...the door handle) with wet hands. Use SOAP and dry them off!

Ecomom17 · February 2014

Jbosarge85 said:

I think huge germaphobes are a bit ridiculous. We have a friend who has disinfectant spray that she sprays her family down with whenever they are in public before they get in their car. I think that's why they are always sick. Don't get me wrong, I think washing your hands is smart, and I wipe down the cart handle before I touch it (because other people DON'T wash their hands). I still think the spray is a bit extreme. It's ironic because that same friend doesn't believe in vaccinating.

Gah! Quote box hell!
Anyway, that doesn't seem ironic to me: she's paranoid about germs b/c she doesn't vaccinate her kids so she knows they can catch something deadly from any surface. I bet that does have something to do with their always being sick, though (aside from not vaccinating), since using super-strong soaps and stuff helps to breed stronger bacteria and viruses. Anyway, I totally agree, being overly germaphobic isn't actually helpful.

Ecomom17 · February 2014

jensavicci said:

jensavicci said:

This is such a lame UO but, I hate the song "here comes the bride". It's so....non-romantic or original at all. In fact, all it does is very plainly state that the bride is coming all dressed in white. I also very much dislike when the couple sees each other before the ceremony begins. It's not because of bad luck or whatever but because I like the idea of seeing the bride for the first time right when she approaches the aisle.

The woes of a wedding planner?

It's definitely not my favorite song either. I was much happier with my music choices (not to mention the Catholic Church doesn't allow you to use "Here Comes the Bride").
------------------ Yes. I must do as they ultimately wish haha but a few suggestions never hurts!

Haha, perhaps not such an UO, jen! I walked down to Handel's Water Music. I agree, HCTB is pretty uninspired.

Wow, you must have some fun wedding stories!

Ecomom17 · February 2014

BPaws said:

I hate when people say douchey things like "I like being able to hold my baby immediately instead of waiting". I give them a giant middle finger in my head. How awesome for you that it was a option. I don't know anyone who would chose not to hold their child immediately. Unfortunately, while a lot of people would probably "like" that, it's not always an option. Some people don't get to hold their babies for a while, some for a long while. I guarantee I would have "liked" to hold DS before he was a fucking week old.

Ditto. I'll never get over not having that immediate, skin-to-skin intro with DS (although I did get to briefly hold him all bundled up before they took him to the NICU, which was totally unnecessary). SO sorry you had to wait a week. That must've been hell. I hope you are able to have a much better experience this time.

alyssa719 · February 2014

Sooo.. This thread is UO THURSDAY. It's almost Saturday now. Let's let it go.

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