A little early but circumcision question

emw8910 · February 2014

I'm having a my first, and last, boy so I feel like a new mom in some aspects! lol

I'm totally clueless on the subject of circumcision and I haven't googled yet bc it can give you such mixed info.

I was just wondering if anyone has any pros and/or cons and can tell me what recovery is like after the procedure is done. Thanks ladies!

INmommy871278 · February 2014

Make sure DH is there when they take LO to have the procedure done, you will need his support. DH ran home for a bit and they came in to take DS while DH was gone, I called DH bawling telling him he had to get back.

My OB didn't do the circ, instead the pedi on call did. He used a plastibell which is a little plastic ring thing that falls off after a couple of weeks. When changing the diaper we took a wet wash cloth not fully rung out and squeezed it over his penis and put vasoline on it to keep it from sticking to the diaper. DS cried for a bit once he was back in the room, but afterwards didn't seem too bothered until diaper changing time came. Hope this helps some!

emw8910 · February 2014

Thanks! Yes it did! How long did it take for it to heal?

[Deleted User] · February 2014

I think you'll find a lot of arguments on both sides. We had DS circumcised because we felt the health benefits were worth it. Here is the statement from the AAP which pretty much says they feel the health benefits outweigh the risks but ultimately it's up to the parents.

https://www.aap.org/en-us/about-the-aap/aap-press-room/Pages/New-Benefits-Point-to-Greater-Benefits-of-Infant-Circumcision-But-Final-Say-is-Still-Up-to-parents-Says-AAP.aspx

As for recovery, DS hardly seemed fazed by it. He didn't even cry when he had it done. We used the vaseline and gauze on it for about a week until it healed and so far everything's been fine.

bgoodbpar · February 2014

For us, neither of us could go with DS. He came back content and never seemed extremely bothered by it. Vaseline is a must for recovery. The way it healed on DS is not bad but some of the skin did fuse when it healed so as he and his manly parts grow there was a time where that skin fold ended up separating and healing the way it should have to begin with. That was where DS was noticeably uncomfortable, and that didn't happen until he was 1.5 or maybe later. So that's my only con with the process.

emw8910 · February 2014

I thought I might get views from both sides, which I was hoping for bc even though the internet is great source for information, I fell like it can also be misleading when you're clueless about something.

I feel like it's the 'normal' thing to do and after reading the AAP site it seems like the better thing to do, but I worried about the recovery and healing.

Thesis for the responses so far!

bgoodbpar · February 2014

Oh and healing time was about 2 weeks or less

runrinserepeat · February 2014

Honestly, I think the most unbiased information you'll probably get is from your pediatrician. Anything you get here will be at least a little spun based on what the writer believes. It's even worse if you take to google. If you trust the pediatrician you've chosen, which you should, I'd assume you can trust his/her opinion and/or sources on this topic.

iris427 · February 2014

We didn't circ our son. He is almost 3 and his penis hasn't fallen off yet. Seriously, I don't think it is a big deal either way. There are some benefits to doing it that are worth considering, but I also don't think it needs to be done. It really comes down to what you are comfortable with.

DelilahSun · February 2014

DS is circumsized and the Dr used different one to that described above. (I have no idea how or why Drs choose their preferred method). DH and I both took him in, and I held DS's hand while the procedure was done. He sucked on his paci and was a trooper - No tears or screams - but the Dr said that definitely is not always the case. I was mentally prepared for blood-curdling wails so I was super-surprised/relieved! They gave him two freezing injections in the base of his penis, waited for them to take effect and then used a cigar-cutter type instrument to hold the foreskin, and a scalpel to remove it. Immediately afterwards the Dr put polysporin on it liberally, and that was our at-home treatment too. I fed him straight away to soothe him if he got fussy (which he started to as the freezing wore off). The healing was amazingly fast, like within 7-10 days, but the first few days genuinely hurt my heart to see what it looked like. The decision to have him circ'd was made by DH.

cakebatter27 · February 2014

DH is not and we will not with boys. I find the procedure unnecessary and for cosmetic purposes only. Teaching proper hygiene to me is a must regardless of some extra skin.

Ylvelill · February 2014

We will not if it turns out we are having boys

lindslalala · February 2014

Pros and cons have been covered so I'll just add that the recovery is nbd. I did have a little freak out the first time we unwrapped the gauze since there was some blood. I'm glad we did it and we'll do it again if this one is a boy.

pfeilele · February 2014

My pedi had both of her boys circ'd, and we choose to for health reasons. The pedi on call did DS's and he did great. We sent him away with a paci, and he came back without a tear in sight. He was really red for a couple of days but it didn't seem to bother him. We put plain a&d on after each diaper change, no gauze, and stopped after his 2 week appointment when she said everything looked good. I felt guilty sending him away but it really wasn't a big deal. We've never had problems with it.

No matter what you decide, there are pros and cons - you just have to figure out what's most important to you! There are horror stories if you do and if you don't. I just wanted to let you know that it wasn't painful for him and not really any extra work.

michellexm · February 2014

One thing some ladies have mentioned on here that may be worth a thought:

Older gentlemen in nursing homes sometimes require circumcision later in life due to infections, especially when they have limited mobility or ability to care for their own hygiene. Consider your son at all stages of life (including the ones where you won't be around) before making a decision. A rather interesting and well-written two blogs on the matter by an RN are here; consider also reading the comments and her responses as they are also valuable: https://nursegail.com/circumcision_dementia_infection_elderly-population/

https://nursegail.com/circumcision_part_2/

While these seem like super neglectful stories, keep in mind a lot of infections and skin issues occur in nursing homes, even with great care. My past job caused me to spend a lot of time dealing with nursing homes and patient needs; open sores are often a big concern for many patients in this setting. There's just a lot of opportunity for this sort of thing to happen if you end up in a nursing home, especially if you're catheterized or have some leakage/adult diaper use (all very common).

Also, I found this document helpful...but it turns out I'm having a girl, so I don't have to make this decision after all! https://www.uptodate.com/contents/circumcision-in-baby-boys-beyond-the-basics

I also think the concern about infections increases once they are out of the house and sexually active. Your three year old isn't the typical one getting infections, to my understanding. Just another thought.

Ecomom17 · February 2014

We did not have our DS circ'd. Teaching him proper hygiene pretty much takes care of most of the concerns most people cite regarding not circumcising.

I can definitely see doing it if, for example, one's DS has special needs and would therefore have a harder time caring for his own hygiene later on. I personally don't agree with doing it just b/c you're afraid that as an old man your DS MIGHT possibly be too infirm to care for it. If it comes to that he's gonna be needing care anyway.

I agree with a PP, there are certainly pros and cons on both sides and probably horror stories on both sides so you have to decide what's important to YOU. DH actually wanted to circ partly b/c he is and didn't want DS to look different but I felt strongly enough and showed him enough studies/evidence against it that he finally agreed.

snysilver · February 2014

We had DS circ'd, my ob did it in the hospital. We didn't go with, they just took him & brought him back later. The nurse told us he didn't cry at all. While he was healing, we just used lots of vasoline on the tip at every diaper change. Loved the squeezy tubes of vasoline they gave us, much easier to apply than digging vasoline out of a jar & trying to smear it on. Definitely bring home the extra squeezy tubes if that's what your hospital has.
Sorry, I don't have any great persuasive argument regarding circumcision. From DS's experience, the procedure was NBD.

AutumnBonfire · February 2014

We had DS circ'd. The on call pedi at the hospital did it and we did not go with him. She came in and took him. I'm glad because I would not want to watch that. It wasn't a plastibell and I'm not sure what the procedure was called, but I think it involved a laser. I don't remember. He was a little sleepy and cranky that day. He was only a day old and I'm not sure what his mood was supposed to be like, but that's what the nurses told me! We used the Vaseline for a few days and then his pedi told us to stop. It healed great with a little big if blood maybe the first day or two. We also grabbed as many squeezy tubes from the hospital as we could. We cloth diaper and using Vaseline on those is a no-no because it can ruin absorbency, so we used those little cotton rounds that are for taking make-up off, etc. as a little blocker between his penis and the diaper.

TallMomma29 · February 2014

My brother chose not to circumcise his sons (although he was circ'd) because after researching it they determined it was only for cosmetic purposes and did not want to subject their babies to voluntary surgery for something cosmetic.

In previous threads, I have heard a lot of people say they do it because they don't want their son to look different or be made fun of in the locker room later in life. My SIL and I asked our husbands (my brother and DH) whether they thought it would be a problem in locker rooms, and they swore that guys do not check out each other's goods in the locker room ("Absolutely not!"). SIL and I both thought that guys totally would be comparing that stuff! Now, the chance that a girl might say something about it is a different story, but I think a girl who makes a guy feel uncomfortable because he is uncirc'd is a b#%^*.

Ultimately, if we had a son the decision would be up to DH. Based on my research it doesn't seem to be a huge deal either way (it's really just cosmetic but the recovery isn't bad).

cakebatter27 · February 2014

I disagree with the first part. DH is the only guy I've been with who's not. At first I was like wtf? But only because I'd never seen one. As soon as the penis is hard (at least on DH) it looks exactly like a circumcised one to me. I can only tell a difference when it's soft.

As for the 2nd part. ..I agree it should all align. Not necessarily with just dad, but especially with other siblings. Although I asked DH once if his brother was and he said he honestly didn't even know.

cakebatter27 · February 2014

Shit. ^^^^^^ I was quoting @funnibunni80. The girls making fun part and the one cut or not looking different. I hate you mobile!!

pfeilele · February 2014

As pp said, it's understandable if your child has special needs. However, most children aren't special needs children until they are older. Consider that as well.

**I'm in no way trying to push circ'ing, just giving you some food for thought

SuperTinkerham · February 2014

I'm on the fence too. I did watch Penn & Tellers Bullshit episode where they show one of the procedures in graphic detail. They take a very hard stance that it is unnecessary and it is coming from that perspective. I thought it was interesting.

The pediatric association has since reversed its stance and says yes to circumcision.

I'm leaning towards no and mister is being obstinate and doesn't have an opinion either way.

iris427 · February 2014

funnibunni80 said:

One more thing, I think it's important to consiter the men in the new boy's life. If he has a father or close-age brothers that are uncir'd, I might leave it intact so he didn't look different from them. Questions about why he looked different are bound to come up around potty-training time. Ditto that for fathers and brothers who are circ'd.

Eh, maybe. My son is PTing age and he has never noticed that he has a foreskin and his father doesn't. Little boy genitals don't look like grown man genitals regardless of circ status. My son is more interested in the fact that I don't have a penis at all. He thinks mine is hiding LOL.

dobbyisfree · February 2014

We will circ our sons. My brother had just an AWFUL time and I know it doesnt happen to everyone but his wasnt a hygiene issue. Pieces of his skin would peel and stick to his underwear and cause him huge amounts of pain. He was 4 when my parents had to take him in and his recovery was terrible too (i was 7 and I still remember) he had to have stitches and was so uncomfy for a while. I asked him his opinion the other day and he still turns green to this day. It was rough for him. So even though it may be a slim chance, Id rather have it done quickly in the hosp than risk it be something weve gotta deal with later, and have it be worse for him. DH doesnt have a strong opinion either way,so were going to do it. But we definitely dont see it as cosmetic, because were trying to avoid the same pain in our kids.

cookieinva · February 2014

DH and DS are circ'ed and this boy will be as well

I think it is a very personal decision each family has to make for themselves and of course everyone has an opinion on it. For us the biggest factors are that the AAP believes potential benefits outweigh potential risks and that this is one of few things baby-related that my DH has a strong opinion about. We observed no issues or problems when DS had it done; it didn't really seem to phase him other than making him sleep a lot right after. DH handled the penis care so I can't comment much on that.

TheMicster · February 2014

We are planning on having our son circumcised, and it was a choice by both of us. I was on the fence, but my DH made it clear that he really wanted him to be.

I'm assuming its because he was in the military and they have communal showers, and well... I guess some taunting words were said to those who weren't, and of course my DH, (should our son go into the military) would not want our son to go through any torment if possible, but then again, there are some cruel people out there.

If it were soley up to me, I really don't know what I'd do...I respect everyones decision.

*LrCg* · February 2014

We did not circumcise DS. We do not believe it is our decision to make on his body plus the gland (meaning foreskin) was designed perfect, why change it. I would recommend the website www.mothering.com they have forums and one is a non-circumcise forum and the women there are wonderful in answering questions/concerns. DH's father was not circumcised but DH was (it was his mother's choice) so growing up DH and his father were different and it was never an issue. I'm not concern about DS being teased- if boys are looking at his penis in the locker room, I think DS has more grounds to tease them. As for when he's with girls, an erect non-circ penis looks identical to a circ penis- the only difference is visible when non-erect and I highly doubt in highschool my DS will ever have a girl be seeing his penis and it not be erect. I know that they often site UTI as reasons to do it based on studies- however the study was done on premature babies which premature babies are prone to UTI. Also, in the US, parents were improperly told to retract the foreskin to clean it- we know now that that causes damage which can cause UTI. From going to forums, I've found that in countries where its normal not to circumcise, having issues is extremely rare (even in late age) and I've often wonder if it has to do with forced retraction that occurred in the US (and unfortunately some doctors are still misinformed about it).

I really liked these websites that if people ask why we didn't and want info I always provide:

www.nocirc.org

www.doctorsopposingcircumcision.org

splaster79 · February 2014

We will not be circumcising if we have a son. We think it is medically unnecessary and for us we think it's kinda barbaric. We also don't feel that it's out right to make that kind of decision for our son. From talking to my OB nurse friend she said it is extremely painful for them. My H is not and he has never had any problems.

ashcross · February 2014

LeaLupins said:

I think you'll find a lot of arguments on both sides. We had DS circumcised because we felt the health benefits were worth it. Here is the statement from the AAP which pretty much says they feel the health benefits outweigh the risks but ultimately it's up to the parents.

https://www.aap.org/en-us/about-the-aap/aap-press-room/Pages/New-Benefits-Point-to-Greater-Benefits-of-Infant-Circumcision-But-Final-Say-is-Still-Up-to-parents-Says-AAP.aspx

As for recovery, DS hardly seemed fazed by it. He didn't even cry when he had it done. We used the vaseline and gauze on it for about a week until it healed and so far everything's been fine.

Pretty much what she said. The health benefits outweigh the risks.

I'm a FTM and I'm planning on getting our child circumcised if LO is a boy and my husband is also circumcised. I had always naturally assumed I would get my child circumcised anyways until I got pregnant and someone brought the question up to me. So I did some research and I will say, I do plan on asking them to numb his penis before they circumcise the baby and for my husband to be present. Although this being said, we don't even know the sex yet so it may not matter.

I think ultimately it's a personal decision between you and your husband.

TheMicster · February 2014

@ashcross I couldn't agree more. Great post response.

ashcross · February 2014

TheMicster said:

@ashcross I couldn't agree more. Great post response.

Thank you!

kmawb · February 2014

We will not be getting our DS circ'd. But whatever works for you and your family is fine by me.

emw8910 · February 2014

Thank you guys so much for all of the feedback! We have a lot to think about and luckily still have a lot of time to! I will be taking to our pedi but not until my daughters next appointment in April. I'll also have my husband read all of the replies and we'll go from there. Thanks again!

argonne · February 2014

Linzlu214 said:

We didn't circ our DS either. We did not believe the health benefits outweighed the risk. My DH isn't either, and has never had any issues.

This is the way we felt, too. DS isn't circ'd, nor is DH. DS has not had any issues with UTIs, etc. A the end of the day, it's technically a cosmetic surgery. I didn't feel comfortable subjecting my newborn to something unnecessary.

argonne · February 2014

jessa8907 said:

I would like to point out that there are many, many more boys not being circumcised now than 10-20 years ago. The whole locker room argument will be null and void by the time they are the age to actually be in the locker room because close to half of them will be circumcised and the other half will be un-circumcised.

I'm still choosing circumcision but if that argument is a factor in your decision this is just something to think about.

Thank you for pointing this out. Yes, the trend now is that most parents are choosing not to circ. There are actual statistics out there that I'm too lazy to look up right now. I am not really concerned about my son getting made fun of in the locker room. DH played a lot of sports that required locker rooms and communal showers. He said that not once was he made fun of because, in his words, "Guys don't check out other guys' junk. You'dget made fun of more if a dude knew you were looking at another dude's junk."

argonne · February 2014

Also, from the AAP article linked saying their are benefits to circumsion there is this line right in the first paragraph:

"New scientific evidence shows the health benefits of newborn male circumcision outweigh the risks of the procedure, but the benefits are not great enough to recommend routine circumcision for all newborn boys..."

I don't really care what other parents decide, but I thought I would just put this out there. There are benefits to the procedure (as outlined in the article). However, in European countries where cirumcision is not routinely performed, there is not a higher rate of the diseases/problems this article outlines. We can't really compare to places like Africa (which is where a lot of the pro-circ argument goes), where there is lack of access to clean bathing water, rampant HIV spread, lack of education (sexual), etc. We compare more to places like England, France, Germany, etc. where the mentioned things aren't really an issue.

runrinserepeat · February 2014

argonne said:

Also, from the AAP article linked saying their are benefits to circumsion there is this line right in the first paragraph:

"New scientific evidence shows the health benefits of newborn male circumcision outweigh the risks of the procedure, but the benefits are not great enough to recommend routine circumcision for all newborn boys..."

That's from 2012. The AAP updated their stance last year to this:

"Evaluation of current evidence indicates that the health benefits of newborn male circumcision outweigh the risks; furthermore, the benefits of newborn male circumcision justify access to this procedure for families who choose it. "

https://pediatrics.aappublications.org/content/130/3/e756.full?sid=bd9574fb-4575-4d35-a46e-a63394e68331

argonne · February 2014

kleMcK said:

argonne said:

Also, from the AAP article linked saying their are benefits to circumsion there is this line right in the first paragraph:

"New scientific evidence shows the health benefits of newborn male circumcision outweigh the risks of the procedure, but the benefits are not great enough to recommend routine circumcision for all newborn boys..."
That's from 2012. The AAP updated their stance last year to this:

"Evaluation of current evidence indicates that the health benefits of newborn male circumcision outweigh the risks; furthermore, the benefits of newborn male circumcision justify access to this procedure for families who choose it. "

https://pediatrics.aappublications.org/content/130/3/e756.full?sid=bd9574fb-4575-4d35-a46e-a63394e68331

This is the technical report the article I quoted from is in reference to. It's from August 2012. I don't care whether a family chooses to circumcise or not. It's their choice, but the AAP hasn't seen enough of a benefit to recommend routine circumcision. This report is, essentially, encouraging pediatricians/OBs/MWs etc. to give out unbiased information regarding circumcision as well as providing a standard of care for thr procedure (how it should be done, how analgesics should be applied and directions for parental care).

It's not like we all just automatically have an appendectomy because of the chance that we might get appendicitis at some point in our lives. Though you could say that the benefit outweighs the risk. I mean, the appendix doesn't do anything and it's a relativey non-invasive surgery (laproscopic) plus there is risk of death of you do get appendicitis. Same with tonsils. There is a reason doctors don't remove tonsils willy-nilly anymore.

susanskowera · February 2014

All I kept hearing in my head when I read this thread (It was a very good thread! Lots of views!) was the gay guy from the movie 28 Days (with Sandra Bullock). "I miss my foreskin"

My two cents: If we end up having a boy, I'll leave that decision up to DH. I'm not a guy, so I really have no frame of reference besides what I read on the subject.

runrinserepeat · February 2014

argonne said:

kleMcK said:

argonne said:

Also, from the AAP article linked saying their are benefits to circumsion there is this line right in the first paragraph:

"New scientific evidence shows the health benefits of newborn male circumcision outweigh the risks of the procedure, but the benefits are not great enough to recommend routine circumcision for all newborn boys..."
That's from 2012. The AAP updated their stance last year to this:

"Evaluation of current evidence indicates that the health benefits of newborn male circumcision outweigh the risks; furthermore, the benefits of newborn male circumcision justify access to this procedure for families who choose it. "

https://pediatrics.aappublications.org/content/130/3/e756.full?sid=bd9574fb-4575-4d35-a46e-a63394e68331

This is the technical report the article I quoted from is in reference to. It's from August 2012. I don't care whether a family chooses to circumcise or not. It's their choice, but the AAP hasn't seen enough of a benefit to recommend routine circumcision.

It's not like we all just automatically have an appendectomy because of the chance that we might get appendicitis at some point in our lives. Though you could say that the benefit outweighs the risk. I mean, the appendix doesn't do anything and it's a relativey non-invasive surgery (laproscopic) plus there is risk of death of you do get appendicitis. Same with tonsils. There is a reason doctors don't remove tonsils willy-nilly anymore.

You're right. My sources are a little wonky. Based on the reading I've done at aap.org, however, they neither advocate nor oppose routine circumcision, but recommend parents make the decision themselves.

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