Is anyone considering TTC yet?

Mama2be12345 · February 2014

Pregnancy kicked my ass but we will see how the next year goes and prob start trying next winter.

I'm in for team October '15

deedee1017 · February 2014

I loved being pregnant and can't wait to do it again, but we are holding off at least until dd is a year old.

Weljadraak · February 2014

I haven't thought about it. Okay, I lied. I have thought about it but not considered it. I don't think I would enjoy motherhood if I had to split my attention so soon. Maybe in 5-10 years. Then, I will evaluate where in life I am.

lefnc82 · February 2014

We will probably wait two years, maybe a little less. We def want at least two but want some space between them. Plus need to work on our financial situation before we start for number two.

reederah · February 2014

Def not now. DH and I planned on 4 but 2 is working just fine for us now. And I'm strongly considering going back to school for an unprecedented 3rd degree in the fall so it'd be smart to wait a couple years if we're going to have more anyway. But I do miss being pregnant some times!

kelle017 · February 2014

Before she was born I would have said I wanted to try around her first birthday, but now I'm not sure. Financially the pregnancy cost more than we thought it would (I think around $3300 oop for all the medical expenses) and there isn't anyway we could do that again without debt. It took a huge hit on our savings. And even if financially it was possible I had a csection and want to wait so I have a better chance of a vbac and dh is helpful most of the time, but he doesn't really get what it's like to not get a break and I'm sure I would resent him if we had a second because he would want to go out with friends etc.. Maybe we will try summer 2015.

kimbo1216 · February 2014

I'm sure it's been said and done, but

Nope octopus!

slh6363 · February 2014

We plan to wait until LO is about 2 before we start TTC....so not ready yet!

mrsblueeyes · February 2014

I think we're done, but there was NO way I could even have thought about #2 until #1 was at least 2. Life and work was so overwhelming with my first, even though he was an awesome baby

MtnChickaD · February 2014

Pretty sure we are one and done. We always said one, maybe two. I think it's easier if you SAH because thinking about daycare for two gives me a mini panic attack.

tashad18 · February 2014

We have 2, and we want one more. I want to finish having babies by the time I'm 30 (July 2016) so we will probably try once LO is 1 or 2. DS1 is Oct. 1 and LO is Oct. 5 so I will probably be in Club October 2015 as well!

PharmDMom · February 2014

Nope. Pretty sure we are done at two. DD was a cake walk and now DS is total opposite. I don't think I can roll the dice again. If I had to go through all this again and have not one, but two other kids in addition to a potentially high maintenance newborn, I would seriously lose my mind. I've been on nuvaring since 6 weeks PP and will stay on it for a long time.

sfshorter · February 2014

We'd be seriously broke with two little ones in daycare all day, otherwise I would probably want another in the next year or so.

CateOfChicago · February 2014

DD is an IVF baby. We'll defrost one of the frozen pops this spring. We'd probably do it sooner but have an out of town wedding in April. Don't want to risk lifting heavy luggage and such.

Ycu2013 · February 2014

Mmmmmmmmmmm NO.

juliemay623 · February 2014

We haven't really talked about it, but I figure if I'm the one carrying it and taking care of it, I get to decide. I'm thinking spring 2016, so 2.5-3 years apart would be good.

bnikiz · February 2014

We thought we would be done with number 2 but i want more. Dh is indifferent right now. It will be 3-4 years if we have more

BlessUrHeart29 · February 2014

We definitely want more, but we want to wait a little bit. DH is nervous about another NICU experience and said if we have to do that again, then he wants to be done with bio children. I don't necessarily feel the same way. But hopefully it won't be an issue.

sooner1981 · February 2014

Some thoughts (which apparently turned into a dissertation--i blame exhaustion):

1. If you are regularly (or even irregularly) having sex and not using birth contro, you are actually "trying to have a baby." There is no such thing as "not trying, but not preventing." We are all parents here--we know what happens when peen goes in vag without any protection.

2. The grand majority of three month olds are "easy," in the sense that you are getting on a schedule, they sleep a lot, they aren't mobile yet, not talking back/throwing tantrums, etc. Just because your three month old is easy, it doesn't mean it is going to be easy to be pregnant a second time while your little one is becoming mobile and putting every potentially-hazardous thing in their mouths, teething and staying up all night, etc.

You may be exhausted/sick and still have to take care of everything your still tiny baby needs. The second pregnancy with a small baby isn't about you and your cravings/naps on the couch on the weekend while watching tv/having your husband cater to your wishes. It is like an episode of survivor, where you just do the best you can to make it to the end--and a lot of moms feel like completely shitty parents to their first children because they just can't give them anywhere near the same quality of interaction for those months where they are either too sick or too physically uncomfortable.

With older kids, at least you can explain to them what is going on and they can entertain themselves with books, puzzles, etc. while you watch and cheer them on from the couch. Not happening with a one year old!

And it won't be easy to have two under two. I can tell you from experience (we "started trying" when our first was a year old because the first had taken a while and were pregnant two weeks later....). There are things that are great about a 19 month age gap. My daughter loves being a big sister and "taking care" of her little brother. But it is also hugely expensive, mentally exhausting to have two kids--neither of whom can really follow directions reliably or be very self-sufficient. It makes simple trips scary because even though my toddler is a great kid, I can't predict when she is going to try to run ino traffic with no warning or stick out her arm in the shopping cart and try to knock over all the glass juice bottles. And even though she loves her brother, when they both are crying, she could give a shit that he is hungry when she also wants a snack....

Tl;dr:

1. If you are having sex without protection, you are "TTC."

2. Having a "easy three month old" and "missing being pregnant" doesn't mean that your current child is going to continue to be this easy in the near future or that your second pregnancy is going to be anything like your first. And two kids are so different than one.

That said, if you are TTC, good luck!

chelseyestelle · February 2014

We are not trying now. I have the mirena. We will most likely start TTC in November-ish. I want an end of summer baby and that will make them 22-ish months apart.

Jalee85 · February 2014

@quartermisses I really wanted to be done with kids by 30...lol You never know though.

Jalee85 · February 2014

Nothing wrong with being 31. If I had an O15 baby I would be 30. That just seems perfect to me. However if it takes longer than that to have a 2nd. I won't give up just because I hit 30.

deedee1017 · February 2014

I wanted at least one kid by the time I was 30. Dd was born Oct 3, the day before my 30th birthday. <:-P

klewis888 · February 2014

deedee1017 said:
I loved being pregnant and can't wait to do it again, but we are holding off at least until dd is a year old.

This. My pregnancy experience was amazing and even the c-sec process and recovery went really smooth. I'm praying the next time around will be the same. DD is just the most amazing baby and we definitely want her to have at least one sibling.

finnybooboo · February 2014

I think we're going to wait until summer/ fall of 2015 to try for a spring /early summer 2016 baby. Hoping DD will be potty trained and her daycare costs will be less. If finances aren't good then we'll push that schedule by a year.

vvg28 · February 2014

hlb622 · February 2014

quartermisses said:

Jalee85 said:

@quartermisses I really wanted to be done with kids by 30...lol You never know though.

If I have another one (if) in 2016, I will still be 30. W00t.

Unless I happen to have a late December due date. Then I will be ancient at 31

If I have LO #2 in October 2016, I'll be 38. In other words, the crypt keeper.

huntjul · February 2014

sooner1981 said:

If you are having sex without protection, you are "TTC."

https://static2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20121218204330/glee/images/2/20/AGREE!.gif

I'm all like

https://31.media.tumblr.com/fb64854b929d1ab77150dd938be62e18/tumblr_inline_myymkeZHxz1qzaacr.gif

while DH is more like

https://p.gr-assets.com/540x540/fit/hostedimages/1380426199/851358.gif

I told him we can start discussing it in a year.

MittenJennie · February 2014

I guess I am because I'm also doing nothing to stop it. But the act has happened exactly twice. However I'm 35, it took us 3 years, 2 heartbreaks and some help of fertility drugs (clomid) for this little miracle. So I do the math and if it takes that same amount of time, I'm almost 40 or if we wait until she's two, I'm almost 40. But if we wait until she's two and we have trouble - I'm over 40.

There are times I think it would be nice for her to have a sibling. And I love this little squish so much, but I can't imagine doing all this and trying to take care of DD needs to.

My dad is a twin and he (and his brother) were born exactly 1 year and 7 days after his sister. I imagine this and I cry. @ballygirl is a true hero.

Kittymom6 · February 2014

sooner1981 said:

Tl;dr: 1. If you are having sex without protection, you are "TTC." 2. Having a "easy three month old" and "missing being pregnant" doesn't mean that your current child is going to continue to be this easy in the near future or that your second pregnancy is going to be anything like your first. And two kids are so different than one. That said, if you are TTC, good luck!

ballygirl · February 2014

I went to my OB this morning for my annual exam and was looking at the poster on the wall of each month of pregnancy and I began thinking nostalgically about being pregnant and all the anticipation and excitement, and for a brief second I thought - "oh I might want to do that again some day". Then I bitch slapped myself and snapped out of it.

[Deleted User] · February 2014

Right now the plan is to celebrate my 30th Bday exactly 2 years from now without being knocked up (so I can actually celebrate!!) and then start trying after that...if we conceive right away like with DS, they'll be about 3 years apart which is perfect IMO...we only want 2 kids though, if we wanted 3 we would probably try sooner

Also I can't even think about two kids at the moment, GAH!

SweetCFly · February 2014

If we get pregnant any time within the next 2 years everyone will know it was a big big big accident OR change in plans related to deployment.

We are planning on a Disney trip for fall 2015, DS's 2nd birthday/cousins DS's 4th birthday, with the entire family and I wouldn't want to be pregnant for that.

We are also hoping for another Oct/fall baby so most likely start TTC again January 2016... Unless a deployment comes along that might change things (hopefully not the Disney trip tho lol!).

ajjf1026 · February 2014

If we decide to have another, we will probably start trying in Fall of 2015.

BrittanyCupcakes · February 2014

DH keeps going back and forth between "one and done" and "let's get started on the next one NOW". I'd like a 2-3 year gap, and so he has time to make up his mind.

chicsahm · February 2014

OH HELL NO! We are done.... D.O.N.E.

megs1409 · February 2014

We will be TTC over the summer. LO is an awesome baby and we are not getting any younger. I really don't want to have another fall baby as my allergies were nutty in the late summer/early fall and I was miserable. Hoping that being pregnant during the winter will be "better" (if such a concept exists).

brooklynnerdymama · February 2014

I know this thread may be dead but I want to throw in my two cents on unprotected sex vs TTC. This may have been discussed elsewhere and if my contribution is old news I apologize....

As someone who had multiple bumps in the road on the way to this LO I am sensitive to the implication that if a couple is "trying" by definition if they ever have unprotected sex, then not conceiving somehow constitutes a "failure." There is a big difference between charting temps and using ovulation kits vs. a couple struggling with infertility in general that may or may not even have sex even remotely around that part of the month. I agree with the point that a resulting pregnancy cannot reasonably be labeled a surprise even if the odds were slim beforehand, but there is definitely a middle ground we are not addressing and the terminology as it is strikes me as a bit insensitive. Ok had to get that out, sorry.

And to address OP, we are waiting for an upcoming move to be over before getting serious about deciding when to start for #2 but the idea is definitely creeping up on me already to go sooner rather than later! My brain clearly does not remember what an ordeal my body just went through!

Kittymom6 · February 2014

gingerbin said:
I know this thread may be dead but I want to throw in my two cents on unprotected sex vs TTC. This may have been discussed elsewhere and if my contribution is old news I apologize....

As someone who had multiple bumps in the road on the way to this LO I am sensitive to the implication that if a couple is "trying" by definition if they ever have unprotected sex, then not conceiving somehow constitutes a "failure." There is a big difference between charting temps and using ovulation kits vs. a couple struggling with infertility in general that may or may not even have sex even remotely around that part of the month. I agree with the point that a resulting pregnancy cannot reasonably be labeled a surprise even if the odds were slim beforehand, but there is definitely a middle ground we are not addressing and the terminology as it is strikes me as a bit insensitive. Ok had to get that out, sorry.

And to address OP, we are waiting for an upcoming move to be over before getting serious about deciding when to start for #2 but the idea is definitely creeping up on me already to go sooner rather than later! My brain clearly does not remember what an ordeal my body just went through!

I agree that it was insensitive, especially because nearly everyone who said they were NTNP indicated that they had struggled to get pg and/or had undergone fertility tx. It's not always as easy as peen + vag = baby. I would be THRILLED if I got pregnant that way this time.

My gif response was meant to be sarcastic.

sweettwilight16 · February 2014

I'd like another, but it took me about 5 years to convince DH, so we are probably one and done. Although I know he loves being a dad more than he thought he would. Maybe in a year or two, but not much longer than that since I'll be 32 this year.
#teamold

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