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violetmarie61516 · January 2014

Hello everyone,<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

I know some of you from other boards (3T, IF, IFV)…the many I have been a part of at one point or another. Most of my details are in my siggy. We just cancelled our IVF cycle and are trying to do an IUI but I’m not hopeful that if we are even able to do it, we would be successful. I know that’s not a great attitude but I’m just tired. We are not sure where we are going to go from here but we have always been told that donor eggs or donor embryos will give us our best chance for a bfp. At one point we were also told donor sperm would need to be used as well but we overcame that hurdle.

I’m not sure what avenue to choose but I wanted to dip my feet in and see what other’s had to say. I want to start doing some research and learning as much as I can so that we can be prepared and ready to make our decision.

So…DE or DEmbryo….why did you choose one over the other? I’m getting some very conflicting information on the costs of each. Did you go through an agency for your donor or how did you find them?

Thanks for the help, I know I will have more questions. I’m very interested in getting to know everyone over here!

lincoln79 · January 2014

Welcome to the board, I am sorry for your hard journey.

We are using a gestational carrier, so I don't have much to add.

Just wanted to say welcome and give some (((hugs)))

ladyrader0227 · January 2014

We used Donor Egg - and our clinic found a great match for us, so no agency fee. It was the same as IVF + about $6500 for the donor. It was a difficult decision to let go of a genetic link to my future children but in the end we wanted kids more & I found my peace.

I wish you lots of luck as you continue the horrible IF journey!

liz4paws · January 2014

Hi friend! I know you can't see it, but I have my arms open big and wide welcoming you to this amazing group of women! You know my story, but one of the main reasons we chose DEmbryo is because we had both egg and sperm issues. And for the cost of a DEgg cycle, we weren't willing to take that much risk. I honestly think even without the sperm issues, cost was such a big factor that DEmbryo was just much more appealing.

Once we dipped our feet into the world of TPR, I realized that I wanted an open relationship with our donor. Many clinics didn't offer this, so I knew it would mean me finding embryos on my own. I could have used an agency, but I didn't want to have to go through a homestudy which most (if not all) agencies require. I'm really happy with the route we took, and I have found the open relationship with our donors to have been such a positive experience.

If you decide to go DEmbryo, you know how to find me. I hope you have success with your IUI, but no matter what, I hope you find peace/comfort as you go through this extremely rough chapter of IF. *hug*

cc+mm · January 2014

Hi! We chose DEgg because our clinic success rate was 70% for egg and about half of that for embryo. We used a donor through our clinic and have insurance coverage for IVF, so we really only ended up paying for the donor fee and a few other fees( I say only but it still wasn't inexpensive)

Our donor cycle left us with 18 embryos to freeze after transferring 2, and we do plan to donate our embryos after we are have completed our family. I share that only to say that some donated embryos could be from donor egg at one point. Good luck with whatever path you choose.

BeckyP005 · January 2014

Welcome and sorry about what you are going through.

Because of my age and only having one shot at this we jumped straight to DE with ICSI. MH didn't want to travel so we stayed in our hometown and found one clinic that does "shared" cycles where we share the eggs with another couple. Less expensive. The waiting list is long and not many donors so that part stinks.

Good luck to you on whatever you decide. Big hugs..

xmaystarx · January 2014

Welcome! We chose donor egg because as far as we are aware we do not have any sperm issues so having at least 1/2 genetic connection was nice. Also we chose to go with frozen eggs at RBA because the cost was much less than doing a fresh cycle (as well as not having to wait as you do for a fresh cycle). I am now waiting to transfer on Wednesday but have had a great experience with RBA.

Good luck in whatever you choose!

poohniki · January 2014

Hi!

We will most likely be doing Donor Egg/ Donor Sperm. My RE said we could try to adopt donor embryos, but they are typically from couples that have some IF issue and since the costs are about the same for us, it just made sense to go the route we did. Plus, then we have a little more control over some genetic qualities since DH and I have many physical similarities- we just always expected our children to have them. (Although at this point nothing would be more beautiful than simply a healthy baby- even if it looked nothing like either of us) I'm also hoping to get a few good blasts- maybe even have more than one child- which is a mind blowing concept to even think about at this point.

I also know that for my clinic you could find someone through an agency but the clinic may not approve them- so we intend to just use the clinics list of donors.

Wishing you lots of luck!

Lacyj67 · January 2014

Hiya!!!! Glad to see you. Sorry for your cancelled IVF.
As for us we chose donor egg because my hubs and really wanted his sperm to be in the Mix since he has no issues and I agreed but we were concerned about the cost of donor egg. We were open to both DEgg and EAdoption. We ended up going with it because our clinic found us my match and we did a shared cycle with another couple and it cut our costs in half! So instead of like 25k it ended up being around 10k because she used a lot of my leftover meds from my cancelled cycle. But I still had to put down about another 2k for FET meds. Good luck I hope this all helps your decisions.

DoublePortion · January 2014

Welcome & best wishes!

ceemonkey · January 2014

Hey there! Welcome to 3PR. I know you're probably a little disappointed but we have a great group of supportive women here.

Due to both DH & I having conditions we have to use DE + DS. If that was in the form of DEmbryo then so be it. We are trying a few cycles with DE + DS so we'll see how that goes. There's been lots of roadblocks but we are hoping this is our year. I hope it is for you as well.

Bean386 · January 2014

Hello I am new here too , we chose EA because after so many failed IUI s and tons of money spent on IVF and all kinds of treatments EA is cheaper than IVF and put way less stress on my body , having FET has a greater chance of working than keep doing IUIs that by the way are expensive since we use DS , and adoption the process is long expensive and scary . I feel like we want to be parents so badly that if God gives me the chance of carry a miracle in my womb that baby will be part of me even though we will not have the same genes

MrsT4 · January 2014

Just wanted to welcome you Love4Labs!! Best of luck as you decide what will work best for you and your situation!

violetmarie61516 · January 2014

@ceemonkey I've been searching for you! I know you have experience with DE/DS. How are you???

ceemonkey · January 2014

@Love4Labs326 I'm doing OK. Haven't been as active lately just because the last time I cycled was July! I kept having c/p & m/c so then they thought I had blood-clotting disorders, but apparently I only do when my hCG is elevated? Who knew. One more roadblock. But we are moving forward, and hope the next protocol will be the one that works. I feel like there can't be any other problems left, we've covered them all, LOL! I'm sure you feel the same.

So you're looking into either DE or DEmbryo? We looked into both but only into DEmbryo at one clinic, and the wait just got too long. GL with whatever you choose!

violetmarie61516 · January 2014

@ceemonkey That's crazy about the blood clotting thing. You are TOTALLY right....I think we've both got about everything possible checked. I really hope this next protocol is the one that is perfect for you. Have you been working with the same clinic? Do they have DE there or have you had to work through an agency?

We are looking into both options. I would like to do DE/DS but DH is hesitant because of the money. I think he is leaning towards DEmbryos but I'm concerned about the wait too. Right now I'm praying incessantly that we don't have to think about it for at least another year! Just praying this last ditch IUI will be a miracle.

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