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SIL Vent/ WWM14D?

dogsombrerodogsombrero member
in May 2014 Moms
My SIL is due 6 weeks before me. In August we got together to go to the Iowa state fair where she made a big deal about saying she was pregnant every 2 minutes and stuffing it down our throats when we had our second miscarriage in a year that June. She even asked BIL "What are my activity limits?" (She was a whopping 6 weeks!). When I finally snapped and said you know DH and I should've already had a baby in our arms she told me "It's not like you were trying".  Enough back story, She and BIL are throwing their own "co-ed" shower and want DH and I to come it's Feb 1st, a 3 hour drive away (we're in the Midwest so very possibly sh!t weather), I'll be 26 weeks and I don't like her at all. That's the vent, WWM14D?

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Re: SIL Vent/ WWM14D?

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  • MamaCheezMamaCheez member
    I wouldn't go either. Why bother doing that to yourself?

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  • HedgessmHedgessm member
    CamrynnsMommy said:
    Say being pregnant limits my ability to drive, so I won't be able to make it. I wouldn't go, how does DH feel?
    AGREED!!  She sounds... lovely... just lovely
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  • meli1025meli1025 member

    I would not go, she sounds like a real asshole. 

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  • PrincessJess19PrincessJess19 member
    CamrynnsMommy said:

    Say being pregnant limits my ability to drive, so I won't be able to make it.

    I wouldn't go, how does DH feel?

    Isn't driving one of your activity restrictions? Lol. I'd definitely be missing this one. How mean-spirited to throw it all in your face!
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  • julesf817julesf817 member

    i just can't handle "co-ed" showers. guys + baby showers? no.

    that should be reason enough not to go, imo.  


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  • Kate070Kate070 member
    lv2011 said:
    Any one who treats the miscarriage of a family member with so little empathy deserves zero respect and no future contact. So, no, I wouldn't go. I wouldn't even acknowledge the invitation. Bitch.
    This.  Screw it.  
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  • mrstengallonhat1mrstengallonhat1 member
    "Sorry, I won't be able to make it."  And leave it at that!  I wouldn't go out of my way to do anything nice for someone who trivialized a past m/c like that.
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  • sammy.ksammy.k member
    Who throws themselves their own shower?! They sound like awesome people. No I definitely wouldn't go.
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  • mimzgoymimzgoy member
    ljbreck said:

    My SIL is due 6 weeks before me. In August we got together to go to the Iowa state fair where she made a big deal about saying she was pregnant every 2 minutes and stuffing it down our throats when we had our second miscarriage in a year that June. She even asked BIL "What are my activity limits?" (She was a whopping 6 weeks!). When I finally snapped and said you know DH and I should've already had a baby in our arms she told me "It's not like you were trying".  Enough back story, She and BIL are throwing their own "co-ed" shower and want DH and I to come it's Feb 1st, a 3 hour drive away (we're in the Midwest so very possibly sh!t weather), I'll be 26 weeks and I don't like her at all. That's the vent, WWM14D?

    I'm from Des Moines (moved a away this year because of husbands job). I miss it so much, I was so bummed I missed the fair :(

    Blow off the baby shower!
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  • Miles2GoMiles2Go member
    Don't go. Send coal. 

    I'm sorry about your mc and I'm sorry you're dealing with the family douche. 

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  • TkhixenTkhixen member
    They are probably throwing their own shower because she is so vile, no friends have offered or she doesn't have any.... That's just a guess! Don't go...
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  • kristine526kristine526 member
    I wouldn't go. First of all, she sounds like a bitch. Second, midwest weather is no joke. Third, people that throw their own shower are dumb. The end.
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  • CallidryasCallidryas member
    Wait - she invited you to her own baby shower that she is throwing for herself via TEXT MSG?  On top of all of the other crap she has pulled!  No, don't go.  I like the idea of the Daddy gift. (A black diaper bag, man friendly carrier, etc.)
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  • dogsombrerodogsombrero member
    I talked to DH and he said we're definitely going to be "working" that Saturday. We'll work on sending a nice gift with a card that doesn't say "go eff yourself".
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  • Mamazon2014Mamazon2014 member
    She sounds like an absolute peach! It's no surprise that someone who can dismiss a m/c that callously has to throw her own shower! She seems like she's one of those super special snowflakes that thinks that if it's not all about her, it's not worth being a decent human being.

     








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  • dogsombrerodogsombrero member
    Yep they are definitely throwing a co-ed shower for themselves. DH and I will be sending them a nice gift (just like Christmas) but not attending. Thank you ladies for making this a guilt-free choice.
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  • MrsHovey2BMrsHovey2B member
    Send her a really ridiculous gift via snail mail and tell her you don't want to risk the weather with a baby on the way. I would also make a bitchy comment about how you were surprised she didn't think of that herself, especially since she's expecting too...then make some kind of implication that maybe she makes other rash decisions with her pregnancy regularly. Like, just respond with something like, 'Of course we won't make it! I'm shocked you even invited us, knowing how dangerous it is to travel in this kind of weather. I know that not everyone takes the safety of their unborn child seriously, but we refuse to make such a irresponsible decision.' But I would say it in a way that DRIPPED with implications that she was the irresponsible one for assuming I would come. 

    I mean, obviously that's the bitchiest thing you could possibly say, but what can I say? I'm kind of a beeotch myself and that's probably how I would handle her...in the most condescending manner possible. 
    Do I really recommend this? Probably not...you'll just fuel the fire...but if you really want to slap her in the face verbally, that's what I would do. 
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  • big0700109big0700109 member
    You could send her one of those snot suckers where she has to literally suck out the snot with her mouth.
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  • XathXath member
    big0700109 said:
    You could send her one of those snot suckers where she has to literally suck out the snot with her mouth.
    Those things are amazing.  Gross, but they're really the only thing that works aside from the hospital-grade bulb, and they're more sanitary than the hospital bulb.  

    But I totally agree with the sentiment.  In the future, you can always send your niece/nephew super-awesome-fun birthday/holiday presents that make tons of noise.  They're even better if your SIL can't remove the batteries.  Favorites I've seen include wooden train whistles and drum sets.  
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