Are you an "old" or "young" mom in your circle of friends?

Ziegeficker · January 2014

In your circle of friends, are you considered a young or an old mom? And what about for your city/town/area in general? This doesn't really have much to do with your actual age, just how your family planning pans out in comparison to the people you see the most.

I was dropping Henry off at daycare the other day while listening to some Vampire Weekend and realized I feel incredibly young pulling up to this place...but I'm 28! A lot of people in my town have kids later in life, and many of my friends up here are grad students, so I'm one of the first in our group to have children. But if you compare me to a lot of people I knew from high school, I'm way behind the curve.

What about you guys?

ykristos · January 2014

I'm basically a baby having a baby in these parts (I'm 27). Most of the parents at SS's school are about 10 years older. My partner and I were planning on waiting a couple more years, but... ta-da!

There are four other babies in our friend group that are due this summer, which is pretty rad.

jenb_99 · January 2014

I'm an old mom in my circle of friends and in my community. I had DS when I was 30, and by then most of my friends had a couple of kids. But we intentionally waited a long time. For years I said I didn't want kids till I was 30, and sure enough, around my 29th birthday I started feeling like it was finally time.

gutsysneakers · January 2014

I grew up in Michigan and ALL of my friends already have at least one kid. I moved to DC after college and among my friends, I'm one of the first to become "moms" - for this area, I think the average age is the early-mid 30's so at 28 I'm relatively young for my area.

Katemr1146 · January 2014

I'm the youngest in my group of mom friends by about 5 years.

IBackBevo · January 2014

I'm about average in my group of friends, but I'm "old" in DH's group of friends. But he is also 6 years older than I am. Most of DH's friends' children are in late elementary or even jr high and high school.

It also depends on whether you compare it with my "high school" friends or my college friends or my law school friends. I went to a small town for high school and most of them had children in their 20's. Conversely, most of my law school friends in their 30's still don't have kids.

getitdone · January 2014

Of my group of friend's I am the youngest at 32 having a baby.

spinsoffresonance · January 2014

I'm a young mom here! I was the first one of my group of friends to have a baby, I was almost 30. I'm 31 now, expecting LO2. Most of my friends are pregnant with their first. We were by far the youngest couple at our baby classes last pregnancy, mid-late 30s seems to be the norm around here.

ebox322 · January 2014

I'm pretty much a baby with babies in my area too. @jcrewgirl85 I live about halfway between Baltimore and DC (little closer to Baltimore) and I find the same thing! I'm 24 and this is my second baby and people think I'm literally 16 and pregnant. They also thought I was bat shit and doomed getting married at 22.

Pretty much anyone I know that is my age and has kids it was a super oops, I know more people on the "not even thinking about marriage or kids until after 30" train.

ykristos · January 2014

lica001 said:

I'm a young mom here! I was the first one of my group of friends to have a baby, I was almost 30. I'm 31 now, expecting LO2. Most of my friends are pregnant with their first. We were by far the youngest couple at our baby classes last pregnancy, mid-late 30s seems to be the norm around here.

You're in the Boston area, right? This is definitely what I've found, too.

Miggg · January 2014

In my city and circle, I'm normal/young. In DH's circle, on the old side. He's from a small town and a lot of his friends married their college sweehearts and started procreating in their mid-20s. A lot of my grad school friends are still single in their 30s. Which was actually my goal until DH came along and thwarted my plans for a "sex in the city" style 30-something years.

sweetky_06 · January 2014

Older than a lot of my social friends, but average among my co-workers. I was 33 for my first and will be just shy of 36 when this baby is born.

Not by choice - hoped for a our first baby at 30 which would've generally been in line with most of my friends, but my body had other plans.

Kate070 · January 2014

Well only one of our closer friends actually has a kid already (one of DH's friends), and he's not even a year yet, so I'd say we're pretty young for our group (we'll both be 27 in May). The rest of our friends aren't even considering it yet, as far as we know, and several friends are single.

brittcraw75 · January 2014

In my group of friends, I'm right in the middle, I guess. I have two friends who are (or will have) a baby or babies before me, and two who haven't yet. In the larger community of people I just generally know, I'd say I'm on the older side. And OP, I hear you..all the girls I went to high school with make me a super-old Mama, I guess.

I'm 29 and a FTM, which I feel good about, but compared to my high school classmates, I guess I'm way behind the curve.

DaisyTortilla · January 2014

I'm both. In my dad's part of the family and most of my HS friends I'm old as dirt. Lol (25) Most of them have children around 16-18. On my moms side of the family and my college friends, I am young. FWIW, I think I'm a good age to have children, for me.

Rocknroll64 · January 2014

I'm right on track I think. I'll be 30 in March and it seems like everyone I know is having babies now. Around 30 is the norm around here.

flowerx2 · January 2014

I would say I'm average age. I'm 32 and most of my friends are around that age within a few years. Most have at least one young child already.

spinsoffresonance · January 2014

ykristos said:

lica001 said:

I'm a young mom here! I was the first one of my group of friends to have a baby, I was almost 30. I'm 31 now, expecting LO2. Most of my friends are pregnant with their first. We were by far the youngest couple at our baby classes last pregnancy, mid-late 30s seems to be the norm around here.

You're in the Boston area, right? This is definitely what I've found, too.

Yes, in Boston. All of my friends having babies now are in Chicago/Midwest. Most of my Boston friends are single.

husker10 · January 2014

I'm young for my group of college/high school friends, as is DH (27 & 29 yrs old). But in our close group of friends, we're all just getting started with having babies, so I'm right in the middle.

kramja01 · January 2014

Rocknroll64 said:

I'm right on track I think. I'll be 30 in March and it seems like everyone I know is having babies now. Around 30 is the norm around here.

I agree with @Rocknroll64. I turn 30 in April and apparently a memo went out to most of my college/law school classmates that once you hit the dirty 30 you need to start reproducing. My Facebook is filled with preggos right now. I know at least 9 friends/acquaintances that will be having their first babies this spring/summer.

iadanza · January 2014

I'm a young mom both for my town and my circle of friends. I'm 29 and this will be 2.0 for me.

Jillzy86 · January 2014

I am the only one having a child in my circle of friends and DH's friends. We are 27 . The friends we grew up with and stay in touch with probably won't have kids till they are 30+. In our work circle of friends we are old. Most of the people we work with started at 18 to 23. My DH is a construction manager and I taught in the school system.

MissLadyTay · January 2014

We live in the city and we are in our late twenties. Definitely "young." In fact I got dropped from a play group after one of the moms asked how old I was (rude) and I told her (mistake). She laughed it off and said she was 42 and all of the other moms were in their late thirties or early 40s - but then never invited me back. It is hard to find other young parents around here!

bumpuser10194737 · January 2014

I am pretty average among my friends, both my closer friends from high school and my college friends. I was almost 31 when I had my first. Like other posters have said, 30 seems to be the number here, give or take a year or two. Most of us got married in our early 20s, but waited until about 30 for kids.

pandadair · January 2014

If you go by tangential Facebook friends circle, we're about average. I'd say 1/3 of my HS peeps are married with kid(s), 1/3 married/partnered no kids and 1/3 single. We're the first one of both direct circles of friends to have a kid, though, other than my friend who had an "oops" at 21. We're both turning 30 this year.

spacepotatoes · January 2014

I live in a decent sized city and I think I'm about average. I'll be 31 right around this LO's due date. I'm not the first of my friends to have kids and I won't be the last.

stinamarie412 · January 2014

I am young I guess. I'm 25 and none of my friends have any kids yet and only a couple of MH do. Most of our friends aren't married yet. It's weird though bc all the women in my moms family had kids by 21 and she had three by the time she was my age so I always thought I would start sooner.

sheriot · January 2014

I am 32, and just moved to the Boston area so most of my friends are DH's buddies' wives--all of whom either have kids, are pregnant, or are trying. I lived in DC for the past ten years and I feel like it's the same there--a little older. I'm from WV, however, and at 32 most people would consider it a miracle that I'm pregnant (;) it is, but my girls in WV have their kids MUCH earlier than the urban areas in which I've lived).

MissLadyTay · January 2014

IBackBevo said:

It also depends on whether you compare it with my "high school" friends or my college friends or my law school friends. I went to a small town for high school and most of them had children in their 20's. Conversely, most of my law school friends in their 30's still don't have kids.

This is true for me as well. A lot of the girls I went to high school with have kids. Not everyone, but most. They started right at 22 or so with their first. Of my college friends, it's like 50%. Of law school, hardly any

TaylorHam86 · January 2014

I'm 27 and I live in the town where I grew up, although I went away for college and then came back. Compared to the people I graduated with and stayed here (rather than going to college), I'm old. Plenty of people I went to HS with already have kids in 1st or 2nd grade.

But as far as the friends I still have/have now, I'm the youngest to have a baby and I feel kind of isolated. I don't have any friends with babies, or even really know anyone my age with babies, aside from FB friends from my past that I really don't keep in touch with. (ETA I'm totally ok with being a lone mommy though!) My best friend from college just told me she is 9 weeks along, though, even though she lives several states away I'm super excited for us to be experiencing the same things together!

LindsayB0505 · January 2014

I had DD when I was 28. I'll be 30 (or possibly just turn 31) when this baby is born.

In my high school friends circle I am old. They all started having babies at 22 or 23, but none went to post-secondary education at all.

Mom's I've met since having DD are about the same age as me usually.

ksyknelvr73 · January 2014

I'm young for my area that I live in - I'm really pulling that from the other moms I see picking up their kids from our daycare and that we see out and about near where we live. I'm 29 and pregnant with my second child but I have noticed a lot of the moms around me are mid-30's at least (first time moms).

HOWEVER in my group of friends from high school and where I grew up/was raised, I'm probably considered an older mom b/c they all started having kids in their very early 20's.

ckandi007 · January 2014

I'm 31 and right in the middle (I was 28 with my first). But in the Army community, I was one of the few that didn't have kids for a while!

busterbeagle · January 2014

I'm definitely way on the young side at 27 and on #2, both among friends and for where I live. We have a lot of friends who are still single.

awknyc · January 2014

Crazy to say but I'm a young mom at 33! We live in Manhattan and of my close group of girlfriends I am the only one that is married and pregnant. Some of the girls are engaged and most are still single. Makes me think maybe I'm still too young to be having my first, but I'm sure I'd think differently if I lived anywhere else.

MrsT2008 · January 2014

I was 26 when I had DD and will turn 29 shortly before my due date with this one. Most of our friends also have babies and young kids - we're all around the same age.

katesy21 · January 2014

I'm average. Most people have kids young where I live (the south). I was 24 when I had my first and most of my friends already had kids or were having them around the same time.

kat8805 · January 2014

I'm a young mom for the moms in both DH's hometown and my own when you're talking about non-oops babies. Our wedding was 11 days after my 21st, DH was 22. DD1 was born when I was 22, DD2 will be born a month+ before I turn 26. We were also one of the first couples in our group of friends, a mixed group of ages but mostly mid-20's to early 30's, to get married.

SunnySky06 · January 2014

I'm 26 and we live in a smaller town(100K), I'm practically ancient when it comes to how late we "waited" to have a baby. As a military family it's incredibly difficult for me to find other women my age without children. All of my friends back home have children already in school.

sammy.k · January 2014

I was a young mom at 27 when I had DS. Definitely one of the firsts of my friends to have a baby, but it seemed like many started having kids right after me. I'm 31 with #2 on the way and the majority of my friends have kids, just had their first or are actively trying.

oscarwao · January 2014

I'm 26 and don't have any friends with kids. In fact most of my friends are several years older and sort of acted like the world was ending for me. Seriously? I'm 26, married, and have a modest salaried job. I'd say I'm pretty darn typical, personally.