We're having a girl...wanted a boy

katec23 · January 2014

So my boyfriend and I are expecting our first baby in June. This was completely unexpected. My boyfriend never wanted children, but has warmed up to the idea... Of a boy. It was so nice to see him getting excited about having a baby boy, a mini him as he would say. I was even looking forward to the idea, since I am not much of a girly girl myself. All of our friends have boys, and my boyfriend, like most men is huge into sports and a very manly man.
For Christmas his mom got us an early gender ultrasound. We went today, and found out.... GIRL! I could instantly see the disappointment in his face. Mine as well, partially bc I know how bar he wanted a boy. Don't get me wrong. I am just happy to be blessed with a child and one who is healthy. However, after seeing him get so excited ab the possibility of a boy and him (someone who did not want kids) to be so into the idea of a baby and being let down makes me sad.
The first thing he says is why should I not be disappointed? This is all you now. I have no idea what to do with a girl!! My first reaction of course was to yell and scream. How dare he! But then I realize how hypocritical I am being, bc I infact wanted a boy too! I'm feeling pretty guilty, which is probably why I am up at 2 in the morning writing this! I should probably tell him, instead of making him feel so bad.
I am sure I will find plenty of things to get excited ab with having a baby girl. I am feeling a little let down and super guilty right now. I just want my bf to feel connected to the baby and not so helpless And detached with the fact it's a girl.
Anyone else ever have a gender let down? Advice? Only positive feedback please.

cMichelle0423 · January 2014

Just because you're having a girl doesn't necessarily mean she'll be a girly girl... Most kids will be interested in a lot of the same things their parents are interested in. So if you raise her around a lot of sports and what not, chances are she'll be into them too. And as far as your bf goes, you can try warming him up to the idea of her being a daddy's girl... When I was younger I was very close to my dad. He was at home a lot when I was younger so we spent a lot of time together watching sports, playing video games and just hanging out. As I kid I played a lot of sports like baseball and basketball... it wasn't until I was in 7th grade when I got into really girly things.

Honestly I think you'll both start to get more excited the closer you get to your dd. It's just like when you get a surprise bfp, some people are not excited at first but then as time goes by, they catch the excitment. I think you're overreacting a little... give it some time and see how it goes... If your bf is still being negative about the fact that yall are having a girl, then he's a douche. If he didn't want kids that bad, then he should have been more responsible in the birth control department....

b48kate · January 2014

katec23 said:
So my boyfriend and I are expecting our first baby in June. This was completely unexpected. My boyfriend never wanted children, but has warmed up to the idea... Of a boy. It was so nice to see him getting excited about having a baby boy, a mini him as he would say. I was even looking forward to the idea, since I am not much of a girly girl myself. All of our friends have boys, and my boyfriend, like most men is huge into sports and a very manly man.
For Christmas his mom got us an early gender ultrasound. We went today, and found out.... GIRL! I could instantly see the disappointment in his face. Mine as well, partially bc I know how bar he wanted a boy. Don't get me wrong. I am just happy to be blessed with a child and one who is healthy. However, after seeing him get so excited ab the possibility of a boy and him (someone who did not want kids) to be so into the idea of a baby and being let down makes me sad.
The first thing he says is why should I not be disappointed? This is all you now. I have no idea what to do with a girl!! My first reaction of course was to yell and scream. How dare he! But then I realize how hypocritical I am being, bc I infact wanted a boy too! I'm feeling pretty guilty, which is probably why I am up at 2 in the morning writing this! I should probably tell him, instead of making him feel so bad.
I am sure I will find plenty of things to get excited ab with having a baby girl. I am feeling a little let down and super guilty right now. I just want my bf to feel connected to the baby and not so helpless And detached with the fact it's a girl.
Anyone else ever have a gender let down? Advice? Only positive feedback please.

We could send one or two of our PGALs or infertility board members over to discuss with him what real disappointment feels like...just a thought...

Listen to @cMichelle0423, that's about as positive (and true) a response as I feel you are likely to receive.

katec23 · January 2014

Internationalkate said:

katec23 said:
So my boyfriend and I are expecting our first baby in June. This was completely unexpected. My boyfriend never wanted children, but has warmed up to the idea... Of a boy. It was so nice to see him getting excited about having a baby boy, a mini him as he would say. I was even looking forward to the idea, since I am not much of a girly girl myself. All of our friends have boys, and my boyfriend, like most men is huge into sports and a very manly man.
For Christmas his mom got us an early gender ultrasound. We went today, and found out.... GIRL! I could instantly see the disappointment in his face. Mine as well, partially bc I know how bar he wanted a boy. Don't get me wrong. I am just happy to be blessed with a child and one who is healthy. However, after seeing him get so excited ab the possibility of a boy and him (someone who did not want kids) to be so into the idea of a baby and being let down makes me sad.
The first thing he says is why should I not be disappointed? This is all you now. I have no idea what to do with a girl!! My first reaction of course was to yell and scream. How dare he! But then I realize how hypocritical I am being, bc I infact wanted a boy too! I'm feeling pretty guilty, which is probably why I am up at 2 in the morning writing this! I should probably tell him, instead of making him feel so bad.
I am sure I will find plenty of things to get excited ab with having a baby girl. I am feeling a little let down and super guilty right now. I just want my bf to feel connected to the baby and not so helpless And detached with the fact it's a girl.
Anyone else ever have a gender let down? Advice? Only positive feedback please.
We could send one or two of our PGALs or infertility board members over to discuss with him what real disappointment feels like...just a thought...

Listen to @cMichelle0423, that's about as positive (and true) a response as I feel you are likely to receive.

First of all @cmichelle0423 please don't use words like douche when speaking ab my bf. thanks.

@internationalkate again with the only positive feedback plz. Did you not read the part where I said I am happy to even be blessed with a baby.

I can't help wanting what I want and neither can he. They are my feelings. If you don't have positive things to say then don't say anything.

b48kate · January 2014

@katec23 Desiring and receiving only positive feedback is often not the most constructive way to grow and learn. I am assuming you are young, but trust me, you will learn this with age.

curlylocks3 · January 2014

It's the internet- you cannot control how people respond to your post. And considering the topic at hand, @cmichelle0423 gave an extremely level-headed response and some great advice.
The fact is, that if your boyfriend doesn't love the baby just because she's a girl (as his sperm decided) then he IS a douche.
Of course you are both allowed to have whatever feelings you want. We are also allowed to have whatever opinion we have of you and/or your boyfriend for whining over something that was a 50-50 chance in the first place.

Lwilson24 · January 2014

My bf and I are at 16wk today, this was an unexpected pregnancy but we are now both thrilled at the thought of a child except we both desperately want a boy, I mean desperately. I am already very nervous about what my reaction might be in front of the ultrasound tech if they say it's a girl. This has by far been the most stressful part of this pregnancy. I know I should be happy for any healthy baby but I can't get past just wanting a boy :-(

colllydon · January 2014

I wanted I boy. I found out yesterday it was a girl with a white spot showing on its heart. So I got over the "gender disappointment" in about 10 seconds and now all I want is to hear that my baby is ok. Maybe your boyfriend should think about that before his attitude makes you come on here to whine that his perfectly healthy baby doesn't have a penis.

Eta for gif

colllydon · January 2014

katec23 said:

Internationalkate said:

katec23 said:
So my boyfriend and I are expecting our first baby in June. This was completely unexpected. My boyfriend never wanted children, but has warmed up to the idea... Of a boy. It was so nice to see him getting excited about having a baby boy, a mini him as he would say. I was even looking forward to the idea, since I am not much of a girly girl myself. All of our friends have boys, and my boyfriend, like most men is huge into sports and a very manly man.
For Christmas his mom got us an early gender ultrasound. We went today, and found out.... GIRL! I could instantly see the disappointment in his face. Mine as well, partially bc I know how bar he wanted a boy. Don't get me wrong. I am just happy to be blessed with a child and one who is healthy. However, after seeing him get so excited ab the possibility of a boy and him (someone who did not want kids) to be so into the idea of a baby and being let down makes me sad.
The first thing he says is why should I not be disappointed? This is all you now. I have no idea what to do with a girl!! My first reaction of course was to yell and scream. How dare he! But then I realize how hypocritical I am being, bc I infact wanted a boy too! I'm feeling pretty guilty, which is probably why I am up at 2 in the morning writing this! I should probably tell him, instead of making him feel so bad.
I am sure I will find plenty of things to get excited ab with having a baby girl. I am feeling a little let down and super guilty right now. I just want my bf to feel connected to the baby and not so helpless And detached with the fact it's a girl.
Anyone else ever have a gender let down? Advice? Only positive feedback please.
We could send one or two of our PGALs or infertility board members over to discuss with him what real disappointment feels like...just a thought...

Listen to @cMichelle0423, that's about as positive (and true) a response as I feel you are likely to receive.
First of all @cmichelle0423 please don't use words like douche when speaking ab my bf. thanks.

@internationalkate again with the only positive feedback plz. Did you not read the part where I said I am happy to even be blessed with a baby.

I can't help wanting what I want and neither can he. They are my feelings. If you don't have positive things to say then don't say anything.

Just because I smell another DD

WoodsSeltzer09 · January 2014

As they say in grammer school - "you get what you get and you dont get upset"

I have never been one to care what is inbetween my baby's legs - in the grand plan it just doesn't matter. As long as at the end of the 40 weeks they are healthy and grow into happy kids i just don't care.

OP listen to @cMichelle0423 she gave you some great advise - but i do agree, your BF being an ass over the fact the baby is a girl does make him a douche.

nunzchucks · January 2014

katec23 said:

So my boyfriend and I are expecting our first baby in June. This was completely unexpected. My boyfriend never wanted children, but has warmed up to the idea... Of a boy. It was so nice to see him getting excited about having a baby boy, a mini him as he would say. I was even looking forward to the idea, since I am not much of a girly girl myself. All of our friends have boys, and my boyfriend, like most men is huge into sports and a very manly man. For Christmas his mom got us an early gender ultrasound. We went today, and found out.... GIRL! I could instantly see the disappointment in his face. Mine as well, partially bc I know how bar he wanted a boy. Don't get me wrong. I am just happy to be blessed with a child and one who is healthy. However, after seeing him get so excited ab the possibility of a boy and him (someone who did not want kids) to be so into the idea of a baby and being let down makes me sad. The first thing he says is why should I not be disappointed? This is all you now. I have no idea what to do with a girl!! My first reaction of course was to yell and scream. How dare he! But then I realize how hypocritical I am being, bc I infact wanted a boy too! I'm feeling pretty guilty, which is probably why I am up at 2 in the morning writing this! I should probably tell him, instead of making him feel so bad. I am sure I will find plenty of things to get excited ab with having a baby girl. I am feeling a little let down and super guilty right now. I just want my bf to feel connected to the baby and not so helpless And detached with the fact it's a girl. Anyone else ever have a gender let down? Advice? Only positive feedback please.

QFP

How in the world can you ask for only positive feedback when someone is unhappy about a healthy baby? I just can't... Douchebag doesn't even begin to cover what I think of your boyfriend.

LKHoffa · January 2014

I think most of us secretly have a preference over which sex which have- you don't have to feel guilty about that!

It sounds like you will be fine with having a girl once it sets it, but that you are a bit more worried about your boyfriend's feelings. I get that, but don't lose sight of the fact that these situations may be what truly reveal a lot about a person's character! He's allowed to be disappointed, but if he doesn't come around soon- if for no other reason than to make YOU feel good about this pregnancy- maybe it's a sign that this isn't a person you want to make any longer-lasting commitments to than you already have. This should be a happy time, and he should be making sure that YOU are comfortable, mama-to-be!!!

That's not meant to be preachy, just to offer a new perspective! As someone who struggled with infertility, I know how some of the other posters feel, but if he doesn't know someone who has struggled with infertility or a previous loss, I'm sure that isn't something he is even thinking about. Maybe you could share that with him!

tbmadeamistake · January 2014

My baby girl, at 20 months old, is about as far from girly girl ad you can get. She has a baby doll, but it she lugs it around to play cars and lefos with it. Dh can't wait n
Until its warm again and he can play catch with her. Sex doesn't mean she won't like sports or playing rough or any of that. Remind your bf of this, and yourself, and then relax about the other ladies being helpful.

wtfisup · January 2014

I have no patience for these dudes. There's nothing he can't do with a daughter that he could do with a son, unless he was really looking forward to dick-sword fights.

Expose him to some knowledge about gender essentialism and gender equity. And if that doesn't work, tell him to get the f- over it.

kmossgrove · January 2014

My husband and I are expecting our first baby and I must admit, we both wanted a boy. I'm pretty sure every man wants a little mini man just like them. My friends told me that a lot of times a mother knows the gender of her baby before she finds out by ultrasound, and I was 100% certain it was a boy! We went 3 weeks ago for an early gender reveal and when the ultrasound tech showed us it was a girl, I looked at my husband and he was smiling and teary eyed! Then he said 'I knew it all along.' I was so worried he was going to be upset but now he talks to my belly and rubs my belly and even likes looking a 'non-girly' baby clothes. Did I also mention that he had a name already picked out for her?!
I hope that your BF will come around eventually and see that he should feel blessed to have a healthy baby on the way. Try to stay positive and not let his words or actions get you down! :-)

apmom · January 2014

I have three girls and am pregnant with a fourth (a boy). I think everyone has initial preferences as to the gender they prefer. However, as the mom of girls, I can say that they are fun, lovable, and just as awesome as any boy could be. My kids play soccer, football, climb, run and swim just like their male cousins do. They just pee sitting down. You may not be able to control how your boyfriend feels but you can control how you feel. The baby picks up on your stress and your energy. Time to switch to positivity and joy. If your boyfriend doesn't come around then kick him to the curb. It's okay to be initially disappointed, but time to get over it. A healthy baby is a blessing, whatever gender.

wtfisup · January 2014

kmossgrove said:

My husband and I are expecting our first baby and I must admit, we both wanted a boy. I'm pretty sure every man wants a little mini man just like them.

Definitely not all. My husband wanted a girl, as did his brother, as did other guys we know. They're all pretty feminist-minded guys.

I think there are a lot of people, male and female, who want a mini-version of themselves, though. That always weirds me out. The thought of a mini-me sounds ... not good.

chaysefaith · January 2014

Fuck!! I was going to type out a legit response until I kept reading OPs comments. I was even willing to let "positive feedback only" slide until it came up again!

We wanted a boy. It's a girl. At this point I'll be happy with a baby in June.

Luna C · January 2014

katec23 said:

Anyone else ever have a gender let down? Advice? Only positive feedback please.

How's this for positive feedback: I'm positive you two are both too immature to be having a child.

dragonfly711 · January 2014

I know my husband wanted a boy, he would even say he would go to the lab and mix it up to make sure we had one. ( not so sure he was kidding lol) I wanted a girl but since I know this probably is our 1st and only child and we are in are 40s I was kind of hoping it was a boy too for my husband.

I got the phone call at work about that we were having a girl. ( had blood work done) I had to have the Dr repeat to me that it is a girl.

For me, I actually was so happy, we both would be happy either way but I knew hubby wanted a boy.

I am not very girly. I do have to dress up for work but that is about it, no make up here!!!

I am so not worried about this little girl. She will be riding quads, dirt bikes and horses. Probably will play sports too since dad loves them. She will be an outdoor kid just like her parents.

Either way if we had boy or girl, he or she would be doing the same thing since I have horses and have since I was 10 and hubby has the dirt bikes and quads.

I have a few girl friends that are so into sports that I sometimes think they are more into them than some of the guy friends I know.

I would not worry too much, having a happy healthy baby is all that matters.

I hope your husband knew that he had a 50/50 chance of having a boy so to have him be that upset, I am not sure why when he should know that there was a chance of having a girl.

dragonfly711 · January 2014

SNLT1012 said:

Fuck!! I was going to type out a legit response until I kept reading OPs comments. I was even willing to let "positive feedback only" slide until it came up again! We wanted a boy. It's a girl. At this point I'll be happy with a baby in June.

SNLT1012 HAPPY and HEALTHY BABY is all that matters!!!!!

dragonfly711 · January 2014

krptcmschfmkr128 said:

Initially, DH and I wanted a boy. We wanted that "big brother, little sister" family. Our first was a girl, and my husband and I wouldn't trade her for anything. She helps him "fix" things with tools, plays with cars, loves to get dirty, and LOVES our Jeep (we are an offroad family, a very "manly" interest).

If your boyfriend is a decent guy, he'll get over it. If he's not a decent guy, then you're going to have to find a good male figure for her to have in her life who will love her for who she is. She might turn into a girly girl, and if she does, you will deal and adjust. Just like you would have to if you had a son who turned out to be more in touch with his feminine side (or gay, or transgender, or anything else different than norm).

krptcmschfmkr128 oh man, I so want a jeep wrangler!!!! Some day, some day!!! lol

Valie18 · January 2014

Give yourselves some time to mourn the lives you thought that you would share with this first born as a boy... and then get over it. Girls are amazing.

If you two have more children, don't get excited for only one sex until you're 100% that is what you're having.

mrs_drc_rn · January 2014

People may have a preference but I don't think I could ever feel any kind of disappointment regarding my unborn child. I can't help but feel nothing but excitement! Hopefully that was just an initial reaction and he will warm up to the thought of a baby girl.

chickpea912 · January 2014

wtfisup said:

I have no patience for these dudes. There's nothing he can't do with a daughter that he could do with a son, unless he was really looking forward to dick-sword fights. Expose him to some knowledge about gender essentialism and gender equity. And if that doesn't work, tell him to get the f- over it.

I feel the need to pipe in, but there is just so much that is wrong with this post.

My biggest frustration, I think, is this seemingly common perception that sex parts between the leg automatically dictate the personality of a child. We need to expand our notions of what it means to be a boy and a girl. MUCH of this can be attributed to how you raise your child. Yes, some of what becomes their personality is naturally their personality, but don't forget about the power of nurture. I am not a girly girl, but husband is a huge sports fan, and DD has lately decided she needs to wear her pink tutu (a gift from someone else, not something I purchased myself) while wearing her Torrey Smith Ravens jersey as she watches football with her daddy. Let's not narrow the possibilities and expectations for our children before they are even born.

dragonfly711 · January 2014

krptcmschfmkr128 said:

dragonfly711 said:

krptcmschfmkr128 said:

Initially, DH and I wanted a boy. We wanted that "big brother, little sister" family. Our first was a girl, and my husband and I wouldn't trade her for anything. She helps him "fix" things with tools, plays with cars, loves to get dirty, and LOVES our Jeep (we are an offroad family, a very "manly" interest).

If your boyfriend is a decent guy, he'll get over it. If he's not a decent guy, then you're going to have to find a good male figure for her to have in her life who will love her for who she is. She might turn into a girly girl, and if she does, you will deal and adjust. Just like you would have to if you had a son who turned out to be more in touch with his feminine side (or gay, or transgender, or anything else different than norm).

krptcmschfmkr128 oh man, I so want a jeep wrangler!!!! Some day, some day!!! lol

@dragonfly711 so do we DD got her Wrangler before us (she got a blue power wheel Rubicon for Christmas). We have an '88 Cherokee fixed up for wheeling. Sadly, I won't be doing much wheeling this summer except for very light stuff.

krptcmschfmkr128 awww how cute. I so will be looking at one for our little girl when she is old enough. Yeah, I will not be doing much either, so much for kayaking this year but that is ok have some other fun stuff happening

katekat8721 · January 2014

I can so understand OP. The disappointment, the angst, staying up at 2am posting because it's just so upsetting, ugh I've been there.

You see, I really wanted a velociraptor, and am instead having a baby. Any tips for how to move past this?

For your reference, look how cute this guy is. Alas, he will never be mine *tear*

https://4.bp.blogspot.com/__IFbq2E4ELE/Snghj9kKXRI/AAAAAAAAArQ/g8Mc_7JvlGQ/s400/velociraptor-on-bike.png

kbellizio3 · January 2014

Just because it's a girl doesn't mean she can't do "boy things" (and I put that in quotes because idk what that even means). DH wanted a boy, so did I, but now he completely changed his tune. He wants a girl. But first and foremost he wants a healthy baby. (And so do i) THAT should be your BFs main concern.
Why can't girls be into sports? My dad hates sports yet I watch way more sports than my husband. My dad used to fix our cars, I was 18 months old the first time he let me "help" him change the oil. I had my own tool box by the time I was 3. My mom was the one who taught me how to play football and baseball. Not my dad. DH is a mechanic, he's already got a mini tool set picked out for baby when theyre old enough, ones pink, ones red (don't know the gender yet). So why can't girls do guy things? I'm still totally a daddy's girl.
Also screaming about it isn't going to make your BF come around quicker and neither is making him feel badly for feeling the way he does.

chaysefaith · January 2014

katekat8721 said:
I can so understand OP. The disappointment, the angst, staying up at 2am posting because it's just so upsetting, ugh I've been there.

You see, I really wanted a velociraptor, and am instead having a baby. Any tips for how to move past this?

For your reference, look how cute this guy is. Alas, he will never be mine *tear*

Are you sure? Sometimes those early ultrasounds can be hard to decipher. It could still happen! Maybe the tail was just hidden behind the cord?

chickpea912 · January 2014

katekat8721 said:

I can so understand OP. The disappointment, the angst, staying up at 2am posting because it's just so upsetting, ugh I've been there.

You see, I really wanted a velociraptor, and am instead having a baby. Any tips for how to move past this?

For your reference, look how cute this guy is. Alas, he will never be mine *tear*

QFP... because this is awesome

nunzchucks · January 2014

Wow @katekat8721 I love you so hard. I was hoping at least one of yours was a dinosaur, too.

katekat8721 · January 2014

@SNLT1012 - Oh I hope so! But I can't get my hopes up. Every day... is a struggle....

https://mashable.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Love-and-Other-Drugs.gif

Mrs_D_in_KY · January 2014

I would be more happy that the baby is healthy and has no issues. Have you thanked your lucky stars for that? And big deal it's a girl. I was a tomboy growing up with two younger brothers my whole life. Trust me a girl is not the end of the world

Csouthx · January 2014

I have just read a thread where a poor couple have sadly lost there baby at 17 weeks. Then I come across this?? I'm sure they would of been happy whatever the sex! I'm disgusted!

brennan2721 · January 2014

If he didn't want kids maybe you guys should have used a birth control method! I'm sure this little girl will be loved just as much as a little boy would have been... However use protection if your not wanting children... Some of us have been trying for several months to several years only to have miscarriage(s). So be grateful!

dragonfly711 · January 2014

emilyh107 said:

dragonfly711 said:

krptcmschfmkr128 said:

Initially, DH and I wanted a boy. We wanted that "big brother, little sister" family. Our first was a girl, and my husband and I wouldn't trade her for anything. She helps him "fix" things with tools, plays with cars, loves to get dirty, and LOVES our Jeep (we are an offroad family, a very "manly" interest).

If your boyfriend is a decent guy, he'll get over it. If he's not a decent guy, then you're going to have to find a good male figure for her to have in her life who will love her for who she is. She might turn into a girly girl, and if she does, you will deal and adjust. Just like you would have to if you had a son who turned out to be more in touch with his feminine side (or gay, or transgender, or anything else different than norm).

krptcmschfmkr128 oh man, I so want a jeep wrangler!!!! Some day, some day!!! lol

@dragonfly711 so do we DD got her Wrangler before us (she got a blue power wheel Rubicon for Christmas). We have an '88 Cherokee fixed up for wheeling. Sadly, I won't be doing much wheeling this summer except for very light stuff.
Sorry OP- off topic: We just sold our baby She was completely built for wheeling. She was more of a play/weekend vehicle and we need that money more for the new baby.

emilyh107 Oh man, I am getting teary eyed, that must have been such a hard decision. I so understand why you did. she is awesome!!!

SecondTimeinMSU · January 2014

There is a big difference between hoping for one gender and rejecting and being disappointed if it is another gender. I think either A) He'll come around and realize how incredibly foolish he was to be so upset or

Really leave it all to you in which case it is good you know now his true colors since a real dad loves his kids no matter what. I hope he does realize it is the man that determines the gender right so this is his own "fault". As far as helping him bond I don't know if there is much you can do other than give him access to the baby so he realizes this is a living breathing person he created not just an abstract idea. Have him come to the next ultrasound, have him feel the baby moving. Maybe discuss the reasons why he wanted a boy and hopefully you can help him see his daughter can totally do all of that stuff too. For the baby's sake I hope for a good outcome.

deepoceanmama · January 2014

chickpea912 said:

wtfisup said:

I have no patience for these dudes. There's nothing he can't do with a daughter that he could do with a son, unless he was really looking forward to dick-sword fights. Expose him to some knowledge about gender essentialism and gender equity. And if that doesn't work, tell him to get the f- over it.

I feel the need to pipe in, but there is just so much that is wrong with this post.

My biggest frustration, I think, is this seemingly common perception that sex parts between the leg automatically dictate the personality of a child. We need to expand our notions of what it means to be a boy and a girl. MUCH of this can be attributed to how you raise your child. Yes, some of what becomes their personality is naturally their personality, but don't forget about the power of nurture. I am not a girly girl, but husband is a huge sports fan, and DD has lately decided she needs to wear her pink tutu (a gift from someone else, not something I purchased myself) while wearing her Torrey Smith Ravens jersey as she watches football with her daddy. Let's not narrow the possibilities and expectations for our children before they are even born.

This 100 times over. What if your boyfriend's hypothetical son had grown up to enjoy cheerleading or cooking? Would he have rejected that? Your daughter will be awesome, and your boyfriend will love her. He needs to get over himself, and you need to stop defending him. If this attitude continues after the baby is born, he could do REAL damage to her self esteem.

megzep · January 2014

8-| 8-|

Carriebear22 · January 2014

My 8 year old niece is the most amazing blend of Tom boy. one half of her loves dance, cheer, girly clothes, and is a cuddlebug. But she also has this other side that loves to fish, hunt (she and her dad got a bear this year. She was so proud!), ride ATV and is a state champion wrestler! That is one bad ass little sweetheart! She is actually looks a lot like me and her personality is like me, my mom says she would assume she was mine if she didn't know better. I brag about her every chance I get. Her USMC dad was hoping for a boy too, but this little girl is way better!

flerlgirl · January 2014

Guys, I was just about to post that I just found out I'm having a velociraptor...but since @katekat8721 got her disappointing news I don't know what to do. Advice?

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We're having a girl...wanted a boy

Re: We're having a girl...wanted a boy

Married DH 7/30/11

CSC arrived 5/7/12

CHC arrived 6/2/14

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