UO Torsdag

ricekez · January 2014

My UO is that I don't get the obsession with setting up nurseries at all, ever. It seems like a sales gimmick from the stores to get parents to buy dinky decorations and themed bedding that the kid will outgrow in a couple years, anyway.

DS is 2 and his "nursery" is still a work-in-progress.

MapleLeafMama · January 2014

Hating pregnancy =\= hating the result. Not even close.

fourthnlast · January 2014

Serenla said:

My UO is I think Valentines day is just weird, DH and I do not celebrate it. It would mean more to me to get flowers or a present on some random day in May than to do it on a day when we are supposed to say I love you.

Same. DH and I do not celebrate it. Buy me flowers and a card on some random day, not because of a stupid holiday.

J&NL · January 2014

I LOVE snow. I prefer cold, snowy days over hot, summer days any day of the week!

fourthnlast · January 2014

ricekez said:

My UO is that I don't get the obsession with setting up nurseries at all, ever. It seems like a sales gimmick from the stores to get parents to buy dinky decorations and themed bedding that the kid will outgrow in a couple years, anyway. DS is 2 and his "nursery" is still a work-in-progress.

We don't do the whole "nursery" thing either. Man, I sound like a barrel of fun today. I just can't fathom spending a shit ton of money on the bedding sets that I'm the only one who cares what they will look like. We don't do crib bumpers, or dust ruffles or any of that, so I just buy a bunch of fitted crib sheets for variety and call it a day.

Andrewsgal · January 2014

I am a third time mom also and have never had to run out to babies r us after my kids were born thanks to planning and a fully stocked nursery. Especially now I know what I need and don't need. I am already 100% prepared for this baby and that takes a huge weight off.

fireflygirl12 · January 2014

It makes sense to me that people set up there nurseries early. You are super excited about the baby, you have space to do it and you actually have time/energy to do it now. Waiting until you actually need to use it means that you need to set it up around your newborn's schedule and you are more rushed as opposed to being able to work on it for several months. All that being said, I don't have anything for DS2 yet.

ZebNMichelle · January 2014

I have another one... Lovey dovey FB post between SO makes me roll my eyes. I am so glad you love your significant other but why the need to post across FB? Are you proving it to them or to me? My sisters fiancé's is the worst!

Teresa1896 · January 2014

I firmly believe you have no right to have strong, borderline offensive and ignorant opinions about politics, immigration, welfare, public assistance, etc until you really learn how "the system" works (or doesn't), and maybe have a conversation with someone who relies on public assistance. This isn't aimed at anyone in this thread, btw.
Believe what you want, but at least educate yourself so you know what the hell you're talking about. I work with low income families, and the amount of ignorance and misinformation people have about the system and the families in it is just staggering.

katieharpiceland · January 2014

Teresa1896 said:

I firmly believe you have no right to have strong, borderline offensive and ignorant opinions about politics, immigration, welfare, public assistance, etc until you really learn how "the system" works (or doesn't), and maybe have a conversation with someone who relies on public assistance. This isn't aimed at anyone in this thread, btw. Believe what you want, but at least educate yourself so you know what the hell you're talking about. I work with low income families, and the amount of ignorance and misinformation people have about the system and the families in it is just staggering.

This is also complicated by the fact that there is so much misinformation being passed around as news on the subjects. People THINK they are informed because they watch the news. In fact, they are just hearing random opinions spouted off by people with too much makeup on and perfect hair.

RocksInTheWater · January 2014

ZebNMichelle said:

I have another one... Lovey dovey FB post between SO makes me roll my eyes. I am so glad you love your significant other but why the need to post across FB? Are you proving it to them or to me? My sisters fiancé's is the worst!

They are totally AW-ish and annoying.

fourthnlast · January 2014

dani+california said:

Yeah, my nursery is done. I didn't buy bed-sets and toys and matchy-matchy things for a 'theme' cause that's NMS but we had to lay new flooring, baseboards, paint and the like and there's no way I'm doing that with a newborn in the mix. I'd also rather be doing that work at 5 months pregnant than at 9 months pregnant...also I love to decorate so any excuse to redo a room is fine by me!

Re-doing a room is totally different than the matchy theme thing I was talking about. We have to do some room shuffling in the next few weeks to make room for this little peanut.

natpirt · January 2014

deidremaria said:

I hate gift cards! the visa gift cards. My ex's family are so lazy! and they all got DD visa gift cards, what the hell is a 10year old going to do with over 200.00 in visa gift cars she got for her birthday and Christmas???? as we speak she is loading one on to her iPod, nothing like spending 100.00 at iTunes. ugh!
WHAT! Gift cards are awesome!!! If I could get all gifts (except from my bf) in gift cards I'd be the happiest girl in the world.

That's funny... the adults in my family did Secret Santa and we were able to say what we liked to receive..... I said money or a gift card (I hate people shopping for me). So at the time of exchange I gave money and aside for my gift everyone else except my giftee was unhappy with their gift. My uncle loves working on cars and skating and has everything he needed, so money it was!

katieharpiceland · January 2014

Ok, responses. Up until having this cold, I have loved being pregnant. Its just at the moment, I want to take all the drugs!! I totally get this whole growing a human makes some miserable though.

Maternity pictures are NMS. But, I don't like posing for pictures in general.

As for the people who don't have jobs are lazy argument, there are lazy/mooching people in all walks of life. With jobs and without.

strawberrytree · January 2014

fireflygirl12 said:

I think you're kind of naïve if you think anybody can just go out and get a minimum wage job. There are a lot of people competing for those types of jobs, and it is highly unlikely that if you were in a skilled profession requiring a degree previously, that they are going to hire you at McDonalds. They know that you are just going to leave as soon as something higher paying comes along, so they would much prefer to invest time in someone who is going to stick around.

ITA. My DH's position was eliminated shortly after DS1 was born. He was a teacher with two university degrees who had never been jobless in his life. You bet your ass he spent hours applying for every single job he could find- retail, server, bartender, fast food, grocery store checker, call centres, everything. He never got a single call back and was on unemployment for six months, until it ran out. He ended up going back to school to retrain in a different field and once he was a student again was able to get a job related to his new field of study. There is a such thing as being over-qualified for a position. If you worked in a professional environment, you're going to have a damn hard time finding something in the fast food industry because they know you're going to keep looking for another position and be gone the second you find one.

*sparky* · January 2014

KimC85 said:

I'm definitely not doing my nursery in a matchy matchy theme AT ALL. I was wandering around babies r us and sears over the last few days registering and the only thing I liked was plain fitted sheets. For a lamp I'm going to have to go to a real store and get one because I really don't want to spend money on a lamp with a lamb or an elephant on it when nobody in the house is going to want anything to do with it in a couple years. I'd rather get a real lamp that looks nice and that she won't be embarrassed to have in her room once she knows what it is.

That is what we did for DS's room and we are doing the same for this LO. Furniture came from a regular furniture store and she should be able to use it for years. We just ordered a normal dresser and we will fasten the changing pad on top. Glider is from a regular furniture store and can be used in the basement later. Lamps and curtains will be Target, BBB, or wherever I can find what I like.

I did get a bedding set from PBK so that was the one baby-specific thing we splurged on.

I felt the need to do all of this major stuff well before LO arrives - the lead time on getting furniture can be 12 weeks. She will be in a PNP in our sitting room for the first few weeks anyway, but with one kid to take care of already the last thing I need to deal with when I have a NB is trying to set up a nursery or time furniture deliveries.

DemoDoll · January 2014

dani+california said:
Yeah, my nursery is done.

I didn't buy bed-sets and toys and matchy-matchy things for a 'theme' cause that's NMS but we had to lay new flooring, baseboards, paint and the like and there's no way I'm doing that with a newborn in the mix.

I'd also rather be doing that work at 5 months pregnant than at 9 months pregnant...also I love to decorate so any excuse to redo a room is fine by me!

This is exactly how I feel! Last pregnancy I actually waited until I was 9 months to put the crib sheet one (don't ask me why) and I felt like a beached whale trying to get that sucker on, even at the highest setting.

J&NL · January 2014

We are doing a themed nursery and I also plan to give DDs room a make over, as well. However, it's not a baby theme. We are doing a route 66/ classic car theme for DS's room and painting the walls so that he can grow with it. If he eventually wants to change his room to something else then we can just put all of his decorations into DH's "mancave" aka the garage.

snowclouds · January 2014

ColleenSwerb said:

We were slow on our nursery because we did a TON of work. But I can tell you it for shit sure was easier to do things in there at even 8/9 months pregnant than once he arrived.

This! It's way harder to get things done around naps and exhaustion.

RedBird11 · January 2014

rockstarlaw said:

I really don't mind being pregnant all that much, but hells bells I'm terrified of giving birth. I watched that water birth video that someone posted and everyone was gushing about and even though that third-time mom said "that was so easy!" The whole thing scared me even more. I can't even read about the process. The mere thought of hearing my own vagina tear open scares to bejesus out of me. I realize the birth is inevitable, but holy cow I am scared.

I am right there with you. I don't mind being pregnant and I am so excited to meet our baby boy but I am SO terrified of birth. I was nervous before but I watched the Business of Being Born and now I am scared. I think about it almost every day and start to panic.

BeckyF82 · January 2014

My UO is that whilst I don't want to sound ungrateful, refusing to buy anything from our registry until the baby is a month old is really frickin annoying. My MIL has said she wants to spend about £400 on something "big" for the baby which is really exciting and we are really grateful for because we hardly have any money. But she is refusing to buy it until the baby is a month old because she says she is superstitious about doing it before that in case of "still birth or cot death"! gee... thanks for that vote of confidence.. What the hell are we still going to need around the £400 mark a whole month after the baby is here. Just means we are going to have to buy all that stuff ourselves and you may as well not bother. See told you it makes me sound like a bitch.

strawberrytree · January 2014

BeckyF82 said:

My UO is that whilst I don't want to sound ungrateful, refusing to buy anything from our registry until the baby is a month old is really frickin annoying. My MIL has said she wants to spend about £400 on something "big" for the baby which is really exciting and we are really grateful for because we hardly have any money. But she is refusing to buy it until the baby is a month old because she says she is superstitious about doing it before that in case of "still birth or cot death"! gee... thanks for that vote of confidence.. What the hell are we still going to need around the £400 mark a whole month after the baby is here. Just means we are going to have to buy all that stuff ourselves and you may as well not bother. See told you it makes me sound like a bitch.

I have heard of some cultures/religions who don't buy anything for baby until he/she is born because of superstition, but nothing until the baby is 1 month just in case he dies of SIDS/cot death???? Holy hell, morbid much?

Eta: If you use a carrier/wrap or a Snap and Go type thing for the first month, maybe she could get you a nice quality stroller/pram/pushchair?

deidremaria · January 2014

BeckyF82 said:
My UO is that whilst I don't want to sound ungrateful, refusing to buy anything from our registry until the baby is a month old is really frickin annoying. My MIL has said she wants to spend about £400 on something "big" for the baby which is really exciting and we are really grateful for because we hardly have any money. But she is refusing to buy it until the baby is a month old because she says she is superstitious about doing it before that in case of "still birth or cot death"! gee... thanks for that vote of confidence.. What the hell are we still going to need around the £400 mark a whole month after the baby is here. Just means we are going to have to buy all that stuff ourselves and you may as well not bother. See told you it makes me sound like a bitch.

Those superstitions annoy me. I especially hate when people say to me that buying the crib before my baby is born is bad luck.

fireflygirl12 · January 2014

BeckyF82 said:

My UO is that whilst I don't want to sound ungrateful, refusing to buy anything from our registry until the baby is a month old is really frickin annoying. My MIL has said she wants to spend about £400 on something "big" for the baby which is really exciting and we are really grateful for because we hardly have any money. But she is refusing to buy it until the baby is a month old because she says she is superstitious about doing it before that in case of "still birth or cot death"! gee... thanks for that vote of confidence.. What the hell are we still going to need around the £400 mark a whole month after the baby is here. Just means we are going to have to buy all that stuff ourselves and you may as well not bother. See told you it makes me sound like a bitch.

Well we honestly didn't need any of our nursery until after the first few weeks, so maybe you can wait and get crib/changing table/dresser type stuff until then? That does suck though.

tiffy81 · January 2014

eme520 said:

tiffy81 said:

I find it hard to believe that people can be truly unemployed for 6+ months that turns into years of not obtaining any kind of job, all the while collecting unemployment. I do believe that people can be out of their field for lengthy periods because they have a hard time getting a job related to their degree or skill/field. But I think its laziness and lack of desire to work at all when people literally have NO job for years and cry that unemployment isn't enough. My DH and I saw this woman on the news who is hoping her unemployment gets extended past the two years or so she's be on it because she will have no way to support her family if she's cut off. Really?? In two years she could've worked her way up at McDonald's, Walgreens, lowes or almost anywhere and be supporting her family, and use her unemployment as a supplement and not sole source of income. Give me a break!

Why am I not surprised that it was you who posted something like this? I'll make sure to tell my husband when he gets home (from his job) who spent about 7 months unemployed each time I moved him across country for my job that he was just really lazy.

If you read any of what I wrote, I was referring to people sitting around collecting unemployment checks not trying to get a job. Clearly your husbands situation was/is different. Don't be dumb.

lilmama412 · January 2014

BeckyF82 said:

My UO is that whilst I don't want to sound ungrateful, refusing to buy anything from our registry until the baby is a month old is really frickin annoying. My MIL has said she wants to spend about £400 on something "big" for the baby which is really exciting and we are really grateful for because we hardly have any money. But she is refusing to buy it until the baby is a month old because she says she is superstitious about doing it before that in case of "still birth or cot death"! gee... thanks for that vote of confidence.. What the hell are we still going to need around the £400 mark a whole month after the baby is here. Just means we are going to have to buy all that stuff ourselves and you may as well not bother. See told you it makes me sound like a bitch.

Woww she sounds like a peach!! You could hold off buying a crib until then. With DS we didn't have a crib until he was a few months old. We had him in a pack n play in our room, it made night feedings much easier. You could also hold off on a stroller for about a month as well.

Serenla · January 2014

.

tiffy81 said:

eme520 said:

tiffy81 said:

I find it hard to believe that people can be truly unemployed for 6+ months that turns into years of not obtaining any kind of job, all the while collecting unemployment. I do believe that people can be out of their field for lengthy periods because they have a hard time getting a job related to their degree or skill/field. But I think its laziness and lack of desire to work at all when people literally have NO job for years and cry that unemployment isn't enough. My DH and I saw this woman on the news who is hoping her unemployment gets extended past the two years or so she's be on it because she will have no way to support her family if she's cut off. Really?? In two years she could've worked her way up at McDonald's, Walgreens, lowes or almost anywhere and be supporting her family, and use her unemployment as a supplement and not sole source of income. Give me a break!

Why am I not surprised that it was you who posted something like this? I'll make sure to tell my husband when he gets home (from his job) who spent about 7 months unemployed each time I moved him across country for my job that he was just really lazy.

If you read any of what I wrote, I was referring to people sitting around collecting unemployment checks not trying to get a job. Clearly your husbands situation was/is different. Don't be dumb.

Don't make assumptions about people on aid.

Katiecave · January 2014

J&NL said:
We are doing a themed nursery and I also plan to give DDs room a make over, as well. However, it's not a baby theme. We are doing a route 66/ classic car theme for DS's room and painting the walls so that he can grow with it. If he eventually wants to change his room to something else then we can just put all of his decorations into DH's "mancave" aka the garage.

@J&NL we are doing the same theme!

I love that its not too cutesy and can still be his room decor if he likes it as he gets older or DH can put that stuff up in his office or the garage.

BeckyF82 · January 2014

strawberrytree said:

BeckyF82 said:

My UO is that whilst I don't want to sound ungrateful, refusing to buy anything from our registry until the baby is a month old is really frickin annoying. My MIL has said she wants to spend about £400 on something "big" for the baby which is really exciting and we are really grateful for because we hardly have any money. But she is refusing to buy it until the baby is a month old because she says she is superstitious about doing it before that in case of "still birth or cot death"! gee... thanks for that vote of confidence.. What the hell are we still going to need around the £400 mark a whole month after the baby is here. Just means we are going to have to buy all that stuff ourselves and you may as well not bother. See told you it makes me sound like a bitch.

I have heard of some cultures/religions who don't buy anything for baby until he/she is born because of superstition, but nothing until the baby is 1 month just in case he dies of SIDS/cot death???? Holy hell, morbid much?

Eta: If you use a carrier/wrap or a Snap and Go type thing for the first month, maybe she could get you a nice quality stroller/pram/pushchair?

Would love to say it was a cultural thing but both us and her are white British atheists so culture and religion have no bearing on it. She knows that me and DH aren't superstitious at all and we already have a pram bought my mum which we were also super grateful for. Just frustrating as she keeps banging on about how she wants to buy something "important" like my mum did but I think all the "important" stuff will have gone by then.

fireflygirl12 · January 2014

BeckyF82 said:
My UO is that whilst I don't want to sound ungrateful, refusing to buy anything from our registry until the baby is a month old is really frickin annoying. My MIL has said she wants to spend about £400 on something "big" for the baby which is really exciting and we are really grateful for because we hardly have any money. But she is refusing to buy it until the baby is a month old because she says she is superstitious about doing it before that in case of "still birth or cot death"! gee... thanks for that vote of confidence.. What the hell are we still going to need around the £400 mark a whole month after the baby is here. Just means we are going to have to buy all that stuff ourselves and you may as well not bother. See told you it makes me sound like a bitch.

Do you need a jogging stroller? You aren't supposed to jog with the baby until 6ish months and nice ones are pretty spendy.

Cecilbear · January 2014

RedBird11, oh no! I had the opposite: I was really nervous, but watched The Business of Being Born and found a little peace of mind in it. If you think it might help you to surround yourself with positive birth stories, Ina May Gaskin's Natural Childbirth is filled to the brim with them.

blahswife · January 2014

When I got out of the Army in 2012 I was unemployed for a year and a half. Benefits were still more than what my husband made at a fulltime job. There was no way I would take a job anywhere but in my field or better.

BeckyF82 · January 2014

fireflygirl12 said:

BeckyF82 said:
My UO is that whilst I don't want to sound ungrateful, refusing to buy anything from our registry until the baby is a month old is really frickin annoying. My MIL has said she wants to spend about £400 on something "big" for the baby which is really exciting and we are really grateful for because we hardly have any money. But she is refusing to buy it until the baby is a month old because she says she is superstitious about doing it before that in case of "still birth or cot death"! gee... thanks for that vote of confidence.. What the hell are we still going to need around the £400 mark a whole month after the baby is here. Just means we are going to have to buy all that stuff ourselves and you may as well not bother. See told you it makes me sound like a bitch.
Do you need a jogging stroller? You aren't supposed to jog with the baby until 6ish months and nice ones are pretty spendy.

Thanks for the suggestion but the only way I will ever be running anywhere is if there is a zombie chasing me.. Lol!

Rogue237 · January 2014

ColleenSwerb said:

I hate being pregnant too. My body hates it. I am extremely jealous of women who have super easy pregnancies. My GF last week was all "but you're not sick anymore right? You're so far, aren't you happy?!" I'm still sick every fucking day, and I feel like I have 4937 more years to go before the end. Congrats on your piece of cake pregnancy, once again mine sucks, so STFU. I think it's awesome that women love being pregnant. I truly wish I was one of them. But I'm not. And I don't want anyone else's pity. ETA: That doesn't mean that when this baby arrives I won't be over the top in love with him or her instantly. But I'd be very happy with an "easy" button to shoot me into the future a few months to skip some of this misery.

OMG a million times this. I just puked this morning. Yeah, I'm 25 weeks.

RedBird11 · January 2014

@Cecilbear thank you for the recommendation. I don't know why the documentary freaked me out so bad.

*sparky* · January 2014

BeckyF82 said:

My UO is that whilst I don't want to sound ungrateful, refusing to buy anything from our registry until the baby is a month old is really frickin annoying. My MIL has said she wants to spend about £400 on something "big" for the baby which is really exciting and we are really grateful for because we hardly have any money. But she is refusing to buy it until the baby is a month old because she says she is superstitious about doing it before that in case of "still birth or cot death"! gee... thanks for that vote of confidence.. What the hell are we still going to need around the £400 mark a whole month after the baby is here. Just means we are going to have to buy all that stuff ourselves and you may as well not bother. See told you it makes me sound like a bitch.

I don't think you sound like a bitch at all and you are right - most large purchases will have been made by then. Just trying to think of some things that are not used right away - you could use it toward a high chair, next level car seat after infant seat (which you won't need for some time), put some away for college funds, maybe a changing table if you can get away with using the PNP changing area for the first month or so.

*sparky* · January 2014

BeckyF82 said:

My UO is that whilst I don't want to sound ungrateful, refusing to buy anything from our registry until the baby is a month old is really frickin annoying. My MIL has said she wants to spend about £400 on something "big" for the baby which is really exciting and we are really grateful for because we hardly have any money. But she is refusing to buy it until the baby is a month old because she says she is superstitious about doing it before that in case of "still birth or cot death"! gee... thanks for that vote of confidence.. What the hell are we still going to need around the £400 mark a whole month after the baby is here. Just means we are going to have to buy all that stuff ourselves and you may as well not bother. See told you it makes me sound like a bitch.

I don't think you sound like a bitch at all and you are right - most large purchases will have been made by then. Just trying to think of some things that are not used right away - you could use it toward a high chair, next level car seat after infant seat (which you won't need for some time), put some away for college funds, maybe a changing table if you can get away with using the PNP changing area for the first month or so.

MamaFantastic · January 2014

i hate going to the beach.

the sand gets everywhere, the sun burns my vampire skin, the sunscreen feels nasty all over my body, and i am constantly paranoid that my fearless 3 year old will drown or be kidnapped or run away. i end up having no fun and coming home sticky and exhausted with a car full of sand and 2 loads of laundry to do.

not. worth. it.

alysemci · January 2014

eme520 said:

tiffy81 said:

I find it hard to believe that people can be truly unemployed for 6+ months that turns into years of not obtaining any kind of job, all the while collecting unemployment. I do believe that people can be out of their field for lengthy periods because they have a hard time getting a job related to their degree or skill/field. But I think its laziness and lack of desire to work at all when people literally have NO job for years and cry that unemployment isn't enough. My DH and I saw this woman on the news who is hoping her unemployment gets extended past the two years or so she's be on it because she will have no way to support her family if she's cut off. Really?? In two years she could've worked her way up at McDonald's, Walgreens, lowes or almost anywhere and be supporting her family, and use her unemployment as a supplement and not sole source of income. Give me a break!

Why am I not surprised that it was you who posted something like this? I'll make sure to tell my husband when he gets home (from his job) who spent about 7 months unemployed each time I moved him across country for my job that he was just really lazy.

I believe she said 2+ years.. Not 7 months.

alysemci · January 2014

eme520 said:

alysemciver said:

eme520 said:

tiffy81 said:

I find it hard to believe that people can be truly unemployed for 6+ months that turns into years of not obtaining any kind of job, all the while collecting unemployment. I do believe that people can be out of their field for lengthy periods because they have a hard time getting a job related to their degree or skill/field. But I think its laziness and lack of desire to work at all when people literally have NO job for years and cry that unemployment isn't enough. My DH and I saw this woman on the news who is hoping her unemployment gets extended past the two years or so she's be on it because she will have no way to support her family if she's cut off. Really?? In two years she could've worked her way up at McDonald's, Walgreens, lowes or almost anywhere and be supporting her family, and use her unemployment as a supplement and not sole source of income. Give me a break!

Why am I not surprised that it was you who posted something like this? I'll make sure to tell my husband when he gets home (from his job) who spent about 7 months unemployed each time I moved him across country for my job that he was just really lazy.
I believe she said 2+ years.. Not 7 months.

Thanks for the clarification. I'm also pretty sure, by reading, that she starts out the first sentence talking about people who are unemployed for 6+ months, but thanks for your help.

You just want to pick fights, she already told you she wasn't even talking about your situation. Also, if you could comprehend basic English she is speaking about when 6+ months TURNS INTO YEARS. Not 6+ months by itself aka not your husband.

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