Push present???

JMSbaby2014 · December 2013

It's common among my family and friends but none of my friends or my sister demanded anything their husbands wanted to do it and for my BFF that went into labor at 18 weeks and spent the remainder of her full term pregnancy on total bed rest - yeah she deserved diamonds and a lot of them! I don't think it's fair for anyone to say that a gift is financial irresponsible or that a gift is impractical - to each their own.

Soon2BMrsN · December 2013

I think it's a ridiculous "tradition" that does not even exist outside of the bump. Seriously. The baby IS the gift, you dipshits. (Not you specifically, friends...that was a collective "you").

dobbyisfree · December 2013

So, everyone whos family is enough, and hate the idea that we are so materialistic.... if your coworkers send you flowers, sayig congrats, will you return them saying this is ridiculous I am far superior to wanting any sort of gift for this occasion? It seems so silly to look down on others for wanting to have something for the occasion. I understand not wanting to be a demanding spoiled brat, but Im not about to say Im sorry that I have a sentimental husband, and i dont feel like a healthy baby is any less important. If he doesnt show up with anything but a turkey sandwich, ill still be thrilled, but Im not going to judge what anyone else wants to do.

britt6292 · December 2013

With DS my husband gave me a Pandora charm with DS's birthstone before we left the hospital. I did not consider it a push present but just a very sweet gift from DH. I love it! I say to each their own. The gift did not take away any appreciation for a healthy baby.

Thirtyodd · December 2013

ashleysyn2 said:
When is jewelry not impractical? That will never stop me or DH from buying it. There will be a lot of practical purchases being made between now and baby's arrival, so what's one gift? And what is financially irresponsible for one family may not be for another. Like I said in my post, my gift was within our means. It wasn't anything outrageously expensive by any stretch.

Still hate the term push present though.

This 100%

Oh and I hate these posts that bang on about the baby being a gift etc, if someone wants an actual gift from the father of their baby saying that the baby is a gift only infuriates me. Yes I know the baby is a gift and I am thankful and I will cherish her forever but saying that in no way changes my upset that my OH didn't get me a gift.

I didn't want jewellery but I wouldn't have said no if he had bought me some. I just wanted a small inexpensive gift that came from the heart but I never got anything :-( different strokes for different folks, some of us wanted a gift and some of us didn't.

this+gamer+chick · December 2013

Pretty sure this was invented by a jewelry company or something. I have a big family and roll my eyes at all the damn holidays we have to celebrate - I would have a lot more $ if not for that...

Thirtyodd · December 2013

biglewzer said:

Salsera29 said:

I'm saying, if you can afford it, what's the big deal? DH and I usually spend our money eating out rather than buying "things" because that's what we enjoy. (Needles to say we've saved a lot of money recently!). But if someones hubby wants an excuse to buy his wife nice jewelry, who is anyone to judge?

Agreed. But it's the fact that it's not the husband's idea, it's expected, that gets under my skin. They're being told to purchase something, and lots of times very specific somethings. That's obnoxious IMO

What's obnoxious about that? Have you ever asked for a specific thing for your birthday? Did you have a wedding list that guests had to buy certain pre- picked things for you? Did you ever ask Santa to bring you a specific toy?

If asking for a gift from your husband is obnoxious then all of that is too! You get gifts from your family on your birthday don't you, and that's to celebrate the day that your mother pushed you out of her so why shouldn't the mother of a baby get a gift on the day she gave birth then?

Hypocrisy is rife on this thread it really is! Oh and to the poster who asked if you all sent back any flowers or gifts your co workers bought well said!

LuluPMW · December 2013

Asked DH what he thought of push presents.
His response: "I haven't".

cuntasaurusrex · December 2013

I've actually never asked for a gift, and never ask for specific things for any occasion, because that's just bratty and rude IMO. That's not to say I would refuse a gift either, because that is equally rude, to turn down an offering made to you with good intentions from the giver. Thirtyodd, you sound like a self-righteous demanding brat and I'm glad to not know you IRL. I can just imagine you throwing a hissy fit over not getting your oh so deserved pretty princess gift. Shall I call you a wahmbulance?

Unknown · December 2013

This content has been removed.

biglewzer · December 2013

Thirtyodd said:

When is jewelry not impractical? That will never stop me or DH from buying it. There will be a lot of practical purchases being made between now and baby's arrival, so what's one gift? And what is financially irresponsible for one family may not be for another. Like I said in my post, my gift was within our means. It wasn't anything outrageously expensive by any stretch. Still hate the term push present though.
This 100% Oh and I hate these posts that bang on about the baby being a gift etc, if someone wants an actual gift from the father of their baby saying that the baby is a gift only infuriates me. Yes I know the baby is a gift and I am thankful and I will cherish her forever but saying that in no way changes my upset that my OH didn't get me a gift. I didn't want jewellery but I wouldn't have said no if he had bought me some. I just wanted a small inexpensive gift that came from the heart but I never got anything :-( different strokes for different folks, some of us wanted a gift and some of us didn't.

You got upset that you didn't get a gift? LOL

AMcLaws · December 2013

amlonica said:
So, everyone whos family is enough, and hate the idea that we are so materialistic.... if your coworkers send you flowers, sayig congrats, will you return them saying this is ridiculous I am far superior to wanting any sort of gift for this occasion? It seems so silly to look down on others for wanting to have something for the occasion. I understand not wanting to be a demanding spoiled brat, but Im not about to say Im sorry that I have a sentimental husband, and i dont feel like a healthy baby is any less important. If he doesnt show up with anything but a turkey sandwich, ill still be thrilled, but Im not going to judge what anyone else wants to do.

No, it's not ridiculous to accept gifts. People will give gifts. It happens. If hubby happens to gift you with diamon earrings, so be it. However, it IS ridiculous for women to DEMAND a present just because they've given birth. If I demanded a gift, my family would go out of their way to ensure I got nothing.

Salsera29 · December 2013

I told my hubby about the concept and he said, "How convenient!" (referring to the timing of my EDD and our anniversary). Then I asked him if he we would get me one if the timing was different and he said, "Sure, if you gave me a boy." ::facepalm:: lol

Thirtyodd · December 2013

aliletz said:
I've actually never asked for a gift, and never ask for specific things for any occasion, because that's just bratty and rude IMO. That's not to say I would refuse a gift either, because that is equally rude, to turn down an offering made to you with good intentions from the giver. Thirtyodd, you sound like a self-righteous demanding brat and I'm glad to not know you IRL. I can just imagine you throwing a hissy fit over not getting your oh so deserved pretty princess gift. Shall I call you a wahmbulance?

Wow the pot seems to be calling the kettle black! I'm bratty? Have you read your own post back to yourself?

Thirtyodd · December 2013

Can someone please explain what a wahmbulance is? If it's George Michael singing to me in the back of an ambulance while I'm en route to the hospital yes please do call me a wahmbulance (but not until around the end of July!).

alyssa719 · December 2013

OMFG. Seriously?

I really love how people who feel like getting a present from your Hus is such a horrible thing (or are labeling it something else because "push present" is stupid - it is, btw). It's not like it's hurting you to have other women get presents.

I don't understand how people can say in blanket statements that it's "financially irresponsible" or whatever, because some of them would be no more than $50 (for pandora charms, etc). It doesn't have to be a $2k necklace, bracelet, ring, etc.

That being said, demanding ANY present or "being upset" that you don't get one is kind of stupid. There's a huge difference between holding someone hostage with "you'd better get me this or else" and them saying "look at this sparkly I bought you to match our sparkly new baby". It definitely turns from something sweet to an obligation (which then destroys the concept of "present").

tourqeyes · December 2013

Thirtyodd said:

Salsera29 said:

I'm saying, if you can afford it, what's the big deal? DH and I usually spend our money eating out rather than buying "things" because that's what we enjoy. (Needles to say we've saved a lot of money recently!). But if someones hubby wants an excuse to buy his wife nice jewelry, who is anyone to judge?

Agreed. But it's the fact that it's not the husband's idea, it's expected, that gets under my skin. They're being told to purchase something, and lots of times very specific somethings. That's obnoxious IMO
What's obnoxious about that? Have you ever asked for a specific thing for your birthday? Did you have a wedding list that guests had to buy certain pre- picked things for you? Did you ever ask Santa to bring you a specific toy? If asking for a gift from your husband is obnoxious then all of that is too! You get gifts from your family on your birthday don't you, and that's to celebrate the day that your mother pushed you out of her so why shouldn't the mother of a baby get a gift on the day she gave birth then? Hypocrisy is rife on this thread it really is! Oh and to the poster who asked if you all sent back any flowers or gifts your co workers bought well said!

I have always been asked for this information. Have you gone to people unsolicited and done these things?? If so, interesting. So no, these instances I see as different for the reason that BL posted in the quote above.

As for the comment about flowers or gifts sent from others, again, I did not say "I like white lilies, make sure you send those to my hospital room once I have the baby!"

Thirtyodd said:
When is jewelry not impractical? That will never stop me or DH from buying it. There will be a lot of practical purchases being made between now and baby's arrival, so what's one gift? And what is financially irresponsible for one family may not be for another. Like I said in my post, my gift was within our means. It wasn't anything outrageously expensive by any stretch. Still hate the term push present though.
This 100% Oh and I hate these posts that bang on about the baby being a gift etc, if someone wants an actual gift from the father of their baby saying that the baby is a gift only infuriates me. Yes I know the baby is a gift and I am thankful and I will cherish her forever but saying that in no way changes my upset that my OH didn't get me a gift. I didn't want jewellery but I wouldn't have said no if he had bought me some. I just wanted a small inexpensive gift that came from the heart but I never got anything :-( different strokes for different folks, some of us wanted a gift and some of us didn't.

This INFURIATES you, really? Hmmmmm. You are entitled to your opinion but don't take it personally. Just because someone says the baby is a gift itself does not mean they are insulting you for wanting something.

I believe the majority of posters of those not asking or in favor of push gifts are not against others receiving them, its the notion of sitting someone down and out of nowhere explaining to them what you want once you give birth.

Personally -- I do, however, agree that ASKING for a gift unprovoked is asinine. If your spouse, family member, coworker, boss, friend, neighbor, fourth cousin twice removed, or stranger off the street wants to get you something whether big or small on their own accord, then that is a sweet gesture. The notion of going to your husband unprovoked and saying "This is what I want for giving birth" IMO makes you look immature and spoiled.

Thirtyodd · December 2013

Now

biglewzer said:

Thirtyodd said:

When is jewelry not impractical? That will never stop me or DH from buying it. There will be a lot of practical purchases being made between now and baby's arrival, so what's one gift? And what is financially irresponsible for one family may not be for another. Like I said in my post, my gift was within our means. It wasn't anything outrageously expensive by any stretch.

Still hate the term push present though.
This 100%

Oh and I hate these posts that bang on about the baby being a gift etc, if someone wants an actual gift from the father of their baby saying that the baby is a gift only infuriates me. Yes I know the baby is a gift and I am thankful and I will cherish her forever but saying that in no way changes my upset that my OH didn't get me a gift.

I didn't want jewellery but I wouldn't have said no if he had bought me some. I just wanted a small inexpensive gift that came from the heart but I never got anything :-( different strokes for different folks, some of us wanted a gift and some of us didn't.

You got upset that you didn't get a gift? LOL

Posting this video clip is verging on bullying. I was hormonal and yes I was upset at the time. There was no need for this to be posted so I think this deserves to be reported.

biglewzer · December 2013

Thirtyodd said:

Now

Thirtyodd said:

When is jewelry not impractical? That will never stop me or DH from buying it. There will be a lot of practical purchases being made between now and baby's arrival, so what's one gift? And what is financially irresponsible for one family may not be for another. Like I said in my post, my gift was within our means. It wasn't anything outrageously expensive by any stretch. Still hate the term push present though.
This 100% Oh and I hate these posts that bang on about the baby being a gift etc, if someone wants an actual gift from the father of their baby saying that the baby is a gift only infuriates me. Yes I know the baby is a gift and I am thankful and I will cherish her forever but saying that in no way changes my upset that my OH didn't get me a gift. I didn't want jewellery but I wouldn't have said no if he had bought me some. I just wanted a small inexpensive gift that came from the heart but I never got anything :-( different strokes for different folks, some of us wanted a gift and some of us didn't.

You got upset that you didn't get a gift? LOL

Posting this video clip is verging on bullying. I was hormonal and yes I was upset at the time. There was no need for this to be posted so I think this deserves to be reported.

Please, for the love of God, learn the definition of bullying.

And please keep reporting nonsense so you can get banned.

Thirtyodd · December 2013

I will have no more dealings with you on any thread, you got flagged.

biglewzer · December 2013

Thirtyodd said:

I will have no more dealings with you on any thread, you got flagged.

_________________

OMG noooooooooo not the flag! Not from you! Noooooooooooooo!

alyssa719 · December 2013

She got flagged for posting a gif? Isn't that being a *little* oversensitive??

Salsera29 · December 2013

Thirtyodd said:

Now

Thirtyodd said:

When is jewelry not impractical? That will never stop me or DH from buying it. There will be a lot of practical purchases being made between now and baby's arrival, so what's one gift? And what is financially irresponsible for one family may not be for another. Like I said in my post, my gift was within our means. It wasn't anything outrageously expensive by any stretch. Still hate the term push present though.
This 100% Oh and I hate these posts that bang on about the baby being a gift etc, if someone wants an actual gift from the father of their baby saying that the baby is a gift only infuriates me. Yes I know the baby is a gift and I am thankful and I will cherish her forever but saying that in no way changes my upset that my OH didn't get me a gift. I didn't want jewellery but I wouldn't have said no if he had bought me some. I just wanted a small inexpensive gift that came from the heart but I never got anything :-( different strokes for different folks, some of us wanted a gift and some of us didn't.

You got upset that you didn't get a gift? LOL

Posting this video clip is verging on bullying. I was hormonal and yes I was upset at the time. There was no need for this to be posted so I think this deserves to be reported.

biglewzer · December 2013

alyssa719 said:

She got flagged for posting a gif? Isn't that being a *little* oversensitive??

It's hormones

She can't control it.

tourqeyes · December 2013

Thirtyodd said:

I will have no more dealings with you on any thread, you got flagged.

Based on the guidelines we have been provided, what BL did was not a flaggable offense. Be careful with how you use that or you will find yourself banned.

She did not spam, harass, vandalize, post any personal information, or impersonate anyone. I do not see where she did anything in violation with community rules by posting a GIF.

ETA: I really wish there was a grace period where you can't flag someone for a month or two until joining. Four days doesn't give everyone enough time to understand how things work here.

biglewzer · December 2013

tourqeyes said:

Thirtyodd said:

I will have no more dealings with you on any thread, you got flagged.

ETA: I really wish there was a grace period where you can't flag someone for a month or two until joining. Four days doesn't give everyone enough time to understand how things work here.

Thirtyodd · December 2013

Perhaps it would be better for the mods then to define harassment in the thread that is supposed to explain what you can and cannot flag? Just a suggestion.

If flagging just one post that I felt was extremely rude is enough to get banned then I don't think this site is much of a loss lol.

biglewzer · December 2013

Damn GIFs get me every time!

Salsera29 · December 2013

biglewzer said:

alyssa719 said:

She got flagged for posting a gif? Isn't that being a *little* oversensitive??

It's hormones She can't control it.

Check out the "pregnancy rage" thread...it's ok for her to blame shit on hormones, but nobody else.

tourqeyes · December 2013

Thirtyodd said:

Perhaps it would be better for the mods then to define harassment in the thread that is supposed to explain what you can and cannot flag? Just a suggestion. If flagging just one post that I felt was extremely rude is enough to get banned then I don't think this site is much of a loss lol.

I did not tell you flagging one post will get you banned in my post. I told you to be careful how you use the abuse/flagging feature or you will find yourself banned.

biglewzer · December 2013

tourqeyes said:

Thirtyodd said:

Perhaps it would be better for the mods then to define harassment in the thread that is supposed to explain what you can and cannot flag? Just a suggestion. If flagging just one post that I felt was extremely rude is enough to get banned then I don't think this site is much of a loss lol.
I did not tell you flagging one post will get you banned in my post. I told you to be careful how you use the abuse/flagging feature or you will find yourself banned.

I stand by my reading comprehension assessment.

TigerLily12345 · December 2013

LOL.

Gifts from my husband are always welcome & appreciated, but no way in hell would I ever tell him that one is expected at the birth. Neither of us would also ever be caught dead using the phrase "push present"

AKbadwolf · December 2013

Well I had an awesome friend who asked if he could bring us anything and we requested pizza from this amazing pizza place. He brought it and was well loved by all. So technically he got DH and myself a push present of Pizza! :P

Teachermom09 · December 2013

My DH gave me a 3 stone necklace the day I went into labor with my son( Christmas Eve). I enjoyed it for a full 24 hours before he took it off of me and put it in his coat pocket at the hospital and it was never seen again. Sooooo this time I'm just want to make it home from the hospital with all of our belongings. And sushi would not hurt my feelings.

TurtleMonsters · December 2013

Well this thread got hilarious. Too funny. It was a ridiculous in the first place, expecting gifts over a made up purpose.

I wish "bullying" wasn't such a popular phrase these days. ppl have no clue. You devalue the word for those that are really tormented by bullying, not having any clue it's definition. Over a gif of laughing, over an "expected" gift for something that ppl have barely even heard of?!? There's been far worse on here, and yet none of that was bullying either. I can't even see how it's possible to bully on an anonymous forum like this, where no one can follow you, and you can just walk away.

Damn whoremoans.

cuntasaurusrex · December 2013

Thirtyodd said:

I've actually never asked for a gift, and never ask for specific things for any occasion, because that's just bratty and rude IMO. That's not to say I would refuse a gift either, because that is equally rude, to turn down an offering made to you with good intentions from the giver. Thirtyodd, you sound like a self-righteous demanding brat and I'm glad to not know you IRL. I can just imagine you throwing a hissy fit over not getting your oh so deserved pretty princess gift. Shall I call you a wahmbulance?
Wow the pot seems to be calling the kettle black! I'm bratty? Have you read your own post back to yourself?

The difference is I KNOW I'm a bitch. Do you?

mamakiss · December 2013

Just like "babymoon"... If I never call it a "push present" and if I never feel entitled to an elaborate gift, SO may surprise me with something. We already planned a long weekend in a treehouse b&b for a getaway before the baby, and SO asked me some probing jewelry questions and said something about getting me a "sparky something" but I don't know or expect that. I think the wording is ridiculous, I think expecting a gift and being mad if you don't get one is ridiculous, but otherwise it can be a sweet gesture from a husband or SO. I didn't think people would get so worked up over this!

Edited: I wanted to add that I plan on getting SO a nice "you're a father now" gift... Probably a watch or something similar, so it can go both ways!

tourqeyes · December 2013

Thirtyodd said:

I've actually never asked for a gift, and never ask for specific things for any occasion, because that's just bratty and rude IMO. That's not to say I would refuse a gift either, because that is equally rude, to turn down an offering made to you with good intentions from the giver. Thirtyodd, you sound like a self-righteous demanding brat and I'm glad to not know you IRL. I can just imagine you throwing a hissy fit over not getting your oh so deserved pretty princess gift. Shall I call you a wahmbulance?
Wow the pot seems to be calling the kettle black! I'm bratty? Have you read your own post back to yourself?

The difference is I KNOW I'm a bitch. Do you?

And our favorite one, ali. Don't ever forget.

V1981 · December 2013

Wine. Tequila. Beer. Vodka. Any of those are acceptable to me and should be delivered chilled to my recovery room.

cuntasaurusrex · December 2013

I'm packing a couple of airplane bottles of tequila, plastic shot glasses, and a lime in my go-bag.

Want a personalized experience?

Push present???

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