Push present???

Lmhjdw · December 2013

Many of my friends that have had babies have expected their husbands to get them a "push present" essentially a present for pushing a watermelon out your vagina! One friend got diamond earrings and the other got the matching band to her wedding band for the other side of her ring. What do you guys think about this? I told my husband I thought it was silly to spend money when I just gave birth to something that is going to be very expensive.

seells · December 2013

My push present was a baby. Super cute one too.

keshupe29 · December 2013

I agree with you that it's silly! I honestly never heard of this until a friend if mine talked about it a few months ago! I am on board with the PP that said the baby is going to be expensive enough!!

alygoo615 · December 2013

It's super common where I'm from. My husband laughed when I mentioned it to him. I don't blame him. He did more than enough when I was recovering from my c-section. I don't think I changed my first diaper until J was at least a week old.

pantherRN · December 2013

All I want is raw sushi and cold lunch meat. ETA: and a healthy baby.

DH knows I'd be upset if he bought me something expensive.

abchittam · December 2013

Umm, I guess my push present was a meal and I was very content with that! Going all day without eating is no fun so I will gladly consider that a push present.

I think it's a bit ridiculous in my own opinion. I agree with other posters that the baby is enough and will cost enough to consider going out and buying gifts.

chelseakae07 · December 2013

I definitely plan on a push present! I'm thinking solitaire diamond necklace.. But, I'm not a good person like the rest of you guys. It's my first baby so I'm taking advantage

.

biglewzer · December 2013

chelseakae07 said:

I definitely plan on a push present! I'm thinking solitaire diamond necklace.. But, I'm not a good person like the rest of you guys. It's my first baby so I'm taking advantage .

Have you told your husband of this expectation?

My husband would laugh in my face.

pammyxjean · December 2013

No thats cool. I think thats kinda weird, and we don't have that kind of money to just throw around, Id rather buy something for our new baby, not myself.

helloblueeyes · December 2013

I think I would seriously hurt my DH if he went out and spent a chunk of money right before we were going to be living off of 60% or so of what we normally do for awhile.

flmomof4 · December 2013

I think push presents are stupid. I wouldn't ask for one and wouldn't be pleased if my husband spent a lot of money at that time.

lindslalala · December 2013

If DH bought me an expensive gift for giving birth I would be like WTF? We live very simply. The only push present I need is my baby and a small glass of wine when I'm home from the hospital.

tourqeyes · December 2013

Lmhjdw said:
Many of my friends that have had babies have expected their husbands to get them a "push present"

Your friends sound lovely.

purpleXdandelion · December 2013

This never even entered my mind with DS. Do we give/get gifts for every.fricken.occasion. these days?!

melissaquinn106 · December 2013

Don't know about you ladies but I'm basically the "breadwinner" of the family. Ever since we got married my husband has bought me one extravagant (be it georgous) piece of jewelry after another. This year for Christmas I had to basically threaten him not to buy me jewelry. If my husband spends my money one more time on something we don't need (even if it's thoughtful, and stunning) I swear I'm gonna strangle him.

All I want as a push present is a Corona w lime, a bong hit, and a tray of raw sushi. :-)

chelseakae07 · December 2013

Of course! We've been budgeting our entire lives and its definitely in the plans! I think it's only fair he gets himself a PS4 and I get something pretty! I can't be the only one in this boat... Really?

emy730 · December 2013

Um if my husband buys me an expensive gift, I'll freak out. We made the choice to have a baby, I knew what that entailed. Now if he brought me a bunch of raw sushi, I wouldn't be pissed...

cakebatter27 · December 2013

Mine better be a margarita with extra salty rim.

taylorjeanne84 · December 2013

I got a "push present" (my dream wedding band) when I had DS, but it wasn't labeled that. I thought it was very sweet of DH, but I definitely never asked for or expected such an extravagant gift. It was a pleasant surprise!

*LrCg* · December 2013

I've never expected or asked for a push present but with all 3 kids he has done it for me and I think its a very sweet and thoughtful gesture. Its never something huge or widely expensive but thoughtful. I carry the baby for 10 months, have a natural med free birth then breastfeed for at least another year so for my husband to take note of that means a lot. Having a baby is a huge change on a women, your body essentially isn't yours for 2 years and although fathers have a change, its not comparable.

lindslalala · December 2013

melissaquinn106 said:
Don't know about you ladies but I'm basically the "breadwinner" of the family. Ever since we got married my husband has bought me one extravagant (be it georgous) piece of jewelry after another. This year for Christmas I had to basically threaten him not to buy me jewelry. If my husband spends my money one more time on something we don't need (even if it's thoughtful, and stunning) I swear I'm gonna strangle him.

All I want as a push present is a Corona w lime, a bong hit, and a tray of raw sushi. :-)

DH is the "breadwinner" in our family, and if he ever referred to our income as HIS money I would nut punch him.

pfeilele · December 2013

DH got me a VS gift card. I'm pretty sure it was for himself. He was sick of seeing my stretched out undies

that belly is no joke. Ruined all of my yoga pants too. But there's no way I'd want something extravagant. I'd rather buy a stroller with that money.

Thirtyodd · December 2013

I hate the term push present, there is nothing loving or romantic about that term at all.

My father always bought my mother a small gift after each of us was born, his dad would have done the same for my grandmother etc as it is expected in my family so it's definitely not a new thing. However, OH didn't get me anything and that did upset me, I didn't think it would but it did and I really can't explain why it had that effect on me. I didn't want diamonds or anything, but a box of chocolates or something would have meant the world to me but it never came.

So yes I think a man should get the mother of his child something, but I refuse to call it a push present, bloody awful name for it.

cuntasaurusrex · December 2013

If anything, I think my husband deserves a gift for not only putting up with pregnant me, but also getting through the delivery, seeing my mangled vagina, and still loving me.

biglewzer · December 2013

I always thought these were internet urban legends.

biglewzer · December 2013

emy730 said:

Um if my husband buys me an expensive gift, I'll freak out. We made the choice to have a baby, I knew what that entailed. Now if he brought me a bunch of raw sushi, I wouldn't be pissed...

My SIL brought me a giant burrito after having my daughter. I almost sucked face with her. It was amazing.

biglewzer · December 2013

Happylove27 said:

chelseakae07 said:

I definitely plan on a push present! I'm thinking solitaire diamond necklace.. But, I'm not a good person like the rest of you guys. It's my first baby so I'm taking advantage .

Have you told your husband of this expectation?

My husband would laugh in my face.
Maybe he won't laugh... I never even mentioned a push present and my husband got me the ridiculously expensive diaper bag I wanted. Some husbands will just get a gift because it's a special moment. Some won't. Either is fine! I would have been plenty happy with the spaghetti and meatballs he had for me after delivery!

No, if I ever told my husband I expected a gift from him (outside of something I needed ie. the bathrobe example, and maybe even a diaper bag)...he'd laugh in my face.

We can definitely afford it, and he'd still, quite possible, pee himself laughing at me.

Dream123456778 · December 2013

My in laws give a piece of jewelry to all daughters and daughters in law. Since they buy it I'm not saying no, but considering my mother in law has mentioned what she wants to get me several times over the last few years of IF and after miscarriages I'm not sure how I'll feel about wearing it. It kind of felt like she was trying to bribe me.

acciovino · December 2013

I'm due the day before my birthday and while I know DH will want to buy me something, I'm going to tell him that I don't want anything. A new baby is a pretty priceless birthday present!

biglewzer · December 2013

Caitlinrj said:

I'm due the day before my birthday and while I know DH will want to buy me something, I'm going to tell him that I don't want anything. A new baby is a pretty priceless birthday present!

That'll be cool to share a birthday with your baby. My husband and his mom share a birthday and it's always sweet every year.

iris427 · December 2013

The push present concept, and especially the name, grosses me out. It reminds me of women being seen as property whose whole reason for existence is to bear heirs or whatever, and so they are being rewarded for doing their job.

ksuRN09 · December 2013

I always joke with DH that I want a push present but honestly, that could consist of a cold beer or glass of wine and I'd be thrilled. Expensive gifts aren't really our thing.

alyssa719 · December 2013

@thirtyodd - I agree, it's a crappy name....

That being said, we had talked about this a while ago, and I said I wanted a small band to go with my wedding and engagement rings. Since then, I've been more wishy washy about it (yes, it's a lot of money to spend for something, etc) but I think since I initially said it, it's on his mind more. I do plan on packing him a "Daddy Survival Kit" for the hospital and am trying to figure out something for him for dealing with my nonsense.

...and to continue on alienating myself, I am really hoping that v2 doesn't decide to appear on my bday (3 days before EDD) since I would hate to have a destroyed vag as a birthday present.

acciovino · December 2013

Caitlinrj said:

I'm due the day before my birthday and while I know DH will want to buy me something, I'm going to tell him that I don't want anything. A new baby is a pretty priceless birthday present!

That'll be cool to share a birthday with your baby. My husband and his mom share a birthday and it's always sweet every year.

I'm actually having a RCS so we'll probably make the birthdays separate. I would kind of feel bad if my LO had to share a birthday with his/her mom.

TRS48 · December 2013

I think a "push present" is ridiculous and, frankly, totally financially irresponsible. My DH could afford to give me something nice but after having to buy/lease a new car (equipped to carry our offspring since my paid off one isn't), baby supplies, and a child itself (2 in my case), the last thing I need is anymore crap when we also will have to begin planning for our new children's education.

sarahdallen · December 2013

This is huge where I am. Like diamond rings and stuff. My husband asked me with DS and I thought it was ridiculous. I said if he wanted to get me anything my present should be that I was allowed to choose our take out and date night restaurants until I was satisfied. We ate sushi for 6months.

flajewel · December 2013

I'm down for some roses and a smoothie

shanaynerz · December 2013

I mentioned this to DH when pregnant with DD and he was like WTF. It's unnecessary I think. All I would want is for him to help me take care of the babies and help make sure I'm okay, too. If anything, maybe I'd like some hired help or something for after they get here! :P But that's help for him, too.

gallifreygirl · December 2013

All I want is sushi, and I have jokingly told DH several times that I want him to brings me some before I leave the hospital. I think the idea of getting something expensive when the money could be used for something we actually need, or is at least practical, is kind of silly.

Salsera29 · December 2013

Well...I think my H is planning on getting me a new wedding band for our anniversary, which is 6 days after my EDD. So I guess that would be kind of like a "push present"...but really, it would be an anniversary gift so, no.

Jayers10 · December 2013

I don't think the gifts need to be expensive (which seems to be the main objection?), and can be a sweet idea.

In my friend's family, it is a tradition for the men to get their wives necklaces that say "mother" in Hebrew after a first birth or adoption. I always thought it was kind of a nice way of saying welcome to being a mom. That being said, I wouldn't expect anything - but I think it's a nice gesture!

Want a personalized experience?

Push present???

Re: Push present???

Choose Another Board

Search Boards