March 2014 Moms

My turn to talk about weight gain

Leave now if you're tired of hearing about this...
I'm 26w4d and up until just recently, I've felt pretty ok about my weight gain. In the last 2 weeks I feel like I've ballooned up. My maternity pants aren't fitting great. I just feel round and gross.

Tell me about your experiences with weight gain: were you on the thin side pre-pregnancy and gain a lot? Did you lose a bunch post partum without much diet or exercise (I realize it will take work but I've also heard of women losing a bunch right after birth)?
I'm so very grateful for this baby and I don't want to let this overshadow the joy I feel but as someone with body issues, its something on my mind.
Thanks ladies!
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Re: My turn to talk about weight gain

  • what if I dont want to leave?
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    Unplanned pregnancy July 2005; EDD 3/27/06; birthdaughter born 3/15/06 (38w2d) (placed for adoption).
    TTC since December 2012, BFP 6/25/13. EDD 3/2/14. Baby Elias born 2/21/14 (38w5d)!
  • Well, I was hoping for puppies, unicorns and rainbows but I see that's not happening. Leftover Christmas cookies and full-fat eggnog all around!
  • Can't we wait until we have delivered to talk about how fast we're loosing the 5,0000lbs we've gained? 
  • AndreabillsAndreabills member
    edited December 2013
    So you've gained weight during the holiday season? What a surprise! Every other woman around, pregnant or not, is noticing that their pants don't fit right after a month of holiday treats.

    Talk to your doctor for a weight loss program for after you deliver, good luck!

    Edit:hit post too soon.
  • @awat8946 I think the sensitivity stems not so much from legit questions on the topic as it is from the billion posts that popped up for a while that truly had no point other than to be pretty much a weight gain check in...where, ironically everyone who posted somehow only gained like 1lb. There was no question, advice or anything...it was just what I mentioned...someone saying they were 'fat' then asking how much others gained like they needed to hear they were up less than other women. It didn't take body composition or any other factors into consideration.
  • Awat8946 said:
    I have been lurking around this forum for a few months now, I haven't commented on anything as I am from Northern Ireland and felt abit out of place (it's still great for advice) but I now feel the need to say something on the whole "weight gain being talked about" Jesus ladies if you are so offended when someone makes a post about weight gain (which clearly states what it's about before you click on it) then don't flipping click on it! Everyone here should feel like they can come on and speak about whichever they want that concerns their pregnancy without being made to feel bad about it! The minute someone comments about weight there is a good few ladies that jump on their back and get so bitchy! Why can't people talk about it?? It's a normal thing in pregnancy, I'm on a few "british" pregnancy forums and we can freely talk about weight whenever we want without it turning into a bitchfest. Some people on this really need to grow up and stop acting like your in high school. Sorry I felt I needed to say something as i think its awful that a pregnant lady can't even mention anything about weight gain or whatever without being picked on! For the record I'm 24 from Northern Ireland due march 18th with my 2nd baby. And to the ladies that want to talk about weight issues occasionally and get some advice there is plenty of other forums (bounty) that you can do so without people jumping down your throat for it! I'm sure I'll have people bitching back at me for this but I felt like I needed to have a say on this

    Yes so please go on the other forums and discuss your weight gain
  • I have read a good few of the weight gain posts to see that alot of the time it ends up that way. Where a group of ladies (usually the same ones) ganging up having a bitchfest about a post that a lot of the time is merely for some advice! If it offends certain people so much just don't read it in the first place :/ I don't get it we are all in the same position we all have questions about something some are going to offend people or whatever but you don't HAVE to read it do you, it's the ladies that choose to read it and have " a good aul bitch"
  • Awat8946 said:
    I understand that but any post that is put up about weight the lady is ambushed for it, just feel that if you can't offer advice and are clearly just going to bitch and make a big deal out of it then don't read the post in the first place. It clearly states what a post is about, if people are offended so much about it then don't read it it's pretty simple. Instead people comment and turn it into an argument and basically pick on the lady that made the post in the first place


    No- she is asking how to LOOSE weight and we are still pregnant... that is one discussion I can wait on. 

    Just as she, you , and all of us can type anything our little fingers want to, so can those that respond...

     

  • lvlichellelvlichelle member
    edited December 2013
    Weight gain post don't bother me either. I have gained a total of 22lbs so far. I went from 154 to 176 currently. Which after having Halloween (candy galore), Thanksgiving (an all you can eat, all day long and not feel guilty) then Christmas (another big meal, eat like crazy day).. I am actually surprised I didn't gain more. I will admit though, I am curious to see how fast the weight comes off.. or if I will have to work super hard to get back to my original size. I am not upset by how my body looks or by my weight.. it is all part of the package.

    Pre-pregnancy I wore a size 12-14 and large shirts (wore a size 38C sometimes D).. I didn't have a flat stomach, but I wasn't fat either. Now I am wearing XL-yoga pants, large maternity pants and large maternity shirts. I have found some men's XL tee shirts that fit too. I went up to a solid 38D and wouldn't be surprised to make it to DD once my milk comes in after birth.
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    BFP #1 10/02/06, EDD 5/1/07 Natural Miscarriage 1 week after BFP

    BFP #2 3/28/07, EDD 11/19/07 Natural Miscarriage 2 weeks after BFP

    BFP #3 1/16/11, 1st U/S - 1/28/11 HR 132bpm, Missed Miscarriage- 2/28/11, D&C 3/8/11 

    March 2011, diagnosed with MTHFR gene mutation

    "Dear Lord, I would have loved to have held my babies on my lap and tell them about You, but since I didn't get the chance, would You please hold them on Your lap and tell them about me?

     

    BFP #4 6/26/13, EDD 3/8/14, Delivered @ 40w6d
    Bethany Elizabeth born on 3/14/14 @ 6:48am weighing almost 8lbs 1oz and measuring 20 1/2 inches.


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  • Awat8946 said:

    I have read a good few of the weight gain posts to see that alot of the time it ends up that way. Where a group of ladies (usually the same ones) ganging up having a bitchfest about a post that a lot of the time is merely for some advice! If it offends certain people so much just don't read it in the first place :/ I don't get it we are all in the same position we all have questions about something some are going to offend people or whatever but you don't HAVE to read it do you, it's the ladies that choose to read it and have " a good aul bitch"

    No, her post was "I was thin. Now I'm fat and gross. Can I lose the weight quick without diet and exercise so I can be thin again?"

    We've had insightful discussions about body image and weight gain. We are not supportive of weight bitching posts that just come across as "fat is gross!!!!!!!"
    baby boy: 3.19.2014
  • So what If someone is complaining about feeling fat and gross! Why start a flipping argument over it. Whether it's about losing weight gaining weight or whatever we should be aloud to freely ask something without people bitching over it that is my point. This is the only forum I've been on that women that don't even know each other and are all on it for the same reason get into stupid high school bitchyness when they are offended by a post that already states what it's going to be about. I won't be commenting anymore on it just felt I needed to say something as I've been lurking around for awhile and seen it kept happening.
  • Some of comments are just as insensitive as my doctor telling me, in response to a drastic weight gain a few years ago that he refused to test my blood for (turns out it was due to a medical condition), to just get pregnant and breast feed and the weight would fall right off. The only problem with this brilliant suggestion is that we battled IF for 4 years.
    I'm not some skinny ninny who is scared that my worth as a woman will be diminished after giving birth or my DH wont like me anymore because I gained a few. I'm an older FTM who has struggled with weight due to a medical condition and also a lifetime of body image issues. I also feel guilty that I'm even worried about weight gain since this is our rainbow baby after over 4 years of IF and loss. I want so badly to just bask in the glow of the miracle that is happening in my belly but my reality is that I'm having some issues with ballooning up like a beached whale. Last time I checked, this is something that most women worry about at some point or another, pregnant or not.
  • clo1982 said:

    @awat8946 I think the sensitivity stems not so much from legit questions on the topic as it is from the billion posts that popped up for a while that truly had no point other than to be pretty much a weight gain check in...where, ironically everyone who posted somehow only gained like 1lb. There was no question, advice or anything...it was just what I mentioned...someone saying they were 'fat' then asking how much others gained like they needed to hear they were up less than other women. It didn't take body composition or any other factors into consideration.

    Thisssssss. I think people got really turned off when posters would say something like 'I weigh x pounds now, I'm such a fat cow.' Forgetting it seemed, that some people probably started at or above that same weight. Too, I think a lot of us feel like there just isn't much to discuss. We're all having body image issues at least some of the time because first, second, fifth, or tenth pregnancy, the body changes and the weight gain aren't always pleasant or easy. It's just a part of the process - we're all going to gain different amounts at different times, we'll gain different total amounts, and we'll lose it in different times and ways. Comparing ourselves to each other in terms of weight is not a terribly accurate (or healthy) gage - particularly if it's done numbers to numbers without consideration for the myriad of factors that make up body composition.
  • Having IF doesn't make you immune to body image issues related to weight gain during pregnancy. It's not like the longer it took you to become pregnant the less you should bitch about such superficial stuff. Like I said in my op, I haven't worried too much about it until now and I've not looked at the millions of other posts about weight gain. Unlike others, I don't go into posts and rag on the poster because its the billionth time someone asked the same thing.
  • Having IF doesn't make you immune to body image issues related to weight gain during pregnancy. It's not like the longer it took you to become pregnant the less you should bitch about such superficial stuff. Like I said in my op, I haven't worried too much about it until now and I've not looked at the millions of other posts about weight gain. Unlike others, I don't go into posts and rag on the poster because its the billionth time someone asked the same thing.
  • Awat8946 said:

    So what If someone is complaining about feeling fat and gross! Why start a flipping argument over it. Whether it's about losing weight gaining weight or whatever we should be aloud to freely ask something without people bitching over it that is my point. This is the only forum I've been on that women that don't even know each other and are all on it for the same reason get into stupid high school bitchyness when they are offended by a post that already states what it's going to be about. I won't be commenting anymore on it just felt I needed to say something as I've been lurking around for awhile and seen it kept happening.

    You are the only one starting an argument. And you seem to be missing the point - when we catch ourselves feeling fat and gross this type of thinking needs to stop. It is not healthy to treat ourselves so unkindly. We are beating ourselves up for experiencing the side effects of growing another human bring. For OP who admits to body issues and alludes to concern that it could interfere with her joy, focusing on the scale is not productive nor good. Instead, shifting the focus to living a more healthy lifestyle, ignoring the numbers for now, and finding happiness with what her body is capable of is a better thing to focus on.



    Officially started TTC January 2012
    Dx with PCOS November 2012
    2/2013 - First round of Femara - No O
    Took 2 months to get vaccinated from the chickenpox
    5/2013 - Second round Femara - No O
    6/2013 - Third round of Femara + HCG Trigger Shot = O!
    7/18/2013 - Found out I was pregnant
    Dx with Gestational Diabetes at 28 weeks
    Dx with Macrosomia at 33 weeks
    Taking Glyburide and Metformin to control GD
    Due date is March 29th but we are moving forward with a scheduled C-Section on March 25th

  • Awat8946 said:

    So what If someone is complaining about feeling fat and gross! Why start a flipping argument over it. Whether it's about losing weight gaining weight or whatever we should be aloud to freely ask something without people bitching over it that is my point. This is the only forum I've been on that women that don't even know each other and are all on it for the same reason get into stupid high school bitchyness when they are offended by a post that already states what it's going to be about. I won't be commenting anymore on it just felt I needed to say something as I've been lurking around for awhile and seen it kept happening.

    You are the only one starting an argument. And you seem to be missing the point - when we catch ourselves feeling fat and gross this type of thinking needs to stop. It is not healthy to treat ourselves so unkindly. We are beating ourselves up for experiencing the side effects of growing another human bring. For OP who admits to body issues and alludes to concern that it could interfere with her joy, focusing on the scale is not productive nor good. Instead, shifting the focus to living a more healthy lifestyle, ignoring the numbers for now, and finding happiness with what her body is capable of is a better thing to focus on.
    In all fairness, I asked for people's experiences, not how to deal with body image issues or how to stop my stinkin' thinkin'. Right now I'm just concerned with what other women on this board have experienced, not with dealing with the larger issue of women not embracing the glory of their pregnant-ness, extra lbs and all.



  • Having IF doesn't make you immune to body image issues related to weight gain during pregnancy. It's not like the longer it took you to become pregnant the less you should bitch about such superficial stuff. Like I said in my op, I haven't worried too much about it until now and I've not looked at the millions of other posts about weight gain. Unlike others, I don't go into posts and rag on the poster because its the billionth time someone asked the same thing.

    This is true. But, coming from a similar places and multiple losses at different points along the way, it CAN be the thing that puts you back in a good frame of mind. What we're doing - making tiny little humans! - is utterly miraculous. And many of us know, only too well, that sometimes it doesn't go as we'd imagined. So, even though I may not love every body change as it's happening, I do make an effort to turn any negative feelings into reminding myself that every change and every pound is another step closer to maybe getting to bring a baby home this time. Things like weight, they'll work themselves out later. Right now, I'm busy makin' a baby. [-O<
  • Some of comments are just as insensitive as my doctor telling me, in response to a drastic weight gain a few years ago that he refused to test my blood for (turns out it was due to a medical condition), to just get pregnant and breast feed and the weight would fall right off. The only problem with this brilliant suggestion is that we battled IF for 4 years.
    I'm not some skinny ninny who is scared that my worth as a woman will be diminished after giving birth or my DH wont like me anymore because I gained a few. I'm an older FTM who has struggled with weight due to a medical condition and also a lifetime of body image issues. I also feel guilty that I'm even worried about weight gain since this is our rainbow baby after over 4 years of IF and loss. I want so badly to just bask in the glow of the miracle that is happening in my belly but my reality is that I'm having some issues with ballooning up like a beached whale. Last time I checked, this is something that most women worry about at some point or another, pregnant or not.

    Though I didn't have to battle IF as long as you, I know that for me it can force you to feel guilty about any negative feelings you have about pregnancy side effects. While a normal feeling, it's not healthy for you. I received counseling after my PCOS diagnosis and while I was undergoing fertility treatments which helped me with reprogramming the negative thoughts, dealing with my grief, relaxation skills to get through those procedures, etc.

    Focus on being healthy, take care of yourself, get help if this is interfering with your ability to be happy, and maybe even consider asking for a recommendation for a nutritionist post baby to help develop a program that takes into account your medical condition.
    Officially started TTC January 2012
    Dx with PCOS November 2012
    2/2013 - First round of Femara - No O
    Took 2 months to get vaccinated from the chickenpox
    5/2013 - Second round Femara - No O
    6/2013 - Third round of Femara + HCG Trigger Shot = O!
    7/18/2013 - Found out I was pregnant
    Dx with Gestational Diabetes at 28 weeks
    Dx with Macrosomia at 33 weeks
    Taking Glyburide and Metformin to control GD
    Due date is March 29th but we are moving forward with a scheduled C-Section on March 25th

  • Now how would I be looking to AW and comments that soothe my ego when no one knows what I look like? My point in asking people if they were skinny pre-pg was more for reference because it seems to me if you start out underweight, its easier to lose the weight after. And in asking if anyone lost weight immediately, I was trying to gauge if there is any element of water weight etc. maybe it would have suited you better if I posted a poll instead.
    You just can't win with some people.
  • And I think that's what people are trying to answer. That there are just too many factors to assess how (the arbitrary) 'skinny' will affect anyone's postpartum outcomes. And likewise, because literally every pregnancy and body is different, it's not constructive or valuative to assess what body changes might occur immediately after birth. I imagine that's why people are offering healthy suggestions - nutritionists, etc. - because it's the best way to take care of your particular body.
  • I'm a FTM, and I will not be worrying about when and how this weight is going to come off until I give birth and see where I stand at that point.

    Yes, the scale is hard to look at. But I appreciate knowing when I'm on track and when I've maybe overdone it with the 2 breakfasts, 5 snacks, and a second helping of dessert . :P

    Some of my earlier maternity clothes aren't fitting as well as they originally did. I'll need to get some leggings for the remaining couple of months. Oh, well! They'll be comfy!

    Between what will likely be an 8lb baby, plus amniotic fluid, plus blood, I'm sure I'll see my weight drop more than seems natural in the first week after delivery. Add in breastfeeding, and I'm feeling very optimistic about losing much of the excess in a reasonable amount of time. DH is already looking forward to family walks around the neighborhood, so that will help, too. This weight is packing on in a very steady pattern. I'm sure loss will happen much the same way. A pound a week on for 40 weeks (give or take) will eventually melt off with a bit of effort. Might take me another 40 weeks, though. :P

    GREEN to PINK on 3.14.14 
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  • Op, there's no way to say what your body will do or be like after pregnancy. Obviously, the baby will be out & amniotic fluid gone, so that's some weight gone. But you can't expect to be back to what you were right away.

    My experience- I gained 30lbs with dd. I had started out over weight. By 2 weeks after I was down 22lbs. The other right came off whenever. That said the shape of my body was different and clothes fit differently. You aren't supposed to start hard exercising til 6 weeks pp or when the dr clears you. You have to heal internally. Light walking was fine for me, if I felt up to it.

    Don't worry about your weight. There's no reason to dwell on it. It's going to come, it comes with being pregnant. Attached a pic to show where the weight comes from and obviously some of that goes away in its own after baby.
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  • I'll play. Before I got pregnant with DS, I weighed 140. I gained 30 lbs and within weeks of delivering was back down to 145. I never lost the remaining 5 lbs but rather in the 2 years I've had him I've gained more. Before getting pregnant this time, I weighed 165. At my 28 weeks appt today, I'm at 180. Highest I've ever been. Am I happy about it? Not really. Am I worrying about it? No because I don't see a point. I plan on starting a weight loss routine sometime after LO is born. I'd like to get back to 140. I'll worry about it then, when it matters more.
    Btw, I'm 5'7".
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  • OP - this is my second pg and it rooks us 6 years to get pg with my first son. I was overweight before that pg (and before this one) at pretty close to 200 lbs both times, at least partially due to PCOS. After DS was born, I lost all of the weight I had gained during the first 3 weeks after his delivery, BUT it was only because he was in the NICU for 9 weeks and I wasn't able to eat at his bedside. So I basically starved until he came home. Then I gained back all that weight because I was breast feeding and my body needed extra calories to make food for him. It probably took me nearly 9 months to re-lose the weight.

    Everyone's weight gain/loss is going to be very different. I don't love the fact that I've put on nearly 35 lbs in 28 weeks, but I'm growing 2 little people and they're worth it. I know that losing the weight is probably going to suck (especially since I'll have 3 under 3 and won't have a lot of mommy-only time) but I'm trying not to worry about it at this point. GL.
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  • By the time we started TTC this baby I had lost all the weight from my first pregnancy. That said, my chest measurement, hip measurement, and foot size is larger and will be that way forever. So while the number on the scale was the same, my body was not. I've known other women for whom this is true and other women for whom it is not. Neither my nor their experience can tell you anything about what your experience will be like because there are so many factors that will determine how your body reacts. 

    Eat healthy foods, get some exercise if you're up for it, and let your body do what it needs to do. If you start feeling down, focus on the baby. How much, how fast, how little, or how slowly you gainor don't  gain isn't an indication of what your experience will be post birth. 
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  • SmittyPantsSmittyPants member
    edited December 2013
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