Military Families
katieandivan
member
Options
Difficult Situation (vent)
katieandivan
member
I'm not necessarily looking for advice, but I wanted to vent about my situation. It's stressful and I'm looking for the silver linings to make it easier, but of course it's difficult no matter which way you go.
My DH and I are both enlisted. We've been separated since February (we've seen each other for approx 5 days every couple months, neither of us are deployed just geo-bachelors) and we have all of December together before he PCS's to Maryland. I'm 18w4d (due May 22) and in South Carolina. I won't be able to PCS his way until June at the very earliest. He has to find a place to live when he gets to MD in early January. The trick is getting a place close to his base and where ever I'll be stationed at (which could be one of four or five locations). And of course I can't even try to get orders until he already checks in, so there is zero way of knowing where I'll be working while he is looking for housing.
The not knowing of where I'll be is frustrating. But the timing of my move is bothering me more. Baby is due May 22. Under normal circumstances I can't move until mid-June. Due to potential restrictions, I might not be able to move until 4 months after I'm released from my OB's care (so LO will be about 5.5 months). Both DH and I have limited leave time, so having to wait until LO is 5 months old before we can live together is extremely disheartening. Doable, yes. But obviously not ideal.
I know things will work out, and we're already making progress. DH was originally going to a base I couldn't follow to and we were able to change that (thankfully I can follow to MD). I'm not worried about us as a couple. We've been separated for all of our engagement and marriage and are doing just fine. I also know this is the military, this is the life I chose. It's just a difficult situation, and I'd much rather our new little family be together.
Another silver lining, yes DH is missing the greater majority of the pregnancy. But since he's with me for a full month, he's able to go to the A/S, he was with me during the elective u/s when we found out we're having a little boy, and just today he was able to feel a tiny little kick for the first time (I felt it for the first time from the outside about an hour before he did).
Phew, sorry for the long post.
My DH and I are both enlisted. We've been separated since February (we've seen each other for approx 5 days every couple months, neither of us are deployed just geo-bachelors) and we have all of December together before he PCS's to Maryland. I'm 18w4d (due May 22) and in South Carolina. I won't be able to PCS his way until June at the very earliest. He has to find a place to live when he gets to MD in early January. The trick is getting a place close to his base and where ever I'll be stationed at (which could be one of four or five locations). And of course I can't even try to get orders until he already checks in, so there is zero way of knowing where I'll be working while he is looking for housing.
The not knowing of where I'll be is frustrating. But the timing of my move is bothering me more. Baby is due May 22. Under normal circumstances I can't move until mid-June. Due to potential restrictions, I might not be able to move until 4 months after I'm released from my OB's care (so LO will be about 5.5 months). Both DH and I have limited leave time, so having to wait until LO is 5 months old before we can live together is extremely disheartening. Doable, yes. But obviously not ideal.
I know things will work out, and we're already making progress. DH was originally going to a base I couldn't follow to and we were able to change that (thankfully I can follow to MD). I'm not worried about us as a couple. We've been separated for all of our engagement and marriage and are doing just fine. I also know this is the military, this is the life I chose. It's just a difficult situation, and I'd much rather our new little family be together.
Another silver lining, yes DH is missing the greater majority of the pregnancy. But since he's with me for a full month, he's able to go to the A/S, he was with me during the elective u/s when we found out we're having a little boy, and just today he was able to feel a tiny little kick for the first time (I felt it for the first time from the outside about an hour before he did).
Phew, sorry for the long post.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Difficult Situation (vent)