Pro-choice. For all the reasons listed above, as well as the fact that if someone is seriously considering abortion for whatever reason, that child is probably better off not coming into this world. And unfortunately, it's just not rational to expect all of those unwanted children to be adopted. However, for situations like those mentioned where multiple abortions are had because it's "like birth control," we need to have some serious monitoring and therapy for some of these people. If you have more than 3 abortions without legit reasons, you should have to be spayed. (Sorry if that comes off harsh, but I have known people with that attitude and they have no right to be bringing a child into the world...) I do also agree about the need for family planning education. I think it should be mandatory, but that will never happen.
Breastfeeding: I definitely want to try, but I'm not going to beat myself up if I have issues
Vaccinating: absolutely
Pro-life/Pro-choice: As far as I'm concerned, there's no such thing as pro-life. There's only pro-choice and anti-choice. If you support a women's right to choose, regardless of your personal feelings, then you are pro-choice. If you believe that you have the right to make that choice for other women, then you are anti-choice. That being said, I'm obviously pro-choice, but I think the real focus for everyone on both sides of the issue needs to be pro-prevention and education.
My H's niece (who is his age) has had 6 abortions. She uses them for birth control because (and I quote), "I don't want to take a pill every day and condoms are not as fun." This is where I get a bit judgy. She has 4 children and all but 1 have been taken away from her.
I've struggled with this with my clients. I really agree with PP, we need a lot more education on family planning.
MediCal pays for abortions in California, so she didn't care about any kind of family planning. She enjoyed getting them because her dr also prescribed pain meds after. This choice makes my stomach turn. I'm sorry if I offend anyone but that is my opinion.
You didn't offend me. I just wish more education was a part of the process. When I had my son, my dr was aware that it was an uninteresting pregnancy, and I didn't leave the hospital before making a decision on birth control. I'm sure she would have respected my decision had I decided not to use birth control, but she made sure I knew that I did not need to have another unintentional pregnancy. Sounds like this wouldn't matter with your husbands niece, so I I guess this doesn't matter either.
Circumcision: yes, DH is
Breastfeeding: yes, still am with Elli
Vaccinating: yes, all the necessary ones
Pro-life/Pro-choice: I would never get an abortion, that's my personal choice. That being said I view it as most the PPs, I believe we all have free will and should be able to make our own decisions based on our individual beliefs and circumstances. I totally agree we need more and better education.
Circumcision: No. Breastfeeding: Hopefully! Vaccinations: Yes. Pro-Life/ Pro-Choice: When it comes to me personally, I am Pro-Life, I could never abort. But when it comes to others, you never know why they may be aborting and I rather there be a safe place for them to make their choice then women everywhere dying from unsanitary abortions or from self aborting, etc. If a woman is a victim of rape, incest, etc and they choose to abort thats one thing. But I do not think it is okay to use abortions as birth control just because its legal and available.
Pro-life/Pro-choice: Choice. I would never make that choice, but I have plenty of friends who have, and I would never judget hem.
February Siggy Challenge - Picture of You and DH. Us with our engagement pumpkins. DH carved each word of "Will You Marry Me" and the date 10/11/12 into five dfferent pumpkins.
Circ: Yes, per the religious reasons I discussed with I think @Joules235 so long ago
BF: intend to, hoping for a much better supply this time around
Vax: Yep.
Choice all the way. I don't know if I would ever do it, but it should be an available option. I get irrationally and extraordinarily pissy at the religious church goers who picket a local women's clinic around the corner from me.
I'm finding it really interesting the number of women who defer to their husbands on the circ issue. I feel it is an issue, like so many others, that we make together. I'd love to hear the reasons why others said that.
Circumcision yes Breast feeding - tried last time, ended up pumping And miserable, not sure what I want to do this time.. Vaccinating - yes and on time. If you don't want to vaccinate your kid or choose a delayed schedule, keep your kid away from mine! Unless of course this is for medical reasons, then your kid could use the herd immunity.
Pro-choice. At this point in my life it is not for me, but who knows what life will bring. Who am i to say what is right or wrong for someone else.
I'm finding it really interesting the number of women who defer to their husbands on the circ issue. I feel it is an issue, like so many others, that we make together. I'd love to hear the reasons why others said that.
Good question - I'm one of the people who said that and had no idea so many others would too! We do make most decisions together though he says I get 51% vote on pregnancy-related stuff since it's my body on the line. For the circumcision question, the reason I'm deferring to him is I can really see both sides of the issue whereas he is strongly in favor of circumcision. If I had a strong opinion then it would definitely be something we'd need to hash out together, but since I'm torn I figure he can make the call. I also deferred the decision about whether to find out the sex to him since I was ambivalent about that too.
Married June 2012
TTC since February 2013
MC @ 7 weeks July 2013 BFP Oct 2013 - EDD June 7 2014!
Circumcision: I would say yes, but I honestly haven't talked about it with DH yet
Breastfeeding: Will
Vaccinating: Will
Pro-life/Pro-choice: Pro-choice; I don't know if I could ever have an abortion myself, but I was never in the position to have to make that decision, so I don't know.
BFP 12/30/12...MC 1/13...TTC again 6/11/13... BFP #2 9/28/13....EDD 6/7/14
@mullenem I didn't say no and I know your question wasn't directed at me but I'm answering anyway
I didn't try to breast feed either of my girls. My main reason may have had faulty thinking behind it but I don't drink milk and I don't take calcium supplements so I felt my kids were going to just as much nutrition, if not more, from formula than they would get from me.
Also, I was incredibly young and the thought of breast feeding creeped me out.
Circumcision: Leaving it up to my husband, and he's totally torn.
Breastfeeding: I will try very hard. I will do anything to be successful, including but not limited to NOT listening to my MIL's passive aggressive comments about pumping or my hippie friends on Facebook who post memes about the evils of formula.
Vaccinating: Not vaccinating is crazy to me, just like drinking raw milk. I just can't understand what people think the benefits are. Never heard a reasonable argument that can beat, "It prevents death and widespread disease and does NOT cause autism."
Pro-life/choice: I would never get an abortion ever, as far as I know. But I've never been in a situation where I needed to decide either. I guess that makes me pro-choice.
As I think the only one who said a direct no to BFing, can I ask why? I completely understand that it doesn't work out for everyone and that's okay, but you aren't even going to try, or try the first six weeks or something? I understand that some people have medical issues that can prevent it but baring that, I do feel that it's important to at least try it.
Haha nope, you want my reasons find the thread where joules went all crazy town and read that one. (I only say that because joules would agree she went crazy town herself)
ETA also I'm not the only one. One more ETA cause I'm kinda pissed your trying to start drama. Not your kid= not your concern.
Pro-CHOICE: just because I wouldn't do it personally doesn't mean I think the choice should be taken away for women who want/need one. Honestly, since having a child I understand how much of a toll it takes on your body and your emotions and I would never force that on anyone that didn't want it.
ETA: I know I'm likely going to get flamed for this, but it is a genuine question. For those who are pro-choice but so against the woman not using BC and having multiple abortions - why is that? If you don't feel that abortion is wrong, why would it matter to you the reason that someone else is choosing to have one? What is the harm that she's doing? This is 0% snarky. I'm genuinely asking because I don't understand that line of thinking. I think that most people who are pro-life would say that they believe the baby is a person and that it equates to murder, and that would be the issue. To be pro-choice, you must not feel quite that way, right? So what does it matter to you if someone has an abortion because something terrible has happened or due to their own "irresponsibility." Just trying to understand!
ETA: I know I'm likely going to get flamed for this, but it is a genuine question. For those who are pro-choice but so against the woman not using BC and having multiple abortions - why is that? If you don't feel that abortion is wrong, why would it matter to you the reason that someone else is choosing to have one? What is the harm that she's doing? This is 0% snarky. I'm genuinely asking because I don't understand that line of thinking. I think that most people who are pro-life would say that they believe the baby is a person and that it equates to murder, and that would be the issue. To be pro-choice, you must not feel quite that way, right? So what does it matter to you if someone has an abortion because something terrible has happened or due to their own "irresponsibility." Just trying to understand!
I think I was the first person to say that and for me it comes down to that as I said I think that in most cases life is the answer, but that I don't have control over anyone else's choices. I also think it's related to needing more education and family planning. I guess I don't have very solid reasons for how I feel, I just don't think that with all the other options there are abortions should be taken lightly and using them as birth control is not taking them seriously.
ETA: I know I'm likely going to get flamed for this, but it is a genuine question. For those who are pro-choice but so against the woman not using BC and having multiple abortions - why is that? If you don't feel that abortion is wrong, why would it matter to you the reason that someone else is choosing to have one? What is the harm that she's doing? This is 0% snarky. I'm genuinely asking because I don't understand that line of thinking. I think that most people who are pro-life would say that they believe the baby is a person and that it equates to murder, and that would be the issue. To be pro-choice, you must not feel quite that way, right? So what does it matter to you if someone has an abortion because something terrible has happened or due to their own "irresponsibility." Just trying to understand!
I have an old friend from hs who has had 4 abortions because she used that as a form of birth control. The reason it bugs me so much is because the anti-choice crowd often use women like this as the poster child for all abortions, so her blatant disregard for prevention gives those people ammo against something that can be beneficial for women who might consider that option. At the end of the day though, it's still her body and her choice so even though I think she's stupid for purposely having unprotected sex, its really none of my business.
@MississippiCatfish I actually do believe that a baby is a person, however, as it is a person that has no thoughts or feelings I think it is the woman's right to choose since it's a baby in her own body. The problem with using abortions as birth control is that it goes so much beyond that. If you are using abortion as birth control, there are so many other options that are so much better for you and your body. And to make such flippant decisions as "I'll just abort it if I get pregnant" without trying to prevent it from happening is incredibly irresponsible. Also, I can't imagine that an abortion is good for your body, especially when done repeatedly. At some point it becomes less of an issue of whether or not the baby is a person and more of an issue of taking responsibility for yourself and your actions. And as the proverb goes, it takes a village to raise a baby, if the village sees an act of negligence and irresponsibility and does nothing to correct, then they are falling.
Yes yes yes life
ETA: I know I'm likely going to get flamed for this, but it is a genuine question. For those who are pro-choice but so against the woman not using BC and having multiple abortions - why is that? If you don't feel that abortion is wrong, why would it matter to you the reason that someone else is choosing to have one? What is the harm that she's doing? This is 0% snarky. I'm genuinely asking because I don't understand that line of thinking. I think that most people who are pro-life would say that they believe the baby is a person and that it equates to murder, and that would be the issue. To be pro-choice, you must not feel quite that way, right? So what does it matter to you if someone has an abortion because something terrible has happened or due to their own "irresponsibility." Just trying to understand!
I am 100% pro-choice but I actually wonder the same thing. I believe that it does not matter what the reasons are, a woman's body is still theirs and it is still their choice to make, and it's not up to others to decide what is a "legitimate" reason to have an abortion.
Like you said above, it's either taking a life or it isn't. Why is it ok sometimes?
Pro-choice or pro-life: I would never choose to have an abortion, I don't think I could go through with it. But, I would never want the choice to have one taken away from any woman. Their body, their choice.
ETA: I know I'm likely going to get flamed for this, but it is a genuine question. For those who are pro-choice but so against the woman not using BC and having multiple abortions - why is that? If you don't feel that abortion is wrong, why would it matter to you the reason that someone else is choosing to have one? What is the harm that she's doing? This is 0% snarky. I'm genuinely asking because I don't understand that line of thinking. I think that most people who are pro-life would say that they believe the baby is a person and that it equates to murder, and that would be the issue. To be pro-choice, you must not feel quite that way, right? So what does it matter to you if someone has an abortion because something terrible has happened or due to their own "irresponsibility." Just trying to understand!
I am 100% pro-choice but I actually wonder the same thing. I believe that it does not matter what the reasons are, a woman's body is still theirs and it is still their choice to make, and it's not up to others to decide what is a "legitimate" reason to have an abortion.
Like you said above, it's either taking a life or it isn't. Why is it ok sometimes?
Right. That's what I was curious about.
I understand what you're saying @snlt1012. I agree that turning to any surgical procedure when there's a non-surgical option is not going to be the most prudent decision for your body! I just got the feeling from reading a handful of comments that it was more from a moral, "that's so wrong," standpoint and wondered why.
circumcision: honestly - I defer to hubby because I don't have one and don't have any real leanings either way. I don't see it a genital mutilation, nor a hygiene issue (either way) and so prefer to leave to decision to someone who at least has some experience with the equipment.
Bf/ff. I honestly know how has Bfing is, and that some women can't, but I do believe that every woman should at the very least try and not give up at the first sign of trouble. The most important thing is that baby gets fed- regardless of how.
Vax- I honestly don't understand how people can Not vaccinate. People the world over would do anything for the resources we have and it seems foolhardy to throw the technology and opportunities away and jeopardize the lives of others in the process - unless it is ACTUALLY medically necessary not to.
Pro-life-Pro-Choice. I really struggle with this one. I don't know if I have a real stance on it. As much as I don't believe that I have the right to dictate what another does with their body, I do also believe that someone needs to advocate for the (unborn) child. I struggle because I knew someone who was engaged and living with her fiancé, Ina very stable relationship/life and had an abortion because she had one semester of school left and didn't want to be pg for it. That seemed wrong to me. But- when you include things like t18, rape, and incest I really don't think there is a blanket answer. I also struggle because as much as I don't know if I could make the decision myself, I do wonder what type of life an unwanted child would end up having.
These are my honest answers and are ones that I am sure others with find issue with.
I think about it this way: you have the right to shoot (and kill) an intruder if you fear for your life. So are you going to leave all your doors and windows open and shoot everyone who comes in and tries to rob and or harm you? Or are you going to close and lock your windows and doors? Just because you have the right to take a life doesn't mean you shouldn't find ways to prevent that from happening... Especially when its something as simple as locking a door, or putting on a condom.
ETA: in reference to why women shouldn't use abortion as birth control.
These are my honest answers and are ones that I am sure others with find issue with.
People have actually been really respectful so far, I think. It's kind of awesome. Threads like this are refreshing to me.
ETA: I don't mind the occasional pot-stirrer or drama queen, either. Just liking the balance. Haha.
My answers were also long as some people (respectfully) asked for explanations as to why they feel the way they do. I see most issues along a grayscale as many of these issues are not black/white.
Re: As requested in FFFC
Circumcision: yes
Breastfeeding: I definitely want to try, but I'm not going to beat myself up if I have issues
Vaccinating: absolutely
Pro-life/Pro-choice: As far as I'm concerned, there's no such thing as pro-life. There's only pro-choice and anti-choice. If you support a women's right to choose, regardless of your personal feelings, then you are pro-choice. If you believe that you have the right to make that choice for other women, then you are anti-choice. That being said, I'm obviously pro-choice, but I think the real focus for everyone on both sides of the issue needs to be pro-prevention and education.
Breast feeding- yes
Vaccinations - yes
Pro life/pro choice- pro choice
Breastfeeding: Yes
Vaccinating: Yes for the most part
Pro-Choice
Breastfeeding Counselor with Breastfeeding USA
Babywearing Guide ** Newborn Carriers
Cloth Diaper Guide
Safe Bed Sharing Info
J14 May Siggy Challenge
**Colleen Donaghy**
Breastfeeding: Hopefully!
Vaccinations: Yes.
Pro-Life/ Pro-Choice: When it comes to me personally, I am Pro-Life, I could never abort. But when it comes to others, you never know why they may be aborting and I rather there be a safe place for them to make their choice then women everywhere dying from unsanitary abortions or from self aborting, etc. If a woman is a victim of rape, incest, etc and they choose to abort thats one thing. But I do not think it is okay to use abortions as birth control just because its legal and available.
Circumcision: yes, though I'll leave the final say up to H
Breastfeeding: yes
Vaccinating: yes
Pro-life/Pro-choice: choice
I'm not new. I just hate The Bump.
Circumcision: Yes
Breastfeeding: yes
Vaccinating: yes
Pro-life/Pro-choice: Choice. I would never make that choice, but I have plenty of friends who have, and I would never judget hem.
BF: intend to, hoping for a much better supply this time around
Vax: Yep.
Choice all the way. I don't know if I would ever do it, but it should be an available option. I get irrationally and extraordinarily pissy at the religious church goers who picket a local women's clinic around the corner from me.
I'm finding it really interesting the number of women who defer to their husbands on the circ issue. I feel it is an issue, like so many others, that we make together. I'd love to hear the reasons why others said that.
Breast feeding - tried last time, ended up pumping And miserable, not sure what I want to do this time..
Vaccinating - yes and on time. If you don't want to vaccinate your kid or choose a delayed schedule, keep your kid away from mine! Unless of course this is for medical reasons, then your kid could use the herd immunity.
Pro-choice. At this point in my life it is not for me, but who knows what life will bring. Who am i to say what is right or wrong for someone else.
Breastfeeding: will
Vaccinating: will
Pro-life/Pro-choice: pro-life
Interesting thread
Circumcision: yes
Breastfeeding: I am going to try to Bf. I Bfed all of my kids in one way or another for varied amounts of time.
Vaccinating: yes
Pro-life/Pro-choice: pro-life
9 angels in heaven-3 in my arms and 1 in the NICU
Mono/di twin girls: Josephine born to heaven and Evangeline born Earthside at 25w
Married June 2012
TTC since February 2013
MC @ 7 weeks July 2013
BFP Oct 2013 - EDD June 7 2014!
Breast feeding-yes
Vaxing- yes
Strongly pro-choice
The only ones I get riled up about are the last two. I will judge the hell out of anyone who doesn't vax and has no medical reason for doing so!
Oakley approves of the snoogle
Circumcision: I would say yes, but I honestly haven't talked about it with DH yet
Breastfeeding: Will
Vaccinating: Will
Pro-life/Pro-choice: Pro-choice; I don't know if I could ever have an abortion myself, but I was never in the position to have to make that decision, so I don't know.
BFP #2 9/28/13....EDD 6/7/14
I didn't try to breast feed either of my girls. My main reason may have had faulty thinking behind it but I don't drink milk and I don't take calcium supplements so I felt my kids were going to just as much nutrition, if not more, from formula than they would get from me.
Also, I was incredibly young and the thought of breast feeding creeped me out.
Breastfeeding: I will try very hard. I will do anything to be successful, including but not limited to NOT listening to my MIL's passive aggressive comments about pumping or my hippie friends on Facebook who post memes about the evils of formula.
Vaccinating: Not vaccinating is crazy to me, just like drinking raw milk. I just can't understand what people think the benefits are. Never heard a reasonable argument that can beat, "It prevents death and widespread disease and does NOT cause autism."
Pro-life/choice: I would never get an abortion ever, as far as I know. But I've never been in a situation where I needed to decide either. I guess that makes me pro-choice.
Due June 6th, 2014
Breastfeeding - yes
vaccination - yes
Pro-life/pro-choice : I am pro life unless it's a life risk to the mom, and in with @lilnunz1 I get confused when it comes to incest and rape
Married to DH 10.29.11
DD born 1.26.13
DS born 6.12.14
#3 due 12.6.16
As I think the only one who said a direct no to BFing, can I ask why? I completely understand that it doesn't work out for everyone and that's okay, but you aren't even going to try, or try the first six weeks or something? I understand that some people have medical issues that can prevent it but baring that, I do feel that it's important to at least try it.
Haha nope, you want my reasons find the thread where joules went all crazy town and read that one. (I only say that because joules would agree she went crazy town herself)
ETA also I'm not the only one. One more ETA cause I'm kinda pissed your trying to start drama. Not your kid= not your concern.
Breast feeding: I'm hoping I can EBF this time around where I EPed for a year with DS.
Vaccinating: yes
I am usually pro life but it gets kind of weird when you bring up rape or incest.
DS #1 born January 2010. DS #2 due June 2014.
Married 6/28/08, TTC 7/10, BFP 11/30/11! Charlotte Rose born on 8/4/12! TFAS 8/13, BFP 10/14/13! Lori Anne Catherine born on 6/13/14!
Breastfeeding: yes
Vaccinations: yes
Choice/life: Pro-life
ETA: I know I'm likely going to get flamed for this, but it is a genuine question. For those who are pro-choice but so against the woman not using BC and having multiple abortions - why is that? If you don't feel that abortion is wrong, why would it matter to you the reason that someone else is choosing to have one? What is the harm that she's doing? This is 0% snarky. I'm genuinely asking because I don't understand that line of thinking. I think that most people who are pro-life would say that they believe the baby is a person and that it equates to murder, and that would be the issue. To be pro-choice, you must not feel quite that way, right? So what does it matter to you if someone has an abortion because something terrible has happened or due to their own "irresponsibility." Just trying to understand!
I am 100% pro-choice but I actually wonder the same thing. I believe that it does not matter what the reasons are, a woman's body is still theirs and it is still their choice to make, and it's not up to others to decide what is a "legitimate" reason to have an abortion.
Like you said above, it's either taking a life or it isn't. Why is it ok sometimes?
Oakley approves of the snoogle
Breastfeeding: yes
Vaccines: yes, delayed though
Pro-choice or pro-life: I would never choose to have an abortion, I don't think I could go through with it. But, I would never want the choice to have one taken away from any woman. Their body, their choice.
Like you said above, it's either taking a life or it isn't. Why is it ok sometimes?
Right. That's what I was curious about.
I understand what you're saying @snlt1012. I agree that turning to any surgical procedure when there's a non-surgical option is not going to be the most prudent decision for your body! I just got the feeling from reading a handful of comments that it was more from a moral, "that's so wrong," standpoint and wondered why.
Thanks for the open conversation ladies:)
Breastfeeding: yes
Vaccines: yes
Pro-choice or pro-life: Pro-choice.
Bf/ff. I honestly know how has Bfing is, and that some women can't, but I do believe that every woman should at the very least try and not give up at the first sign of trouble. The most important thing is that baby gets fed- regardless of how.
Vax- I honestly don't understand how people can Not vaccinate. People the world over would do anything for the resources we have and it seems foolhardy to throw the technology and opportunities away and jeopardize the lives of others in the process - unless it is ACTUALLY medically necessary not to.
Pro-life-Pro-Choice. I really struggle with this one. I don't know if I have a real stance on it. As much as I don't believe that I have the right to dictate what another does with their body, I do also believe that someone needs to advocate for the (unborn) child. I struggle because I knew someone who was engaged and living with her fiancé, Ina very stable relationship/life and had an abortion because she had one semester of school left and didn't want to be pg for it. That seemed wrong to me.
But- when you include things like t18, rape, and incest I really don't think there is a blanket answer.
I also struggle because as much as I don't know if I could make the decision myself, I do wonder what type of life an unwanted child would end up having.
These are my honest answers and are ones that I am sure others with find issue with.
ETA: I don't mind the occasional pot-stirrer or drama queen, either. Just liking the balance. Haha.