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No one buying anything from registry...

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Re: No one buying anything from registry...

  • bellamatsonbellamatson member
    Meery82 said:


    shinder said:


    Meery82 said:


    shinder said:

    OP. i've found that most of the stuff we received at our shower was not neccessary anyways.... 
    you will be fine. Don't worry about the 'you should of though of that before you got pregnant' responses... all 100 of them.  I'm sure it will work out.




    Oh yeah, great advice. You're essentially telling her "don't worry about planning ahead and thinking of the future! Just wish real hard and hope everyone supports your child financially and everything will be just fab!" 

    You don't grasp the concept of reality, huh?
    8-|

    Yup. thats it exactly.  I'm telling her that...
    OR. I'm telling her not to stress because babies really require very few things and that she should wait until after the shower to see what is provided... I believe she also said she has things already. You keep judging her though.... stress is super healthy for pregnant ladies and unborn babies... Keep up the good work!!!





    Well, you actually didn't say any of that. And stress will not harm an unborn baby. But you keep blowing smoke up her ass! That's exactly what she needs!

    Only going to comment on this cuz I haven't read anything else.. But stress can harm an unborn baby in many different ways. Many woman who suffer from pre term labor have too much stress.

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  • heathern618heathern618 member
    I was on the complete opposite side of this, I wanted to buy everything off my registry once I saw no one was bying stuff. Then once my friends and family found out I was spending my own money, I got a nice talking too and it stopped. Also, I was "banned" from looking at my registry...it should be a surprise anyways. Most of these comments are right though, people wait until the last minute and just because it didnt come off your registry doesnt mean its not boughten. I registered at Target but know there were tons of stuff on sale elsewhere so it didnt bother me where they got it or how they got it, I am just thankful. If you are worried about being a single mom and not getting the essentials at the baby shower, then start buying little stuff here and there. It will be less stressful on you and your pocket. Plus try craigslist or thrift stores, some have really nice things. And if you have health insurance, they usually cover the cost of a breast pump.
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  • EmeraldCity84EmeraldCity84 member
    heathern618 said:
    I was on the complete opposite side of this, I wanted to buy everything off my registry once I saw no one was bying stuff. Then once my friends and family found out I was spending my own money, I got a nice talking too and it stopped. Also, I was "banned" from looking at my registry...it should be a surprise anyways. Most of these comments are right though, people wait until the last minute and just because it didnt come off your registry doesnt mean its not boughten. I registered at Target but know there were tons of stuff on sale elsewhere so it didnt bother me where they got it or how they got it, I am just thankful. If you are worried about being a single mom and not getting the essentials at the baby shower, then start buying little stuff here and there. It will be less stressful on you and your pocket. Plus try craigslist or thrift stores, some have really nice things. And if you have health insurance, they usually cover the cost of a breast pump.
    Thanks for the positive advice! I have been craigslisting like a boss. I am having the same feelings, like I should start buying this registry stuff if no one else is, but you're right, I need to to just stop looking at it and let it go until after the shower. And I am sending out for my free breast pump next week through insurance.  Thank God for small favors!!!
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  • ordinary1ordinary1 member
    I am late to this but will respond anyway. You are a single mom.  Being a parent means you are responsible for your child.  I get that you are on one income, but that is the decision you have made.  You shouldn't count on anyone to provide for your child.  You didn't plan on buying diapers? What the what?! Your shower should not be even thought of as a way to provide.  What are you going to do for the rest of your child's life? Throw a shower so you can get the necessities?
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  • EmeraldCity84EmeraldCity84 member
    @ordinary1 No! As I have said repeatedly on here, of course I plan to buy my baby diapers! And anything else she needs! It's just that, after registering, I felt some relief that I might not have to run around and get all this stuff myself, especially with a newborn, for the first few weeks.  But, everyone has opened my eyes, I'm a piece of shit for expecting to get anything from my registry.  So, I'm not worried about it anymore.
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  • ordinary1ordinary1 member
    No one said that.  People said you shouldn't be so entitled.  There was no need to feel 'relief' that you wouldn't have to buy everything on your own. 
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  • EmeraldCity84EmeraldCity84 member
    @meery82 I get it, thanks, you made your point. Again, I was just asking for advice. It's been given. No need to keep dumping on me. 
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  • Rosiesan1Rosiesan1 member
    I just had a shower and did not get things that was on my registered, but the great thing was I was able to return things to get the things I needed for the baby. In addition some people just wait until the day of or the day before to purchase gifts.
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  • Rosiesan1Rosiesan1 member
    Oh and also check and see if your county offers for free. I live in TX and was able to get a free car seat by taking a safty class and also check out kid second hand stores for your major things that you need. I am a single mother also SO I know exactly what you are feeling.
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  • Rosiesan1Rosiesan1 member
    My insurance company provided my breast pump 100%. CAll your insurance company.
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  • oknowmeoknowme member

    Usually people don't buy gifts until day before or day of the shower (so mine was held in late afternoon).

     And in my experience, I knew my family and friends couldn't shell out over $100 on a carseat for my baby, nor did I think they should, so as soon as I found out I was pregnant - I went straight to craigslist. DH and I budgeted and saved,had a garage sale of our own for extra cash and bought little by little, and watched for great deals.  

    I also attended events for Moms selling their used baby clothes and handled things that way.

    My Point - I registered but did not rely on that - it took a lot of planning and discipline on my part to get things done.

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  • Dreamingmommy4Dreamingmommy4 member
    This thread is over a week old. Leave it alone already.
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  • brittanyann1022brittanyann1022 member
    This happened to me too but then people finally started buying things off my registry very last minute (like 1-2 days before my shower). The morning of the shower, I was panicking because I still had so much left on there. But I received a lot of items that weren't on my registry - variations of things I had listed and a TON of clothes. I was so thankful everyone was so generous and I felt terrible for worrying.
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  • Tess024Tess024 member
    Rosiesan1 said:
    Oh and also check and see if your county offers for free. I live in TX and was able to get a free car seat by taking a safty class and also check out kid second hand stores for your major things that you need. I am a single mother also SO I know exactly what you are feeling.
    You got a free car seat??
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  • PALGalPALGal member
    Tess024 said:
    Rosiesan1 said:
    Oh and also check and see if your county offers for free. I live in TX and was able to get a free car seat by taking a safty class and also check out kid second hand stores for your major things that you need. I am a single mother also SO I know exactly what you are feeling.
    You got a free car seat??

    Some insurance companies offer free carseats too.
     
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  • kw42775kw42775 member
    I had my first shower last weekend and the majority of my gifts came off the registry. Most of the gifts came off the registry the day before the shower. I also got four gift cards and five packages of diapers (different sizes) and I didn't register for any diapers!

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  • Candi923Candi923 member
    Don't worry EmeraldCity84. I didnt get a lot things off my registry, but people gave me cash and gift cards. I was able to by a lot of my big items. Keep your headup and everything will work out!
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  • Danaleigh12Danaleigh12 member
    All she's asking for in the first place was advice not everybody on this message board has too be a total bitch about her decisions and her being a single mom she doesn't have two incomes like some of you other stuck up rude ass people I just had a baby shower mostly got what I wanted but I had got multiple items and I'm sure you'll be fine and efff all these stupid moms bashing you everyday they seriously have no life
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  • jess9802jess9802 member
    Why do people always complain about only getting clothes at a shower? Do you not realize how often you're changing a newborn's clothes due to diaper blowouts or spit up? The metric ton of clothes I got at my showers was awesome, because I wasn't doing laundry every damn day for months and months. I didn't have to buy clothes until DS was six months old, and we're still working our way through all of the baby shower clothes.

    It's definitely not for everyone, and perhaps not an option depending on your childcare situation (and if you're complaining about the cost of diapers wait until you price daycare for an infant), but cloth diapers have saved us SO MUCH MONEY. And those you most certainly can buy used.

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  • Crowsgurl22Crowsgurl22 member
    I was dealing with the same thing until recently a lot of people have been buying off of it.  I was also told a lot of people dont like using the registry and they rather buy their own, which i never understood cause you pick things out for a reason.  As of right now non of my crib sheets or towels are being bought.  Then again my sister told me people might have bought the item but didnt scan it off the registry, which could be a possibility too.  So expect doubles and returns for a lot of stuff.
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  • beckylynn23beckylynn23 member

    #1. I agree with everyone who says that you need to be grateful for the friend or family member who is giving you a shower. You just need to be grateful for whatever item you get for you baby.

    #2. I just had a shower with my friends and a couple of things happened...I ended up with 2 of the same diaper bags because it didn't come off the registry, so you don't know what may or may not have come off you registry...a couple of my friends went shopping the night before or the morning of...so those gifts came off the registry at the last minute and I didn't see...I got a couple of things that I didn't think to register for because I registered for the things I needed, not what just what I wanted. (ex: photo albums, baby wash, etc).

    #3. If you don't get what you "need" keep your eyes out for deals on craigs list or just buy the basic ones from the store. Once that baby arrives, you'll forget all about baby shower drama!

    #4. The diaper raffle thing at my shower didn't work (not my idea)...I only received 2 packs (which I was grateful for), but I did feel a little bad that people brought a gift and diapers.

    Good Luck!!

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  • krystina_ha@hotmail.comkrystina_ha@hotmail.com member
    i dont know why you are getting so much hate.  Im on my third pregnancy.  with my first, no one bought from my registry.  we bought everything ourselves.  so my second baby, i didnt do a registry.  i did one with my third and everyone pretty much bought off it but it was the day before or the day of my baby shower.  i only did a registry because people asked...and i know everyone works hard for their money (after christmas and birthdays i usually spend alot of time purging what my kids dont like).  we try to live a simple uncluttered lifestyle.
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  • EmeraldCity84EmeraldCity84 member
    I wasn't going to update on this, but since others have brought it back to the main page I will.  My shower was Saturday and it was absolutely lovely.  Even with 4 cancellations the day of, we were at capacity in the party room we rented, so it was a great turn out.  (Only 24 people, I have very small family and circle of friends, but was happy to see everyone there.)  EVERYONE brought a wrapped gift, I got zero gift cards, which I thought was really nice becuase it means every single person took the time to go to a store (or shop online, whatever.)  It turned out that I got 2 things off my registry, so I wasn't just being paranoid, no one was touching the registry.  But, that being said, everything  I did get was fantastic, it was 95% clothes and blankets, with some other odds and ends.  The only thing I am thinking of doing is, since most of the clothes I was given are NB size, is taking them back and exchanging for 0-3 and 3-6 sizes so I have a little more variety.  Also, the only weird thing was that I registered for a diaper pail, which I did not get, but 2 women brought other diaper pails of a different brand.  That was the only duplicate I got, and I just thought it was weird 2 people would choose that item to go off-registry on.  So, both will go back and I'll get the one on my registry.  Moral of the story, I still have hundreds of dollars of big ticket items to purchase myself, and no one really did buy off the registry, but I am super grateful and feel completely loved by not only the turn out but the fact that everyone brought a physical gift.
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  • Meery82Meery82 member
    @traceyh000, remove the flag and read the terms of service.
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  • allie6687allie6687 member
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  • luvmybundleluvmybundle member
    just wanted to say that i too am preparing to be a single mother.  i understand the financial aspect. i too have registered for things i need, but i never EXPECTED to get those things.  sure it would be great if someone purchased that crib for me or the carseat, or even cases of diapers.  but what if they didn't?  its up to me to have those things and therefore, i purchased them (minus the crib). my car seat and stroller was on sale and although i hate the colors, its something i had to suck up and deal with. my registry is there, and if anyone asks me i'll tell them but its not my place to make them buy things i need.  don't get overwhelmed with it. we have it a little harder than others but we can manage if we focus. good luck.
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  • luvmybundleluvmybundle member
    didn't realize how old this thread was......my bad.  hope everything worked out.
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  • emirreeemirree member
    I did this at both my baby shower and my baby sprinkle! It's not "gross" or "rude" as others have said, and it's not asking for an additional gift. I did a "diaper/wipes raffle", and told my guests in the invitation, that if they WANTED to be in a drawing for a prize, that they were welcome to bring either a package of wipes or diapers and they would get their name in the drawing. people who brought both got their name in twice! Everyone gets excited about it, all the ladies loved it, and it's a good way to stock up on diapers! If no one wants to participate, then fine. You're not forcing anyone to buy you diapers or wipes or anything, you're making it into a fun part of the party, where they DO get something in return by participating if they win! 

    and to the woman about "MTB not being allowed to dictate what happens at her own baby shower", umm..hello. I was a main hostess for both of mine and it's YOUR party, not the person who is running it. You definitely get a say in what goes on-no need to upset a pregnant woman!
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  • Meery82Meery82 member
    emirree said:
    I did this at both my baby shower and my baby sprinkle! It's not "gross" or "rude" as others have said, and it's not asking for an additional gift. I did a "diaper/wipes raffle", and told my guests in the invitation, that if they WANTED to be in a drawing for a prize, that they were welcome to bring either a package of wipes or diapers and they would get their name in the drawing. people who brought both got their name in twice! Everyone gets excited about it, all the ladies loved it, and it's a good way to stock up on diapers! If no one wants to participate, then fine. You're not forcing anyone to buy you diapers or wipes or anything, you're making it into a fun part of the party, where they DO get something in return by participating if they win! 

    and to the woman about "MTB not being allowed to dictate what happens at her own baby shower", umm..hello. I was a main hostess for both of mine and it's YOUR party, not the person who is running it. You definitely get a say in what goes on-no need to upset a pregnant woman!

    @-) =))
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  • JuneMrsJuneMrs member
    I know for my shower I got a lot from my registry at the last minute. I returned a ton of stuff that I didn't feel was 'necessities' for credit to be used later on things like a crib mattress and extra diapers. I would wait until after your shower to worry about what you do and do not get because who knows what gifts may be given. As you progress in your pregnancy friends, neighbors, etc. may also offer you hand me down clothes or packs of diapers they started but never finished because they had a child who changed sizes. Good luck with your pregnancy!
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